Scene: Same as Act II, later that day towards dusk.
(Enter Worthy.)
Worthy
I keep returning and going over all I intend to do. How can a witty
girl, so reasonable and sensible, when love seizes her, be able to
display her genius and her passion at the very same time? For my part,
I owe it all the consideration love can think of. Scratch is prepared
for all he must do. Some help with money will be necessary for us.
(Enter Albert.)
Albert
I cannot stay in this place a single moment. I come, I go, I run
about. Everything increases my torment. Near her, my wit is troubled
like hers. Her access of madness redoubles every moment. (seeing
Worthy) Ah, sir, am I sufficiently numbered amongst those who are
considered your friends that I can rely on the aid you have promised
me? Will this man who boasted to me of his talents use his experience?
In the state I am in, I ought to consent to anything: when one loves
completely one takes all risks.
Worthy
I take it as a pleasure to do you this good turn. At all times one
ought to do good deeds. Today's patient made me pity her too much for
me not to show you signs of friendship. The man in question will be
here soon. I wanted to test him and understand his knowledge of this
malady. But he spoke to me in terms so precise, explaining to me the
cause and effect, that in all truth, I believe he knows more than
anyone else.
Albert
Sir, what service can equal yours? Heaven itself, effortlessly, sent
this person here--expressly to oblige me.
Worthy
I won't guarantee this profound science. You know that these people
come from all over like Gypsies, carrying treasured remedies for all
sorts of ills. It's much, if they don't claim to have resuscitated the
dead; but if one can judge what he can do from what he told me--this
is the man for your business. He only wants to wait till sundown. If
you wish it, you may test him. Thus, I discharge my duty as a friend.
Albert
Sir, I am persuaded of his merit. Everyday we see how this sort of man
learns secrets from traveling the world over.
(Enter Jenny.)
Jenny
Ah, heaven! You are about to witness another perfect folly. If it
continues, you'll have to tie her up.
(Enter Arabella, her hair is completely grey, her clothes disheveled.)
Arabella
Good day, sweet friends, God protect ye, my children! Well, what is
it? How do you spend your time? May heaven send you health for a long
time, and keep you strong and happy. Sorrow's no good and frets the
spirit. You have to enjoy yourself, and it's I who say it.
Worthy
In spite of her age, I find her charming. One can still look for the
return of youth.
Arabella
Ho! You look at me--you are amazed to find me so young with grey hair.
I feel better than all of you: I take four meals a day, and I read
without glasses. I drink rum, or whatever is available, stale or
fresh. I drink it to the last drop--and I never mix it with water. I
genteelly empty my two bottles.
Jenny
Plague!
Arabella
Yes, truly, some more champagne--without any delay. You can see all my
teeth in my mouth. Do you see, I'll be ninety-eight come Easter?
Jenny
Her youth is the last straw.
Arabella
There's more still. But I am of a green old age. At the age I'm at, I
still don't allow myself any servants--besides, they'd charge me too
much. But, do you see, my friend, do you want me to tell you? People
today, they're shoddy goods--they're not worth anything, and I
wouldn't bend over to pick up the lot of them.
Worthy
Is she often overcome with these vapors?
Albert
Alas, never. She must be bewitched.
Arabella
At my age, I am still worth my weight in gold. My children have done
me wrong. I don't look half my age. If I hadn't been married at
thirteen--to tell you the truth, marriage and childbearing puts an end
to youth. Such great peril. I never can remember having been a child.
To tell you the truth, I was pretty enough. At twenty-seven I had
fourteen children.
Jenny
What fertility! Fourteen!
Arabella
Yes, all swarming. And all boys. I've never had any girls. And you see
others turn out like ours. But (winking) they're rogues who'll turn
out badly. These evil ones wanted to see me in a hospital. Would you
believe that after the death of their late father, they squabbled with
me over my dower rights? A dower earned so legitimately.
Albert
Alas, can one push mental aberration further?
Jenny (aside)
My word, the little baggage plays her role charmingly.
Arabella
I will need a hundred crowns. Lend them me, sir, to pay for expenses
and to bribe the judge in my unfortunate case.
Albert
You dream, my child,--but to satisfy you, I will advance expenses and
make your case my business.
Arabella
If I don't have money today, I'll be in despair.
Albert
But think, child--
Arabella
You're an honest man. Don’t refuse to give me that sum.
Albert
I intend to humor her.
Worthy
You're wise to do so. You shouldn't contradict her directly.
Jenny
If you resist her, she's the type of girl to go throw herself out the
window.
Albert
I agree.
Jenny
I remember that you recently received about a hundred crowns. What
risks is there in falling in with her wishes?
Albert
It's true that, right now, I could take them away from her. (to
Arabella) Here. Here's the money--go. May these hundred crowns give
great success to your law suit.
Arabella
Now I am sure of succeeding in our business. (taking the purse) But
this aid was quite necessary. Give my lawyer this money, Jenny. I
believe he will be diligent in serving me.
Jenny
He will lack nothing.
Worthy
You may be sure, Madame, that I wish to serve you with all my soul.
Arabella
I will go back and return in more decent clothes--to go with you to
solicit the judge in this urgent matter and demand justice. Goodbye.
May, one day, heaven reward you for this service to a widow who is to
be pitied, who has many sorrows, who is set on by rogues.
(Exit Arabella.)
Jenny (to Worthy)
Here's something to speed your business, sir.
Worthy
I will take care of the case. I know what to do.
Albert (to Jenny)
Be careful of the money.
Jenny
Don't be concerned. I am sure, body for body, it is in good hands.
(Exit Jenny.)
Albert
You see how this folly grows. Your man doesn't come, and I'm getting
worried.
Worthy
I don't know what's keeping him. He ought to be here. But, relax, I
see him coming.
(Enter Scratch.)
Albert
Ah! Sir, come. We both await your arrival with impatience.
Scratch
A wise philosopher said elegantly: In all things make haste slowly.
I've been doing research for some time to determine if the malady
whose remedy we are seeking resides in the upper or lower regions.
Hippocrates says yes, but Galen says no. It seems to me, time spent
reconciling these gentlemen isn't wasted.
Albert
Have you discovered, sir, from whence her malady proceeds?
Scratch
I've discovered it--clear as crystal.
Albert
So much the better. You must know that the beautiful patient is
continuously developing some new crisis in her illness. In these
remote parts, there are no doctors. This gentleman has counseled me to
put her in your hands.
Scratch
Without doubt, she'd be better in his. But, I hope to expend my
efforts usefully.
Albert
You have cured these diseases before?
Scratch
Me? Have I cured them? Ah, truly, so I believe. There's a bit of magic
in my art. With three words, that I was taught by a Jew in Arabia, I
cured a child in the Congo, a kid who really had quite a case of
vertigo. I leave it to doctors to practice their science on diseases
which pain the body. The object of my specialty is more noble. It
cures all ills which attack the mind. I wish you were to become manic
now--atrabalious, mad, even hypochondriacal. So as to have the
pleasure of rendering you as wise as I am by tomorrow--and healthy in
body, too.
Albert
Sir, I am obliged to you for such great zeal.
Scratch
Without wasting time, let's go to the beautiful patient.
Albert (stopping him)
No, sir, if you please, there's no need. I am going to take the
trouble to bring her to you.
(Exit Albert.)
Worthy
Everything's going well. Fortune interests herself in our cause. In
your absence Arabella, by means of a beautiful ruse, has figured out
how to extract these hundred crowns from Albert.
Scratch (amazed)
How'd she do that?
Worthy
You'll learn everything in time. Now, we must find a way to save
Arabella, and be off, without losing a moment. We'll only be able to
separate her from this wretch for a single instant. Albert won't leave
her, and even follows her about, so we don't know what to do.
Scratch
Rely on me. I'll manage it! You have wit, I am not stupid--and the
pretended patient understands the merest hint.
Worthy
I am thinking of a way that's very crazy--but who cares? The play will
be better because it will be stronger. We must convince Albert that
with certain words--as you already told him--you can cure her of this
illness--but someone else must take the frenzy. I will offer myself,
so as to be ready for all emergencies. Let me alone after that.
Scratch
But, how do you hope to get Arabella to take part in this plan,
without knowing about it?
Worthy
I will instruct her in all, I give you my word. But, think only of
playing your role well. When Arabella comes back, keep the old man
busy to give me time to explain everything to her. A few words are all
the instruction she'll need. Albert is late--ah, but I see him leaving
the house.
(Enter Albert.)
Albert
God conduct the ship and send it to safe harbor.-- Oh, gentlemen, her
folly increases every moment. A military delusion now torments her.
She's turned her ball dress into a uniform, she's taken up armor,--a
dragoon's helmet and a large scimitar. She speaks only of blood and
combat. My money must serve to raise an army. She wants to draft me.
(Enter Jenny and Arabella. Arabella is in a fantastic military
outfit.)
Arabella
Death--long live war! I cannot remain useless around here. My outfit
is ready. Ah, Marquis, it's fortunate I find you in this place. I've
come to say goodbye to you. I've found money to finance my campaign--
and this very night I leave for Germany!
Albert
Heavens--what mental aberration!
Arabella
By God, officers are wrong to obtain money from the dirty hands of
usurers. Better to intrigue--better to inflate the roster. This fellow
(pointing to Albert) loaned me his money. I hold him to be the
greatest rogue, the worst Jew, the worst dog that one can find in such
affairs. I wish someone would bring me his ears.-- Now, I'm ready to
go serve the king. Nothing's left to do, except for you to go with me.
Worthy
Wherever you go, I will go. (to Albert) It's prudent to humor her.
Arabella
I quit forever the standard of love. Under its banner, I could go far,
someday. I have a thousand endearing qualities--wit, manners. I know
the secret of humbling the proudest woman. But for what? What do you
want of me? I am not made for women. Glory is what I want. This
inhuman Glory, with its brilliant flesh enslaves me. The poor sex can
die of love and boredom before I'll do anything for them.-- No more
delay--I go where Glory calls. Lead my horse, the time is propitious.
Post, run!
Scratch
I won't leave her. I'm ready to follow her into the midst of combat.
(Albert surprises Worthy speaking to Arabella.)
Worthy
I examined her eyes. From what I see, some violent access takes hold
of her, and will be followed by drowsiness. Order an armchair brought
here quickly.
Arabella
Delay me from reaching the field of battle? From tearing victory from
our enemies? Let widows mourn--let lovers cry! Children, follow me,
raise your spirits. I see your courage shine in your faces. Let all
here feel the horror and the carnage. Fix bayonets! Firmly--good. The
rogues don't dare face us. Ah--cowards, you flee-- No--no quarter--
flee. (faints)
Scratch
In a short while, the blood will flow properly again.
Albert (beside himself)
Her wit's gone, without hope of return.
Scratch
Everything's ready. In my opinion, her illness is nothing more than a
repressed humor, an irritated spirit, which is trying to free itself.
Some demon of love has seized her mind.
Albert
What--the poor girl is possessed?
Scratch
This violent demon from which we must save her is very strong and
could take her from us. If I only had a subject in whom I could make
this spirit of madness enter, I could quite answer for it.
Albert
Jenny is a perfect subject. No need to search further. She'll serve
our turn.
Jenny
I kiss your hands--and give you my word, I'll do not such thing. I am
already crazy enough.
Worthy
Hurry up. Her illness augments every minute.
Scratch
Curses. This isn't a child's game. One cannot proceed too carefully.
When a demon gets in a man's body, I can get it out easily enough.
But, in the body of a female, it's quite another matter.
Worthy
To learn today the extent of his skill, I intend to deliver myself to
his care. I begin to doubt the effect. I think he's planning to mock
you and me. I intend to embarrass him.
Scratch
Me? I'll show you, and put you in a state where you cannot talk. Put
yourself beside her. A knee on the ground, and stay put there. Always
keep your gaze fixed on her beautiful eyes--your hand joined straight
to hers. (to Albert) Do you permit him to give her his hand, so the
force of attraction will be very strong?
Albert
Yes, I consent to everything.
Scratch
So much the better. You'll see a surprising effect shortly. (Scratch
makes several passes over the lovers with a wand) Microc--Salaam--
Hippocrata.
Arabella
Heaven--what heavy cloud is lifting from my eyes?
Worthy
What somber vapor is obscuring things around here?
Arabella
What a calm replacing trouble has come over my spirit.
Worthy
What confused tumult redoubles in my feelings? What profound abyss
opens under my feet? What dragon pursues me? Ah, traitor, you will
die--I intend to purge the world of a monster like you.
(Worthy chases Albert about, sword in hand.)
Scratch (coming between them)
Ah, sir, avoid his furious rage. Save yourself, save yourself. Let me
draw some blood and poison from his side. (holding Worthy) From the
violent access with which he's transported, I can see I've given him
too strong a dose.
Worthy
I intend to sacrifice him to my just fury.
Scratch
Don’t you have some strong liquor or spirits to calm this fury? He's
going to escape me.
Albert (drawing his key)
Yes, I have what he needs. Jenny, take my key, go, run upstairs, take
the viol--
Jenny
I'm afraid I'm too upset to do it properly. You'd better go instead.
Scratch
Run--quickly. Would you let a man who has offered to die for you
perish?
Jenny (pushing Albert)
Go, quick--go now!
Albert
I'LL BE RIGHT BACK!
(Exit Albert. As soon as Albert leaves, everybody stops and there is a
moment of absolute quiet.)
Worthy
Don't lose any time--let's get out of here. Head for the woods. Albert
won't know which way love has headed us.
Arabella
I put my life and my fate in your hands.
Scratch
Live, live, Scratch--and long live Folly. Let's run cross-country to
meet our fate--and leave Albert all alone here to pour out his rage.
(Exit Worthy, Arabella, Scratch, and Jenny in a wild burst of speed.
After a moment, enter Albert with a phial in his hand.)
Albert
I bring an elixir of astonishing strength.-- But, I don't see anybody.
What suspicion overwhelms me. Jenny! Arabella! Oh, heaven! All is deaf
to my cries. What's become of them? What road have they taken? Where
to run? Thief-- Police! Help! I stagger, I faint, I fall--for this
feigned folly has seduced me, and I alone have lost my wits today.
Here's the ridiculous end of my love. Ah, cursed bottle (throws the
phial) and credulous old man. Come, follow their steps, we won't give
up. Traitorous ravishers--you will be hanged! And you, deceitful sex--
more to be feared than fire, plague, famine, and war--you ought to be
cursed by all men. I consign you forever to the devil. Let him take
you!
CURTAIN
End of Project Gutenberg's The Follies of Love, by Jean-Francois Regnard