sweet as ever chortled to its gasping mother, but snatched from me
as it has been by the cruellest of whelks, it may even now lie helpless
in the grasp of the ravenous brute, as it ruthlessly sups off its
delicate limbs. No such grief have I had since that old native, my
worthy husband, was slain, and was laid in state, his hoary head
supported by a slice of lemon, beside a piece of brown bread-and-butter."
[Illustration: I PLEADED MY CASE]
'Deeply affected by her grief, I begged her to reveal the name of the
little one and to indicate the direction taken by the marauding whelk.
"Bertram is its name," said the widowed blue point, and I could hear
the tears falling within the shell as, with her beard, she pointed out
the path followed by the rogue.
'I had not proceeded far in the direction indicated when I overtook a
whelk, whose face was quite distorted by a savage look, and whose growls
drowned the feeble cries of a tender blue pointlet whom he dragged along
by the beard.
'"Now what is all this about?" said I to the sullen fellow. "Why should
you, who are maybe blessed with young of your own, rob a poor widowed
oyster of her only consolation since the death of her husband? A heart
of rock would have melted at the cries of your victim, but you,
ungenerous, can have no heart at all, and entirely drag the name of
whelk through the mud." I could distinctly hear the ruffian lashing his
tail within his shell as he replied: "It's all very well for you, old
boy, but all that kind of nonsense you're talking don't come in here. If
it were a question of saving your own life I'll bet you wouldn't give
much ear to the whimperings of a sentimental blue point. Know then, old
stick, that it isn't for the love of children that I am dragging this
little brat along, but he's just going to be the supper of an old crab,
who caught me this afternoon and only let me go on the condition that I
found him something a little more toothsome and tender than I am."
'The cries of the infant were cruel to hear when it learnt the fate in
store for it, and filled my heart with pity for the frail youngster.
"Now come," said I to the whelk, "just wait a little while and consider,
would it not always be a sad thing for you to reflect upon that you had
been the cause of this frail young thing's death?" "Gammon!" answered
the leather-hearted whelk, and proceeded on its journey. "Stay yet
awhile," cried I, "and I will run and talk it over with the crab and see
if his hard shell may hide a kinder heart than yours." "Well, look
alive, old sentiments," replied the whelk; "it's a bit chilly waiting
about out of the water when the tide's low. You'll see the old rascal
over there by the sea."
'I hastened with what speed I might in the direction pointed out by the
whelk, and presently came upon the old crab. Before I had time to greet
him he accosted me with "Well, old kneebones, what's the trouble?" "No
trouble of mine I do assure you," I replied as I seated myself by his
side, taking care at the same time to keep well out of reach of his two
pincer claws, that wobbled about wickedly in my direction; thus in some
trepidation I continued the conversation. "The trouble is that of an
innocent blue pointlet, now alas! in the toils of a perfect bully of a
whelk, a worthless rough who is thus victimising the innocent to save
himself from ending his paltry existence in your inside. Now my good
fellow, I am perfectly certain that you are not going to allow this,
indeed you are not the sort to sacrifice another's life to satisfy your
own greed. Let me press you, just for once, to go supperless to bed, and
thus assuage the anguish of a most affectionate mother."
'Much to my mortification and surprise, my conciliatory speech was met
by roars of laughter from the flippant old crab. Peal upon peal
disturbed the still evening air, and when the last clash of the hideous
uproar had died away among the distant hills, the unfeeling brute, now
in a state of collapse from loss of breath, gasped out:--"What, me give
up the only chance of saving myself from that scoundrel of a lobster who
only let me go on my promising to secure him something for supper a
little less hard than myself! Well," continued the crab, "that's a good
'un, that is. My good chap you must be quite out of your senses. Why,
not only will I hand over the baby oyster to the lobster, but I intend
also to have my supper off that tough old idiot of a whelk, who reckons
he's going to get off scot-free, and old mother blue point, too, if I
can find her," and then, as an afterthought, "and you, old marrow-bones,
wouldn't make half a bad tit-bit if I could get hold of you," and he
made a horrid dash at me as he spoke. However, I easily evaded him, and
from a safer distance argued the matter out with him in the following
way:--
'"Allow me, my dear crustacean, to put the matter to you in this light.
Now, first of all, clear your mind of all unnecessary bias. Suppose,"
said I, "that you were to change places with the young oyster, suppose,
we'll say, that you had the near prospect of being devoured by the
greedy lobster. How would you feel, I say, if your neighbour not only
refused to exert himself in any way to extricate you from your
predicament, but also gloried in being the main cause of the disaster
that threatened you?"
[Illustration: AND KILLED IT ON THE SPOT]
'The wily scoundrel merely replied, "Ask me another," and with his left
eye-stalk bent towards the ground, insolently winked at me with the
other. Despairing of penetrating his tough shell with kindly
suggestions, I temporised with him, and succeeded in persuading him to
desist from his evil intentions until I had talked it over with the
lobster. Out of sheer perversity the crab directed me wrongly, but in
good time, after some wandering here and there, I discovered the
lobster.
'I pleaded my case to him as eloquently as I had already done to the
others,--nay, even more eloquently, being, no doubt, a little more used
to it by now, but yet with no apparent good result. The wary creature
pretended ignorance. "To which crab do you refer?" said he, in a
questioning tone; "I have so much business with crustaceans in one way
and another that you would be surprised to learn how confused I become
in my dealings with them." To the best of my ability I described the
appearance of the old crab, and aided my description with a slight
sketch on the sand made with the point of my umbrella. He gazed at this
with much interest and murmured to himself "considerable artistic
talent," and then aloud, "Oh yes, yes, I remember him quite well;
indeed, he was here only recently about a little matter of supper. Well,
well, I'm afraid I cannot be of any help to you here. You see, it's like
this. Earlier in the day, I came to a little arrangement (quite a little
business affair, by the way) with an old lady conger eel I have known
for many years, and it happened in this way. We were having a little
dispute as to who should sup off the other, and without going into
details, the upshot of it all was that the eel managed to tie herself in
a knot round my throat, and so, you see, was mistress of the situation.
I need not tell you that I did not lose my presence of mind--indeed, I
never do--and I politely asked her if she had ever tasted crab, and
effectually persuaded her that they were much better eating than
lobster, and undertook to procure her a beauty (thinking all the time,
of course, of our mutual friend), on the understanding that I should go
quite free. It's very sad and all that sort of thing, no doubt, about
the little oyster--sweet little chuck--indeed, I am more sorry than I
appear to be about it, but really what can one do?" And the lobster
shrugged his bristling shoulders. "Speaking to you," he continued, "as
one man of the world to another, business is business after all, you
know. And if we don't fulfil our obligations, where do we stand? Of
course, I don't say but what a little chat with the conger might make it
all right, and there's no harm in trying--she's a nice eel. I feel sure
you would like her, at least I felt I should, when I invited her to be
my supper--and if nothing comes of the meeting, well, we shall none of
us be any worse off than we are at the present moment. If at any other
time I can be of use to you, I do hope that you will not hesitate to
come round and ask. Good day."
'I now left him to search for the conger, whom I found dozing in a pool
near the sea. I took her out and placed her gently on the sand, and she
gradually opened her eyes and fastened them on me. I once more expounded
the reasons why, in my opinion, this cruel arrangement should not be
persisted in. I quite astonished myself by my own eloquence, which grew
more impassioned as I proceeded, and noticed that the old conger seemed
deeply impressed. As I came to the most affecting parts of my argument
the expression in her eyes grew really tender, and at the mention of
the little blue point a tear gathered in each eye and slowly coursed
down her shiny form. At the conclusion of my appeal the conger drew in a
deep breath and replied:--"Well, I never! Now that is what I really do
call good and kind. Oh pray come and sit down beside me on the sand and
tell me all about it--now do, and tell me what first put it into your
head--it is so very nice to come across a little real sentiment in these
matter-of-fact times." Without waiting for me to proceed she rattled
on:--"Upon my word, you really must have the kindest heart in the
world--but are you quite sure you are comfy? Why not come round the
other side; you'll be out of the wind there, and we can talk it over
without anything to interfere with us. I quite agree with you in
everything you have said, and I must say that I know of nothing more
delightful than to find one's own thoughts expressed so much more
clearly than one could do it oneself. Do you know, I am quite delighted
to have met you, and hope that this is the commencement of one of those
lasting friendships...."
[Illustration: WE COOKED ONE GREAT STEAK]
'Thus she gabbled on, and thinking to myself, here, at last, is a
kind-hearted soul, I asked her to promise to take the baby oyster back
to its sorrowing mother, when she received it from the lobster. "What an
extremely kind thought," she replied; "I assure you there is nothing in
the whole world I would love to do so much as to take the little thing
back to its Ma." Glancing dreamily at the sky the old eel
continued:--"Dear little mite! I can see it even now, in my mind's eye,
as it skips to its mother; she, dear soul, the while shedding pearls of
delight,--a memory to carry to your grave. But I expect you must be
going now--no doubt you are as busy as the rest of us--are they all well
at home?--good-bye," and she prepared to return to the sea. "But, my
dear woman," I protested, "I have not yet received your promise to see
the little oyster home." "Now," said the eel, "pray don't spoil the
pleasant evening we have had--but never mind--don't look so
serious--come round some evening with the wife and children--don't say
you won't." "But, Madam," I answered, "I am waiting for your promise to
see the little one home." "My dear Sir," she replied at last, growing
rather red in the face, "I can give you nothing of the kind, and must
really refer you to the whale who captured me a little while ago, and
only released me because I promised to procure him a lobster, which I
persuaded him would be much more digestible and less bilious than I
should prove to be as a meal."
'I now went in search of the whale, whom I discovered disporting himself
in the sea a very little way from the shore. Taking my shoes and
stockings off, I waded as near to him as I dared, and to conciliate him
right off I wore as benignant an expression as I could assume and thus
addressed him: "Of one thing I am convinced," said I, "and it is that
you are the last person in all the world who would willingly give pain
to anything,--least of all to a baby oyster." "Quite so, quite so,"
snorted the whale, "and what is more I never have and, upon my soul, I
never _will_." "Bravo, good resolution," cried I, and then in moving
terms I explained the situation and urged him to take the blue pointlet
back to its mother on receiving it from the conger eel. "What is this
you say," roared the whale; "do you mean to tell me that in exchange for
her own fat self that villainous conger-eel now offers me a baby oyster
instead of the promised lobster? Is it for this gross insult that I
allowed her to resume her wretched existence? Well, I'm thundered!" and
the enraged monster leapt seventy feet into the air. "Where is she?"
roared he, and made off in the direction of the conger.
'But the old girl was one too many for the whale this time, and having
heard his remarks on her conduct, off she darted after the lobster,
saying to herself that as the whole arrangement had fallen through, she
might just as well sup off the lobster,--besides, the claws would stew
up quite well for the children's dinner to-morrow. The lobster in his
turn, seeing the conger approach, at once understood that the affair was
all off and left his little cave by the back door as conger entered by
the front, and made for the place where he knew he would find the crab,
arguing to himself thus:--"At any rate, the crab will make an excellent
supper to which I have every right; for after all, as I have before
remarked, business is business, and he will certainly be unable to
fulfil his obligations." The saucy crab, however, saw him coming along
with his mouth wide open ready to gobble him up, and shouted tauntingly
to him:--"Keep your bristles on, old prawn" and ran off after the whelk.
"Nothing really matters," thought he, "and as I feel a bit peckish I may
as well eat up friend whelk and the blue pointlet 'll come in for a
light breakfast in the morning." The cowardly whelk, reading the crab's
evil intention in his eyes offered him the baby oyster. "Thanks, old
flint," said the crab, "I'll have you first and the youngster another
time," and he pounced on the whelk and ate him right up. But as he was
crawling off in great comfort the old lobster overtook him and in no
time polished him off. The lobster, now too contented to move quickly,
was slowly returning to the water when up came the conger-eel who,
without any delay, proceeded to strangle him and then to gobble him up.
After her feast, the old girl, in her turn, felt drowsy. "I think," said
she, "I now deserve a nap," and she lay down in a pool and went fast
asleep. Presently the whale came along, having been hunting for the
conger all over the place. As soon as he caught sight of her he roared
in his wrath, "Is this what you call keeping your bargain?" and with one
gulp he bolted her,--head, fins, tail and all.
'Then, having accomplished his revenge, and at the same time satisfied
his appetite, his contentment was complete and he rolled over on his
side in the shallow water, and fell into a deep sleep.
'Now, thought I, is this not providential? Is there not here not merely
the evening meal I left my cave to seek, but many meals for my good wife
and children,--enough in fact to ward off hunger throughout the winter
that is now fast approaching. Taking up a great rock I hurled it with
all my force at the head of the whale and killed it on the spot. I now
proceeded to cut up the great creature and carry it, piece by piece, to
my cave, and that very night, when it was all safely stowed, we cooked
one great steak for supper, waking the children in order that they might
share the meal, and the remainder my good wife preserved in brine. Thus
in comfort we lived the winter through.
'The little oyster found its way back to its mother, and so grateful
were they both for my endeavours to help them, that they took up their
abode with us. Bertram grew to a fine chubby blue point. "Just like his
father," said the proud mother, and nothing reached our hearts so nearly
as his playful, charming ways.'
[Illustration: tailpiece]
[Illustration: vignette]
* * * * *
[Illustration: THE MUSICIAN]
[Illustration: headpiece]
THE MUSICIAN
Sometimes now the old King showed signs of weariness, and Bill bethought
him that a little music occasionally might soothe his nerves. So in the
very next town they came to he engaged the only musician in the place,
and very willing he was too to come along.
He played very wonderful music on his old concertina, often assisted
with his voice, and one evening, after a very beautiful performance, the
talented creature related the following story to his enchanted
hearers:--
'Right glad have I been, good fellows all, to join you in this your
noble enterprise to right our stout old brother of Troy here, and in
good time I trust that my great deeds shall prove my sincerity. But, in
the meantime, as supper hour draws on apace, and the frizzling cutlets
do scent the evening air, a little story should not be amiss to distract
your anxious minds, and thus to check the impatience of your appetite.
'Know then, my jovial birds, my cunning blades, that I am the eldest son
of that Prince of Polynesia who united the scattered kingdoms of this
unwieldy archipelago into one vast empire, over which he ruled with
even-handed justice and some common-sense until his death. Ah! lads, if
all had their rights I should at the present moment be seated on the
soft cushions of my father's throne, and maybe more able to be of help
to you than I am now; but you must take the will for the deed.
'My word! what a plump and healthy child was I, and withal as jolly and
as hearty as the day was long. Moreover, was not I the pride of the
empire and the envy of all the other kings and princes who had ever seen
or heard of me? Alas! who could have foretold that I was thus early in
life destined to have a real good taste of the troubles of this weary
world, and, though surrounded by every care and attention and the object
of the greatest affection that ever bubbled in the human heart, shortly
to become the victim of the meanest spite.
'But to proceed with the yarn--neither care nor expense was spared in my
upbringing, to which possibly more thought was devoted than even to the
education of our very well-educated and trustworthy friend, the buxom
Sicilian char-woman. At all events, the most certificated nurses
procurable were continually being engaged, but apparently only to be
dismissed again, for, almost perfect as most of them were, I can assure
you that, in the course of a very little time they were certain, of
course, to reveal (as was only natural) some slight weakness, and I ask
you, good comrades all, which of us is without 'em? This overcarefulness
on the part of my good parents was to be the cause of the disaster that
was soon entirely to change the trend of my life.
'It came about in this way. One of the discharged nurses, indignant at
what, with some show of reason, she considered an injustice to herself
(she had been dismissed for curling my hair only a little to the right
instead of quite to the right), resolved to revenge herself on her late
master and mistress, in such a manner as should be most likely to leave
them wretched for the remainder of their lives. Knowing the
overextravagance of their affection for me, she cruelly determined to
strike them in this, their weakest spot. One dark night, after cleverly
evading the ever-wakeful guards, she crept into my father's palace.
Stealing up the main staircase without attracting observation, she
arrived at the now empty throne-room, which she stealthily traversed,
keeping all the while close to the wall. She then passed through the
little door at the left of the grand throne and found herself in the
billiard-room. She had not, however, taken two steps therein when a
fearful panic seized her, for what should she behold but the stout form
of my rare old dad the emperor leaning over the table, apparently in the
act of making a brilliant stroke. A few seconds' consideration, however,
served to convince the vengeful creature that he was fast asleep.
Gnashing her teeth at the old gentleman, she hurried across the room and
entered the library, in which my good mother was seated, reading. But so
absorbed was the good lady in her book that she took no notice whatever
of the agile intruder, as she entered by one door and swiftly left by
the other. She now successively passed through the state ball-room, the
music-room, the third best drawing-room, the second best ball-room, and
the state bed-room, and mounting the back stairs, came to the suite of
rooms occupied by the nurses, and eventually reached the nurses'
dining-hall, into which my nursery led, without having excited any one's
observation.
'Opening my door very quietly, she peeped in. All was dark inside except
for the glimmer of a night-light which shone on the frilling of my
cradle and on the form of the nurse then in office, who had fallen
asleep over her supper of stewed apples. Creeping in quietly, the
evil-minded woman lifted my sleeping form from the cradle, so gently
that she did not awaken me, and, holding me closely to her, once more
successfully passed through all the apartments she had already
traversed, without arousing any suspicion, and at length found herself
again in the open air.
'Without losing a moment, she now made off to the woods, and after
wandering in these for some time, she met an old witch with whom, no
doubt, she had an appointment. Seated on the grass, the two women
haggled and haggled, and at last the treacherous nurse sold me to the
witch for three cocoanuts, and then went on her way and out of my life
for ever.
'Now it happened that the old witch lived in the hollow trunk of a tree
with her foster son, a tiny gnome named Orpheus, as quaint a little
object as ever I set eyes on, who played incessantly and most
beautifully on an old concertina, the very one, in fact, which I now
carry with me. The little fellow had been found some years before by the
old witch wandering near the ruins of an old temple in the very middle
of the wood. To whom he belonged, and whence he had come, no one
knew,--not even he himself, perhaps. However, the old girl adopted him,
and now nothing could exceed the motherly affection with which she
regarded this dry and shrivelled-up little chap,--unless, indeed, it was
the ardour with which the grateful gnome returned it. In fact, I learned
some time afterwards that the old witch had purchased me solely that I
might be a companion for this rum little person.
[Illustration: SHE NOW MADE OFF TO THE WOODS]
'The old girl, weird as was her general appearance, did all she could to
make me comfortable,--in fact far more than an ordinary witch would have
dreamt of doing,--and in recognition of her well-intentioned attitude
towards myself, I encouraged the spark of friendliness I began to feel
for her. But for her darling son, as soon as I grew accustomed to his
quaint appearance, and realised his kindness of heart and friendly
disposition towards myself, I conceived a great affection. He would
climb to the topmost branches of our tree, to practise his exercises
every morning, in order that I should not be worried with melancholy
repetitions, and, when perfected in some melody, who shall describe the
unaffected joy with which he would come down and play it for my delight?
How often in the moonlight (I lying on the grass at his side) would he
play over and over again to me some melancholy air, while our
foster-mother, mayhap, would be sweeping the dead leaves from our abode,
and preparing it for our night's repose.
[Illustration: HE WOULD CLIMB TO THE TOPMOST BRANCHES]
'Not I alone was gratified and enchanted by his dulcet tones, for all
the creatures of the woodland drew near and listened as night gradually
covered the sky, and he played through his evening pieces.
[Illustration: And played it for my delight]