GIVEN BY MEN. A man giving a theatre or
opera party should secure one or more
chaperones if women are to be present.
CALLS. The host should call upon his guests
within three days or a week after the event.
CARRIAGES. The host may, if he choose, send
carriages or a stage to collect all the guests.
This is a formal and agreeable way to begin
the evening's pleasure. The chaperone
should be called for first. A more informal
way is quite popular. The invitations having
been given and accepted, the host informs
each of his guests as to the others, and leaves
a ticket with each one. All then meet
informally at the place of amusement. If a
dinner is given before the entertainment,
carriages are provided to convey the guests
to the theatre.
CHAPERONE. A chaperone should always be
present if women are to be members of the
party. And if a stage or carriage calls for
the guests, it should call first for the
chaperone.
The chaperone who acts as hostess should
decide the hour to close the festivities.
DINNERS. If a dinner is given before the performance,
it is generally given at six o'clock,
the usual customs being followed. If preferred,
the dinner may follow the performance,
and may be given at any fashionable
restaurant or hotel. If it is given before the
play, at its termination the guests are conveyed
in carriages or stage to the theatre at
the expense of the host.
After the entertainment it is a good plan
for the party to return to the banqueting-room
to partake of slight refreshments.
DRESS. Men wear evening dress. Women wear
full evening dress.
INVITATIONS. He may invite his guests in person
or by note. In either case he should secure
the parents' permission to allow the
young women to attend, and should be ready
to supply all information regarding the men
who will be present, and also the chaperones.
MEN. The escorts should see the women home
unless they are called for by the male members
of their families, in which case they may
be accompanied to their conveyances. If a
young woman is called for by her maid in a
carriage, her escort may take her home.
Intimacy of the parties largely regulates
the etiquette of such occasions. They can
decide whether evening or street dress shall
be worn, and seat themselves accordingly.
A carriage should be provided.
When entering an opera or theatre box for
a short call, a man should stand and bow,
making some pleasant remark to the chaperone.
If there is an empty chair, he may sit
and talk a few minutes and retire as others
enter.
WOMEN. Between the acts it is perfectly proper
to go into the foyer with the escort, who
should carry the woman's wraps and see that
all her wants are attended to. Should she
desire anything, she should call on him first.
The hat or bonnet should be removed.
In a box the women occupy the front row
while the men sit or stand in the rear.
A woman should avoid conspicuous
manners, loud conversation, laughing, or acting
in any way to attract attention.
GIVEN BY WOMEN. This is a popular form of entertainment
during the season. They are
given by married women, and the guests are
invited by note. A dinner is given at the
house or at a restaurant before the departure
for the opera or play. Refreshments
may also be given after the entertainment at
either the house or restaurant. At the dinner
the same ceremonies are followed as to
arrangements of guests and escorts as at any
formal dinner.
TOASTS--WEDDINGS. Toasts to the bride and groom
are customary at the wedding breakfast or
supper.
If the groom gives a farewell bachelor dinner,
he should propose a toast to the bride.
THEATRE PARTIES. See also CHAPERONE-MEN.
CHAPERONE-THEATRE.
THIRD PERSON-USED IN CORRESPONDENCE. While it
was formerly the correct usage to begin
formal communications in the third person, it
is now the custom to begin such letters: MY
DEAR MRS SMITH, or MADAM.
The third person would be used only in
writing to a workman, a strange servant, or
a business firm.
TIN WEDDING. After ten years of marriage, occurs
the tin wedding. The invitations sent out
may have the words: NO PRESENTS RECEIVED.
Congratulations may be extended in accepting
or declining the invitation.
Every conceivable device made of tin is
appropriate as a gift, but, as these are limited,
ingenuity may be displayed in getting up
oddities. An entertainment may follow.
TIPPING.
At balls. It is not customary to tip the servants
at a private ball, but at a public one
it is usual to give a tip to the attendant at
the cloak-room.
At christenings. The father usually gives
the nurse at a christening a sum of money,
and the mother gives her some article of
dress or piece of jewelry.
At house; parties. See HOUSE PARTIES. GUESTS.
TIPPING SERVANTS. Also under names of
servants--as, COACHMAN.
TITLES.
MEN'S CARDS. Men having titles use them before
their names--as, REVEREND, REV. MR.,
REV. DR., Army and Navy titles, and
officers on the retired list.
LL.D. and all professional titles are placed
after the name. Political and judicial titles
are always omitted.
Physicians may use DR. before or M.D.
after their names. On cards intended for
social use, office hours and other professional
matters are omitted.
WOMEN'S CARDS. The same principles govern
the titles on women's cards, with the addition
that women should never use titles of their
husbands.
TOOTHPICKS should not be used in public. If necessity
requires it, raise the napkin over the
mouth, with the hand behind it, using the
toothpick as quickly as possible.
TOWN, RETURNING TO-WOMEN. Cards of the entire
family should be sent by mail to all acquaintances
when returning after a prolonged
absence.
When using cards, if out of town, the
place of a woman's permanent residence can
be written on the card thus: NEW YORK.
PHILADELPHIA.
TRAVELERS' VISITING-CARDS. A woman visiting a place
for a length of time should mail to her friends
a visiting-card containing her temporary address.
A man in a similar situation should call
upon his friends, and if he does not find
them at home should leave his card.