BRIDESMAIDS. See BRIDESMAIDS--CALLS.
CHAPERONES. See CHAPERONES--MEN CALLING.
BUSINESS. A business man may call in street
dress upon a woman before six o'clock.
Social visits may be made in the same
manner.
DAYS AT HOME. Calls should only be made on
the regular "At Home" days, and the
hostess should always be present on that day.
Very intimate friends may set aside this rule.
DEBUTANTE. See DEBUTANTE--CALLS.
DRESS. When making an afternoon call, a man
would wear afternoon dress, and evening
dress in making an evening call.
HIGH TEA. See HIGH TEA--CALLS.
HOURS. When no special day for receiving is
indicated, calls may be made at any proper
hour, according to the custom of the locality.
Men of leisure may call at the fashionable
hours from two till five in the afternoon, while
business and professional men may call between
eight and nine in the evening, as their
obligations prevent them from observing the
fashionable hours.
LENGTH. A formal call may last from fifteen to
thirty minutes. Old friends may stay longer.
LUNCHEONS. See LUNCHEON--CALLS.
MEN. AFTER ENTERTAINMENTS. After an entertainment
a man should call in person on
host and hostess, whether the invitation was
accepted or not. If a card is sent or mailed,
it should be accompanied with an apology.
To call on an acquaintance in an opera
box does not relieve one of the duty of making
a formal call in return for social favors.
When calling on the hostess but not on
the host, a man should leave a card for him.
If the hostess be out, he should leave two
cards.
Married men can return their social obligations
to women by personal calls, or the
women of the family can leave the men's
cards with their own.
A call should be made the day following a
luncheon or a breakfast; the same after a
dinner, or at least within a week. A call
should be made within a week after a ball.
After a theatre party given by a man, he
should call within three days on the woman
he escorted, or leave his card, and should
call within a week on the remainder of his
guests.
MEN CALLING ON MEN. At the beginning of
the season it is usual to leave a card for each
member of a family called on--one card for
husband, wife, "misses," and guest, or rest
of the family. Sometimes two cards answer
the purpose.
They may be sent by mail or messenger.
MEN CALLING ON WOMEN. A man should call
only on "At Home" days, especially when
making the first call, unless specially invited.
He should call at the hour appointed.
When no special day for receiving is indicated,
calls may be made at any proper hour,
according to the custom of the locality. Men
of leisure may call at the fashionable hours
--from two till five o'clock.
Business and professional men may call
between eight and nine o'clock, as their obligations
prevent them from observing the
fashionable hours.
A business man may call in street dress
before six o'clock, and the same dress in the
evening, if intimately acquainted.
Informal calls may be made on Sunday
after three o'clock by business and professional
men, provided there are no religious or
other scruples on the part of those receiving
the calls.
Evening or other than mere formal calls
should not be made, save by special invitation.
The first call should last not longer than
ten or fifteen minutes. It is correct to ask
for all the women of the family.
At the first call he should give his card at
the door. At following calls it is optional
whether to give a card or merely the name,
asking at the same time for the person one
desires to see. When the servant's intelligence
seems doubtful, or the name is an
unusual one, it is safer to give a card.
When a woman invites a man to call without
specifying when, it is not considered as
an invitation at all, but merely as a formal
courtesy.
It is bad form to solicit by innuendo or
otherwise an invitation to call from a woman.
It is her privilege to make the first move in
such matters; otherwise she would be placed
in an embarrassing position.
When an invitation specifies the hour,
every effort should be made to be punctual.
It is impolite to be too early or too late.
At a formal call, when others are present,
a man should not be seated unless invited to
do so. He should leave as others come in,
and not remain longer than ten or fifteen
minutes.
A man having a card or letter of introduction
to a young woman should present it in
person to the chaperone. If she is out, he
should mail it to her, and she should at once
notify him whether he may call.
If a caller is a stranger to the young
woman's hostess, he should send his card to
the latter and ask to see her.
The chaperone may, if desirable, give a
man permission to call upon the woman
under her charge.
A man should not call upon an unmarried
woman until invited by her to do so. He
may ask a married woman who has a family
for permission to call.
GLOVES. Gloves need not be removed at a formal
or brief call.
ENTERTAINMENTS. At entertainments a man
should give his card to the servant at the
door or leave it in the hall.
A few appropriate words of greeting should
be addressed to the hostess and host as soon
after entering as possible.
Personal introductions are not absolutely
required at musicales, teas, "At Homes," etc.
One may converse with those nearest, but
this does not warrant future recognition.
When light repasts are served, as teas, ices,
etc, a man should put his napkin on his
knee and hold the plate in his hand.
He should depart with as little ceremony
as possible--a bow and a smile, if host and
hostess are engaged, are sufficient. He
should not shake hands and try to speak unless
it can be done without becoming conspicuous.
MEN CALLING ON WOMEN--HAT. A man making
a formal or brief call should carry his
hat in his hand into the parlor.
SHAKING HANDS. A man should not offer to
shake hands first, as that is the privilege of
the women.
MEN--DRESS. In making ceremonious calls, men
wear afternoon dress, and after six o'clock
evening dress.
See also AFTERNOON DRESS--MEN. EVENING
DRESS--MEN.
PALL-BEARERS. See PALL-BEARERS--CALLS.
THEATRE. See THEATRE--CALLS.
USHERS. See USHERS--CALLS.
WEDDING INVITATIONS. Very intimate friends
can call personally. Friends of the groom
who have no acquaintance with the bride's
family should send their cards to those inviting
them.
Those who do not receive wedding invitations,
announcement, or "At Home" cards
should not call on the married couple, but
consider themselves as dropped from their
circle of acquaintance.
WOMEN RECEIVING AND INVITING MEN. The
invitation to call should be extended by the
woman, and if she does not specify the time,
will naturally be considered as an act of
courtesy, but not as an invitation.
These invitations should be given with great
care by young women. It is better to have
the invitation extended by her mother or
chaperone.
A married woman may ask a man to call,
especially if she have unmarried daughters.
An afternoon tea is an appropriate time to
specify. A man may ask a married woman
who has a family for permission to call.
At the beginning of a season, a man who
desires the further acquaintance of a woman
should leave his card in person for all the
members of the family.
A formal call, or the first call of the season,
should, mot last longer than ten or fifteen
minutes. It is proper for the man to inquire
for all the women of the family.
A man should call only on "At Home"
days, unless especially invited to come at
other times. The hostess should be home on
all "At Home" days, unless sickness or
other good cause prevents.
In the absence of "At Home" days, or
specified time, calls may be received at any
proper hour, according to the locality of the
place.
When men make a formal call at other than
specified time, the hostess may justly excuse
herself. The caller would have no ground
for offense.
Intimate friends need not hold to formal
hours for paying calls.
Men of leisure should call only at fashionable
hours--from two to five in the afternoon.
Evening calls should not be made by other
than business or professional men, unless the
acquaintance be an intimate one, or unless
they are specially invited.
Business and professional men may call between
eight and nine o'clock, as their obligations
prevent them from observing the fashionable
hours.
Informal calls may be made on Sunday
after three o'clock by business and professional
men, provided there are no religious or other
scruples on the part of those receiving the
calls.
A business man may call in street dress
before six o'clock in the evening, or thereafter
if intimacy warrants.
Evening, or other than mere formal calls,
should not be made, save by special invitation.
A man should leave his card when calling.
If his hostess is married, he should leave
one also for the host. If she is out, he
should leave two.
When calling upon a young woman whose
hostess is not known to the man, he should
send his card to her.
If the woman is seated when a man enters
the room, she rises to greet him, and, if
she wishes, shakes hands. It is her option
to shake hands or not, and she should make
the first advances. It is bad form for him
to do so.
During a formal call, when other guests
are present, a man should remain standing
and depart upon the entrance of others. If
the hostess is seated at the time, she need not
rise or shake hands, but merely bow.
The hostess should not accompany a caller
to the door of the parlor, but bow from her
chair.
Dropping in at a theatre or opera party
does not relieve a man from making formal
calls that may be due.
A woman's escort to a theatre party should
call upon her within a week. If she were
his guest, he should do so within three days,
or send his card, with an apology.
Business calls are privileged, and can be
made when convenient, although preferably
by appointment.
WOMEN RECEIVING--INTRODUCTIONS. At formal
calls conversation should be general among
the guests. Introductions are unnecessary.
AFTERNOON. See AFTERNOON CALLS.
COUNTRY. See COUNTRY CALLS.
EVENING. See EVENING CALLS.
FIRST. See FIRST CALLS.
INVALID'S. See INVALID'S CALLS.
SUNDAY. See SUNDAY CALLS.
CANCELING DINNERS. When it becomes necessary for
a hostess to cancel or postpone a dinner, she
should send as soon as possible, either by
special delivery or messenger, a letter to each
guest who has accepted the invitation. The
letter, written either in the first or third person,
should state the reason and express
regrets.
CANCELING WEDDINGS. See WEDDINGS-INVITATIONS
RECALLED.
CANES. A cane is the correct thing for a man when
walking, except when engaged in business.
It should be held a few inches below the
knob, ferrule down, and should, like umbrellas,
be carried vertically.
CALLING. When making a formal or brief call
the cane should be left in the hall.
CARDINAL-HOW ADDRESSED. A letter, official or
social, begins: Your Eminence, and ends: I
have the honor to remain your humble servant.
The address on the envelope is: His Eminence
Cardinal Wilson.