(_BY A CONFUSED CITIZEN._)
What a state we'll soon be in!
Such a clamour, such a din,
Raised from Kew to Dalston,
Cork to Cromer, Wight to Wick!
Seeking votes through thin and thick,
GLADSBURY and SALSTONE!
Talk and chatter, speech and cry!
Some assert, then some deny
In a near or far shire;
Call each other names and laugh,
Jeer and chuckle, joke and chaff--
DEVONCOURT and HARSHIRE!
Still they come and still they go;
Up and down, and high and low,
Many more than those four.
Speak in Council, speak in House,
Think not yet of golf or grouse,
BALBERY and ROSEFOUR.
Rush and canvass up and down,
Village, hamlet, city, town,
Stately street or poor lane;
Start committees, advertise,
Think of rousing party cries,
CHAMBERLEY and MORLAIN!
Such a fidget, such a fuss!
There is no escape for us;
We shall have it shortly.
How I wish that both would go
Off to Bath or Jericho,
SALFOURLAIN, GLADCOURTLEY!
* * * * *
"Cave Kanem!"--"If," Dr. KANE is reported to have said at the Ulster
Appeal Meeting in St. James's Hall, last Wednesday, "If they (the
Ulster Irishmen) had to choose between arbitrary oppression and an
appeal for justice to the God of battles, he (Dr. KANE) had no more
doubt than he had about his existence, that that appeal would be made,
and that God would defend the right." With the saving clause adroitly
introduced into the last sentence, everyone, except an Atheist, will
agree; and, but for this, this speech reads as an incentive to Civil
War, intended to stir up brother against brother to fight to the
death. Such sentiments may, in the future, be remembered as marked
with "the brand of KANE."
* * * * *
A Difficulty.--_Mr. Dick_ was unable to keep, "King Charles the
First's head" out of his literary work. So Our OSCAR, it is said, has
been unable to keep the head of St. John the Baptist out of his play,
_Salomé_, accepted by SARAH. Hence difficulty with licenser. The real
truth, we believe, is that the head, according to received tradition,
should be brought in by _Salomé_ "on a charger," and SARAH protests
against this, as she is not an equestrian.
* * * * *
A New Songstress.--Mr. CUSINS, on Wednesday last, accompanying
SCHUMANN, RUBINSTEIN, & Co., may fairly be described as "CUSINS
German." A very successful Concert, musically notable, among many
notable things, for the _début_ of Miss GWLADYS WOOD, who, being
vociferously encored, gave a Tyrolean Volkslied, or "VOKES' Family"
dance and song, playing the accompaniment herself. "She ought to do
well."--I quote SHAKESPEARE, WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE, the Musician, who
sang a _duo_ with Mme. VALDA. The Concert commenced with a "Septette
(By DESIRE)." This is a new Composer.
* * * * *
[Illustration: The Beadle with the German Reeds' Staff.]
An Afternoon with Those who "Entertain" More than Anyone in
London.--"_Charity Begins At Home_" or rather it begins at the GERMAN
REEDS,' _after_ CORNEY GRAIN has finished his amusing "Vocal Recital."
Then it is that never-failing Charity begins, and goes as well as
ever. ALFRED REED is immensely funny, especially when disguised as a
Charity Girl. On no account miss the Grain of Chaff's capital French
version of CHEVALIER's Coster song about "_'Arry 'Awkins_." It's
lovely! Excellent entertainment for everybody at St. George's Hall.
* * * * *
Doctor O'Letters.--_July 6th_.--Not "D.C.L." but "honorary degree of
Doctor of Letters," is to be conferred by Dublin University on HENRY
IRVING, for masterly management of vast correspondence. Let Oxford
follow suit with a "Postmastership of Merton." Dr. L. O'TOOLE says,
"I'm satisfied with 'L.L.L. Three Stars,' and plenty of it."
* * * * *