SCENE--_Author at his desk, with Newspaper Cuttings before
him_.
_Author._
"The Critics' comments I'll peruse,
And I will profit by;
I'll find out what they most abuse,
And strive to rectify!"
_First Critic._
"His work unequal as we read,
We think upon the whole
This author almost would succeed
If nearer to his goal."
_Second Critic._
"His serious pages suit us well,
Revealing thought and heart;
But he is quite unbearable
When trying to be smart!"
_Third Critic._
"Some sprightly pages from his pen
With pleasure we have read;
But if he moralises, _then_
He's heavier than lead!"
_Fourth Critic._
"We by the eye of faith can see--
It isn't from his books--
He is not such a fool as he
Invariably looks."
_Fifth Critic._
"This author's pages needs must thrill
A sympathetic mind,--
Of subtle knowledge, tender skill,
Deep pathos, wit refined."
_Sixth Critic._
"A mass of folly more intense
Experience can't recall.
We tried to find one shred of sense.
_There is not one at all!_"
[_Exit Author, tearing his hair._
* * * * *