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[Illustration: AN ANXIETY.
_Aunty._ "WHY, LAURIE, YOU SEEM TO BE GROWING EVERY DAY!"
_Laurie_ (_whose one idea is his Birthday next week_). "YES, AUNTY;
I'M AFRAID I SHALL BE SIX BEFORE MY BIRTHDAY!"]
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VICARIOUS WHIPPING.--Why are Railway Chairmen and Directors like JAMES
THE FIRST when he was a boy? Because, according to received tradition,
His Majesty, _in statu pupillari_, was provided with another boy, who,
whenever JEMMY deserved the rod, had to be flogged, as a substitute,
in the Royal youth's place; and the Railway Authorities are allowed
similar substitutes, namely, signalmen, engineers, and other
subordinates, against whom, when fatal accidents happen by their
superiors' fault, Coroners' Juries usually return verdicts of
manslaughter.
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DESCRIPTION OF AN ASSASSIN.--"A Man who takes life seriously." N.B.--I
never like hearing a Medical Man so described in ordinary conversation.
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[Illustration: "LET SLEEPING DOGS LIE."]
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