VISITOR--"Oh, that's all right. I only want to sell him another
car."--_Judge_.
"That fellow is too slick for me. Sold me a lot that was two feet under
water. I went around to demand my money back."
"Get it?"
"Get nothing! Then he sold me a second-hand gasoline launch and a copy
of 'Venetian Life,' by W.D. Howells."
In a small South Carolina town that was "finished" before the war, two
men were playing checkers in the back of a store. A traveling man who
was making his first trip to the town was watching the game, and, not
being acquainted with the business methods of the citizens, he called
the attention of the owner of the store to some customers who had just
entered the front door.
"Sh! Sh!" answered the storekeeper, making another move on the
checkerboard. "Keep perfectly quiet and they'll go out."
He who finds he has something to sell,
And goes and whispers it down a well,
Is not so apt to collar the dollars,
As he who climbs a tree and hollers.
--_The Advertiser_