Archbishop Whately was one day asked if he rose early. He replied that
once he did, but he was so proud all the morning and so sleepy all the
afternoon that he determined never to do it again.
A man who has an office downtown called his wife by telephone the other
morning and during the conversation asked what the baby was doing.
"She was crying her eyes out," replied the mother.
"What about?"
"I don't know whether it is because she has eaten too many strawberries
or because she wants more," replied the discouraged mother.
BANKS--"I had a new experience yesterday, one you might call
unaccountable. I ate a hearty dinner, finishing up with a Welsh rabbit,
a mince pie and some lobster à la Newburgh. Then I went to a place of
amusement. I had hardly entered the building before everything swam
before me."