BILLS

The proverb, "Where there's a will there's a way" is now revised to

"When there's a bill we're away."

YOUNG DOCTOR--"Why do you always ask your patients what they have for

dinner?"

OLD DOCTOR--"It's a most important question, for according to their

menus I make out my bills."

Farmer Gray kept summer boarders. One of these, a schoolteacher, hired

him to drive her to the various points of interest around the country.

He pointed out this one and that, at the same time giving such items of

information as he possessed.

The school-teacher, pursing her lips, remarked, "It will not be

necessary for you to talk."

When her bill was presented, there was a five-dollar charge marked

"Extra."

"What is this?" she asked, pointing to the item.

"That," replied the farmer, "is for sass. I don't often take it, but

when I do I charge for it."--_E. Egbert_.

Toaster's Handbook: Jokes, Stories, and Quotations · 第 121 / 1074 题