(_Upon an Ordinarily Innocent and Non-punning Fire-worshipper_).
Oh! _what_ a period! Strikes might puzzle SOLON!
I love, in winter--having shut up shop--
My snug back-parlour fire to _semi-colon_,
Now there's no _colon_, fuel's at a _full-stop!_
I have burned coke, wood, turf, aye, even slate,
But to _no_ fire myself cannot a-comma-date!
* * * * *
"PRACTICAL JOHN."--Mr. HOLLINGSHEAD'S advertisement, headed "Plain
Words to the Public," is eminently characteristic of the author. Says
he, "The prices I start with I shall stand or fall by." Certainly,
as the prices are moderate, the public will stand them, so he needn't
trouble himself on that score. If he be riding for a fall, and if the
public won't come down heavily, let us hope, if he fall at all, he
will come down lightly. Then he adds, in his own independent way,
"If it is thought necessary to tamper with these prices in an upward
direction" ["tampering upward" is pretty], "I shall give up this,
my final effort in theatrical management" [Oh, no, don't!--please
don't!!], "and walk out of the building." Why "walk"? By his own free
admission he will be driven out (which sounds like a contradiction in
terms), so why make a virtue of walking out. Never walk when you can
ride. But J. H. walk out!! "_J. H. y suis et J. H. y reste._"
* * * * *