THE SOUND OF MARRIAGE BELLS.
I came home one day more dispirited than usual. I had found Mrs. Le
Grande weaker than ever, and yet she was clinging tenaciously to life,
and had that morning dictated an order to her dress-maker in New York for
a most elaborate costume. When I tried to urge her to think of something
more enduring than the raiment whose fashion and beauty soon changes, she
forbade me mentioning such a thing again in her presence, nor would she
listen to the Scripture reading on which I always insisted as the one
condition on which I would read to her at all. I knew my own words were
powerless to break the crust of worldliness and selfishness that bound
her heart, but I hoped God's word might pierce it. Hubert had returned
from college a few days before, and just as I entered the oak avenue from
the little footpath through the wood, I met him cantering along on Faery.
"A stranger has just arrived whom you will be surprised to see," he
called to me.
"Any one I know?" I asked carelessly.
"I should say it was; and one whom you will be glad to see, if I am not
mistaken."
"Won't you tell me who it is and so prolong my pleasure, for I am not
going direct to the house. I intend taking a stroll through the garden to
try and get some unhappy fancies brushed away by the blossoms."
"Anticipation is said to exceed realization, so I will generously leave
you the former," he said, giving Faery the whip and cantering rapidly
away.
I did not find the flowers such comforters as I hoped, and soon entered
the house, no doubt slightly impelled thereto by a natural curiosity as
well. I glanced into the drawing-room and parlors as I passed along the
hall and began to think Hubert was merely subjecting me to one of his
practical jokes, as I could see no sign of visitors anywhere, and I
concluded to go to the library and try for a while to forget myself and
heartaches in an hour's hard reading. I found the door ajar and when I
entered the room was surprised to find the curtains drawn, and the room
flooded with the June sunshine. I turned to the study-table to see who
might be taking such liberties in the master's absence when there,
standing with his back to me stood Mr. Winthrop himself. He turned
suddenly and saw me. "Ah, little one, have you come to speak to me?"
"I did not know you were here; but I am very glad to speak to you--to
welcome you home," I said, giving him my hand.
"You seem like one come back to me from the dead," he said, soberly,
still holding my hand.
"I am not sure if it was not you who held me back from those shining
gates."
"What do you mean?"
"When you held my hand through that long night, I thought but for your
firm grasp I should drift out of reach of life altogether."
"I tried to pray that night, Medoline, as I had never done before; I
believe my prayers were answered."
"Then you have found that the Bible is true?" I asked, looking up eagerly
into his face.
"Yes, every day more clearly."
"Then it was well worth all the weariness and pain I endured to have you
say this; but have you fully forgiven me, Mr. Winthrop, and may we take
up our friendship as before?"
"Must we take it up as before, Medoline? I have found I cannot be
satisfied with your friendship only?"
"I do not understand you."
"You drove me away, and you have forced me to return--must I leave again?
I cannot remain near you any longer with our relation to each other
unchanged. I must have your love or nothing. Friendship between us, and
nothing more, is out of the question. Can you not learn to love me,
Medoline?"
I turned and placed both my hands in his.
"Does this mean love instead of fear? Remember you told me not long ago
you were afraid of me; answer me truly, little one; do hand and heart go
together?"
"If you care to have them," I murmured softly, "but, have you forgotten
Mrs. Le Grande?"
"Long ago I ceased to think of her, only as one may remember a brief
surrender to an ignoble passion. The mistake I made was in measuring
womanhood generally by her standard--you have taught me, my darling, that
angels have not yet ceased to visit our poor earth."
"Oh, Mr. Winthrop, you must not go to the other extreme or I shall soon
disappoint you."
"You are all I could wish, Medoline. If it were possible I would not ask
any change in mind or body, my Eve--fresh from the hand of God."
His words frightened me; for how could I ever fulfill his expectations?
He read my face.
"Are you sure, Medoline, you love me as I want to be loved by my wife?
Have you gained your woman's heart with its full capacity for love or
suffering, or are you still only a child?"
"I could die for you, Mr. Winthrop, if it were for your good; I do not
ask for anything better than to be near you always in time and eternity."
"Since how long have you regarded me in this way, Medoline?"
"You remember that long night holding my hand, when I was at the worst of
the fever? I saw everything clearly then. My spirit seemed to get away
from the body, or very nearly so, and looked on things as it had never
done before."
"Did you wonder after that why I left you so abruptly?"
"For a long time I thought you were still at Oaklands. Every day I used
to hope you might come, or send me a message."
"You shall never be so left again till death separates us."
"If you cared for me then, why did you leave me?" I asked timidly.
"If I cared for you then, Medoline! Why don't you ask me when first I
began to love you?"
"I did not think to ask."
"Do you remember that day in the autumn when you had the Mill Road people
here?"
"Yes."
"You came to me, if you remember, with the widow Larkum's baby in your
arms, a very timid, and beseeching look on your face at the same time."
I nodded in reply.
"My heart went out to you then and there, as it never did to any woman.
I had been fascinated and amused with your ways before that. How I have
waited and hoped since then to see you turn to me with the love-light in
your eyes! Fear lest I might lose my self-restraint and speak too soon,
drove me from you--fear lest some other man would win what I so
passionately craved has brought me back. Darling, you have made this
the happiest day of my life."