[Footnote 1: In the first issue this is numbered by mistake 156. The
wrong numbering is continued to No. 163, when two successive papers are
numbered 163; there is no 164, and then two papers are numbered 165.
After this, at 166 the numbering falls right.]
* * * * *
No. 156. Wednesday, August 29, 1711. Steele.
'... Sed tu simul obligasti
Perfidum votis caput, enitescis
Pulchrior multo ...'
Hor.
I do not think any thing could make a pleasanter Entertainment, than the
History of the reigning Favourites among the Women from Time to Time
about this Town: In such an Account we ought to have a faithful
Confession of each Lady for what she liked such and such a Man, and he
ought to tell us by what particular Action or Dress he believed he
should be most successful. As for my part, I have always made as easy a
Judgment when a Man dresses for the Ladies, as when he is equipped for
Hunting or Coursing. The Woman's Man is a Person in his Air and
Behaviour quite different from the rest of our Species: His Garb is more
loose and negligent, his Manner more soft and indolent; that is to say,
in both these Cases there is an apparent Endeavour to appear unconcerned
and careless. In catching Birds the Fowlers have a Method of imitating
their Voices to bring them to the Snare; and your Women's Men have
always a Similitude of the Creature they hope to betray, in their own
Conversation. A Woman's Man is very knowing in all that passes from one
Family to another, has little pretty Officiousnesses, is not at a loss
what is good for a Cold, and it is not amiss if he has a Bottle of
Spirits in his Pocket in case of any sudden Indisposition.
Curiosity having been my prevailing Passion, and indeed the sole
Entertainment of my Life, I have sometimes made it my business to
examine the Course of Intreagues as well as the Manners and
Accomplishments of such as have been most successful that Way. In all my
Observation, I never knew a Man of good Understanding a general
Favourite; some Singularity in his Behaviour, some Whim in his Way of
Life, and what would have made him ridiculous among the Men, has
recommended him to the other Sex. I should be very sorry to offend a
People so fortunate as these of whom I am speaking; but let any one look
over the old Beaux, and he will find the Man of Success was remarkable
for quarrelling impertinently for their Sakes, for dressing unlike the
rest of the World, or passing his Days in an insipid Assiduity about the
Fair Sex, to gain the Figure he made amongst them. Add to this that he
must have the Reputation of being well with other Women, to please any
one Woman of Gallantry; for you are to know, that there is a mighty
Ambition among the light Part of the Sex to gain Slaves from the
Dominion of others. My Friend WILL. HONEYCOMB says it was a common Bite
with him to lay Suspicions that he was favoured by a Lady's Enemy, that
is some rival Beauty, to be well with herself. A little Spite is natural
to a great Beauty: and it is ordinary to snap up a disagreeable Fellow
lest another should have him. That impudent Toad _Bareface_ fares well
among all the Ladies he converses with, for no other Reason in the World
but that he has the Skill to keep them from Explanation one with
another. Did they know there is not one who likes him in her Heart, each
would declare her Scorn of him the next Moment; but he is well received
by them because it is the Fashion, and Opposition to each other brings
them insensibly into an Imitation of each other. What adds to him the
greatest Grace is, the pleasant Thief, as they call him, is the most
inconstant Creature living, has a wonderful deal of Wit and Humour, and
never wants something to say; besides all which, he has a most spiteful
dangerous Tongue if you should provoke him.
To make a Woman's Man, he must not be a Man of Sense, or a Fool; the
Business is to entertain, and it is much better to have a Faculty of
arguing, than a Capacity of judging right. But the pleasantest of all
the Womens Equipage are your regular Visitants; these are Volunteers in
their Service, without Hopes of Pay or Preferment; It is enough that
they can lead out from a publick Place, that they are admitted on a
publick Day, and can be allowed to pass away part of that heavy Load,
their Time, in the Company of the Fair. But commend me above all others
to those who are known for your Ruiners of Ladies; these are the
choicest Spirits which our Age produces. We have several of these
irresistible Gentlemen among us when the Company is in Town. These
Fellows are accomplished with the Knowledge of the ordinary Occurrences
about Court and Town, have that sort of good Breeding which is exclusive
of all Morality, and consists only in being publickly decent, privately
dissolute.
It is wonderful how far a fond Opinion of herself can carry a Woman, to
make her have the least Regard to a professed known Woman's Man: But as
scarce one of all the Women who are in the Tour of Gallantries ever
hears any thing of what is the common Sense of sober Minds, but are
entertained with a continual Round of Flatteries, they cannot be
Mistresses of themselves enough to make Arguments for their own Conduct
from the Behaviour of these Men to others. It is so far otherwise, that
a general Fame for Falshood in this kind, is a Recommendation: and the
Coxcomb, loaded with the Favours of many others, is received like a
Victor that disdains his Trophies, to be a Victim to the present
Charmer.
If you see a Man more full of Gesture than ordinary in a publick
Assembly, if loud upon no Occasion, if negligent of the Company round
him, and yet laying wait for destroying by that Negligence, you may take
it for granted that he has ruined many a Fair One. The Woman's Man
expresses himself wholly in that Motion which we call Strutting: An
elevated Chest, a pinched Hat, a measurable Step, and a sly surveying
Eye, are the Marks of him. Now and then you see a Gentleman with all
these Accomplishments; but alas, any one of them is enough to undo
Thousands: When a Gentleman with such Perfections adds to it suitable
Learning, there should be publick Warning of his Residence in Town, that
we may remove our Wives and Daughters. It happens sometimes that such a
fine Man has read all the Miscellany Poems, a few of our Comedies, and
has the Translation of _Ovid's_ Epistles by Heart. Oh if it were
possible that such a one could be as true as he is charming! but that is
too much, the Women will share such a dear false Man:
'A little Gallantry to hear him Talk one would indulge one's self in,
let him reckon the Sticks of one's Fan, say something of the _Cupids_
in it, and then call one so many soft Names which a Man of his
Learning has at his Fingers Ends. There sure is some Excuse for
Frailty, when attacked by such a Force against a weak Woman.'
Such is the Soliloquy of many a Lady one might name, at the sight of one
of these who makes it no Iniquity to go on from Day to Day in the Sin of
Woman-Slaughter.
It is certain that People are got into a Way of Affectation, with a
manner of overlooking the most solid Virtues, and admiring the most
trivial Excellencies. The Woman is so far from expecting to be contemned
for being a very injudicious silly Animal, that while she can preserve
her Features and her Mein, she knows she is still the Object of Desire;
and there is a sort of secret Ambition, from reading frivolous Books,
and keeping as frivolous Company, each side to be amiable in
Imperfection, and arrive at the Characters of the Dear Deceiver and the
Perjured Fair. [1]