Your devoted
ALFRED.
* * * * *
_Tuesday, 12 December, 1894._
My dear Lucie:
Will you be my interpreter to all the members of our two families, to
all who have been thoughtful of me at this time? Will you tell them how
much I have been touched by their good letters and by the sympathy they
have shown me?
I cannot answer them; for what could I tell them? My sufferings? They
understand them, and I do not like to complain. Besides that, my brain
reels, and my thoughts are at times confused. My soul alone remains
unshaken, as steadfast as on that awful day before the monstrous
accusation was thrown in my face. My whole being still revolts at the
thought of it.
But in the end the truth must be known in spite of everything. We are
not living in a century when the light can be hidden. It must be that
the whole truth will be known, that my voice will be heard throughout
the length and breadth of our dear France--just as my accusation has
been heard. It is not only my own honor which I have to defend; it is
the honor of all the corps of officers of which I am a part, and a
worthy part.
I have received the clothes that you sent me. If you should have a
chance, please send me my tippet. I do not need the pelisse. My tippet
is in the wardrobe in the antechamber.
Embrace our darlings tenderly for me. I wept over the good letter
written by our dear Pierrot. How long the time seems to me until I can
embrace him and you all once more!
A thousand kisses for yourself.
Your devoted
ALFRED.
* * * * *
_Thursday, 14 December, 1894._
My dear Lucie:
I have received your good letter; also new letters from the family.
Thank them all for me. All these proofs of affection and esteem touch me
more than I know how to tell you. As for me, I am always the same. When
a man’s conscience is pure and calm he can bear everything. I am
convinced that eventually the truth will be known; that the assurance of
my innocence will finally be borne in upon all minds.
At my trial I shall be judged by soldiers as loyal and as honest as
myself. They will recognize--I am sure of it--the error that has been
committed.
Error, unhappily, is a human thing. Who can say that he never has been
deceived?
I am happy over the good news you give me regarding the children. You
were right to begin to give P[ierrot] cod-liver oil; the time is
propitious. Kiss the little fellow for me. How I long to hold the dear
children in my arms!
I hope, with you, that they will end by letting me once more embrace
you. It will be one of the happiest days of my life; it will be a
consolation for all the pain I have endured.