G. Fox then, having in England been the first of the Quakers that
preached and proclaimed Christ the light, which enlighteneth every
man coming into the world, had in a short time, as we have seen in
this history, notwithstanding all opposition, many adherents, whereby
several others also began to publish that doctrine. And many of these
first preachers were like sons of thunder; for they testifying of the
light of Christ shining in the consciences of men, proclaimed, that
the day of the Lord was dawned and should yet further break forth,
to the destroying of the former buildings of human inventions and
institutions; though not of that which had formerly been felt and
enjoyed by true experience of the operations of the Spirit of God in
people’s hearts. By their powerful way of preaching repentance, many
were awakened out of the sleep of careless security, and came to see
that their covering was too short, and that they were not covered with
the true wedding garment: and many that had been of a rude life, came
to be so touched to the heart by these zealous preachers, that crying
out what shall we do to be saved? they were brought to repentance and
conversion; and so from wild and rough, came to be sedate and sober.
And as in the beginning many of these first preachers did run on like
a mighty stream, and seemed fit to thresh and grind mountains and
stones, and to hew down tall cedars, and wash away all opposition;
so there were others also, who as sons of consolation, proclaimed
glad tidings to the hungry and thirsty souls, many of which were in
England about that time, insomuch that some said, Now the everlasting
gospel is preached again. And it was indeed remarkable, that though
these promulgators of the doctrine of the inward light shining in the
hearts of men, were mean and illiterate, yet many people of note, not
only such as were in magistracy, but also many preachers of several
persuasions, were so touched at the heart by their lively preaching,
that they not only received their doctrine, but came themselves in
process of time, to be zealous publishers thereof, and thus a great
crop was gathered; nay sometimes even men of great skill, and sharp
wit, were deeply struck by plain and homely preaching; of whom,
Isaac Pennington, mentioned more than once in this history, was a
signal instance, as may appear from a relation concerning himself,
written with his own hand, and found among his papers after his death,
wherein he speaks as followeth:
‘I have been a man of sorrow and affliction from my childhood,
feeling the want of the Lord, and mourning after him; separated
by him from the love, nature and spirit of this world, and turned
in spirit towards him, almost ever since I could remember.
‘In this sense of my low estate, I sought after the Lord, I read
Scriptures, I watched over mine own heart, I cried unto the
Lord for what I felt the want of, I blessed his name in what he
mercifully did for me, and bestowed on me, &c. Whatever I read
in the Scriptures, as the way of God to my understanding, I gave
myself to the faithful practice of; being contented to meet with
all the reproach, opposition, and several kinds of sufferings,
which it pleased the Lord to measure out to me therein; and I
cannot but say, that the Lord was good unto me, did visit me,
did teach me, and help me, did testify his acceptance of me many
times, to the refreshing and joy of my heart before him.
‘But my soul was not satisfied with what I met with, nor indeed
could be, there being further quickenings and pressings in my
spirit, after a more full, certain, and satisfactory knowledge;
even after the sense, sight and enjoyment of God, as was
testified in the Scriptures to have been felt and enjoyed in the
former times; for I saw plainly, that there was a stop of the
streams, and a great falling short of the power, life, and glory,
which they partook of. We had not so the spirit, nor were so in
the faith, nor did so walk and live in God, as they did. They
were come to Mount Sion and the heavenly Jerusalem, &c. which we
had hardly so much as the literal knowledge or apprehension what
they were. So that I saw the whole course of religion among us,
was, for the most part, but a talk, to what they felt, enjoyed,
possessed, and lived in.
‘This sense made me sick at heart indeed, and set me upon deep
crying to God, close searching the Scriptures, and waiting on
God, that I might receive the pure sense and understanding of
them, from and in the light, and by the help of his Spirit. And
what the Lord did bestow on me in that state, with thankfulness
I remember before him at this very day: for he was then my God,
and a pitier and a watcher over; though he had not pleased then
to direct me, how to stay my mind upon him and abide with him.
And then I was led, (indeed I was led, I did not run of myself,)
into a way of separation from the worship of the world, into a
gathered society; for this both the Scripture and the Spirit
of God in me gave testimony unto; and what we then met with,
and what leadings and help we then felt, there is a remembrance
and testimony in my heart to this day. But there was somewhat
wanting, and we mistook our way, for whereas we should have
pressed forward into the spirit and power, we ran too much
outward into letter and form; and though the Lord in many things
helped us, yet therein he was against us, and brought darkness,
confusion, and scattering upon us. I was sorely broken and
darkened, and in this darkened state, sometimes lay still for a
long season, secretly mourning and crying out to the Lord night
and day; sometimes I ran about, hearkening after what might
appear or break forth in others, but never met with any thing,
whereto there was the least answer in my heart, save in one
people, who had a touch of truth; but I never expressed so much
to any of them, nor indeed felt them at all able to reach my
condition.
‘At last, after all my distresses, wanderings, and sore travails,
I met with some writings of this people called Quakers, which I
cast a slight eye upon and disdained, as falling very short of
that wisdom, light, life, and power, which I had been longing for
and searching after: I had likewise, some pretty distance of time
after this, opportunity of meeting with some of them, and divers
of them were by the Lord moved, (I know it to be so since,) to
come to me: as I remember at the very first they reached to the
life of God in me; which life answered their voice, and caused a
great love in me to spring to them; but still in my reasonings
with them, and disputes alone, in my mind, concerning them, I
was very far off from owning them, as so knowing the Lord, or so
appearing in his life and power as my condition needed, and as my
soul waited for. Yea, the more I conversed with them, the more I
seemed in my understanding and reason to get over them, and to
trample them under my feet, as a poor, weak, silly, contemptible
generation; who had some smatterings of truth in them, and some
honest desires towards God, but very far off from the clear and
full understanding of his way and will. And this was the effect
almost of every discourse with them, they still reached my heart,
and I felt them in the secrets of my soul, which caused the love
in me always to continue, yea sometimes to increase towards them;
but daily my understanding got more and more over them, and
therein I daily more and more despised them.
‘After a long time I was invited to hear one of them, (as I
had been often, they in tender love pitying me, and feeling my
want of that which they possessed,) and there was an answer
in my heart, and I went in fear and trembling, with desires to
the most High, who was over all, and knew all, that I might not
receive any thing for truth, which was not of him, nor withstand
any thing which was of him, but might bow before the appearance
of the Lord my God, and none other: and indeed, when I came, I
felt the presence and power of the most High among them: and
words of truth, from the spirit of truth, reaching to my heart
and conscience, opening my state as in the presence of the Lord.
Yea, I did not only feel words and demonstrations from without,
but I felt the dead quickened, the seed raised, insomuch as my
heart, in the certainty of light and clearness of true sense,
said, ‘This is he, this is he, there is no other; this is he
whom I have waited for and sought after from my childhood, who
was always near me, and had often begotten life in my heart,
but I knew him not distinctly, nor how to receive him, or dwell
with him.’ And then in this sense in the melting and breakings
of my spirit, was I given up to the Lord, to become his, both
in waiting for the further revealings of his seed in me, and to
serve him in the life and power of his seed.
‘Now what I met with after this, in my travails, in my waitings,
in my spiritual exercises, is not to be uttered; only in general
I may say this, I met with the very strength of hell. The cruel
oppressor roared upon me, and made me feel the bitterness of
his captivity, while he had any power; yea, the Lord was far
from my help, and from the voice of my roaring. I also met with
deep subtilties and devices to entangle me in that wisdom, which
seemeth able to make wise in the things of God; but indeed is
foolishness and a snare to the soul, bringing it back into
captivity, where the enemy’s gins prevail. And what I met with
outwardly from my own dear father, from my kindred, from my
servants, from the people and powers of the world, for no other
cause but fearing my God, worshipping him as he hath required
of me, and bowing to his seed, (which is his Son,) who is to
be worshipped by men and angels for evermore, the Lord my God
knoweth, before whom my heart and way are, who preserved me in
love to them, in the midst of all I suffered from them, and doth
still so preserve me, blessed be his pure and holy name.
‘But some may desire to know what I have at last met with: I
answer, ‘I have met with the seed.’ Understand that word, and
thou wilt be satisfied, and inquire no further. I have met with
my God, I have met with my Saviour; and he hath not been present
with me without his salvation; but I have felt the healing
drop upon my soul from under his wings. I have met with the
true knowledge, the knowledge of life, the living knowledge,
the knowledge which is life; and this hath had the true virtue
in it, which my soul hath rejoiced in, in the presence of the
Lord. I have met with the seed’s father, and in the seed I have
felt him my father; there I have read his nature, his love, his
compassions, his tenderness, which have melted, overcome, and
changed my heart before him. I have met with the seed’s faith,
which hath done and doth that which the faith of man can never
do. I have met with the true birth, with the birth which is
heir of the kingdom, and inherits the kingdom. I have met with
the true spirit of prayer and supplication, wherein the Lord is
prevailed with, and which draws from him whatever the condition
needs, the soul always looking up to him in the will, and in the
time and way which is acceptable with him. What shall I say? I
have met with the true peace, the true righteousness, the true
holiness, the true rest of the soul, the everlasting habitation,
which the redeemed dwell in. And I know all these to be true,
in him that is true, and am capable of no doubt, dispute, or
reasoning in my mind about them, it abiding there, where it hath
received the full assurance and satisfaction. And also I know
very well and distinctly in spirit, where the doubts and disputes
are, and where the certainty and full assurance is, and in the
tender mercy of the Lord am preserved out of the one, and in the
other.
‘Now, the Lord knows, these things I do not utter in a boasting
way, but would rather be speaking of my nothingness, my
emptiness, my weakness, my manifold infirmities, which I feel
more than ever. The Lord hath broken the man’s part in me, and
I am a worm and no man before him: I have no strength to do any
good or service for him; nay, I cannot watch over or preserve
myself: I feel daily that I keep not alive my own soul, but am
weaker before men, yea weaker in my spirit, as in myself, than
ever I have been. But I cannot but utter to the praise of my God,
that I feel his arm stretched out for me; and my weakness, which
I feel in myself, is not my loss, but advantage, before him. And
these things I write, as having no end at all therein of my own,
but felt it this morning required of me, and so in submission
and subjection to my God, have I given up to do it, leaving the
success and service of it with him.