"You seen Parson lately, George?"
"Not lately I ain't, Luther."
"Not since 'is 'taters be out o' ground?"
"No. Finest crop in village, some do say."
"That be right--sev'ral ton of 'em there be."
"What to goodness do 'e want 'em all for, then? 'Im an' 's wife an' a
maid 'll never eat all them 'taters."
"I'll tell you what 'e says to me, for 'appen 'e'll say it to you,
George, when 'e comes acrost you next. 'E says to me, 'I've growed
as many potatoes as I've had strength to grow, an' they've prospered
exceedin'ly,' 'e says, 'thank God! So if any deservin' folk in my parish
gets through wi' their own crop an' wants more later on they 'as only to
come to me, for I've growed more 'an my 'ouse'old 'll eat if they was to
eat all day.'"
"'E be proud o' that?"
"Fine an' proud 'e be."
"An' yet it be some'at unfort'nate too. For all of us as is left in this
'ere parish 'as growed as many 'taters as they'll be like to need, same
as 'e. So I don't see nought but disappointment for Parson an' a lot o'
good 'taters lyin' to rot in their pies."
"Some there be too fond o' Parson to let that 'appen. Me an' my wife
be sendin' few of ours to London ev'ry week or so. So in due season we
shall be free to go to Parson an' 'elp 'im through wi' 'is, same as 'e
wants us to. I 'ears as others is doin' some'at the same as us--fear is
as too many'll tumble to the idea, which is why I'd 'ave you keep it
fro' goin' further, George."
"Silent as th' grave I'll be. So you're givin' your 'taters 'way to
please Parson? Yet I do allus say as 'taters what a man grows wi' sweat
of 'is own brow do beat all others in t' eatin'."
"That may be; but us can't afford to be so mighty pernickerty in time o'
war. Nor we ain't givin' nothin 'way in manner o' speakin'. Fair market
price they gives for 'em in London. So it be somethin' in 'and in these
'ard times as well as savin' Parson from a bitter disappointment what 'e
ain't done nothin' to deserve, so far as I can see."
* * * * *
"Two organ grinders, aged 23 and 16, were taken to Charing Cross
Hospital to-day with bad injuries and severe shock, the result of a
barrel organ getting out of control in Rosebery-avenue."--_Evening
Paper_.
They should try a less dangerous instrument next time.
* * * * *
"'Seed potatoes' means potatoes grown in Scotland or Ireland in the
year 1917, or grown in England or Wales in the year 1917 from seed
grown in Scotland or Ireland in the year 1916, which will pass
through a riddle having a 1-5/8-in. mesh, and will not pass through
a riddle having a 1-5/8-in. mesh."--_Journal of the Board of
Agriculture_.
We ourselves cannot get through any riddle of this kind.
* * * * *
[Illustration: _Sergeant (instructing squad of volunteers in physical
drill)._ "THIS 'ERE HEXERCISE IS INTENDED TO 'ARDEN THE MUSCLES OF
THE STUMMICK AND MAKE IT HIMPERVIOUS TO GERMAN BULLETS HIN CASE OF
HINVASION."]
* * * * *