It is torture being away from her. I had thought that when I was here
and not exposed to the temptation of going round and seeing her, that
it would be easier; it is not. I long to write, and how I wonder
whether she is feeling it as I do.
I have read somewhere that a woman's passion once aroused is more
ungovernable than a man's. That her whole being cries aloud for me
cannot be doubted, and if the above statement is true what
inflexibility of will she must be showing--it almost makes me fear--but
no, I will defeat her in this strange contest, and she shall be my
wife.
The work here is strenuous, and the grass does not grow under one's
feet. The course for commanding officers lasts four weeks, and
terminates in an exceedingly practical but rather fearsome test--i.e.,
they have six steamers here camouflaged after the English fashion with
dazzle painting, and these six steamers, protected by launches and
harbour defence craft, steam across Kiel Bay in the manner of a convoy.
The officer being examined has to attack this group of ships in one of
the instructional submarines, and in three attacks he must score at
least two hits, or else, in theory, he is returned to general service
in the Fleet.
Fortunately at the moment I hear that owing to recent losses they are
distinctly on the short side where submarine officers are concerned, so
they'll probably make it easy when I do my test.
* * * * *
I see I have written nothing here for a fortnight; this is due to two
causes: Firstly, I have been so extraordinarily busy, and, secondly, I
have been most depressed through a letter I received from Fritz. It
contained two items of bad news.
In the first place, I heard for the first time of the tragedy of
Heinrich Baumer's boat, and to my astonishment Fritz tells me that Rosa
and another girl were in her when she was lost!
It appears that she was to go out for a couple of hours' diving off the
port as a matter of routine after her two months' overhaul. She went
out at 10 a.m., and was sighted from the signal station at the end of
the mole at 11.30, when almost immediately afterwards there was an
explosion and she disappeared. Motor-boats were quickly on the scene,
but only debris came to the surface. Divers were sent down, and
reported that she was in ten metres of water completely shattered. It
is assumed, for lack of other explanation, that she struck a chance
drifting mine which was moving down the coast on the tide.
Meanwhile Rosa and another sister were missing from the hospital, and
after forty-eight hours someone put two and two together and started
investigations. It has been ascertained that Baumer motored down from
Bruges after breakfast, and that in the car were two figures taken to
be sailors, as they were muffled up in oilskins. This fact was noted by
the control sentries, as, though the day was showery, it was not
raining hard. Other scraps of evidence unite in showing that these were
the two girls who had apparently induced Baumer to take them out for a
dive as a treat.
What a tragedy! However, it must have been quite instantaneous. Poor
Rosa, with all her vanities about war work, to think that the war would
claim her like that! [1]
[Footnote 1: It is known that a boat with women on board was lost
whilst exercising off Zeebrugge in the Spring of 1917. This would
appear to be the boat in question.--ETIENNE.]
Fritz added that old Max is almost off his head with rage over the
whole business, and it is difficult to say whether he is more angry
over Baumer and the boat being lost, or over the fact that Baumer being
dead he is unable to administer those "disciplinary actions" in which
he delights.
* * * * *
Great excitement here, as the day after to-morrow His Imperial Majesty
the Kaiser and Hindenburg are due to pay Kiel a surprise visit. We are
to be inspected and addressed. Tremendous preparations are going on.
* * * * *
His Majesty, accompanied by the great Field-Marshal, inspected us this
morning, and made a fine speech, of which we have been given printed
copies. I shall frame mine and hang it in my boat, if I get a command.