Feller sisters:--When I caste mi eye on a sirkle of luvely wimmin bizzy
with their needles, mi harte seems tew stretch clean akross mi buzzum.
And when i reflek for a minnit, that tha are tew work for nothing, and
find themselfs, and that a yung heathin stans reddy yelping around the
corner, for the very shirt tha are wurking on, it duz seem tu me, that i
cud shout hozzanner for 3 weeks on a strech.
Feller Sisters, yu kan kount on Josh Billings az a frend; he luves
charitee, az a pup hankers for nu milk; his verry natur looks out onto
the horizen ov the poor folks, jist as the lite ov a tin lantern shines
akross a bog meddow.
And he sees the little bare bak yung ones shivering for a krust ov
bread, and hungry for a shirt; then he looks at the Sisters, a talking
and sowing, and sowing and talking, and he kounts a hole parcil ov
little shirts on the tabil, and then he thinks ov the widders cruise,
and the bred hove onto the waters, menshioned in the good Book, and he
feels jist az tho he wud like tew own awl the femail sowing sosieties in
the wurld hisself, and put hiz hole fortin in the little reddy made
cottin shirt bizziness.
Oh Charitee! Oh Charitee! When Josh Billings communes with you, he feals
az tho he had jist been tried out, and sot awa tew cool.
Feller Sisters, don't be skeered, let the ritch and the hawty stik up
their nozes, and let the eddicated larf.
Josh wud like no better fun than jiss to bet his 9 dollars, that enny
Sister, in full communion with this ere sowing sosiety, who puts in full
time, and cuts the cotting tew advantage, wil git her final reward.
Tew konklude, Feller Sisters, pitch in; remember Mr. Lots wife, she that
was salted for looken bak.
Cum together arly, and oftin, buy yure cottin by the pease; be keerful
how yu deal out youre shirts, for thare iz evry now and then, a bogus
heathin.
[Illustration: JOSH ADDRESSES THE FEMAIL "PORDUNK SOWING SOSIETY."]
Stan bi yure konstitushion, and bi laws, dew awl this, and the "Femail
Pordunk Sowing Sosiety" will go down tew futer prosterita, like a
wide-awake torchlite possession.