EURIPIDES. "What! the two powerful monarchs, who reign over the Grecian
youth, phlattothrattophlattothrat, are sending the Sphinx, that terrible
harbinger of death, phlattothrattophlattothrat. With his avenging arm
bearing a spear, phlattothrattophlattothrat, the impetuous bird delivers
those who lean to the side of Ajax, phlattothrattophlattothrat, to the
dogs who roam in the clouds, phlattothrattophlattothrat."[515]
DIONYSUS (_to Aeschylus_). What is this 'phlattothrat'? Does it come from
Marathon or have you picked it out of some labourer's chanty?
AESCHYLUS. I took what was good and improved it still more, so that I
might not be accused of gathering the same flowers as Phrynichus in the
meadow of the Muse. But this man borrows from everybody, from the
suggestions of prostitutes, from the sons of Melitus,[516] from the
Carian flute-music, from wailing women, from dancing-girls. I am going to
prove it, so let a lyre be brought. But what need of a lyre in his case?
Where is the girl with the castanets? Come, thou Muse of Euripides; 'tis
quite thy business to accompany songs of this sort.
DIONYSUS. This Muse has surely done fellation in her day, like a Lesbian
wanton.[517]
AESCHYLUS. "Ye halcyons, who twitter over the ever-flowing billows of the
sea, the damp dew of the waves glistens on your wings; and you spiders,
who we-we-we-we-we-weave the long woofs of your webs in the corners of
our houses with your nimble feet like the noisy shuttle, there where the
dolphin by bounding in the billows, under the influence of the flute,
predicts a favourable voyage; thou glorious ornaments of the vine, the
slender tendrils that support the grape. Child, throw thine arms about my
neck."[518] Do you note the harmonious rhythm?
DIONYSUS. Yes.
AESCHYLUS. Do you note it?
DIONYSUS. Yes, undoubtedly.
AESCHYLUS. And does the author of such rubbish dare to criticize my
songs? he, who imitates the twelve postures of Cyrené in his poetry?[519]
There you have his lyric melodies, but I still want to give you a sample
of his monologues. "Oh! dark shadows of the night! what horrible dream
are you sending me from the depths of your sombre abysses! Oh! dream,
thou bondsman of Pluto, thou inanimate soul, child of the dark night,
thou dread phantom in long black garments, how bloodthirsty, bloodthirsty
is thy glance! how sharp are thy claws! Handmaidens, kindle the lamp,
draw up the dew of the rivers in your vases and make the water hot; I
wish to purify myself of this dream sent me by the gods. Oh! king of the
ocean, that's right, that's right! Oh! my comrades, behold this wonder.
Glycé has robbed me of my cock and has fled. Oh, Nymphs of the mountains!
oh! Mania! seize her! How unhappy I am! I was full busy with my work, I
was sp-sp-sp-sp-spinning the flax that was on my spindle, I was rounding
off the clew that I was to go and sell in the market at dawn; and he flew
off, flew off, cleaving the air with his swift wings; he left to me
nothing but pain, pain! What tears, tears, poured, poured from my
unfortunate eyes! Oh! Cretans, children of Ida, take your bows; help me,
haste hither, surround the house. And thou, divine huntress, beautiful
Artemis, come with thy hounds and search through the house. And thou
also, daughter of Zeus, seize the torches in thy ready hands and go
before me to Glycé's home, for I propose to go there and rummage
everywhere."[520]
DIONYSUS. That's enough of choruses.
AESCHYLUS. Yes, faith, enough indeed! I wish now to see my verses weighed
in the scales; 'tis the only way to end this poetic struggle.
DIONYSUS. Well then, come, I am going to sell the poet's genius the same
way cheese is sold in the market.
CHORUS. Truly clever men are possessed of an inventive mind. Here again
is a new idea that is marvellous and strange, and which another would not
have thought of; as for myself I would not have believed anyone who had
told me of it, I would have treated him as a driveller.
DIONYSUS. Come, hither to the scales.
AESCHYLUS AND EURIPIDES. Here we are.
DIONYSUS. Let each one hold one of the scales, recite a verse, and not
let go until I have cried, "Cuckoo!"
AESCHYLUS AND EURIPIDES. We understand.
DIONYSUS. Well then, recite and keep your hands on the scales.
EURIPIDES. "Would it had pleased the gods that the vessel Argo had never
unfurled the wings of her sails!"[521]