_Monday, February 23rd._--The Highland Fling involves, I understand, some
complicated figures, but it is nothing to the Lowland Reel (COATS'
variety), on which subject Sir AUCKLAND GEDDES was rather badly heckled
this afternoon. A suggestion that Messrs. COATS might use the profits of
their foreign trade to reduce the price to the home consumer drove the
harassed Minister into an unconscious _mot_. "Suppose," he said, "they cut
the thread ... where should we be then?"
[Illustration: THE TANK AND THE LITTLE BRICK.
(MR. CHURCHILL AND CAPTAIN WEDGWOOD BENN.)
"The tank, weighing thirty tons, is able to pass over a brick lying on the
road without crushing it. This is a very important point."--_Mr.
CHURCHILL_.]
Mr. CHARLES PALMER, the well-known _Globe_-trotter, has just completed a
remarkable journey. Within the space of a few weeks he has traversed the
distance from the Press Gallery to the Floor of the Chamber, going round by
the Wrekin. During the last stage of the route the intrepid traveller was
accompanied by Sir HENRY DALZIEL and Mr. BOTTOMLEY.
In introducing a Vote on Account of the Army for a trifle of seventy-four
millions the WAR MINISTER proudly announced that Britain and Germany were
the only countries in the world that had abolished conscription--and
Germany's action was not exactly voluntary.
Mr. CHURCHILL'S description of a new tank, so fast that it could outstrip a
foxhound "over a country," so cool that even in the tropics its crew would
preserve their _sangfroid traditionnel_, and so delicately sprung that it
could run over a brick without hurting itself--or the brick--momentarily
encouraged the belief that here was the weapon to make war impossible. But
almost in the same breath Mr. CHURCHILL stated that simultaneously the War
Office had invented a rifle grenade which would put the super-tank out of
action. "As you were!"
Criticism was not entirely disarmed. Mr. DEVLIN of course talked of
Ireland--"the only country with which the Empire is at war to-day;" and
little Capt. WEDGWOOD BENN rebuked Mr. CHURCHILL for his unfilial sneer at
"pious America," and was himself advised "not to develop more indignation
than he could contain."
_Tuesday, February 24th._--In both Houses the new policy of the Allies in
regard to Soviet Russia was unfolded. The gist of it is that they will not
enter into diplomatic relations with the Bolshevist Government until it is
ready to adopt civilised methods, but in the meantime will heartily
encourage trade with Russia. It would seem that the practical genius of our
race has once more discovered a means of indulging sentiment without
interfering with business.
[Illustration: THE LABOUR LORD CHANCELLOR.
_A forecast._