_HANDBILLS, INSCRIPTIONS, ETC._
Under this head it is our intention to give some slight insight into
peculiarities of a kind of advertising unconnected with newspapers, and
independent of any of the subjects treated in preceding chapters. We set
forth with a great variety of handbills, which seemed almost too
extensive for use in this volume; but we have already got rid of so many
that the task of disposal is considerably lightened--so lightened,
indeed, by the absorption of many of the most characteristic into
preceding pages, that by comparison with the original collection our
present supply seems rather meagre. It will doubtless, however, be found
sufficient for the requirements of readers. We have already given an
outline of the history of advertising by means of bills and posters, and
have referred to the gradual growth of the system of “billing” until it
has attained its present proportions. This system, though regarded by
the Board of Works as very objectionable, is far pleasanter than that
adopted twenty years ago, when every billsticker considered it his
bounden duty to overstick the placards of opponents, and when nothing
but a long course of education, or a most vivid imagination, would
enable the passer-by to read what was upon the dead walls and hoardings.
The Board of Works certainly took the initiative at the wrong time--at
the time when improvement was vast and apparent to every one; but as it
failed in its object, we may consider that public opinion has admitted
the improvement, and no longer regards wall-advertising as a nuisance.
The Board doubtless started on the idea at a time when placarding was a
most decided scandal, but it--like most other committees--took so long
to bring the idea to perfection, that the scandal had abolished itself
long before the Board was ready to abolish it. Having already entered
into full particulars as to the modes formerly adopted, and contrasted
them with those in use at the present time, individual efforts at
illuminating the public mind will now be found amply sufficient for our
purpose. Some of these are, as all the world knows, extremely funny on
account of the vagueness of the writers, and in that particular resemble
many of those we have instanced from the columns of newspapers. A very
few examples of this kind will suffice, and will pave the way for the
heavier material. One of the best of those inscriptions, the comicality
of which is founded upon ignorance, appeared in 1821, and was posted up
by order of Lord Camden in that portion of the county of Kent which
called him owner. It said:--
Notice is hereby given, that the Marquis of Camden (on account of the
backwardness of the harvest) will not shoot himself, nor any of his
tenants, till the 14th of September.
We don’t suppose that the Marquis had anything to do with the actual
wording of the notice, but he has always been identified with it, and
doubtless was cruelly badgered about it at the time. Another lordly
notice of a similar kind appeared a few years back at Osterly Park, near
Brentford, the seat of the Earl of Jersey, which gave the public this
information: “Ten shillings reward.--Any person found trespassing on
these lands or damaging these fences on conviction will receive the
above reward. Dogs poisoned.” Somebody once said that nobody expects to
find education or ability in a lord, but that is because his household
are expected to fulfil his duties properly. Lords would seem in imminent
danger of having to pick up a little scholarship, and use it in the
interest of their dependants. If so, polo and pigeon-shooting will
languish, and West-End night-schools may become fashionable. But getting
away from the aristocracy, and turning our attention to the other side
of the social sphere, we don’t find matters anyway improved, if we are
to judge by the specimens of literary ability which now and then address
themselves to the curious pedestrian. In Lambeth the latter might some
short time back have been terrified by an announcement in a baker’s
shop, which informed all whom it might concern that _vitals_ were baked
there. Not so terrible, but more comical, is the following, which is
copied from an announcement in the window of a shop at Chatham: “The
public are requested not to confound this shop with that of another
swindler who has established himself on the other side of the way.”
There is a story told of two rival shoemakers, one of whom astonished
his opponent by the inscription, “Mens conscia recti.” He was not
allowed his triumph unalloyed, for the other, after puzzling over the
notice for some days, divined that it was some new name for
“understandings,” and feeling sure there was nothing in the opposition
shop that was not in his own, replied with this, “Men’s and women’s
conscia recti may be obtained here.” This story, however, requires
confirmation, as does that of the two provincial photographers. One is
said to have placed over his studio, “The acme of photography,” to which
his enemy and neighbour replied, “Photography in the very height of
acme.” Salt seems necessary to both of these, but we are informed on
good authority that the next one is quite true. A correspondent says
that the following is a verbatim copy of a sign formerly to be seen over
a shoemaker’s shop in the village of Heallan, near Denbigh, Wales. The
schoolmaster would seem to have been a long way abroad when the sign was
composed:--
Pryce Dyas, Coblar, daler in Bacco Shag and Pig tail, Bacon and
Ginarbread Eggs laid every morning by me, and very good Paradise, in
the Summer, Gentlemen and Lady can have good Tae and Crumquets and
Strawburry with a scim milk, because I can’t get no cream.--N.B. Shuse
and Boots mended very well.
Of a similar kind is the following, which was, years back, copied from a
bill in the window of a small house near Lancaster:--
James Williams, parish clerk, saxtone, town crier, and bellman, makes
and sells all sorts of haberdasharies, groceries, &c.; likewise, hair
and wigs drest and cut on the shortest notice. N.B.--I keeps an
evening scool, where I teach, at reasonable rates, reading, riting,
and rithmitic, and singing. N.B.--I play the hooboy occasionally if
wanted. N.B.--My shop is next door, where I bleed, draw teeth, and
shoo horses, with the greatest scil. N.B.--Children taut to dance if
agreeable at 6d. per week, by me, J. Williams, who buy and sell old
iron, and coats--boots and shoos cleaned and mended. N.B.--A hat and
pr of stockens to be cudgelled for, the best in 5, on Shrof Tushday.
For particulars encuire within, or at the horse shoo and bell, near
the church, on t’other side the way. N.B.--Look over the dore for the
sign of the 3 pidgeons. N.B.--I sells good ayle, and sometimes cyder.
Lodgings for single men. N.B.--I teach jografy, algebry, and them
outlandish kind of things. A ball on Wednesdays and Fridays.
The next quaint window inscription, which treats of the troubles of a
small shopkeeper, may also be depended upon, it being an exact copy of a
written card suspended in the shop window of a tradesman in Horsemarket
Street, Warrington. One can conceive the amount of provocation undergone
and the indignation felt by the honest purveyor of mousetraps, whose
blood must have been at boiling point when he penned this:--
Notice I dont keep twelve hole mousetrap nor penney ones what i keep I
sell to respectable people not to impudent Boys Hand Bad Girls that
comes to rob me and annoy me and has bad parents those that come into
my shop shall be severely beat and put into the celler and took before
the magistrates those that come into a shop and ask for article that
is not made they must come to steal.
Examples like this are manifold, and could be extended to great length,
but those we have given are quite enough to afford a vivid idea of the
danger of venturing upon literature without the precaution of first
learning the rudiments of education, and of the ridicule likely to
attend upon any more than usually ambitious effort, which succeeds in
landing its perpetrator quite out of his depth.
Old playbills offer a fruitful subject to the investigator, but their
actual origin is hidden in the obscurity of ages. So far as their
history goes, however, they are plentiful, and mention of them is made
in works of a period far anterior to the date of any specimens extant.
The modern drama had its origin in an attempt to commemorate the
mysteries of the Incarnation, from whence the plays were called
mysteries; and it is recorded that one Gregory Nazianzen, an early
father of the Christian Church, constructed a drama on the Passion, for
the purpose of counteracting the profanities of the ancient plays, about
the year of our Lord 364. We have to pass over eight hundred years for
the next mention of dramatic representations, and then it is met in
Fitzstephen, who states that “London had for its theatrical exhibitions
holy plays, and the representation of miracles wrote by holy
confessors.” This would be towards the close of the twelfth century; and
next we come to the Chester Mysteries, which were performed about 1270.
These have been reprinted during the present century, and the
application of the word mystery is explained in the two subjoined verses
from the proclamation or prologue to the Whitsun Plays, a title by which
the famous Chester Mysteries were also known. The “moonke” mentioned is
Done Rondali, of Chester Abbey, who founded the plays:--
This moonke, moonke-like in Scriptures well seene
In storyes travelled with the best sorte;
In pagentes set fourth, apparently to all eyne,
The Olde and Newe Testament with livelye comforte;
Intermynglinge therewith, onely to make Sporte,
Some things not warranted by any writt,
Which, to glad the hearers, he woulde men to take yt.
Now, you worshippfull Tanners, that of custome olde
The fall of Lucifer did set out,
Some writers awarrante your matter; therefore be boulde,
Lustily to playe the same to all the rowtte;
And yf any thereof stande in any doubte,
Your author his author hath, your shewe let bee,
Good speech, fyne players, with apparill comelye.
With the history of plays we have nothing to do, and need only state
that the first regular English tragedy was “Ferrex and Porrex,” which
was acted before Queen Elizabeth on the 18th of January 1561 by the
gentlemen of the Inner Temple. This same play was tried at one of the
minor theatres in 1854, but had no claim upon the tastes of the time.
From a passage in Strype’s Life of Archbishop Grindall, it has been
assumed that the custom of issuing bills, giving information concerning
the time, place, and nature of plays to be acted, came in with the plays
themselves, as it is there shown to exist prior to the year 1563. In
alluding to Grindall’s objections to dramatic representations, Strype
mentions that the Archbishop complained to Queen Elizabeth’s secretary
that the players “did then daily, but especially on the holidays, set up
their _bills_, inviting to plays.” This, however, is a somewhat curious
error of Strype’s, into which Mr Payne Collier has also fallen. The
Bishop did not write _bills_ but _booths_; his words are as follows:
“Common players, now daylie, but speciallye on holy dayes, set up
_boothes_ whereunto the youthe resorteth excessively.” There is,
however, other evidence to prove that playbills were in use not long
after the above date; for John Northbrooke, in his treatise against
theatrical performances, printed about 1579, says: “They use to set up
their bills upon posts some certain days before, to admonish people to
make resort to their theatres.” At that time the Stationers’ Company had
the right of giving licences for the printing of playbills, and in the
year 1587 its Court of Assistants conferred upon John Charlewood the
privilege of being the sole printer of bills for players. Before that
time they were printed by one James Roberts, who names “the bills for
the players” amongst his publications as early as 1573--six years before
Northbrooke’s mention of them--and, authorised no doubt by Charlewood,
he continued to print them until after the year 1600. This right of
printing playbills was at a subsequent period assumed by the Crown. A
broadside, dated 1620, is preserved in the Library of the Society of
Antiquaries, by which this privilege was granted to a printing firm by
James I. It is entitled “An Abstract of his Majesty’s Letters Patent
granted unto Roger Wood and Thomas Symcocke, for the sole printing of
paper and parchment on the one side.” Among the articles enumerated as
coming under this category are, “Bills for Playes, Pastimes, Showes,
Challenges, Prizes, or Sportes whatsoever.” At the end the public are
informed that if they may want any work of that description, they need
only repair to Edward Allde (Wood and Symcocke’s assignee), “in the Old
Change at the Golden Anchor, over against Carter Lane end, where they
shall be reasonably dealt with for the same.”
According to Malone these early playbills did not contain a list of the
characters or of the names of the actors by whom they were represented.
But that the name of the author was sometimes, if not always, on the
playbill may be inferred from a passage in the anonymous play of
“Histriomastix” (1610), act iv., in which Belch, speaking of Post-hast
the playwriter, says, “It is as dangerous to read his name at a play
dore, as a printed bill on a plague dore,” the allusion being to the
practice of writing “Lord have mercy upon us” on the doors of houses in
which the plague had broken out, which words of course were a caution,
and made people pass on hurriedly. In the same play also we find a
curious illustration of our subject in a reference to the part of one of
the inferior actors. In act iii. the stage direction says, “Enter Belch
setting up bills.” And it may not be out of place to remark that the
word poster is evidently derived from the custom of sticking bills on
posts. That bills were stuck on posts for choice, many of them at stated
or customary places, there is plenty of evidence. Sometimes they were
ordered to be stuck upon doors and gates, as in the following, though
this very possibly means door or gate post. From the _Moderate
Intelligencer_, March 18-25, 1647, we discover that in the time of civil
war, when the bishops’ lands and palaces were sold, the following places
were appointed by Parliament to be used for affixing bills concerning
the sales. Upon the outer gate and upon the hall door of Sir Richard
Gourney’s house in the Old Jewry (this was the office where the
committee charged with those sales held their sitting), upon the north
door of St Paul’s Church, upon the gate of Guildhall, and upon the gate
of Blackwell Hall.
As long as they have had an existence--from the sixteenth century--these
bills have gone by the name of playbills. In the prologue to the
anonymous tragedy of “A Warning for Fair Women” (1599), Tragedy whips
History and Comedy from the stage, exclaiming:--
’Tis you have kept the theatre so long
Painted in Play bills upon every post,
While I am scornèd of the multitude.
They have also, however, in various places and at various times, been
called “text bills for plays.” The natural and shorter title, though,
always overruled its more pretentious rival. From the prologue to
Shirley’s “Cardinal” (1652) it appears that it was usual to add on the
bill whether the piece was a comedy or a tragedy. This “Cardinal” being
a tragedy, the author apologises in the following words for only calling
it “a play” in the bills:--
Think what you please, we call it but a “play.”
Whether the comic muse, or lady’s love,
Romance, or direful tragedy it prove,
The bill determines not: and you would be
Persuaded I would have’t a comedy
For all the purple in the name.
From which it may be inferred that the names of tragedies, for greater
distinction, were usually, or at all events occasionally, printed in red
ink. That the custom of posting playbills continued in the reign of
Charles II. may be inferred from the following entry in Pepys’ Diary: “I
went to see if any play was acted and I found none upon the posts, it
being Passion Weeke.”
During the Civil Wars the drama had a hard struggle not to be swamped in
the deluge which destroyed all things appertaining to the pomp and
luxury of the Court, or connected with pleasure generally. The face of
the Parliament was turned against stage-plays, and when the war broke
out, one of the first measures was that which led to the publication of
the following bill:--
_Ordinance of the Lords and Commons concerning Stage-Plays._
^Whereas,^
The distressed Estate of Ireland, steeped in her own Blood, and the
distracted Estate of England, threatened with a Cloud of Blood by a
civil War, call for all possible Means to appease and avert the Wrath
of God, appearing in these Judgements; amongst which Fasting and
Prayer, having been often tried to be very effectual, have been
lately, and are still, enjoined; And whereas public Sports do not well
agree with public Calamities, nor public Stage-plays with the Seasons
of Humiliation, this being an exercise of sad and pious Solemnity, and
the other being Spectacles of Pleasure too commonly expressing
lascivious Mirth and Levity; It is therefore thought fit, and ordered
by the Lords and Commons in this Parliament assembled, That while
these sad Causes and set Times of Humiliation do continue, public
Stage-plays shall cease and be forborne. Instead of which are
recommended to the People of this Land the profitable and seasonable
consideration of Repentance, Reconciliation, and Peace with God, which
probably will produce outward Peace and Prosperity, and bring again
Times of Joy and Gladness to these Nations.
This intimation was of course received with much outcry, and “The
Actors’ Remonstrance” was soon published. In it the writer complains
naturally of a law which robs the poor player of his livelihood, and
allows bear-gardens and suchlike places to remain unmolested to the
delectation of “boisterous butchers, cutting cobblers, hard-handed
masons, and the like riotous disturbers of the public peace.” The
playhouses are defended against sundry charges brought against them, and
a promise is made that no female whatsoever shall be admitted unless
accompanied by her husband or some male relative; besides which the use
of tobacco is to be forbidden even in the threepenny galleries, except
in the case of “the pure Spanish leaf.” It may thus be readily guessed
that something worse even than the cheap “sensation smokes” of the
present day was often misnamed tobacco. This is hard to believe,
however. The promise extends to the expulsion of all ribaldry from the
stage; and the actors say, “We will so demean ourselves as none shall
esteem us of the ungodly, or have cause to repine at our actions or
interludes; we will not entertain any comedian that shall speak his part
in a tone as if he did it in derision of some of the pious, but reform
all our disorders and amend all our amisses.” During the Commonwealth,
stage-plays were almost openly connived at; and the licence indulged in
during the Restoration days is too well known to require notice here.
An interesting epoch in the history of the drama is the first appearance
of David Garrick, and it is noticeable that the playbill which
commemorates the event does not contain his name. Neither, for the
matter of that, does it contain the name of the author of the play, who,
if Shakespeare, must have been improved and amended. The monopoly of the
patent theatres was such that these plays had to be advertised and
regarded as simply interludes to a musical entertainment. As witness:--
_October 19, 1741._
GOODMAN’S FIELDS.
At the late Theatre in Goodman’s Fields, this Day will be perform’d a
_Concert of Vocal_ and _Instrumental Music_, divided into two Parts.
Tickets at Three, Two and One Shilling.
Places for the Boxes to be taken at the Fleece Tavern, near the
Theatre.
N.B. Between the two Parts will be presented an Historical Play,
called the Life and Death of
KING RICHARD THE THIRD,
containing the Distresses of
KING HENRY VI.
The Artful Acquisition of the Crown by
KING RICHARD,
The Murder of the young King Edward V. and his Brother, in the
Tower,
The Landing of the Earl of Richmond,
And the Death of King Richard in the memorable Battle of Bosworth
Field, being the last that was fought between the
Houses of York and Lancaster.
With many other true historical Passages.
The Part of KING RICHARD _by a Gentleman_.
(_Who never appeared on any Stage._)
King Henry, by Mr. Giffard; Richmond, Mr. Marshall; Prince Edward, by
Miss Hippisley; Duke of York, Miss Naylor; Duke of Buckingham, Mr.
Peterson; Duke of Norfolk, Mr. Blades; Lord Stanley, Mr. Pagett;
Oxford, Mr. Vaughan; Tressel, Mr. W. Giffard; Catesby, Mr. Marr;
Rutcliff, Mr. Crofts; Blunt, Mr. Naylor; Tyrrell, Mr. Puttenham; Lord
Mayor, Mr. Dunstall; The Queen, Mrs. Steel; Duchess of York, Mrs.
Yates;
And the Part of Lady ANNE
By Mrs GIFFARD.
With Entertainments of Dancing
By Mons. Fromet, Madame Duvall, and the two Masters and Miss Granier.
To which will be added a _Ballad Opera_ of one Act, called
THE VIRGIN UNMASK’D.
The Part of Lucy by Miss HIPPISLEY.
Both of which will be performed Gratis by Persons for their Diversion.
The Concert will begin exactly at Six o’Clock.
This bill would seem to contradict an inscription in the large room at
the St John’s Gate Tavern, Clerkenwell, which is to the effect that
Garrick made his first appearance on any stage there. The first
appearance of David on any stage was at Ipswich, also in 1741, “where,
under the assumed name of Lyddul, he appeared as Aboan in the tragedy of
‘Oroonoko.’” His acting at the East End of London was a decided
success, and the performances were continued for what was then
considered an almost fabulous period. “The other theatres were quickly
deserted, and Goodman’s Fields became the resort of people of fashion,
even from the West End, till that theatre was shut up.” The last
performance at Goodman’s Fields is said to have taken place on a Sunday.
Another playbill of the middle of the eighteenth century may be found
interesting, though for no such reasons as are found in that of
Goodman’s Fields. It is redolent of the pride and poverty which seem to
be ever associated with the drama in days gone by, and is given by
Boaden in his “Life of Mrs Siddons:”--
At the Old Theatre, in East Grinstead, on Saturday, May, 1758, will be
represented (by particular desire, and for the benefit of Mrs. P.) the
deep and affecting tragedy of
“THEODOSIUS, OR THE FORCE OF LOVE,”
with magnificent scenes, dresses, &c.
Varanes by Mr. P., who will strive, as far as possible, to support the
character of the fiery Persian Prince, in which he was so much admired
and applauded at Hastings, Arundel, Petworth, Midworth, Lewes, &c.
Theodosius by a young Gentleman from the University of Oxford, who
never appeared on any Stage.
Athenais by Mrs. P. Though her present Condition will not permit her
to wait on Gentlemen and Ladies out of the town with Tickets, she
hopes, as on former Occasions, for their Liberality and Support.
Nothing in Italy can exceed the Altar, in the first scene of the Play;
nevertheless should any of the Nobility or Gentry wish to see it
ornamented with Flowers, the Bearer will bring away as many as they
choose to favour him with.
As the coronation of Athenais, to be introduced in the fifth Act,
contains a number of Personages, more than sufficient to fill all the
dressing Rooms, &c., it is hoped no Gentlemen and Ladies will be
offended being refused admission behind the Scenes.
N.B. The great yard Dog, that made so much noise on Thursday night,
during the last Act of King Richard the Third, will be sent to a
Neighbour’s over the way; and on account of the prodigious demand for
places, part of the Stable will be laid into the Boxes on one side,
and the Granary be open for the same purpose on the other.
_Vivat Rex._
Those who are curious in the matter of playbills in all languages will
perhaps accept the annexed as a compromise, and as the nearest thing in
a general way we can manage in the space at command. Those also who are
good at riddles may like to try their skill on it:--
NOTICE.
SAturday 30 and on Sunday 31 of the corrent, in the Royal Theatre of
St. Charles will be represented by the Italian Company the famous Holy
Drama intitled
IL TRIONFO DI GIUDITTA
O SIA
LA MORTE D’ OLOFERNE.
In the interval of the first to the second act it shall have a new and
pompous Ball of the composition of John Baptista Gianini, who has by
title:
IL SACRIFICIO D’ ABRAMO
in which will enter all the excellent corp of Ball, who dance at
present in the said Royal Theatre; the spetacle will be finished with
the second act and Ball analog to the same Drama, all with the
nessessary decoration.
This is who is offered to the Respectable Publick of whom is waited
all the proctetion and concurrence:
_It will begin at 8 o’clok._
Na officina de Simāo Thaddeo Ferreira. 1811. Com licenca.
We next append a bill of the far-famed Richardson’s Theatre under date
1825--one of those distributed during the Bartlemy Fair of that year.
Hone describes the theatre thus: “The outside of this show was in height
upwards of thirty feet, and occupied one hundred feet in width. The
platform on the outside was very elevated; the back of it was lined with
green baize, and festooned with deeply-fringed crimson curtains, except
at two places, where the money-takers sat, which were wide and roomy
projections, fitted up like Gothic shrine-work, with columns and
pinnacles. There were fifteen hundred variegated illumination-lamps
disposed over various parts of the platform, some of them depending from
the top in the shape of chandeliers and lustres, and others in wreaths
and festoons. A band of ten performers in scarlet dresses, similar to
those worn by beefeaters, continually played on clarionets, violins,
trombones, and the long drum; while the performers paraded in their
gayest ‘properties’ before the gazing multitude. Audiences rapidly
ascended on each performance being over, and paying their money to the
receivers in their Gothic seats, had tickets in return; which being
taken at the doors, admitted them to descend into the ‘theatre.’” The
bill is as follows:--
⁂ Change of Performance each Day.
RICHARDSON’S
THEATRE.
_This Day will be performed, an entire New Melo-Drama, called the_
WANDERING
OUTLAW,
_Or, the Hour of Retribution_.
Gustavus, Elector of Saxony Mr. Wright.
Orsina, Baron of Holstein Mr. Cooper.
Ulric and Albert, Vassals to Orsina Messrs. Grove and Moore.
St. Clair, the Wandering Outlaw Mr. Smith.
Rinalda, the Accusing Spirit Mr. Darling.
Monks, Vassals, Hunters, &c.
Rosabella, Wife to the Outlaw Mrs. Smith.
Nuns and Ladies.
The Piece concludes with the DEATH of ORSINA, and the Appearance
of the
_ACCUSING SPIRIT_.
_The Entertainments to conclude with a New Comic Harlequinade,
with New Scenery, Tricks, Dresses, and Decorations, called_
HARLEQUIN
_FAUSTUS!_
OR, THE
DEVIL WILL HAVE HIS OWN.
Luciferno, Mr. THOMAS.
Dæmon Amozor, afterwards Pantaloon, Mr. WILKINSON.--Dæmon Ziokos,
afterwards Clown, Mr. HAYWARD.--Violoncello Player, Mr.
HARTEM.--Baker, Mr. THOMPSON.--Landlord, Mr. WILKINS--Fisherman, Mr.
RAE.--Dr. Faustus, afterwards Harlequin, Mr. SALTER.
Adelada, afterwards Columbine,
Miss WILMOT.
Attendant Dæmons, Sprites, Fairies, Ballad Singers, Flower
Girls, &c. &c.
_The Pantomime will finish with_
A SPLENDID PANORAMA
_Painted by the First Artists_.
BOXES, 2_s._ PIT, 1_s._ GALLERY, 6_d._
Of show advertisements of a different kind, we have preserved one or two
notable specimens. The first is of the time of William and Mary, and
gives itself in two languages, though, unlike the opera bill given a
page or so back, it keeps them separate:--
A Raritie in Nature.
_Surpassing all Prodigies and
strange Births that ever were seen,
more admired by the Learned than
any sort of Creature that ever was
brought to_ England, _whose Body is
of different Colours, part white, part
brown and smooth, part Hairy like
a Satyr, with admirable unusual
growings out, that no reason can
be given for. This Maid is about
16 years of age, of a comely Countenance,
proportionable Body, hath
an excellent head of Hair, speaketh
good English, is Ingenious and
Modest. Any particular Company
may see her at any hour of the day
in_ Bell Savage Yard _on_ Ludgate
Hill, London.
_God save the_ KING.
_Vne Raretée en la Nature_, viz.
Une Fille tres Admirable, elle est
belle, agée de seize ans, son visage,
Col, mameles, Bras & Mains, sont
de Coleur Blanche, merques de
beaucoup taches naturelles, les
jambs, & pieds toutes de mesmes,
le rest du Corps est de divers
Coleurs, avec des Excrescenes
fort estranges on n’a jamais veue
une telle. L’on la voit en toutes
heures du jour dans _Bell-savage-yard_
on _Ludgate Hill, London_.
VIVAT REX.
It is noticeable that the showman uses the common Latin form of “Vivat
Rex” under his French, and adopts an English equivalent in his other
column. About twenty years ago a similar creature was shown in London,
and those who had her in charge vamped up most marvellous stories to
account for the _lusus naturæ_, both decency and probability being
outraged in the attempt to excite a “sensation.” The next bill is,
though of the show series, of a totally different character, and refers
to one of the exhibitions of the famous Figg, the swordsman and
pugilist. It is now the fashion to decry such adventures as that
advertised; but it is hard to believe that both Figg and Sutton were not
far more respectable characters than many who practise the licensed and
misnamed sport of modern times. For ourselves, we could have looked at
such free agents as the rapier and backsword men, or even the more
degraded pugilists, doing their best and their worst on each other,
rather than sit out an aristocratic pigeon match, assist at a battue, or
be party to the coursing of trapped hares and rabbits.
G. R.
[Illustration]
_At Mr. FIGG’s New Amphitheatre._
Joyning to his House, the Sign of the City of _Oxford_, in _Oxford
Road, Marybone Fields_, on _Wednesday_ next, being the _8th_ of
_June_, 1726. _Will be Perform’d a Tryal of Skill by the following_
Masters.
WHereas I _EDWARD SUTTON_, Pipemaker from _Gravesend_, and _Kentish_
Professor of the Noble Science of Defence, having, under a Sleeveless
Pretence been deny’d a Combat by and with the Extoll’d Mr. FIGG; which
I take to be occasioned through fear of his having that Glory Eclipsed
by me, wherewith the Eyes of all Spectators have been so much dazzled:
Therefore, to make appear, that the Great Applause which has so much
puff’d up this Hero, has proceeded only from his Foyling such who are
not worthy the name of Swordsmen, as also that he may be without any
farther Excuse; I do hereby dare the said Mr. FIGG to meet as above,
and dispute with me the Superiority of Judgment in the Sword (which
will best appear by Cuts, _&c._) at all the Weapons he is or shall be
then Capable of Performing on the Stage.
* * * * *
I _JAMES FIGG_, _Oxonian_ Professor of the said Science, will not fail
giving this daring _Kentish_ Champion an Opportunity to make good his
Allegations; when, it is to be hop’d, if he finds himself Foyl’d he
will then change his Tone, and not think himself one of the Number who
are not worthy the Name of Swordsmen, as he is pleased to signifie by
his Expression: However, as the most significant Way of deciding these
Controversies is by Action, I shall defer what I have farther to Act
till the Time above specified; when I shall take care not to deviate
from my usual Custom, in making all such Bravadoes sensible of their
Error, as also in giving all Spectators intire Satisfaction.
N.B. _The Doors will be open’d at Four, and the Masters mount between
Six and Seven exactly._
_VIVAT REX._
Sutton does not seem to have made much but hard knocks by his desire to
uphold the honour of pipemakers and Kentish men, for Figg is generally
characterised as retiring undefeated, and Captain Godfrey, the great
amateur of his day, makes reference to the defeat of Sutton in his
“Treatise upon the Useful Science of Defence” (1747). Speaking of the
Oxford professor, he says: “Fig was the atlas of the sword, and may he
remain the gladiating statue! In him, strength, resolution, and
unparalleled judgment conspired to form a matchless master. There was a
majesty shone in his countenance, and blazed in all his actions, beyond
all I ever saw. His right leg bold and firm, and his left, which could
hardly ever be disturbed, gave him the surprising advantage already
proved, and struck his adversary with despair and panic. He had that
peculiar way of stepping in I spoke of in a parry; he knew his arm and
its just time of moving, put a firm faith in that, and never let his
adversary escape his parry. He was just as much a greater master than
any other I ever saw, as he was a greater judge of time and measure.”
Of Sutton the enthusiastic captain tells us that “he was a resolute,
pushing, awkward swordsman; but by his busy intruding arm, and
scrambling legs, there were few judgments but what were disordered and
disconcerted. Fig managed him the best of any by his charming
distinction of time and measure, in which he far excelled all, and
sufficiently proved these two be the sword’s true foundation.” Figg was
also a great bruiser, and was regarded as the champion of the boxers as
well as the master of the swordsmen. He was a genial good-tempered
fellow, and was the boon companion of many eminent authors and artists
of his time.
So much for show and play bills, and the celebrities to whom they have
introduced us. We will now turn to handbill and poster advertisements of
various descriptions. Tickets and bills containing the information that
apartments were to be let were set up over doors at least as early as
1665. In the “Pillulæ Pestilentialis” of the Rev. Richard Hingston,
preacher, of St James’s, Clerkenwell, there is the following in
reference to the Plague and the practice just mentioned:--
No Papers then o’er our Doors were set
With “Chambers ready furnished to be Let,”
But a sad “Lord have Mercy upon us” and
A bloody Cross as fatal Marks did stand.
At the end of a pamphlet, printed in 1673, entitled “An Essay to revive
the Ancient Education of Gentlewomen, in Religion, Manners, and
Tongues,” there is a postscript, containing an advertisement of a
boarding school at Tottenham High Cross. This establishment was under
the management of Mrs Makin, who had been tutoress to the Princess
Elizabeth, daughter of Charles I., and who put forth part of her
prospectus in the following manner:--
Here by the blessing of God, Gentlewomen may be instructed in the
principles of Religion, and in all manner of sober and virtuous
Education: more especially in all Things ordinarily taught in Schools
for the other Sex; as in
Works of all sorts,
Dancing,
Music,
Singing,
Writing,
Keeping Accounts.
Half the Time is to be spent in these Things, and the other half to be
employed in gaining the Latin and French Tongues, and those that
please may learn Greek and Hebrew, the Italian and Spanish; in all
which this Gentlewoman hath a competent knowledge.
Gentlewomen of eight or nine Years old, that can read well, may be
instructed in a Year or two (according to their Parts) in the Latin
and French Tongues, by plain and short Rules accommodated to the
English Tongue.
Those that will bestow a longer Time may learn the other Languages
before mentioned, if they please.
Repositories also for Visibles shall be prepared, by which from
beholding the things, Gentlewomen may learn the Names, Natures,
Values, and Uses of Herbs, Shrubs, Trees, mineral Juices, Metals and
Stones.
Those that please may learn Limning, Preserving, Pastry, and Cookery,
etc.
The rate shall be certain £20 per Annum; but if a competent
improvement be made in the Tongues, and the other Things before
mentioned, as shall be agreed upon them, something more will be
expected. But the Parents shall judge what shall be deserved by the
Undertaker.
Sterne, who knew as much about struggles and adversity as most people,
used to tell this story about his young days: “I happened to be
acquainted with a young man from Yorkshire, who rented a window in one
of the paved alleys near Cornhill, for the sale of stationery. I hired
one of the panes of glass from my friend, and stuck up the following
advertisement with wafers:--
Epigrams, Anagrams, Paragrams, Chronograms, Monograms, Epitaphs,
Epithalamiums, Prologues, Epilogues, Madrigals, Interludes,
Advertisements, Letters, Petitions, Memorials, on every occasion,
Essays on every subject, Pamphlets for and against Ministers, Sermons
upon any Text or for any Sect, to be written here, on reasonable
terms, by
A. B. Philologer.
“The uncommonness of the titles occasioned numerous applications, and at
night I used privately to glide into the office to digest the notes or
heads of the day, and receive the earnest which was directed always to
be left with the memorandums, the writing to be paid for on delivery,
according to the subject.” Yorick speedily became disgusted with this
employment, however, and as soon as he possibly could retired from it.
Another of the triumphs which have unfortunately not come down to the
present generation, and which many will consider to be hardly
compensated for by gas, steam, and electricity, the postal service and
the police system, is that of Mr Nunn, whose bill, published to the
world in the latter portion of the eighteenth century, runs thus:--
_Breeches Making improved by Geometry._
_Thomas Nunn_, Breeches-Maker, No. 29, Wigmore Street, Cavendish
Square, has invented a System on a mathematical Principle, by which
Difficulties are solved, and Errors corrected; its usefulness for Ease
and Neatness in fitting is incomparable, and is the only perfect Rule
for that Work ever discovered. Several hundreds (Noblemen, Gentlemen,
and Others) who have had Proof of its Utility, allow it to excel all
they ever made Trial of.
_N.B._ An approved Method is adopted for keeping them clean without
discommoding by Dust.
In some future day, when personal comfort again becomes one of the fine
arts, one of the chief tests for a wranglership may be the making of
mathematical breeches. If the age is very material, perhaps the approved
method of cleaning them may stand in stead of classics, which are
already going much out of fashion. Our next specimen comes from the
Emerald Isle, and though short is well marked with both of the most
prominent characteristics of the natives. It was given away and posted
up in various parts of Dublin at the end of July 1781:--
This is to certify that I, Daniel O’Flannaghan, am not the Person that
was tarred and feathered by the Liberty Mob, on Tuesday last; and I am
ready to give 20 Guineas to any one that will lay me 50, that I am the
other Man who goes by my Name.
Witness my Hand, this 30th July.
DANIEL O’FLANNAGHAN.
A man who can afford to lay seventy guineas to thirty that he is
himself, and nobody else, deserves credit for his boldness, if not for
his ingenuity. Another bill from Ireland, of a few years later on, next
claims our attention. It refers to a house to let in Coleraine, and is a
specimen of quite another kind of Hibernian humour:--
_To be Let_
To an OPPIDAN, a RURICOLIST, or a COSMOPOLITAN, and may be
entered upon immediately.
The House in STONE ROW, lately possessed by Capt. Siree. To avoid
verbosity the proprietor with compendiosity will give a perfunctory
description of the premises, in the compagination of which he has
sedulously studied the convenience of the occupant--it is free from
opacity, tenebrosity, fumidity, and injucundity, and no building can
have greater pellucidity or translucency--in short, its diaphaneity
even in the crepuscule makes it like a pharos, and without laud, for
its agglutimation and amenity, it is a most delectable commorance; and
whoever lives in it will find that the neighbours have none of the
truculence, the immanity, the torvity, the spinosity, the putidness,
the pugnacity, nor the fugacity observable in other parts of the town;
their propinquity and consanguinity occasions jucundity and
pudicity--from which, and the redolence of the place (even in the dog
days) they are remarkable for longevity. For terms and particulars
apply to JAMES HUTCHISON, opposite the MARKET HOUSE.
_Coleraine, 30th September, 1790._
We commend this to that rather numerous class of people who like words
with plenty of sound, and regard sense as quite a secondary
consideration. Dogberry would have been delighted with it, and the
writer could have commanded his own price as a contributor to certain
newspapers, or as a sporting tipster. We have already given our readers
an advertising tombstone, which was a swindle, inasmuch as it was placed
up to the memory of a person who never existed. We now give another,
which is really what it pretends to be--an improvement of the
opportunity to combine business, not with pleasure, but with mourning.
It stood, we are told, in a burial-ground belonging to one of our old
ivy-clad churches in the North, and was an elegantly-carved memorial
stone, the inscription being:--
Sacred to the Memory
of
JOHN ROBERTS,
Stonemason and Tombcutter,
Who died on Saturday, October the 8th, 1800.
N.B.--The business carried on by the Widow at No. 1, Freshfield place.
[Illustration:
HERE LYES
JEREMY JOBBINS
AN AFFECTIONATE HUSBAND
AND
A TENDER PARENT
HIS·DISCONSOLATE·WIDOW
IN·THE·HOPE·OF·A·BETTER·MEATING
CONTINUES TO
CARRY ON
THE LONG ESTABLISHED
TRIPE AND TROTTER
BUSINESS
AT·THE·SAME·PLACE
AS
BEFORE HER LAMENTED
BEREAVEMENT
READER·PAUSE·&·NOTICE THE·ADDRESS
]
Perhaps her being in the “tombstone line” may be an excuse for the widow
Roberts. We don’t suppose she needed one, however, for any one who would
do what she did would be quite callous as to the world’s opinions. Of
the two we much prefer the Frenchman who erected the stone to an
entirely supposititious person, to the widow who traded on her husband’s
grave. This reminds us that we have received, among many communications,
one containing the above sketch of an advertising tombstone, which the
writer, who dates from a well-known town in the north, Gateshead, states
positively stood in a neighbouring churchyard within his recollection.
The address, he says, was on the footstone. We give the illustration
“without prejudice.” Do tripe and trotters after all produce a prosaic
condition of the human mind suggested by this tombstone, or would the
relict of Jeremy have done as she did had her wares been of a different
kind? In the interests of the edibles referred to, for which we must
confess a weakness, we trust she would. But who shall say?
At the time of the marriage of George the Third’s eldest daughter to the
Duke of Wurtemburg, a curious little handbill was given away about
London. It was printed on both sides, and looked like a tract. Its
contents were to the following effect:--
FRAGMENT _of a_ CHAPTER _concerning the curious_ MANGLE of BEETHAM
_appointed to be read by all the_ LADIES _and_ LAUNDRESSES _of the
land of Albion_.
_By His Majesty’s special command._
CHAP. I.
_1 Beetham’s fame and diligence. 3 his marvellous mill. 6 he
constructs a mangle which surprises the World. 8 The Princesses visit
his museum and praise the curious Machinery. 16 He is mimiced by
others. 18 The King grants his royal patent to the Artist. 22 Beetham
is recompensed by the nobles and the people._
NOW it came to pass, even towards the close of the eighteenth century,
that there lived in the great city which is called London a certain
man of the name of Beetham who had many curious inventions.
2 The same mechanic while the world waged war against _Albion_
cultivated with all diligence the arts of Peace in the ways of wisdom.
3 When therefore he saw that his washing mill pleased the people and
was daily employed by all throughout the regions of Britain and her
colonies.
4 Behold he also constructed another machine more marvellous than the
first which is called a _Mangle_ even to this day. 5 Neither adhered
he to the old gothic plan of his predecessors but formed it new and
surprising in simplicity so that a little maiden could set it in
motion.
6 And it came to pass when a great company of ladies and laundresses
beheld the infant turn the wheel with wonderful ease and moreover saw
the wheel move backwards as well as the way of the wheel whose
revolution was always the same and also saw it move as by self
instinct.
7 That they cried aloud with one voice saying, great and marvellous is
the _Mangle_ of _Beetham_.
8 And in process of time, the princesses and the nobles accompanied a
certain great prince who came from a far country to carry away a royal
beauty, even the eldest daughter of the King.
9 And behold as they passed on their way to view the wonders of the
great temple of _Paul_, one of the damsels lifted up her azure eyes
and beheld the Museum of _Beetham_ fronting the temple of _Dunstan_.
10 At that instant the child was turning the wonderful _Mill_ which
laved the fine linen clean and white in the twinkling of an eye;
11 Also another child by its feeble arm was moving the newly invented
_Mangle_.
12 And lo, one of the nobles cried, wherefore should we pass on
further into the city, let us step aside and see this miracle.
13 Now it came to pass that the company alighted from their gilded
chariots and went into the _Museum_, and marvelled much at the curious
machines.
14 And when they saw the _Mill_ and the _Mangle_, the _Wringer_ also,
and the machine for the _Churning_ of _Milk_, which even _Solomon_
with all his wisdom never invented.
15 They all with one accord commanded the master of the Museum to
prepare for the _Princess_ one of each of these curious machines; to
the end she might spread the fame of the inventor all over the land,
in which she was soon to be a sojourner.
16 ¶ Now--the _Mimic Machinists_ of those days by their enchantments
strove to surpass _Beetham_, but failed by falling into the great
_chaos_ of complication:
17 So that, like the builders of Babel they were confounded; crying
aloud, surely all machination against Beetham must fail, neither can
we imitate the simplicity of his Mangle.
18 And word was carried to the King in those days, even concerning the
new invention of the artist of London.
19 Which prevailed upon him when he also heard of the utility of the
_Mangle_ in tender kindness to all the laundresses of the land to
cause his Royal signet to be set on a certain parchment called a
patent.
20 So that until twice seven seasons should pass no man should imitate
the machine but by the consent of _Beetham_ the Proprietor thereof.
21 And when the King had so done, lo there was prepared many machines
of various sizes in order that the high and the low, the rich and the
poor, might use the same throughout the land, but Beetham was the
vender of them all.
22 And for those which the Princess and the Lords and Ladies of the
Land did cause to be sent to them which were made of Oak whose
duration shall far exceed the years of the generations of the sons of
men and which were for smoothing all the linen of the Households of
the mighty nobles, Beetham received certain pieces of money which
being counted in the coin of Albion amounted to Ten guineas.
23 And for such as were made of the wood called Beech he received nine
pieces of gold and for others eight pieces of the like coin, but for
less than eight pieces Beetham sent not the _Mangle_ forth among the
inhabitants of the land.
24 And behold all the people rejoiced extremely and the fame of the
Mangle was spread abroad among all the isles of Britain even to the
remotest part thereof; and the ships of the sea were laden with the
same machines to the Colonies abroad, and in all those parts of the
Earth where Economy is an object, where Convenience is desirable, and
where Cleanliness is esteemed next to Godliness.
* * * * *
_Mr. BEETHAM’s_
NEW PATENT PORTABLE WASHING MILL
IS so universally used and Economical, that it deserves the serious
attention of the Public in general.
1 It renders the linen whiter and cleaner than it can be made by any
other method.
2 It will wash more in one hour than ten women can in the same time.
3 It is so saving, that for Five Shillings it will wash as much as
will cost One Guinea in the common mode.
4 The price of the Mill is very soon cleared by what it saves in soap,
coals, manual labour and the preservation of the linen.
This invaluable invention may be seen from Eleven until Two every day.
A Mill large enough to wash 8 shirts 4l. 4s. 14, 4l. 14s. 6d. 18, 5l.
5s. 24, 6l. 6s.
One to first and second, 10l. 10s. Wringer, 1l. 1s.
This Beetham was the grandfather, on her mother’s side, of Miss Reed,
the celebrated old lady of Stamford Street, whose houses were for many
years in a notoriously dismantled and dilapidated condition, and who
not very long since left a hundred thousand pounds to the Brompton
Hospital. Her mother was a pupil of Opie’s, and before she married Mr
Reed, a solicitor, some of her pictures were exhibited as those of her
master. She late in life became eccentric, but not to such an extent as
her daughter, whose name was at one time almost a household word.
Another tradesman of the City, who was well known for his devotion to
the art of advertising, early in the present century put forth this,
which is rather magniloquent, considering the subject which forms its
basis:--
MAY THE WINGS OF EXTRAVAGANCE _be clipped by the Scissars of
Economy_--was the constant toast of a person who knew very well the
value of a sixpence. To all good economists would Romanis wish to be
recommended, though but a bad practitioner himself, (he is a little
like the clergy--“Don’t do as I do, but as I tell you to do.”) When
you want real good Stockings at a low price, come to the Sign of the
Regent, 33 in Cheapside--there you have them in perfection, and I am
certain sixpence in a pair is worth saving; and any one that is
possest of the least spark of parsimony will give their assent.
Frugality is certainly a good thing--it enables a people to pay
taxes--to pay their armies--to thrash the French--to make peace on
good terms--to extend commerce--to make people live long and
comfortable:
FOR STOCKINGS
Romanis against the whole World, at his Mart, 33 Cheapside.
From small beginnings great events arise--only see what benefit to the
nation as well as to private individuals accrued from the purchase of
cheap stockings. Romanis has never been mentioned in conjunction with
Wellington, yet he seems to have had a good deal to do towards building
up the victory of Waterloo, and ought to have been remembered, say as
much as Blucher, who has been immortalised in the way of boots while the
stocking-seller has been clean forgotten.
Another curious advertiser was William Hall of Lynn, who flourished
early in the present century. According to Hone, Hall was a celebrated
antiquarian bookseller, and received the alias of Will Will-be-So. He
was also an auctioneer, and on the market-day he would knock down his
lots in great style, and with many whimsical remarks. He had a craze for
verse, and in such as follows all his advertisements were written:--
LYNN, 19_th_ SEPTEMBER, 1810.
First Tuesday in the next October,
Now do not doubt but we’ll be sober!
If Providence permits us action,
You may depend upon
_AN AUCTION_,
At the stall
That’s occupied by WILLIAM HALL.
To enumerate a task would be--
The best way is to come and see;
But not to come too vague an errand,
We’ll give a sketch which we will warrant.
About _one hundred books_, in due lots,
And pretty near the same in _shoe-lasts_;
_Coats_, _waistcoats_, _breeches_, shining _buttons_,
Perhaps ten thousand _leather cuttings_,
Sold at per pound--your lot but ask it,
Shall be weighed to you in a basket;
Some lot of _tools_ to make a try on,
About one hundred-weight of _iron_;
_Scales_, _earthenware_, _arm-chairs_, a _tea-urn_,
_Tea-chests_, a _herring-tub_, and so on;
With various more that’s our intention,
Which are too tedious here to mention.
N.B.--To undeceive, ’fore you come nigher,
The duty charged upon the buyer;
And, should we find we’re not perplext,
We’ll keep it up the Tuesday next.
We have two more specimens of the English peculiar to Continentalists,
the first being of about the same period as Hall’s verse. It is an exact
copy of a card circulated by the landlord of an hotel at Ghent:--
Mr. Dewitt, in the Golden Apple, out of the Bruges Gate at Ghent, has
the honour to prevent the Persons who would come at his house, that
they shall find there always good and spacious Lodgings, a Table
served at their taste, Wine of any quality, etc. Besides he hires
Horses and Chaises, which shall be of a great conveniency for the
Travellers; the Bark of Bruges depart and arrives every day before his
door. He dares flatter himself, that they shall be satisfied, as well
with the cheapness of the price, as with the cares such an
establishment requires.
This and the next, which was given to the world in 1822, may cause
English people who fancy they have the most correct knowledge of French,
as well as the true Parisian accent, to be a little cautious in their
belief, for there is no doubt that the authors of both notices were very
strong on their powers of “spiking the English,” as many French
announcements have it:--
M. MARLOTEAU et Cie.
_Manufacturers from Paris,_
37, MONTMORENCY-STREET,
_To London 14 Broad Street, Oxford street_.
Acquaint the Trade in general, that they have just established in
LONDON.
A Warhouse for FRENCH FLOWERS, for each Season, feathar from hat
ladies of their own Manufacture elegant fans of the NEWEST TASTE.
And of Manufactures of PARIS, complette sets ornaments for balls,
snuff boxes scale gold and silver, boxes toilette, ribbons and
embroidered, hat et cap, from Ladies of the newest Taste, China, all
sorts, etc.
He commit generally the articles from Paris, Manufacturers.
And send in all BRITISH CITY.
Attandance from Nine o’Clock in the Morning till five in the
Afternoon.
Before and during the year 1825 a man used to stand at the corner of
Fleet Market, and deliver handbills in the interest of a society which
had for its object the genteel and comfortable interment of its members.
One of these advertisements has been preserved, and a copy of it is
appended. Its commencement is curious, and must at times have somewhat
disconcerted incautious readers, who in the midst of their business
cares or pleasure pursuits suddenly had the notice of death thrust upon
them. Sir Thomas Browne, who professed to know all about mortality, says
that “man is a noble animal, splendid in ashes, and pompous in the
grave.” Whoever drew up the handbill was certainly aware of the craving
which exists in many minds, especially among the lower orders, for a
good funeral, and made abundant provision for it. Really a _tædium vitæ_
almost creeps over one upon reading it. Who would not be willing to die,
in death to be attended as is promised? Two rows all round of
close-drove best black japanned nails feelingly invite and almost
irresistibly persuade us to come and be screwed down. What aching head
can resist the temptation to repose presented by the handsome crape
shroud, the cap, and pillow? What sting is there in death which handles
with wrought gripes are not calculated to pluck away? What victory in
the grave which the drops and the velvet pall do not render at least
extremely disputable? And, above all, a pretty emblematic plate, with
the angel above and the flower beneath, is utterly irresistible. But we
in our rhapsody had forgotten to copy the bill:--
BURIAL SOCIETY.
A favourable opportunity now offers to any person, of either sex, who
would wish to be buried in a genteel manner, by paying one shilling
entrance, and twopence per week for the benefit of the stock. Members
to be free in six months. The money to be paid at Mr. Middleton’s at
the sign of “the First and Last,” Stonecutter Street, Fleet Market.
The deceased to be furnished as follows: a strong elm coffin, covered
with superfine black, and finished with two rows, all round, close
drove, best black japanned nails, and adorned with ornamental drops, a
handsome plate of inscription, angel above, and flower beneath, and
four pair of handsome handles, with wrought gripes; the coffin to be
well pitched, lined, and ruffled with fine crape; a handsome crape
shroud, cap, and pillow. For use, a handsome velvet pall, three
gentlemen’s cloaks, three crape hatbands, three hoods and scarfs, and
six pair of gloves; two porters equipped to attend the funeral, a man
to attend the same with band and gloves; also the burial fees paid, if
not exceeding one guinea.
The notice further informed the public, that though the society had only
been established a very few years, upwards of eleven hundred persons had
put down their names. It is worthy of remark that so many people of the
industrious classes should have clubbed their twopences to avoid what
they considered the disgrace of a parish funeral, and should doubtless
have rejoiced when their six months had expired, and they stood face to
face with the handsome velvet pall and etceteras. The very poor are to
this day very particular about their funerals, and many a savoury morsel
is the living body deprived of that the lifeless one may go comfortably
to its last home. A labouring man’s greatest pride often is that he gave
wife, parent, or child a good funeral; and this feeling is perfectly
independent of the wake peculiarities and festivities that obtain among
a certain section of the lower orders. Readers must be warned against an
idea which they may be apt to form about the place whence these
proposals issued. From the sign of the “First and Last,” they might
conclude that Mr Middleton was a publican who, in assembling a club of
the above description at his house, had a view to his own interest
altogether foreign to the purpose for which the society was instituted.
Mr Middleton was no publican, though he hung out a sign, but an honest
undertaker, who also dealt in wicker ware, and who, by the exhibition of
both cradle and coffin as a device, attracted attention to which the
motto “First and Last” contributed in no small measure.
The following humorous handbill was about 1825 given away by a publican
in the neighbourhood of the Strand. It is certainly a gem in its way,
and shows an originality which was more likely to have been possessed by
one of the needy and seedy customers hanging about in the vicinity of
the theatres fifty years back, than by the well-fed, well-clad, and
probably bumptious “bung,” who ought to have made the writer free of his
various entertainments during the long “run” they doubtless obtained if
the performance was in any way as good as the programme:--
_Licensed by Act of Parliament._
And under the immediate Patronage of the Public.
THEATRE OF EPICUREAN VARIETY
at the
KING OF PRUSSIA
Wych Street.
W. Trampton has the honor of informing his friends and the public that
his compact comfortable snug and _cosey_ little Theatre is now open
for the Winter Season; where from the well known excellence of the
company engaged he trusts to meet with a share of that encouragement
it will be his endeavour to merit and his pride to acknowledge.
A peculiar advantage attending this Theatre will no doubt be justly
appreciated by the public, namely that tickets of admission may be had
for the separate branches of the entertainment, the price of which
together with the hours of performance are specified in the following
bill:--
_During the Week the following Entertainments will be presented._
A favourite Burletta in One Act, called
SOMETHING LIKE BREAKFAST.
The chief characters by the celebrated foreign performers,
Signiors TEA COFFEE SUGAR etc.
Price of admission 10d. Hours from 8 to 10 A.M.
_After which, a Bagatelle, or Interlude in One Act, called_
IF YOU LIKE IT, LUNCH IT.
The characters by
Messrs CHESCHIRE GLOUCESTER CRUST
KIDNEY RAREBIT etc.
And other well known Performers who will be found ever ready at
the call of the Public.
_At the Hour of three P.M. a Grand Melodrama in two Acts called_
HOW SHALL I DINE?
The chief Character on Monday by the celebrated old Roscius
of the Epicurean Stage,
ROAST BEEF.
The other Characters by the celebrated _Murphys_ etc., assisted by
the _Little Pickles_ etc.
Guards, Messrs _Cayenne_ etc. Scenery by Messrs _Diaper and
Assistants_. Dresses by _Mrs Cook_.
Music (a _joint_ composition of _Handel_ and _Stick_) by Messrs _Knife
and Fork_.
Price of Admission One Shilling.
The principal Character in the above-mentioned Piece will be sustained
by different Actors of celebrity during the week, viz.
Tuesday _Boiled Mutton_, Wednesday _Roast or Boiled Pork_, Thursday
_Veal and Bacon_, Friday _Boiled Beef_, Saturday _Roast Mutton_.
At Eight P.M. every evening the well known eccentric Pat Murphy (in
company with his friend Pat Butter) will have the honour of making his
appearance in his much admired hot-jacket of brown.
_Theatre closed every Evening at half past Eleven._
N.B. A stout and venerable white-headed Porter from the office of
Messrs Goodwyn & Co. will attend the Theatre for the purpose of
keeping good order during the performance.
_The whole got up under the immediate care of_
Stage Manager _W. Trampton_.
Between forty and fifty years ago there was an amusing contest going on
between two tradespeople in the City: both were hairdressers, and lived
opposite each other. Seeing that the one throve by selling pomade made
of bear’s grease, the other, knowing that it was just as good and more
profitable to sell any other material in pots with “bear’s grease” on
the label, started in opposition, using similar pots to those sold by
his opponent, filled with an inexpensive unguent. The first dealer, who
was known to keep bears in his cellar, and who had himself taken up once
a week before the sitting alderman as a nuisance, by way of
advertisement, killed a bear upon this, and hung him up whole in full
sight in his shop. He also wrote in the window, “A fresh bear killed
this day!” The other, who had but one bear in all the world, which he
privately led out of his house after dark every night, and brought him
back in the morning (to seem like a new supply going on), continued his
sale, and announced in his window, “Our fresh bear will be killed
to-morrow.” The original vendor then, determined to cut off his rival’s
last shift, kept his actual bears, defunct, with the skins only half
off, like calves at a butcher’s, hanging up always at his door,
proclaimed that “all bear’s grease sold in pots was a vile imposture,”
and desired his customers to walk in “and see theirs with their own
eyes, cut and weighed from the animal.” This seemed conclusive for two
days; but on the third, the cunning opposition was again to the fore,
with a placard “founded on the opinion of nine doctors of physic,” which
stated that bear’s grease “obtained from the animal in a tamed or
domesticated state, will not make anybody’s hair grow at all.” In
consequence of which, he went on to say, “he has formed an establishment
in Russia (where all the best bears come from), for catching them wild,
cutting the fat off immediately, and potting it down for London
consumption.” And the rogue actually ruined the business of his
antagonist, without going to the expense of killing a single bear, by
writing all over his house, “Licensed by the Imperial Government--Here,
and at Archangel.”
George Robins, the auctioneer, was a profound believer in the value of
advertisements, and exercised all his ingenuity and ability, both of
which were considerable, to devise fresh schemes for attracting public
notice. His powers of producing a good bill were remarkable, as was also
his facility of description. Robins’s style has been so often commented
upon, and his work so often copied and burlesqued, that it is hardly
worth while our touching upon either him or his bills. As, however, such
a book as this would be hardly complete without a reference to the
puffing genius of modern days, we select a portion--and only a portion,
mind--of his description of the Colosseum in Regent’s Park, one of the
greatest failures of speculative enthusiasts known, which, despite
Robins and his panegyric, and despite the strenuous efforts which have
been made to cultivate an unwilling populace into believing in it as a
place of amusement, is now being demolished to make way for a set of
dwelling-houses planned upon the site on which was reared the building
described by the poetically-fancied auctioneer as, among many other
things, a
=CYCLOPÆAN STRUCTURE=,
WHERE DESCRIPTION FAILS TO PORTRAY
“Its eloquent proportions,
Its mighty graduations,”
WHICH, EVEN WHEN SEEN,
“Thou seest not all, but piecemeal thou must break,
To separate contemplation, the great whole.”
THE EXQUISITE PROPORTIONS OF
=THE CLASSIC PORTICO=,
One of the finest specimens of
=THE GREEK DORIC=,
TOGETHER WITH
“The Dome, the vast and wondrous Dome,”
WHICH PROUDLY
“-----------------------------Vies
In air with earth’s chief structures,”
Win our admiration, while there is nothing of ancient or modern days
that can compete with it either in
^Classic Elegance, Grandeur of Effect, or Beauty of Proportion;^
And it must remain to future ages a monument of the genius of the
architect, as an
“Outshining and o’erwhelming edifice.”
The stupendous purpose for which the COLOSSEUM was erected is too
well known to need description.
=THOUSANDS AND TENS OF THOUSANDS=
Having been attracted by
THE PICTURE OF LONDON,
Which covers the interior of the external wall,
=THE MODERN BABYLON=,
Which occupied the artist upwards of four years in delineating its
endless details from the dome of St. Paul’s at the quiet hour of
morning, when the buildings of this great metropolis were unobscured
by smoke, and the early mists dispersed by the sun’s vicegerent
power,--this picture now
“Stands within the Colosseum’s wall.”
THE BUILDING CONTAINS
=A GRAND SALOON OF ART=,
Surrounding the interior of the whole edifice,
“All musical in its immensities,
Rich marbles--richer painting--”
Stored with productions of modern artists, models of ingenious
machinery, and a variety of scientific experiments to attract the
spectator, and is well calculated for any and every exhibition of an
extensive nature.
“Enter--------------thy mind,
Expanded by the genius of the spot,
Has grown colossal!”
On the outside of the main building are magnificent Conservatories
filled with every kind of exotic, and decorated with
_FOUNTAINS AND JETS D’EAU_,
Equalling in beauty the most celebrated
^Fountains of Versailles & St. Eldefonso^.
=Two Thousand Eight Hundred Persons=
HAVE PAID FOR ADMISSION DURING ONE DAY
To view this extraordinary and incomparable work of art.
=THE COLOSSEUM’S GRANDEUR=
ENCOMPASSED THEM WITH WONDER--A SUBLIME
CREATIVE SPIRIT IN THIS WORLD OF MIRACLES.
It may be well to observe that continued success will be rendered
certain by a change of scene, and the purchaser has
only to call to his aid
=THE MAGIC INFLUENCE OF STANFIELD’S PENCIL=
To create a new sensation, and enlist thousands to partake of the
refreshing delight created by his versatile and unrivalled talent.
Indeed, it will not be requisite to tax ingenuity very greatly to
think of an infinite variety of ways by which a large fortune may be
made. It has for years past produced from
=Three to Five Thousand Pounds a Year=,
And this without any artificial aid, or so much of industry and tact
as this wonderful building seems especially to have invited.
Robins’s eloquence very often led him to describe things as they were
not, and now and again he had to recant and make amends. He is generally
credited with having referred to a gallows which stood upon part of an
estate, as a unique and elegant hanging wood, and thereby obtaining a
considerably larger sum for the property than it was in any way worth.
Among Robins’s many eccentricities this must not be reckoned, as the
hanging-wood episode, though true in itself, belongs to an earlier time,
the trick having been played during the last century. When a man gets
credit for the possession of any peculiarity, every story that can be
raked up of a suitable kind takes him for its originator or leading
spirit, and innumerable tales were at one time current with regard to
the great auctioneer, of which he was perfectly innocent. So it is in
other things. What did Foote, Garrick, Sheridan, Hook, Sydney Smith,
Hood, Barham, Rogers, Jerrold, and numerous other of our celebrated
wits, know of a quarter the sayings and doings that have been ascribed
to them? Little indeed, we fancy. But there are some things which Robins
did say and do which have not been recorded. In answer to a lady who
remarked to him that in his graphic descriptions he must have used up
the entire dictionary, Robins said, “Madam, I’ll give five pounds to any
charitable society you like to name if you can find me a word I have not
used.” Mrs Macauley might have taken him at his word, and would
doubtless have won the money, but the lady we speak of declined the
contest. There is not much in this, except as showing to what an extent
his powers of description led him. Having given one of his sayings, we
will conclude with an item from his doings, a description of the villa
and garden of W. Harrison, Esq., Q.C. We trust we shall cause no one to
be discontented with his or her present abode by giving this
description--rather do we hope that one of the new race of picturesque
reporters may be tempted by it to study under Robins, and thereby
improve his condition:--
In attempting an adequate representation of what has been aptly
termed
=A LITTLE HEAVEN UPON EARTH=,
Much of the difficulty Mr. ROBINS feared to encounter he is happily
relieved from by the extraordinary renown which the late worthy
possessor has imparted to this incomparable retreat.
“Thus far we sail before the wind,”
Exclaims the individual who is flattered by having been selected for
this interesting Sale, but fear and trembling now succeeds in
encountering the Herculean task of pourtraying the countless beauties
that are congregated
=Within the Grounds of this Elysium=.
It would puzzle much higher talent than he can bring, adequately to
describe this Landscape, but it must be attempted; and Mr. ROBINS
prays that the reader will bear with him a little longer, under the
assurance that condensity shall be his motto, at the same time
avoiding that cloudy region entered by the witty Flaccus, who,
“Aiming at brevity became obscure.”
_THE GROUNDS_
Extend to near Five Acres, and the extraordinary tact that must have
presided in arriving at this scene of perfection, must be viewed, it
must be seen to feel and appreciate what seems to partake of Fairy
Land. Mr. LOUDON has indulged the public with Twenty-two Vignettes and
Plans to hand down to posterity a faint idea of
=The Velvet Ornamental lawn=,
On which is congregated the most rare and extensive assemblage of
Plants and flowering Shrubs that is to be met with in England.
From all
THE FLORICULTURAL EXHIBITIONS
The treasures were quite sure to find a home at Cheshunt, indeed the
late Proprietor’s judgment in the Cultivation of Rare and Valuable
Plants was quite unique, and his Gardener, Mr. PRATT, a prototype of
his employer. It would fatigue the reader to give in detail the host
of Rare Plants that adorn these Grounds, the value of which is past
belief--more than a Thousand Pounds have been consumed alone in rare
Exotics; the masses of Growing Plants, the French Garden, and all this
(by the way) is relieved and varied by
=THE ORNAMENTAL WATERS AND ISLAND=,
Varying and necessarily improving this beauteous scene. Perpetual
breaks and peeps are contrived, by different views, to look on the
Waters, in which Thousands of Gold and Silver Fish enjoy their
“sportive gambols.” Correct judgment is made very manifest in the
disposition of these Grounds, by avoiding the whole being seen, except
by slow degrees. Then there are dispersedly dotted about throughout
the Lawn--The Rustic Alcoves, the Chinese Temple, Grottos, and covered
Seats, Orchidaceus and Fern Houses, and Aviary.
A Mount is devoted to the Show of Aloes during the Summer, rendering
the _ensemble_ most captivating; a Hermit’s Cave, covered with Ivy; a
Gravel Walk, belted by American Borders of Rare Plants; a beautiful
Grotto, adorned by a fine piece of Statuary; a Rustic Summer House,
fitted up in the Indian style; a smaller Grotto, fitted in Stone, of
grotesque and rustic masonry; in fact, everything that sagacity or the
human mind could well conceive, seems to have been achieved here, to
render this spot
=A PERFECT PARADISE.=
From the Terrace Walk that environs it, a perpetually interesting
scene of the Lawn, in varied forms of beauty (the Church Steeple
peeping out in the distance, to vary the scene) is disclosed, and is
so ingeniously and cleverly managed that the deciduous Trees, during
the Summer, afford constant protection from the heat of the sun, and
during the Winter (being then naked) admit the genial warmth of the
sun to keep dry the Gravel Walks.
From the canny North Country we get two bills, the first of which is
likely to shake the belief of those who imagine that swindlers and
impostors have little chance in the border counties, where the babies
are said to be born with their wisdom teeth ready cut, and to “know
their way about” before they are out of leading-strings. J. A. was fully
possessed of his share of artfulness, and though his name has not come
down to us, it being just the same in the bill as here printed, his
initials were well known some years back, and his practice was very
successful:--
THE WHOLE ART OF FORTUNE-TELLING,
BY J----n A----k, BARTON.
* * * * *
_Deep in the dismal Regions, void of Light,
Three Witches, for Consultation, meet to Night;
So, sacred Sisters, your secret Mysteries state,
The Witches leaders, and their great Powers relate._
* * * * *
WHO begs most respectfully to acquaint his Friends that he has, for
the Benefit of the Public, commenced the above Business; and, from the
long Time he had studied under the different Masters of the Magical
Mysteries in the present Age, also, in all the ancient and modern
Books, in Astrology, Nicromancy, Divinations, and all the magical
Charms, Spells, Rites, Enchantments, and hidden Mysteries in past and
future Events, flatters himself that he has become Proficient in his
Art.
Hail, Medea, hail! if still he scorn the Spell,
By Fate, I’ll force him to the Gates of Hell!
Such potent Sorceries an Assyrian taught,
As to a magic Charm the Drugs he wrought.
J. A. can break any Charm caused by Enchantment; can also immediately
name the Planet under which a Person is born; and will also inform any
Person whether he or she will be married, and to whom; and can inform
all married Men, to their Satisfaction, in all the secret Transactions
which they may suppose to have taken place with their Wives; can also
conjure back any stolen Goods, and bewitch any Person or Animal who
has done any one an Injury, &c. &c.
Hail, Hecate! and give my rising Spell
Ev’n Appollonius’s Sorceries to excel:
Bid my strong Witchery match ev’n Circe’s Skill,
O’er the dire Rites,--my Mysteries fulfil.
J. A. also begs to add that he has not spared any Expence to make
himself Master of all the magical Mysteries, and is confident of his
own Abilities in being able to give every Satisfaction to those who
may favour him with a Consultation will meet with due Attention, but
their Letters must be post-paid, inclosing a Post-office Order for 5s.
The Age of the Applicant must be stated. Persons attending will be
charged 2s. only. J. A. is also a Dealer in Talismanick Charms,
engraved with magical Characters, 10s. 6d. each.
A man who commences a sorcery business for the benefit of the public
deserves to succeed, especially when he can break any charm caused by
enchantment, conjure back stolen goods, and so play the avenger’s part
as to bewitch any person or animal who has done any one an injury. It is
a pity J. A. did not get some of his mysterious agents to put his lines
a little in order. The other is a Tyneside advertisement, and shows also
a partiality for verse--indeed consists of nothing else, if we except
the name and address; but its theme is far more material than that of
its companion. Unlike in the case of the publican of Wych Street, we
will not assume that Mr Catcheside employed any one over the following
effusion, of which he is welcome to all the credit:--
JOHN CATCHESIDE,
GROCER & TEA-DEALER,
BIGG-MARKET,
_NEWCASTLE_.
YE gentlemen of town and country,
A shop, next door to Whitfield’s entry,
Is just fit up for your inspection,
By Mr Catcheside’s direction;
Good ladies, too, I crave your favours,--
To please you shall be my endeavours.
Without the fairer sex are pleas’d,
The mind of man is never eas’d.
But ladies, pray, and gentlemen,
Call, and I’ll please you if I can.
I’ve Teas of all sorts you can mention--
To keep them good is my intention:
All from the India-house direct,
Warranted genuine you may expect;
Which I do sell on lowest terms,
And not as gentlemen let farms;
I’ve Sugars too, the same to sweeten,
As good as ever yet were eaten;
Loaves, well refin’d as ’ere you saw,
Which boiling water scarce will thaw.
I’ve Treacle, Juice, and Sugar-Candy,
And Turkey Coffee strong as brandy;
The very best Plantation ditto,
With Fry’s and White’s best Patent Cocoa,
And Churchman’s Patent Chocolate,--
All which I sell at a low rate.
I’ve fine Tobacco, Patent Shag,
Twist, Saffron Cut, and Common Rag;
And Snuff, whatever kind you choose,
To clear your brain, and warm your nose;
Zant Currants, commonly call’d Spice,
Orange and Lemon Peel, and Rice;
Malaga Raisins, too, I sell,
With Bloom, and Sun, and Muscatell,
With which you well may stuff your wigs;
Or here’s French Plumbs, or Turkey Figs;
Or Prunes, if you do think them fitter,
With Almonds, Jordan, Shell, and Bitter;
Nutmegs, Cloves, Cinnamon, and Mace,
Good as you’ll get at any place;
Season your syllabubs and custards;
For beef, I’ve Vinegar and Mustards.
All kinds of Pepper, too, I’ll sell ye,
Macaroni and Vermacelli;
Anchovies, Cassia, and Cassia-buds,
And many other sorts of goods,
Prepar’d for puddings, pies, and sauces:--
Come, buy them cheap, ye bonny lasses!
And if your birds for seeds do gape,
I have Canary, Hemp, and Rape;
And further down you need not wander
For Annis, Carraway, and Coriander;
Of Ginger, too, I’m never scant,
For any purpose you may want.
I’ve Sago fine, and Capers both,
And famous Barley for your broth!
Salt Petre, Bay and Basket Salt,
To make your hams without a fault;
With Picked Isinglass and Staple,
To make your ale fit for the table:--
Then what can man desire more,
Than beef, and broth, and ale in store?
But dinner’s done; come, draw the table,
Here’s Soap to wash while you are able;
But if you think that will not do,
Here’s Poland Starch and Powder Blue;
And if you’d have some coarser washes,
I have good Pearl and Comby Ashes;
Should you incline to wash by night,
I’ve Candles, too, will shew you light.
To spin dry wool you need not toil,
I’ve plenty Whale and Florence Oil.
Set by your wheels, your tongs, and poker
And paint your nooks with Yellow Ochre.
Put all your dye-pots to one side,
When with fresh Indigo supplied;
Then paint above your lintel-head
And chimney-pieces with Black-Lead.
If still materials you do lack,
I’ve Fuller’s Earth and Ivory Black,
Logwood, Copperas, and Whiting,
Yea many more things not worth writing.
Once more your favours I solicit,
I’m ready waiting for a visit;
Most due attendance will be given
From seven at morn till eight at even;
Or later, if it seems expedient,
By your most humble and obedient,
JOHN CATCHESIDE.
Getting back to London, we come upon a bill of the kind now and then
adopted with regard to posters, the idea in which is to convey a
different notion at sight from that which is given by close inspection.
In the following the plan has been carried out with great nicety, the
author’s endeavour being to make the notice look like a Government
proclamation, and as one of the best specimens of the kind we have ever
seen it is presented to the reader:--
[Illustration: V. R.]
_PROCLAMATION!_
^Whereas^,
It being Our Royal Will and Pleasure that our well-beloved, trusty and
loyal subject HARRY JOHNSON, should for the Amusement of our
well-beloved, trusty and loyal subjects of Hoxton and its Vicinity,
give a grand entertainment on ASH WEDNESDAY, the 9th of February,
1842, for the BENEFIT of Himself, when he trusts from the Talent he
has selected on this occasion, and the well-known respectability and
celebrity of all parties, he cannot fail of securing a TREAT
TO THE
_=British Public=_.
H. J. feels proud and happy to announce that many Professional Friends
have, in the most handsome manner, proffered their valuable Services:
they are enabled to do this with greater facility as no other Place of
Amusement in London is open on that Evening. Their Names will
transpire in future bills. Miss PHILLIPS will on this night sing, in
her usual sweet and inimitable style,
_WANTED_
=A GOVERNESS=
The Beneficiare will also sing,
FOR THE
First time, the Young
=PRINCE OF WALES=.
A Gentleman has kindly consented on this occasion to sing an Entire
New Comic Song, to be called “Comfort is all my View; or
SALARY
Is no object!!” Mr. H. PARKER will also sing his much admired ballad
of Had I
=£1,000 A-YEAR!!!=
A Lady will sing
NO FOLLOWERS ALLOWED.
ALL APPLICATIONS TO BE MADE (FOR TICKETS) ON OR BEFORE
ASH WEDNESDAY, FEBRU. 9, 1842,
AT THE OFFICE
ROYAL BRITANNIA SALOON, HOXTON OLD TOWN.
=_The Ceremony of_ IN-STALL-ING _to commence
at Half Past_ SIX _o’clock Precisely_.=
GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!!!
The attention of readers will probably be attracted by the advertisement
so elaborately concocted and carefully worked out. If its promoters
received any extra support because of it, they certainly deserved what
they got, as the plan is difficult to connect with any but large bills.
The next item we have brings us to the year 1853, and is again from the
county of Northumberland. It is far more pretentious than the
composition of Mr John Catcheside, but by no means so successful. It is
from the pen of a general shopkeeper, who evidently considered he had
done something when he had been through his proofs, seen this to press,
and forwarded copies to unsuspecting, and, as it turned out,
unsympathising, families about G----, a small place not very far from
Newcastle:--
_To the inhabitants of G---- and its neighbourhood._
The present age is teeming with advantages which no preceding era in
the history of mankind has afforded to the human family. New schemes
are projecting to enlighten and extend civilisation, Railways have
been projected and carried out by an enterprising and spirited nation,
while Science in its gigantic power (simple yet sublime) affords to
the human mind so many facilities to explore its rich resources, the
Seasons roll on in their usual course producing light and heat, the
vivifying rays of the sun and the fructifying influences of nature
producing food and happiness to the Sons of Toil, while to the people
of G---- and its neighbourhood a rich and extensive variety of
Fashionable Goods is to be found in my Warehouse, which have just been
selected with the greatest care. The earliest visit is requested to
convey to the mind an adequate idea of the great extent of his
purchases, comprising, as it does, all that is elegant and useful,
cheap and substantial to the light-hearted votaries of Matrimony, the
Matrons of Reflection, the Man of Industry, and the Disconsolate
Victims of Bereavement.
This composition having been printed and distributed, the author waited
impatiently for its powerful effect, and when to his great astonishment
he discovered that it had produced none, he, with the irritability that
nearly always accompanies neglected genius, resolved to get back and
destroy every copy of his essay, and thereby deny to posterity what his
own generation could not appreciate. Fortunately for ourselves, and for
ages yet unborn, a copy was preserved, and printed in _Notes and
Queries_.
Most dwellers for any time in London remember Lord Chief Baron Nicholson
and his Judge and Jury Society, which used to be held at the Coal Hole
in the Strand. Virtuous readers may shudder at the mention of such a
place; but time was when the deliberations and decisions of the jury, as
well as the directions of the judge and the peculiarities of the
witnesses, were productive of mirth independent of _double entendre_
among an audience composed of anything but roysterers and howling cads.
In such halcyon days, when Nicholson was in the flesh, looking much more
like a chief baron than nine-tenths of the possessors of the title ever
did, the following handbill was printed:--
The Lord Chief Baron
NICHOLSON
Begs to inform his best friends, the Public, that he and the learned
Gentlemen of the JUDGE AND JURY SOCIETY, have left the Garrick’s Head
in Bow Street, and now hold their Forensic Sittings at the celebrated
COAL HOLE TAVERN, Fountain Court, Strand, every Evening.
A JUDGE!--and in a Coal Hole too!
Quoth rustic John, I can’t believe thee.
That sounds too funny to be true,
Come NICHOLSON, now don’t deceive me.
I wont deceive thee in the path,
So at the ancient Coal Hole meet me,
BLACKSTONE and COKE burn on the hearth,
And LAW flares up, my lad, to greet thee.
DO NOT FORGET TO REMEMBER
THE COAL HOLE
IN THE STRAND.
Law was the proprietor of the establishment, and he “flared up” to some
tune, so far as the production of suppers required flaring. And suppers
were both numerous and excellent at the Coal Hole; the stewed or
scalloped oyster, the devilled kidney, the broiled bone, and the modest
“rabbit” receiving considerable attention during the progress of the
mock trials. Subsequently the Coal Hole became a resort for journalists
and actors, who used to be admitted to a snug old room behind the bar;
but all that is changed now, an ambitious landlord having modernised the
place and driven forth its old _habitués_. Not by violence or through
incivility, but by means of plate-glass, electro tankards, and other
goods, the unwonted and unwelcome aspect of which has made wanderers of
the old warm-hearted coterie. Why will people “restore” and improve the
few comfortable old taverns still left about London, and drive honest
folk from the snug and unpretending corners they have occupied for
years? This same restoration is shortsighted and impolitic. The houses
become nondescript; they are too modern, and perhaps too respectable,
for the old customers, not glaring and gassy enough for the new; and so
they stand, with just sufficient about them to remind us of the joys
that are past, and not enough to tempt us to renew them in the future.
Turning from taverns, coal-holey and otherwise, we have finally to
notice that kind of advertising which is the result of an attempt to
make profit out of others’ misfortunes. At the time, but a very few
years back, of the Overend and Gurney failure, an enterprising
linen-draper in the North-West district of London put forth the
following handbill (p. 555), which was of large size, surrounded by a
thick black mourning border, and which, in addition to being given away,
was sent about by post. For reasons which are obvious, we have changed
the names, and have no hesitation in giving an opinion that the
proceeding was a very sharp bit of business, worthy of the hero of the
wooden nutmegs.
It was followed by a long list of the goods to be sold, with the market
prices and those at which they were offered, the practice of making up
two sets of figures on goods having been found very efficacious of late
years. This brings us well up to the present time, and as that is quite
capable of taking care of itself without any assistance from us, we will
conclude, in the hope that, though we have perforce passed many
interesting specimens by, our selection, considering the space at
command, has not been in any way injudicious.
The Overend Gurney & Co. Disaster.
LAMENTABLE CASE OF RUIN AND DEATH.
=THE “STANDARD” of the 29th ultimo, truly observes--=
“=Difficult indeed would it be to exaggerate the extent of the
mischief that was done by the fall of the great house which had for
generations stood firm as a rock * * * * nor would it be easy to
adequately describe the woe and desolation, the loss and ruin,
consequent upon the suspension and disastrous liquidation of the
Company.=”
A more distressing case than the one in question it is impossible to
conceive.--It is briefly told.--An old-established Linen Draper of the
City of London, (Mr. JOB HUCKABACK), had invested the Savings of a
life-time in the Overend Gurney Scheme. The result is known. Still his
Business remained, and he might have struggled on, but further calls
being imminent, his last hope was crushed, so, Bankrupt and
broken-hearted, he died,--leaving a wife and five young children to
the mercy of fate.--
The Trade Creditors have done what they can by waiving all claims upon
the Estate, and have generously resolved that the Stock shall be sold
for the benefit of the Widow and Children.
THE STOCK, WHICH IS HIGHLY CHOICE AND
VALUABLE, HAS BEEN ENTRUSTED TO
=MR. CHARLES MARTEL=,
With prompt Orders TO REALISE AT ONCE ON
ANY TERMS.
THE FIRST GRAND SALE OF SELECTED GOODS WILL BE
HELD IN THE
Large Assembly Room of the ---- Hotel, N.W.
(☞ Ladies may avoid passing through the Hotel, by presenting
enclosed Card to Messenger at Private Door.)
On Monday, 1st, Tuesday, 2nd, Wednesday, 3rd,
and Thursday, 4th March,
From Ten a.m. till Dusk each Day, closing on Thursday, at 5 p.m.,
prompt, _not a minute later_.
The Sale will be by Private Treaty, thus affording Ladies leisure to
freely inspect. Although prices are quoted as a guide, NO OFFER WILL
BE REJECTED, AS EVERYTHING MUST BE SOLD IN THE BRIEF TIME SPECIFIED.