"MR. ASQUITH CLEANS THE SLATE."
_Daily Chronicle._
The pity is that so many of his followers seem to prefer to slate the
clean.
* * *
Even _The Nation_ is not quite satisfied with the Government, and has
been alluding to "the extreme slackness of Cabinet methods," and
complains that "situations are not thought out beforehand." The
Government, apparently, is now taking the lesson to heart, for _H.M.S.
Foresight_, we read, has now replaced _H.M.S. Pathfinder in_ Belfast
Lough.
* * *
What the newspapers describe as "An unknown Botticelli" has just been
sold by a celebrated firm of art dealers to an American gentleman, and
it only remains to hope that the painting was not unknown to BOTTICELLI.
* * *
"A telegram from Toledo," says a contemporary, "reports the theft of
three valuable pictures by the celebrated artist, El Greco." There must
be some mistake here. Anyhow, at the time of his death, a good many
years ago, this gentleman was not under suspicion.
* * *
The Christian Endeavour Union of Washington, alarmed at the spread of
luxury, has launched a society whose members pledge themselves to wear
no finery during Easter. Those members who hide baldness by means of
elaborate coiffures might carry the idea further by appearing, for one
week only, with heads like Easter eggs.
* * *
Whether it is due to the Suffrage movement or not it is difficult to
say, but women are undoubtedly coming into their rights by degrees. By
the provisions of the new Bankruptcy Act it is now possible for any
married woman, whether trading apart from her husband or not, to be made
a bankrupt.
* * *
In connection with the "Kensington Camp Week," when an effort is to be
made to raise sufficient funds to establish and equip headquarters for
the Kensington Reservists, a full-sized elephant has been chartered to
ramble about the principal thoroughfares and collect money for the
cause. To ensure success the sagacious quadruped is to be trained to
step accidentally on the toes of those persons who ignore its appeal.
* * *
A correspondent writes to _The Observer_ complaining bitterly of the
state of the morass leading to the Aerodrome at Hendon. This gentleman
does not realise that there is a didactic purpose in the cause of his
annoyance. Learn to fly and you will keep your boots clean.
* * *
[Illustration: _Nut (in car)._ "WHAT'S THAT, KID? 'WHY DON'T I KEEP ON
THE ROAD?' WELL, THE SWEEP MUST BE DEAF--THE BALLY HOOTAH DON'T SHIFT
HIM, AND--WELL, MY DEAR GIRL, THE CAR WAS CLEANED THIS MORNING!"]
* * *
A man has been sentenced at Barmen, Prussia, on three separate counts to
terms of imprisonment totalling 175 years. It is proposed that all the
proprietors of specifics for prolonging life shall be given a free hand
to enable the prisoner to cope with his sentence.
* * *
All German actresses, whether married or single, are, in accordance with
the ruling of the German Theatrical Union of Berlin, to be styled
henceforth "Frau Schauspielerin," _i.e._ "Mrs. Actress." We are
confident that this does not mean that those who are not married ought
to be.
* * *
An advertisement from _The Times_:--"BIG GAME EXPEDITION. Private and
public shooting. Polar bears, musk oxen, walrus and seals arranged."
This is not so easy as it sounds, for, ten to one, as soon as you have
got the beasts arranged one of those plaguey musk oxen will spoil the
whole thing by moving out of its place.
* * *
A remarkable story is being told of the sagacity of a horse belonging to
Captain WATSON, of Ardow, Mull. It lost a shoe, and, managing to get out
of the field where it was grazing, travelled a considerable distance to
a blacksmith, who was astonished to find the horse standing in front of
the door holding up a fore-leg. The horse was shod, and then--we are
afraid the rest of the story makes ugly reading--coolly galloped off
without paying.
* * * * *
"After the annexation of Alsace by Germany the baron stayed some
years in Paris, and became an intimate friend of Chopin."
_Andover Advertiser._
Never realising that CHOPIN had died more than twenty years before.
* * * * *