Helena had gone up-stairs to put David to bed. There was some delay in
the process, because the little boy wished to look at the stars, and
trace out the Dipper. That accomplished however, he was very docile,
and willing to get into bed by shinning up the mast of a
pirate-ship--which some people might have called a bedpost. After he
had fallen asleep, Helena still sat beside him in the darkness, her
absent eyes fixed on the little warm body, where, the sheets kicked
off, he sprawled in a sort of spread-eagle over the bed. It was very
hot, and she would have been more comfortable on the porch, but she
could not leave the child. When she was with David, the sense of aching
apprehension dulled into the comfort of loving. After a while, with a
long sigh she rose, but stopped to draw the sheet over his shoulders;
then smiled to see how quickly he kicked it off. She pulled it up again
as far as his knees, and to this he resigned himself with a despairing
grunt.
There was a lamp burning dimly in the hall; as she passed she took it
up and went slowly down-stairs. Away from David, her thoughts fell at
once into the groove of the past weeks. Each hour she had tormented
herself by some new question, and now she was wondering what she should
do if, when Lloyd came to fulfill his promise, she should see a shade,
oh, even the faintest hint, of hesitation in his manner. Well; she
would meet it! She threw her head up, and came down with a quicker
step, carrying the lamp high, like a torch. But as she lifted her eyes,
in that gust of pride, young Sam Wright stood panting in the doorway.
As his strangled voice fell on her ear, she knew that he knew.
"I have--come--"
Without a word she put the lamp down on the table at the foot of the
stairs, and looked at him standing there with the darkness of the night
behind him. Instantly he was across the threshold and at her side. He
gripped her wrist and shook it, his eyes burning into hers.
"You will tell me that he lied! I told him he lied. I didn't believe
him for a second. I told him I would ask you."
"Please let go of my arm," she said, faintly. "I don't know what you
are--talking about."
"Did he lie?"
"Who?" she stammered.
"My grandfather. He said your brother was not your brother. He said he
was your lover. My God! Your lover! Did he lie?" He shook her arm,
worrying it as a dog might, his nails cutting into her flesh; he
snarled his question out between shut teeth. His fury swept words from
her lips.
She stepped back with a spring of terror, trying to pull her wrist from
his grasp; but he followed her, his dreadful young face close to hers.
She put her other hand behind her, and clutched at the banister-rail of
the stairs. She stared at him in a trance of fright. There was a long
minute of silence.
Then Sam said slowly, as though he were reading it word by word, aloud,
from the open page of her face, "He--did--not--lie." He dropped her
wrist; flung it from him, even, and stood motionless. Again neither of
them spoke. Then Sam drew a long breath. "So, _this_ is life," he said,
in a curiously meditative way. "Well; I have had enough of it." He
turned as he spoke, and went quietly out into the night.
Helena Richie sat down on the lowest step of the stairs. She breathed
in gasps. Suddenly she looked at her arm on which were four deep red
marks; in two places the skin was broken. Upon the fierce pangs of her
mind, flayed and stabbed by the boy's words, this physical pain of
which she had just become conscious, was like some soothing lotion. She
stroked her wrist tenderly, jealous of the lessening smart. She knew
vaguely that she was really wincing lest the smart should cease and the
other agony begin. She looked with blind eyes at the lamp, then got up
and turned the wick down; it had been smoking slightly and a half-moon
of black had settled on the chimney. "Sarah doesn't half look after the
lamps," she said aloud, fretfully--and drew in her lips; the nail-marks
stung. But the red was dying out of them. Yes; the other pain was
coming back. She paled with fright of that pain which was coming;
coming; had come. She covered her face with her hands....
"Who," demanded a sleepy voice, "was scolding?"
Helena looked around quickly; David, in his little cotton
night-drawers, was standing at the head of the stairs.
"Who scolded? I heard 'em," he said, beginning to come down, one little
bare foot at a time; his eyes blinked drowsily at the lamp. Helena
caught him in her arms, and sank down again on the step. But he
struggled up out of her lap, and stood before her. "It's too hot," he
said, "I heard 'em. And I came down. Was anybody scolding you?"
"Yes, David," she said in a smothered voice.
"Were you bad?" David asked with interest.
Helena dropped her forehead on to his little warm shoulder. She could
feel his heart beating, and his breath on her neck.
"Your head's pretty heavy," said David patiently; "and hot."
At that she lifted herself up, and tried to smile; "Come, dear
precious, come up-stairs. Never mind if people scold me. I--deserve it."
"Do you?" said David. "Why?"
He was wide awake by this time, and pleaded against bed. "Tell me why,
on the porch; I don't mind sitting on your lap out there," he bribed
her; "though you are pretty hot to sit on," he added, truthfully.
She could not resist him; to have him on her knee, his tousled head on
her breast, was an inexpressible comfort.
"When I go travelling with Dr. Lavendar," David announced drowsily, "I
am going to put my trousers into the tops of my boots, like George
does. Does God drink out of that Dipper?"
Her doubtful murmur seemed to satisfy him; he shut his eyes, nuzzling
his head into her breast, and as she leaned her cheek on his
hair--which he permitted because he was too sleepy to protest--the ache
of sobs lessened in her throat. After a while, when he was sound asleep
again, she carried him up-stairs and laid him in his bed, sitting
beside him for a while lest he should awake. Then she went down to the
porch and faced the situation....
Sometimes she got up and walked about; sometimes sat down, her elbows
on her knees, her forehead in her hands, one foot tapping, tapping,
tapping. Her first idea was flight: she must not wait for Lloyd; she
must take David and go at once. By to-morrow, everybody would know. She
would write Lloyd that she would await him in Philadelphia. "I will go
to a hotel" she told herself. Of course, it was possible that Sam would
keep his knowledge to himself, as his grandfather had done, but it was
not probable. And even if he did, his knowledge made the place
absolutely unendurable to her; she could not bear it for a day--for an
hour! Yes; she must get off by tomorrow night; and--
Suddenly, into the midst of this horrible personal alarm, came, like an
echo, Sam's last words. The memory of them was so clear that it was
almost as if he uttered them aloud at her side: "Well; I have had
enough of it." Enough of what? Of loving her? Ah, yes; he was cured now
of all that. But was that what he meant? "So this is life.... I have
had enough of it."
Helena Richie leaped to her feet. It seemed to her as if all her blood
was flowing slowly back to her heart. There was no pain now in those
nail-marks; there was no pain in her crushed humiliation. _"I have had
enough of it."..._
Good God! She caught her skirts up in her hand and flew down the steps
and out into the garden. At the gate, under the lacey roof of locust
leaves, she stood motionless, straining her ears. All was still. How
long ago was it that he had rushed away? More than an hour. Oh, no, no;
he could not have meant--! But all the same, she must find him: "_I
have had enough of it_." Under her breath she called his name. Silence.
She told herself distractedly that she was a fool, but a moment later
she fled down the hill. She must find Dr. King; he would know what to
do.
She was panting when she reached his gate, and after she had rung and
was beating upon the door with the palm of her hand, she had to cling
to the knob for support.
"Oh come; oh, hurry! Hurry!" she said, listening to Mrs. King's
deliberate step on the oilcloth of the hall.
"Where is Dr. King?" she gasped, as the door opened; "I want Dr. King!"
Martha, in her astonishment at this white-faced creature with skirts
draggled by the dew and dust of the grass-fringed road, started back,
the flame of the lamp she carried flickering and jumping in the
draught. "What is the matter? Is David--"
"Oh, where is Dr. King? Please--please! I want Dr. King--"
William by this time was in the hall, and when he saw her face he, too,
said:
"David?"
"No. It's--May I speak to you a moment? In the office? I am alarmed
about--something."
She brushed past Mrs. King, who was still gaping at the suddenness of
this apparition from the night, and followed the doctor into the little
room on the left of the passage. Martha, deeply affronted, saw the door
shut in her face.
As for Mrs. Richie, she stood panting in the darkness of the office:
"I am very much frightened. Sam Wright has just left me, and--"
William King, scratching a match under the table and fumbling with the
lamp chimney, laughed. "Is that all? I thought somebody had hung
himself."
"Oh, Dr. King," she cried, "I'm afraid, I'm afraid!"
He put out his friendly hand and led her to a chair. "Now, Mrs.
Richie," he said in his comforting voice, "sit down here, and get your
breath. There's nothing the matter with that scalawag, I assure you.
Has he been making himself a nuisance? I'll kick him!"
At these commonplace words, the tension broke in a rush of hysterical
tears, which, while it relieved her, maddened her because for a moment
she was unable to speak. But she managed to say, brokenly, that the boy
had said something which frightened her, for fear that he might--
"Kill himself?" said the doctor, cheerfully, "No indeed! The people who
threaten to kill themselves, never do. Come, now, forget all about
him." And William, smiling, drew one of her hands down from her eyes.
"Gracious! what a wrist! Did David scratch you?"
She pulled her hand away, and hid it in the folds of her skirt. "Oh, I
do hope you are right; but Dr. King, he said something--and I was so
frightened. Oh, if I could just know he had got home, all safe!"
"Well, it's easy to know that," said William. "Come, let us walk down
to Mr. Wright's; I bet a hat we'll find the young gentleman eating a
late supper with an excellent appetite. Love doesn't kill, Mrs.,
Richie--at Sam's age."
She was silent.
William took his lantern out of a closet, and made a somewhat elaborate
matter of lighting it, wiping off the oozing oil from the tank, and
then shutting the frame with a cheerful snap. It would give her time to
get hold of herself, he thought.
"I must apologize to Mrs. King," Helena said. "I was so frightened,
that I'm afraid I was abrupt."
"Oh, that's all right," said Martha's husband, easily, and opened the
outer door of the office. "Come."
She followed him down the garden path to the street: there in the
darkness, broken by the gay zigzag of the lantern across the flagstones
of the sidewalk, William found it easier to speak out:
"I hope you don't mind my referring to Sam's being in love, Mrs.
Richie? Of course, we have all known that he had lost his heart. Boys
will, you know. And, honestly, I think if ever a boy had excuse
for--that sort of thing, Sam had. But it has distressed me to have you
bothered. And to-night is the climax. For him to talk like a--a
jack-donkey, because you very properly snubbed him--you mustn't mind my
speaking plainly; I have understood the whole thing from the
beginning--makes me mad. You're really worn out. Confound that boy! You
are too good, Mrs. Richie, that's the trouble. You let yourself be
imposed upon."
Her broken "no--no" seemed to him a lovely humility, and he laughed and
shook his head.
"Yes, yes! When I see how gentle women are with us clods of men, I
really, I--you know--" William had never since his courting days got
into such a bog of sentiment, and he stammered his way out of it by
saying that Sam was a perfect nuisance.
When they reached the gateway of the senior warden's place, Mrs. Richie
said that she would wait. "I'll stand here in the road; and if you will
make some excuse, and find out--"
"Very well," he said. "I'll come back as quickly as I can, and tell you
he's all right. There isn't a particle of reason for anxiety, but it's
a better sedative for you than bromide. That's the why I'm doing it,"
said William candidly. He gave her the lantern, and said he did not
like to leave her. "You won't be frightened? You can see the house from
here, and can call if you want me. I'll have to stay about ten minutes,
or they wouldn't understand my coming in."
She nodded, impatient at his delay, and he slipped into the shadow of
the maples and disappeared. For a minute she could hear the crunch of
his footsteps on the gravel of the driveway. She sat down on the grass
by the roadside, and leaned her head against the big white gate-post.
The lantern burned steadily beside her, casting on the ground a shower
of yellow spots that blurred into a widening circle of light. Except
for the crickets all was still. The cooler air of night brought out the
heavy scents of damp earth and leaves, and over in the deep grass a
late May-apple spilled from its ivory cup the heavy odor of death. A
bob-white fluted in the darkness on the other side of the road.
Her acute apprehension had ceased. William King was so certain, that,
had the reality been less dreadful she would have been ashamed of the
fuss she had made. She wanted only this final assurance that the boy
was at home, safe and sound; then she would think of her own affairs.
She watched the moths fly about the lantern, and when one poor downy
pair of wings touched the hot, domed top and fell fluttering into the
road, she bent forward and looked at it, wondering what she could do
for it. To kill it would be the kindest thing,--to put it out of its
pain. But some obscure connection of ideas made her shudder back from
death, even a moth's death; she lifted the little creature gently, and
laid it in the dewy grass.
Down the Wrights' carriage road she heard a footstep on the gravel; a
step that grew louder and louder, the confident, comforting step of the
kind friend on whom she relied as she had never relied on any human
being.
"What did I tell you?" William called to her, as he loomed out of the
darkness into the circle of light from the lantern.
"He is all right?" she said trembling; "you saw him?"
"I didn't see him, but--"
"Oh," she said blankly.
"I saw those who had, ten minutes before; won't that do?" he teased
her. "I found the Wright family just going to bed--where you ought to
be this minute. I said I had just stopped in to say how-do-you-do.
Samuel at once reproved me, because I hadn't been to evening church."
"And he--Sam? Was he--"
"He was in the house, up-stairs, his mother said. I asked about him
sort of casually, and she said he had just come in and gone up to his
room. His father made some uncomplimentary remarks about him. Samuel
oughtn't to be so hard on him," William said thoughtfully; "he said he
had told Sam that he supposed he might look forward to supporting him
for the rest of his life--'as if he were a criminal or an idiot.'
Imagine a father saying a thing like that!" William lifted his lantern
and turned the wick up. "Now, I'm only hard on him when he is a goose;
but his father--_What was that?_"
William King stood bolt upright, motionless, his lips parted. Mrs.
Richie caught at his arm, and the lantern swinging sharply, scattered a
flying shower of light; they were both rigid, straining their ears, not
breathing. There was no sound except the vague movement of the leaves
overhead, and faintly, from across the meadow--"_Bob-white! bob-white!_"
"I thought--I heard--" the doctor said in a whisper. Helena, clutching
at his arm, reeled heavily against him.
"Yes. It was. That was what it was."
"No! Impossible!" he stammered. And they stood listening breathlessly;
then, just as the strain began to relax, down through the darkness from
the house behind the trees came a cry:
"Dr. King--"
An instant later the sound of flying steps on the gravel, and a girl's
shrill voice: "Dr. King!"
"Here, Lydia!" William said, running towards the little figure; "what's
the matter!"
Helena, in the shadow of the gate-post, only caught a word:
"Sam--"
And the doctor and the child were swallowed up in the night.
When William King came out of that house of confusion and death, he
found her huddled against the gate-post, haggard, drenched with dew,
waiting for him. He started, with a distressed word, and lifted her in
his arms. "Oh, you ought not to be here; I thought you had gone home
long ago!"
"_Dead?_"
"Yes."
"He--shot--
"Yes. Poor boy; poor, foolish, crazy boy! But it wasn't your fault. Oh,
my poor child!"
She shivered away from him, then without a word turned towards Old
Chester. The doctor walked at her side. It was nearly three, and very
dark. No one saw them as they went through the sleeping streets; at
William's house she stopped, with a silent gesture of dismissal.
"I am going to take you home," he said gently. And a few minutes later
he began to tell her about it. "He was dead when I got there. They
think it was an accident; and it is best they should. I am afraid I'll
have to explain to my wife, because she saw your apprehension. But
nobody else need know. Except--I must tell Dr. Lavendar, of course; but
not until after the funeral. There is no use complicating things. But
other people can just think it was an accident. It was, in one way. He
was insane. Everybody is, who does--that. Poor Samuel! Poor Mrs.
Wright! I could not leave them; but I thought you had gone home, or I
would have come. Mrs. Richie, promise me one thing: promise me not to
feel it was your fault."
She dropped her face in her hands. "Not my fault! ... I killed him."