_Letter-writing._
XCVIII. The writing letters with address and propriety, is a very
essential part of urbanity, and a matter upon which a great deal
may be said by way of instruction; but as the want of this may be
supplied, by reading approved books of letters on various subjects,
I would recommend to the reader the perusal of those of many eminent
men, which have been lately collected and published, by that diligent
and pains-taking person Don Gregorio Mayans y Siscar, librarian to
his majesty, and professor of civil law in the kingdom of Valentia;
and would advise him to read them over and over again with much
attention, as the best patterns of letters in our language. With
respect to the writing of Latin letters, those who desire to be well
instructed in that, should read attentively, those of Don Manuel Marti
Dean of Alicant, which have been lately published by the before-named
Don Gregorio Mayans in two volumes in octavo; and those of Mayans’s
own, which he published in one volume in quarto in 1732. I consider
the publication of these books, to have been of the greatest use and
importance, on account of the miserable state, to which the writing the
Latin language was reduced in Spain, and especially with respect to
the familiar or epistolary stile. How often have I experienced, that
whenever it became necessary for a religious society or community, to
write a Latin letter to Rome, or some other foreign kingdom, that there
were very few men to be found among them, who were capable of doing it,
unless it was in Latin stuffed full of Hispanisims? And whenever it
became necessary for them to converse in Latin with any stranger, they
seemed as much at a loss, and as much embarrassed, as if they had been
obliged to talk to him in Arabic.
XCIX. People are apt to run into the same error in writing multitudes
of letters, that they are in paying too many visits; as letters may
be termed a sort of visits in writing. Numbers of people are addicted
to this fault, and their reason for committing it is, that they are
in hopes by this means, to recommend themselves to the good graces of
those they write to; but nothing can be more absurd or ridiculous,
than thinking, that by being troublesome to people, you will gain
their esteem and affection; whereas the commission of this fault,
is most commonly attended with a quite opposite effect; and I have
seen many, who by the frequency of their letters, have lost the
good-will of those who had a regard for them, and whose friendship
they would have continued to possess, but for their teasing them with
a superfluous repetition of letters. There are not a few, who write
these sort of letters, for the sake afterwards of feeding their own
vanity by shewing the answers to them, in order to manifest that they
are esteemed by, and honoured with the correspondence of persons of
distinction. These are not only troublesome to those they write to,
but to those also to whom they shew the answers to their letters; and
what most commonly happens is, that instead of making themselves appear
respectable by doing this, they cause themselves to be despised, and
to look ridiculous; for there is scarce any one who does not regard
with contempt, a man that runs about from company to company reading
and shewing his letters, like a bad poet, who is always troubling his
friends with a repetition of his verses.
C. But what remedy is there for these impertinences? why no other, but
disregarding, and not giving answers to such letters. Oh! but this
would shew want of urbanity; no it would not, for I assert, that so far
from it, it would manifest much discretion; and I consider any man who
maintains a contrary opinion, to be under a great mistake. There is no
one who thinks it shews want of urbanity, to deny your being at home to
a man who persecutes you with troublesome visits. Why then should it
be thought that a man is wanting in this respect, who returns no answer
to these sort of letters? It is very likely, that the writer of them
will be much concerned and affected at not having answers to them; but
if I can cure an indisposition I labour under, by making the person
who brought it upon me, swallow the bitter draught that it may be
necessary should be taken to accomplish that end, instead of my taking
it myself, why should not I avail myself of such a remedy? In short,
in cases of this sort, it is impossible to adopt any other method than
that of giving no answer to these kind of letters; for attempting to
do otherwise, would be attempting more than a man who receives great
numbers of such letters could find leisure to execute; for I can safely
declare with respect to myself, that if I had not taken a resolution
not to answer all the letters I received, my whole time would not have
been sufficient to write those answers, nor my whole fortune, to pay
the postage of those that would have been addressed to me.
A
DEFENCE
OR
VINDICATION OF THE WOMEN.