observing the passage I have just quoted, continued his remarks upon the
discipline of the schools.--"In the new formed system of which we boast,"
said the master, "the philosophy which has enlightened the world
is omitted or passed over in a superficial way, and the student is
exercised in narrow and contracted rounds of education, in which his
whole labour is consumed, and his whole time employed, with little
improvement or useful knowledge. He has neither time nor inclination to
attend the public lectures in the several departments of philosophy; nor
is he qualified for that attendance. All that he does, or is required
to do, is to prepare himself to pass through these contracted rounds;
to write a theme, or point an epigram; but when he enters upon life,
action, or profession, both the little go, and the great go, he will
find to be a by go; for he will find that he has gone by the best part
of useful and substantial learning;
9 Know all men by these presents, that children in the uni-
versities eat pap and go in leading strings till they are
fourscore. --Terro Filius.
10 In a work quaintly entitled "Phantasm of an University,"
there occurs this sweeping paragraph, written in the true
spirit of radical reform: "Great advantages might be
obtained by gradually transforming Christ Church into a
college of civil polity and languages; Magdalen, Queen's,
University, into colleges of moral philosophy; New and
Trinity into colleges of fine arts; and the five halls into
colleges of agriculture and manufactures."
126~~ or that it has gone by him: to recover which he must repair from
this famous seat of learning to the institutions of the metropolis, or
in the provincial towns. I have just given you these hints, that you
may escape the errors of our system, and be enabled to avoid the pomp of
learning which is without the power, and acquire the power of knowledge
without the pomp." Here ended the lecture, and my venerable conductor
and myself made the best of our way to pay our respects to the principal
of my future residence.
Arrived here--the principal, a man of great dignity, received us with
all due form, and appeared exceedingly pleased with the visit of my
conductor; my introduction was much improved by a letter from the head
master of Eton, who, I have no doubt, said more in my favour than I
deserved. The appointment of a tutor was the next step, and for this
purpose I was introduced to Mr. Jay, a smart-looking little man, very
polite and very portly, with whom I retired to display my proficiency
in classical knowledge, by a repetition of nearly the same passages in
Homer and Virgil I had construed previously with the learned doctor; the
next arrangement was the sending for a tailor, who quickly produced my
academical robes and cap, in the which, I must confess, I at first
felt rather awkward. I was now hurried to the vice-chancellor's house
adjoining Pembroke college, where I had the honour of a presentation
to that dignitary; a mild-looking man of small stature, with the most
affable and graceful manners, dignified, and yet free from the
slightest tinge of _hauteur_. His reception of my tutor was friendly and
unembarrassing; his inquiries relative to myself directed solely to
my proficiency in the classics, of which I had again to give some
specimens; I was then directed to subscribe my name in a large folio
album, which proved to contain the thirty-nine articles, not one ~127~~
sentence of which I had ever read; but it was too late for hesitation,
and I remembered Tom Echo had informed me I should have to attest to a
great deal of nonsense, which no one ever took the pains to understand.
The remainder of this formal initiation was soon despatched: I
separately abjured the damnable doctrines of the pope, swore allegiance
to the king, and vowed to preserve the statutes and privileges of the
society I was then admitted into; paid my appointed fees, made my bow to
the vice-chancellor, and now concluded that the ceremony of the _togati_
was all over: in this, however, I was mistaken; my tutor requesting some
conference with me at his rooms, thither we proceeded, and arranged the
plan of my future studies; then followed a few general hints relative
to conduct, the most important of which was my obeisance to the
dignitaries, by capping{11} whenever I met them; the importance of a
strict attendance to the lectures of logic, mathematics, and divinity,
to the certain number of twenty in each term; a regular list of the
tradesmen whom I was requested to patronize; and, lastly, the entry of
my name upon the college books and payment of the necessary _caution
money_.{12} _Entering_ keeps one term; but as rooms were vacant, I was
fortunate in obtaining an immediate appointment. As the day was now
far advanced, I deemed it better to return to my inn and dress for the
dinner party at Christ Church.
11 Capping--by the students and under graduates is touching
the cap to the vice-chancollor, proctors, fellows, &c. when
passing. At Christ Church tradesmen and servants must walk
bareheaded through the quadrangle when the dean, canons,
censors, or tutors are present. At Pembroke this order is
rigidly enforced, even in wet weather. At Brazennose neither
servants nor tradesmen connected with the college are
allowed to enter it otherwise. It is not long since a
certain bookseller was discommoned for wearing his hat in B-
n-e quadrangle, and literally ruined in consequence.
12 Caution money--a sum of money deposited in the hands of
the treasurer or bursar by every member on his name being
entered upon the college books, as a security for the
payment of all bills and expenses contracted by him within
the walls of the college. This money is returned when the
party takes his degree or name off the books; and no man can
do either of these without receipts in full from the butler,
manciple, and cook of their respective colleges.
~128~~
[Illustration: page128]
[Illustration: page129]
~129~~ Architectural Reminiscences--Descriptive Remarks--Similitude
between the Characters of Cardinal Wolsey and Napoleon.
It was past five o'clock when I arrived before the majestic towers of
Christ Church.--The retiring sun brightening the horizon with streaks of
gold at parting, shed a rich glow over the scene that could not fail to
rivet my attention to the spot. Not all the fatigues of the day, nor
the peculiarities of my new situation, had, in the least, abated my
admiration of architectural beauties. The noble octagonal tower in the
enriched Gothic style, rising like a colossal ~130~~ monument of art
among the varied groups of spires, domes, and turrets, which from a
distance impress the traveller with favourable ideas of the magnificence
of Oxford, first attracted my notice, and recalled to my memory two
names that to me appear to be nearly associated (by comparison) with
each other, Wolsey and Napoleon; both gifted by nature with almost
all the brightest qualifications of great minds; both arriving at the
highest point of human grandeur from the most humble situations;
equally the patrons of learning, science, and the arts; and both equally
unfortunate, the victims of ambition: both persecuted exiles; yet,
further I may add, that both have left behind them a fame which
brightens with increasing years, and must continue to do as every
passing day removes the mist of prejudice from the eyes of man. Such
were the thoughts that rushed upon my mind as I stood gazing on the
splendid fabric before me, from the western side of St. Aidates,
unheedful of the merry laughter-loving group of students and
under-graduates, who, lounging under the vaulted gateway, were amusing
themselves at my expense in quizzing a freshman in the act of lionising.
The tower contains the celebrated _Magnus Thomas_, recast from the
great bell of Osney abbey, by whose deep note at the hour of nine in
the evening the students are summoned to their respective colleges. The
upper part of the tower displays in the bracketed canopies and carved
enrichments the skilful hand of Sir Christopher Wren, whose fame was
much enhanced by the erection of the gorgeous turrets which project on
each side of the gateway.{1} Not caring to endure a closer attack of
the _togati_, who had now approached me, I crossed and entered the
great quadrangle, or, according to Oxford phraseology, _Tom Quad_. The
irregular nature of the buildings here by no means assimilate with the
elegance of the exterior entrance.
1 It was here, in Lord Orford's opinion, that he "caught the
graces of the true Gothic taste."
[Illustration: page131]
~131~~ The eastern, northern, and part of the southern sides of the
quadrangle are, I have been since informed, inhabited by the dean and
canons; the western by students. The broad terrace in front of the
buildings, the extent of the arena, and the circular basin of water in
the centre, render this an agreeable promenade.--I had almost forgotten
the deity of the place (I hope not symbolical), a leaden Mercury{2}; the
gift of Dr. John Radcliffe, which rises from the centre of the basin,
on the spot where once stood the sacred cross of St. Frideswide, and the
pulpit of the reformer, Wickliffe.
2 Since pulled down and destroyed.
THE DINNER PARTY.
Bernard Blackmantles Visit to Tom Echo---Oxford Phraseology-
Smuggled Dinners--A College Party described--Topography of a
Man's Boom--Portrait of a Bachelor of Arts--Hints to
Freshmen--Customs of the University.
~132~~ "When first the freshman, bashful, blooming, young, Blessings
which here attend not handmaids long, Assumes that cap, which franchises
the man, And feels beneath the gown dilate his span; When he has stood
with modest glance, shy fear, And stiff-starch'd band before our prime
vizier, And sworn to articles he scarcely knew, And forsworn doctrines
to his creed all new: Through fancy's painted glass he fondly
sees Monastic turrets, patriarchal trees, The cloist'ral arches'
awe-inspiring shade, The High-street sonnetized by Wordsworth's jade,
His raptured view a paradise regards, Nurseling of hope! he builds on
paper cards."
On the western side of Tom Quad, up one flight of stairs, by the
porter's aid I discovered the battered oaken door which led to the
_larium_ of my friend Echo: that this venerable bulwark had sustained
many a brave attack from besiegers was visible in the numerous bruises
and imprints of hammers, crowbars, and other weapons, which had covered
its surface with many an indented scar. The utmost caution was apparent
in the wary scout,{1}
1 A Scout, at Christ Church, performs the same duties for
ten or twelve students as a butler and valet in a
gentleman's family. There are no women bedmakers at any
college except Christ Church, that duty being performed by
the scout.
~133~~ who admitted me; a necessary precaution, as I afterwards found,
to prevent the prying eye of some inquisitive domine, whose nose has a
sort of instinctive attraction in the discovery of smuggled dinners.{2}
Within I found assembled half a dozen good-humoured faces, all young,
and all evidently partaking of the high flow of spirits and animated
vivacity of the generous hearted Tom Echo. A college introduction is one
of little ceremony, the surname alone being used,--a practice, which,
to escape quizzing, must also be followed on your card. "Here, old
fellows," said Tom, taking me by the hand, and leading me forwards to
his companions, "allow me to introduce an ex{3}-college man,--Blackmantle
of Brazennose, a freshman{4} and an Etonian: so, lay to him, boys;
he's just broke loose from the Land of Sheepishness,{5} passed Pupils
Straits{6} and the Isle of Matriculation{7} to follow Dads Will,{8} in
the Port of Stuffs{9}; from which, if he can steer clear of the Fields
of Temptation{10}
2 Smuggled dinners are private parties in a student's room,
when the dinner is brought into college from a tavern:
various are the ingenious stratagems of the togati to elude
the vigilance of the authorities: trunks, packing-boxes,
violoncello-cases, and hampers are not unfrequently directed
as if from a waggon or coach-office, and brought into
college on the shoulders of some porter. Tin cans of soup
are drawn up by means of a string from the back windows in
the adjoining street. It is not long since Mr. C- of Christ
Church was expelled for having a dinner smuggled into
college precisely in the manner adopted by Tom Echo.
3 A University man who is visiting in a college of which he
is
not a member.
4 The usual phrase for initiating a freshman on his first
appearance in a party or frisk.
5 Land of Sheepishness--School-boy's bondage.
6 Pupil's Straits--Interval between restraint and liberty.
7 Isle of Matriculation--First entrance into the University.
8 Dad's Will--Parental authority.
9 Port for Stay's--Assumption of commoner's gown.
10 Fields of Temptation--The attractions held out to him.
~134~~ he hopes to make the _Land of Promise_,{11} anchor his bark in
the _Isthmus of Grace_,{12} and lay up snugly for life on the _Land
of Incumbents_."{13} "For heaven's sake, Tom," said I," speak in some
intelligible language; it's hardly fair to fire off your battery of
Oxonian wit upon a poor freshman at first sight." At this moment a rap
at the _oak_ announced an addition to our party, and in bounded that
light-hearted child of whim, Horace Eglantine:--"What, Blackmantle here?
Why then, Tom, we can form as complete a trio as ever got _bosky_{14}
with _bishop_{15} in _the province of Bacchus_,{16}! Why, what a plague,
my old fellow, has given you that rueful-looking countenance? I am sure
you was not plucked upon _Maro Common_ or _Homer Downs_{17} in passing
examination with the big wig this morning; or has Tom been
frisking{18} you already with some of his jokes about the _straits of
independency_{19}; the _waste of ready_{20}; the dynasty of Venus,{21}
or the quicksands of rustication{22}.
11 Land of Promise--The fair expectations of a steady novice
in Oxford.
12 Isthmus of Grace--Obtainment of the grace of one's
college.
13 Land of Incumbents--Good livings.
14 Bosky is the term used in Oxford to express the style of
being "half seas over."
15 Bishop--A good orthodox mead composed of port wine and
roasted oranges or lemons.
16 Province of Bacchus--Inebriety.
17 Maro Common and Homer Downs allude to the AEneid of
Virgil and the Iliad of Homer--two books chiefly studied for
the little-go or responsions.
18 Frisking--Hoaxing.
19 Straits of Independency--Frontiers of extravagance.
20 Waste of Ready, including in it Hoyle's Dominions--
Course of gambling, including Loo tables.
21 Dynasty of Venus--Indiscriminate love and misguided
affections.
22 Quicksands of Rustication--On which our hero may at any
time run foul when inclined to visit a new county.
~135~~ Cheer up, old fellow! you are not half way through the ceremony
of initiation yet. We must brighten up that solemn phiz of yours, and
give you a lesson or two on college principles? If I had been thrown
upon some newly-discovered country, among a race of wild Indians, I
could not have been more perplexed and confounded than I now felt
in endeavouring to rally, and appear to comprehend this peculiar
phraseology.
A conversation now ensuing between a gentleman commoner, whom the party
designated Pontius Pilate{23} and Tom Echo, relative to the comparative
merits of their hunters, afforded me an opportunity of surveying
the _larium_ of my friend; the entrance to which was through a short
passage, that served the varied purposes of an ante-room or
vestibule, and a scout's pantry and boot-closet. On the right was the
sleeping-room, and at the foot of a neat French bed I could perceive the
wine bin, surrounded by a regiment of _dead men_{24} who had, no doubt,
departed this life like heroes in some battle of Bacchanalian sculls.
The principal chamber, the very _penetrale_ of the Muses, was about six
yards square, and low, with a rich carved oaken wainscoting, reaching to
the ceiling; the monastic gloom being materially increased by two narrow
loopholes, intended for windows, but scarcely yielding sufficient light
to enable the student to read his _Scapula or Lexicon_{25} with
the advantage of a meridian sun: the fire-place was immensely wide,
emblematical, no doubt, of the capacious stomachs of the good fathers
and fellows, the ancient inhabitants of this _sanctum_; but the
most singularly-striking characteristic was the modern decorations,
introduced by the present occupant.
23 A quaint cognomen applied to him from the rapidity with
which he boasted of repeating the Nicene Creed,--i.e.
offering a bet that no would give any man as far as "Pontius
Pilate," and beat him before he got to the "resurrection of
the dead."
24 Dead Men--Empty bottles.
25 Scapula, Hederic, and Lexicon, the principal
Dictionaries in use for studying Greek.
~136~~ Over the fire-place hung a caricature portrait of a well-known
Bachelor of Arts, drinking at the _Pierian spring, versus_ gulping down
the contents of a Pembroke _overman_,{26} sketched by the facetious
pencil of the humorist, Rowlandson.
[Illustration: page136]
ECCE SIGNUM.
I could not help laughing to observe on the one side of this jolly
personage a portrait of the little female Giovanni Vestris, under which
some wag had inscribed, "_A Mistress of Hearts_," and on the other
a full-length of Jackson the pugilist, with this motto--"A striking
likeness of a fancy lecturer."
26 An Herman--At Pembroke, a large silver tankard, holding
two quarts and half a pint, so called from the donor, Mr.
George Overman. The late John Hudson, the college tonsor
and _common room man_,{*} was famous for having several
times, for trifling wagers, drank a full overman of strong
beer off at a draught. A Tun, another vessel in use at
Pembroke, is a half pint silver cup. A Whistler, a silver
pint tankard also in use there, was the gift of Mr. Anthony
Whistler, a cotemporary with Shenstone.
* Common room man, a servant who is entirely employed in
attending upon the members of the common room.
Junior common room, a room in every college, except Christ
Church, set apart for the junior members to drink wine in
and read the newspapers.
N.B. There is but one common room at Christ Church; none but
masters of arts and noblemen can be members of it,--the
latter but seldom attend. The last who attended was the late
Duke of Dorset. All common rooms are regularly furnished
with newspapers and magazines.
_Curator of the common rooms_.-A senior master of arts, who
buys the wine and inspects the accounts.
~137~~ In the centre of the opposite side hung the portrait of an old
_scout_, formerly of Brazennose, whose head now forms the admission
ticket to the college club. Right and left were disposed the plaster
busts of Aristotle and Cicero; the former noseless, and the latter with
his eyes painted black, and a huge pair of mustachios annexed. A few
volumes of the Latin and Greek classics were thrown into a heap in one
corner of the room, while numerous modern sporting publications usurped
their places on the book shelves, richly gilt and bound in calf, but not
lettered. The hunting cap, whip, and red coat were hung up like a trophy
between two foxes' tails, which served the purpose of bell pulls. At
this moment, my topographical observations were disturbed by the arrival
of the scout with candles, and two strange-looking fellows in smock
frocks, bringing in, as I supposed, a piano forte, but which, upon being
placed on the table, proved to be a mere case: the top being taken off,
the sides and ends let down in opposite directions, and the cloth pulled
out straight, displayed an elegant dinner, smoking hot, and arranged
in as much form as if the college butler had superintended the feast.
"Come, old fellow," said Tom, "turn to--no ceremony. I hope,
Jem," addressing his scout, "you took care that no ~138~~ college
telegraph{27} was at work while you were smuggling the dinner in."
"I made certain sure of that, sir," said Jem; "for I placed Captain
Cook{28} sentinel at one corner of the quadrangle, and old Brady at the
other, with directions to whistle, as a signal, if they saw any of the
_dons_ upon the look out."
Finding we were not likely to be interrupted by the _domine_, Tom took
the chair. The fellows in the smock frocks threw off their disguises,
and proved to be two genteelly dressed waiters from one of the inns.
"Close the oak, Jem," said Horace Eglantine, "and take care no one
knocks in{29} before we have knocked down the contents of your master's
musical melange." "_Punning_ as usual, Eglantine," said the Honourable
Mr. Sparkle, a gentleman commoner. "Yes; and _pun_-ishing too, old
fellow!" said Horace. "Where's the _cold tankard_,{30} Echo?
27 A college telegraph--A servant of a college, who carries
an account of every trifling offence committed, either by
gentlemen or servants, to the college officers.
28 Well-known characters in Christ Church.
29 Knocking in--Going into college after half-past ten at
night. The names of the gentlemen who knock in are entered
by the porter in a book kept for that purpose, and the next
morning it is carried to the dean and censors, who generally
call upon the parties so offending to account for being out
of college at so late an hour. A frequent recurrence of this
practice will sometimes draw from the dean a very severe
reprimand.
Knocking in money--Fines levied for knocking into college at
improper hours: the first fine is fixed at half-past ten,
and increased every half hour afterwards. These fines are
entered on the batter book, and charged among the battels
and decrements,* a portion of which is paid to the porter
quarterly, for being knocked up.
30 Cold tankard--A summer beverage, used at dinner, made of
brandy, cider, or perry, lemons cut in slices, cold water,
sugar, nutmeg, cinnamon, and the herbs balm and burridge.
Sometimes sherry or port wine is substituted for cider. The
tankard is put into a pitcher, which is iced in a tub,
procured from the confectioners.
* Decrements.--The use of knives, folks, spoons, and other
necessaries, with the firing, &c. for the hall and chapel.
~139~~ We must give our old _con_, Blackmantle, a warm reception."
"Sure, that's a Paddyism"{31} said a young Irish student. "Nothing of
the sort," replied Horace: "are we not all here the sons of Isis (Ices)?
and tell me where will you find a group of warmer hearted souls?"
"Bravo! bravo!" shouted the party. "That fellow Eglantine will create
another _Pun_-ic war," said Sparkle. "I move that we have him crossed in
the buttery{32} for making us laugh during dinner, to the great injury
of our digestive organs, and the danger of suffocation." "What! deprive
an Englishman of his right to battel{33}" said Echo: "No; I would
sooner inflict the orthodox fine of a double bumper of _bishop_."
"Bravo!" said Horace: "then I plead guilty, and swallow the imposition."
"I'll thank you for a cut out of the back of that _lion_,"{34} tittered
a man opposite. With all the natural timidity of the hare whom he thus
particularised, I was proceeding to help him, when Echo inquired if he
should send me the breast of a swiss {35} and the facetious Eglantine,
to increase my confusion, requested to be allowed to cut me a slice off
the wing of a wool bird.{36}
31 A Paddyism is called in this university a "Thorpism" from
Mr. Thorp, formerly a hosier of some note in the city. He
was famous for making blunders and coining new words, was
very fond of making long speeches, and when upon _the toe_,
never failed to convulse his hearers with laughter.
32 Crossed in the buttery--not allowed to battel, a
punishment for missing lecture. By being frequently crossed,
a man will lose his term.
33 Battels--Bread, butter, cheese, salt, eggs, &c.
34 A lion--a hare.
35 Siciss--a pheasant.
36 Wing of a wool bird--Shoulder of lamb.