LADY MARY ON EDUCATION AND WOMAN'S RIGHTS
The choice of books for children's reading--The dangers of a narrow
education--Lady Mary advocates the higher education of women--Girls
should be taught languages--Lady Mary's theories of education for
girls--Women writers in Italy--A "rumpus" made by ladies in the House of
Lords--Woman's Rights--Lady Mary's views on religion.
In spite of her own fondness for books, Lady Mary was not a wholehearted
believer in reading for young folk, unless the choice of volumes was
carefully made by some competent person. This point she emphasised in
one of her letters to her daughter.
"I can't forbear saying something in relation to my granddaughters, who
are very near my heart. If any of them are fond of reading, I would not
advise you to hinder them (chiefly because it is impossible) seeing
poetry, plays, or romances; but accustom them to talk over what they
read, and point out to them, as you are very capable of doing, the
absurdity often concealed under fine expressions, where the sound is apt
to engage the admiration of young people. I was so much charmed, at
fourteen, with the dialogue of Henry and Emma, I can say it by heart to
this day, without reflecting on the monstrous folly of the story in
plain prose, where a young heiress to a fond father is represented
falling in love with a fellow she had only seen as a huntsman, a
falconer, and a beggar, and who confesses, without any circumstances of
excuse, that he is obliged to run his country, having newly committed a
murder. She ought reasonably to have supposed him, at best, a
highwayman; yet the virtuous virgin resolves to run away with him, to
live among the banditti, and wait upon his trollop, if she had no other
way of enjoying his company. This senseless tale is, however, so well
varnished with melody of words and pomp of sentiments, I am convinced it
has hurt more girls than ever were injured by the lewdest poems extant."
Life, Lady Mary was at pains to insist upon, is a much better instructor
for the young than any story-book, however innocuous it may seem to
grown-up people, who for the greater number have not the faculty of
seeing how the tale would have affected them in their childhood.
"I congratulate my granddaughters on being born in an age so much
enlightened. Sentiments are certainly extreme silly, and only qualify
young people to be the bubbles of all their acquaintance. I do not doubt
the frequency of assemblies has introduced a more enlarged way of
thinking; it is a kind of public education, which I have always thought
as necessary for girls as for boys. A woman married at five-and-twenty,
from under the eye of a strict parent, is commonly as ignorant as she
was at five; and no more capable of avoiding the snares, and struggling
with the difficulties, she will infallibly meet with in the commerce of
the world. The knowledge of mankind (the most useful of all knowledge)
can only be acquired by conversing with them. Books are so far from
giving that instruction, they fill the head with a set of wrong notions,
from whence spring the tribes of Clarissas, Harriets, &c. Yet such was
the method of education when I was in England, which I had it not in my
power to correct; the young will always adopt the opinions of all their
companions, rather than the advice of their mothers."
"Ignorance and a narrow education lay the foundations of vice," Mary
Astell had laid down as an axiom, and Lady Mary was always propounding
this to her daughter.
"I am extremely concerned to hear you complain of ill health, at a time
of life when you ought to be in the flower of your strength. I hope I
need not recommend to you the care of it: the tenderness you have for
your children is sufficient to enforce you to the utmost regard for the
preservation of a life so necessary to their well-being. I do not doubt
your prudence in their education: neither can I say anything particular
relating to it at this distance, different tempers requiring different
management. In general, never attempt to govern them (as most people do)
by deceit: if they find themselves cheated, even in trifles, it will so
far lessen the authority of their instructor, as to make them neglect
all their future admonitions. And, if possible, breed them free from
prejudices; those contracted in the nursery often influence the whole
life after, of which I have seen many melancholy examples. I shall say
no more of this subject, nor would have said this little if you had not
asked my advice: 'tis much easier to give rules than to practise them. I
am sensible my own natural temper is too indulgent: I think it the least
dangerous error, yet still it is an error. I can only say with truth,
that I do not know in my whole life having ever endeavoured to impose on
you, or give a false colour to anything that I represented to you. If
your daughters are inclined to love reading, do not check their
inclination by hindering them of the diverting part of it; it is as
necessary for the amusement of women as the reputation of men; but teach
them not to expect or desire any applause from it. Let their brothers
shine, and let them content themselves with making their lives easier by
it, which I experimentally know is more effectually done by study than
any other way. Ignorance is as much the fountain of vice as idleness,
and indeed generally produces it. People that do not read, or work for a
livelihood, have many hours they know not how to employ; especially
women, who commonly fall into vapours, or something worse."
Mary was an advocate, one of the earliest advocates, for the higher
education of woman. Although she had educated herself, she realised that
the circumstances in her case were exceptional, and no doubt it was also
borne in on her that she had been an exceptional girl even as she was a
remarkable woman. It was not so much lack of education against which she
tilted, as ill-directed studies.
"You have given me a great deal of satisfaction by your account of your
eldest daughter. I am particularly pleased to hear she is a good
arithmetician; it is the best proof of understanding: the knowledge of
numbers is one of the chief distinctions between us and the brutes. If
there is anything in blood, you may reasonably expect your children
should be endowed with an uncommon share of good sense. Mr. Wortley's
family and mine have both produced some of the greatest men that have
been born in England: I mean Admiral Sandwich, and my grandfather, who
was distinguished by the name of Wise William. I have heard Lord Bute's
father mentioned as an extraordinary genius, though he had not many
opportunities of showing it; and his uncle, the present Duke of Argyll,
has one of the best heads I ever knew. I will therefore speak to you as
supposing Lady Mary not only capable, but desirous of learning; in that
case by all means let her be indulged in it. You will tell me I did not
make it a part of your education: your prospect was very different from
hers. As you had no defect either in mind or person to hinder, and much
in your circumstances to attract, the highest offers, it seemed your
business to learn how to live in the world, as it is hers to know how to
be easy out of it. It is the common error of builders and parents to
follow some plan they think beautiful (and perhaps is so), without
considering that nothing is beautiful that is displaced. Hence we see so
many edifices raised that the raisers can never inhabit, being too large
for their fortunes. Vistas are laid open over barren heaths, and
apartments contrived for a coolness very agreeable in Italy, but killing
in the north of Britain: thus every woman endeavours to breed her
daughter a fine lady, qualifying her for a station in which she will
never appear, and at the same time incapacitating her for that
retirement to which she is destined. Learning, if she has a real taste
for it, will not only make her contented, but happy in it. No
entertainment is so cheap as reading, nor any pleasure so lasting. She
will not want new fashions, nor regret the loss of expensive diversions,
or variety of company, if she can be amused with an author in her
closet. To render this amusement extensive, she should be permitted to
learn the languages. I have heard it lamented that boys lose so many
years in mere learning of words: this is no objection to a girl, whose
time is not so precious: she cannot advance herself in any profession,
and has therefore more hours to spare; and as you say her memory is
good, she will be very agreeably employed this way. There are two
cautions to be given on this subject: first, not to think herself
learned when she could read Latin, or even Greek. Languages are more
properly to be called vehicles of learning than learning itself, as may
be observed in many schoolmasters, who, though perhaps critics in
grammar, are the most ignorant fellows upon earth. True knowledge
consists in knowing things, not words. I would wish her no further a
linguist than to enable her to read books in their originals, that are
often corrupted, and always injured, by translations. Two hours'
application every morning will bring this about much sooner than you can
imagine, and she will have leisure enough besides to run over the
English poetry, which is a more important part of a woman's education
than it is generally supposed. Many a young damsel has been ruined by a
fine copy of verses, which she would have laughed at if she had known it
had been stolen from Mr. Waller. I remember, when I was a girl, I saved
one of my companions from destruction, who communicated to me an epistle
she was quite charmed with. As she had a natural good taste, she
observed the lines were not so smooth as Prior's or Pope's, but had more
thought and spirit than any of theirs. She was wonderfully delighted
with such a demonstration of her lover's sense and passion,
a little pleased with her own charms, that had force enough to inspire
such elegancies. In the midst of this triumph I showed her that they
were taken from Randolph's poems, and the unfortunate transcriber was
dismissed with the scorn he deserved. To say truth, the poor plagiary
was very unlucky to fall into my hands; that author being no longer in
fashion, would have escaped any one of less universal reading than
myself. You should encourage your daughter to talk over with you what
she reads; and, as you are very capable of distinguishing, take care she
does not mistake pert folly for wit and humour, or rhyme for poetry,
which are the common errors of young people, and have a train of ill
consequences. The second caution to be given her (and which is most
absolutely necessary) is to conceal whatever learning she attains, with
as much solicitude as she would hide crookedness or lameness; the parade
of it can only serve to draw on her the envy, and consequently the most
inveterate hatred, of all he and she fools, which will certainly be at
least three parts in four of all her acquaintance. The use of knowledge
in our sex, besides the amusement of solitude, is to moderate the
passions, and learn to be contented with a small expense, which are the
certain effects of a studious life; and it may be preferable even to
that fame which men have engrossed to themselves, and will not suffer us
to share. You will tell me I have not observed this rule myself; but you
are mistaken: it is only inevitable accident that has given me any
reputation that way. I have always carefully avoided it, and ever
thought it a misfortune. The explanation of this paragraph would
occasion a long digression, which I will not trouble you with, it being
my present design only to say what I think useful for the instruction of
my granddaughter, which I have much at heart. If she has the same
inclination (I should say passion) for learning that I was born with,
history, geography, and philosophy will furnish her with materials to
pass away cheerfully a longer life than is allotted to mortals. I
believe there are few heads capable of making Sir I. Newton's
calculations, but the result of them is not difficult to be understood by
a moderate capacity. Do not fear this should make her affect the character
of Lady----, or Lady----, or Mrs.----: those women are ridiculous,
not because they have learning but because they have it not. One thinks
herself a complete historian, after reading Echard's Roman History;
another a profound philosopher, having got by heart some of Pope's
unintelligible essays; and a third an able divine, on the strength of
Whitefield's sermons: thus you hear them screaming politics and
controversy.
"It is a saying of Thucydides, ignorance is bold, and knowledge
reserved. Indeed, it is impossible to be far advanced in it without
being more humbled by a conviction of human ignorance, than elated by
learning. At the same time I recommend books, I neither exclude work nor
drawing. I think it as scandalous for a woman not to know how to use a
needle, as for a man not to know how to use a sword. I was once
extremely fond of my pencil, and it was a great mortification to me when
my father turned off my master, having made a considerable progress for
a short time I learnt. My over-eagerness in the pursuit of it had
brought a weakness on my eyes, that made it necessary to leave it off;
and all the advantage I got was the improvement of my hand. I see, by
hers, that practice will make her a ready writer: she may attain it by
serving you for a secretary, when your health or affairs make it
troublesome to you to write yourself; and custom will make it an
agreeable amusement to her. She cannot have too many for that station of
life which will probably be her fate. The ultimate end of your education
was to make you a good wife (and I have the comfort to hear that you are
one): hers ought to be, to make her happy in a virgin state. I will not
say it is happier; but it is undoubtedly safer than any marriage. In a
lottery, which there are (at the lowest computation) ten thousand blanks
to a prize, it is the most prudent choice not to venture. I have always
been so thoroughly persuaded of this truth, that, notwithstanding the
flattering views I had for you (as I never intended you a sacrifice to
my vanity), I thought I owed you the justice to lay before you all the
hazards attending matrimony: you may recollect I did so in the strongest
manner. Perhaps you may have more success in the instructing your
daughter: she has so much company at home, she will not need seeking it
abroad, and will more readily take the notions you think fit to give her.
As you were alone in my family, it would have been thought a great
cruelty to suffer you no companions of your own age, especially having
so many near relations, and I do not wonder their opinions influenced
yours. I was not sorry to see you not determined on a single life,
knowing it was not your father's intention, and contented myself with
endeavouring to make your home so easy that you might not be in haste to
leave it."
Lady Mary's views on the education of children were well in advance of
her day. They were certainly not the stereotyped opinions current among
governesses or even parents somewhat more enlightened than the rest, and
evidently she had given much consideration to the subject before she put
her thoughts on paper.
"People commonly educate their children as they build their houses,
according to some plan they think beautiful, without considering whether
it is suited to the purposes for which they are designed. Almost all
girls of quality are educated as if they were to be great ladies, which
is often as little to be expected, as an immoderate heat of the sun in
the north of Scotland. You should teach yours to confine their desires
to probabilities, to be as useful as is possible to themselves, and to
think privacy (as it is) the happiest state of life. I do not doubt you
giving them all the instructions necessary to form them to a virtuous
life; but 'tis a fatal mistake to do this without proper restrictions.
Vices are often hid under the name of virtues, and the practice of them
followed by the worst of consequences. Sincerity, friendship, piety,
disinterestedness, and generosity, are all great virtues; but,
without discretion, become criminal. I have seen ladies indulge their
own ill humour by being very rude and impertinent, and think they
deserved approbation by saying I love to speak truth. One of your
acquaintance made a ball the next day after her mother died, to show she
was sincere. I believe your own reflection will furnish you with but too
many examples of the ill effects of the rest of the sentiments I have
mentioned, when too warmly embraced. They are generally recommended to
young people without limits or distinction, and this prejudice hurries
them into great misfortunes, while they are applauding themselves in the
noble practice (as they fancy) of very eminent virtues.
"I cannot help adding (out of my real affection to you), I wish you
would moderate that fondness you have for your children. I do not mean
you should abate any part of your care, or not do your duty to them in
its utmost extent: but I would have you early prepare yourself for
disappointments, which are heavy in proportion to their being
surprising. It is hardly possible, in such a number, that none should be
unhappy; prepare yourself against a misfortune of that kind. I confess
there is hardly any more difficult to support; yet it is certain
imagination has a great share in the pain of it, and it is more in our
power than it is commonly believed to soften whatever ills are founded
or augmented by fancy. Strictly speaking, there is but one real evil--I
mean, acute pain; all other complaints are so considerably diminished by
time, that it is plain the grief is owing to our passion, since the
sensation of it vanishes when that is over.
"There is another mistake, I forgot to mention, usual in mothers: if any
of their daughters are beauties, they take great pains to persuade them
that they are ugly, or at least that they think so, which the young
woman never fails to believe springs from envy, and is perhaps not much
in the wrong. I would, if possible, give them a just notion of their
figure, and show them how far it is valuable. Every advantage has its
price, and may be either over or undervalued. It is the common
doctrine of (what are called) good books, to inspire a contempt of
beauty, riches, greatness, &c., which has done as much mischief among
the young of our sex as an over eager desire of them. They should look
on these things as blessings where they are bestowed, though not
necessaries that it is impossible to be happy without."
Of course, all these expressions of opinions, although here gathered
together, were spread over a term of years. Yet, Lady Mary had from time
to time some qualms as to how her admonitions would be received by her
daughter, although, as she was careful once to point out: "I do not give
them as believing my age has furnished me with superior wisdom, but in
compliance with your desire."
"I cannot help writing a sort of apology for my laster letter,
foreseeing that you will think it wrong, or at least Lord Bute will be
extremely shocked at the proposal of a learned education for daughters,
which the generality of men believe as great a profanation as the clergy
would do if the laity should presume to exercise the functions of the
priesthood. I desire you would take notice, I would not have learning
enjoined them as a task, but permitted as a pleasure, if their genius
leads them naturally to it. I look upon my granddaughters as a sort of
lay nuns: destiny may have laid up other things for them, but they have
no reason to expect to pass their time otherwise than their aunts do at
present; and I know, by experience, it is in the power of study not only
to make solitude tolerable, but agreeable. I have now lived almost seven
years in a stricter retirement than yours in the Isle of Bute, and can
assure you, I have never had half an hour heavy on my hands, for want of
something to do. Whoever will cultivate their own mind, will find full
employment. Every virtue does not only require great care in the
planting, but as much daily solicitude in cherishing, as exotic fruits
and flowers. The vices and passions (which I am afraid are the natural
product of the soil) demand perpetual weeding. Add to this the search
after knowledge (every branch of which is entertaining), and the longest
life is too short for the pursuit of it; which, though in some regards
confined to very strait limits, leaves still a vast variety of
amusements to those capable of tasting them, which is utterly impossible
for those that are blinded by prejudices which are the certain effect of
an ignorant education. My own was one of the worst in the world, being
exactly the same as Clarissa Hawlowe's; her pious Mrs. Norton so
perfectly resembling my governess, who had been nurse to my mother, I
could almost fancy the author was acquainted with her. She took so much
pains, from my infancy, to fill my head with superstitious tales and
false notions, it was none of her fault I am not at this day afraid of
witches and hobgoblins, or turned methodist. Almost all girls are bred
after this manner. I believe you are the only woman (perhaps I might
say, person) that never was either frighted or cheated into anything by
your parents. I can truly affirm, I never deceived anybody in my life,
excepting (which I confess has often happened undesignedly) by speaking
plainly; as Earl Stanhope used to say (during his ministry) he always
imposed on the foreign ministers by telling them the naked truth, which,
as they thought impossible to come from the mouth of a statesman, they
never failed to write informations to their respective courts directly
contrary to the assurances he gave them: most people confounding the
ideas of sense and cunning, though there are really no two things in
nature more opposite: it is, in part, from this false reasoning, the
unjust custom prevails of debarring our sex from the advantages of
learning, the men fancying the improvement of our understandings would
only furnish us with more art to deceive them, which is directly
contrary to the truth. Fools are always enterprising, not seeing the
difficulties of deceit, or the ill consequences of detection. I could
give many examples of ladies whose ill conduct has been very notorious,
which has been owing to that ignorance which has exposed them to
idleness, which is justly called the mother of mischief. There is
nothing so like the education of a woman of quality as that of a prince:
they are taught to dance, and the exterior part of what is called good
breeding, which, if they attain, they are extraordinary creatures in
their kind, and have all the accomplishments required by their
directors. The same characters are formed by the same lessons, which
inclines me to think (if I dare say it) that nature has not placed us in
an inferior rank to men, no more than the females of other animals,
where we see no distinction of capacity; though, I am persuaded, if
there was a commonwealth of rational horses (as Doctor Swift has
supposed), it would be an established maxim among them, that a mare
could not be taught to pace. I could add a great deal on this subject,
but I am not now endeavouring to remove the prejudices of mankind; my
only design is, to point out to my granddaughters the method of being
contented with that retreat, to which probably their circumstances will
oblige them, and which is perhaps preferable to all the show of public
life. It has always been my inclination. Lady Stafford (who knew me
better than anybody else in the world, both from her own just
discernment, and my heart being ever as open to her as myself) used to
tell me, my true vocation was a monastery; and I now find, by
experience, more sincere pleasure with my books and garden, than all the
flutter of a court could give me.
"If you follow my advice in relation to Lady Mary, my correspondence may
be of use to her; and I shall very willingly give her those instructions
that may be necessary in the pursuit of her studies. Before her age I
was in the most regular commerce with my grandmother, though the
difference of our time of life was much greater, she being past
forty-five when she married my grandfather. She died at ninety-six,
retaining, to the last, the vivacity and clearness of her understanding,
which was very uncommon. You cannot remember her, being then in your
nurse's arms. I conclude with repeating to you, I only recommend, but am
far from commanding, which I think I have no right to do. I tell you my
sentiments, because you desired to know them, and hope you will receive
them with some partiality, as coming from
"Your most affectionate mother."
One of Lady Mary's friends was Cardinal Gerolamo Guerini, a distinguished
scholar as well as a great churchman. One day, in October, 1753, he sent
a request, by one of his chief chaplains, that Lady Mary would send him
her printed works for the shelves that he was dedicating to English
literature in the library attached to the college at Brescia that he had
founded.
"I was struck dumb for some time with this astonishing request; when I
recovered my vexatious surprise (foreseeing the consequence), I made
answer, I was highly sensible of the honour designed me, but, upon my
word, I had never printed a single line in my life. I was answered in a
cold tone, his Eminence could send for them to England, but they would
be a long time coming, and with some hazard; and that he had flattered
himself I would not refuse him such a favour, and I need not be ashamed
of seeing my name in a collection where he admitted none but the most
eminent authors. It was to no purpose to endeavour to convince him. He
would not stay to dinner, though earnestly invited; and went away with
the air of one that thought he had reason to be offended. I know his
master will have the same sentiments, and I shall pass in his opinion
for a monster of ingratitude, while it is the blackest of vices in my
opinion, and of which I am utterly incapable--I really could cry for
vexation.
"Sure nobody ever had such various provocations to print as myself. I
have seen things I have wrote, so mangled and falsified, I have scarce
known them. I have seen poems I never read, published with my name at
length; and others, that were truly and singly wrote by me, printed
under the names of others. I have made myself easy under all these
mortifications, by the reflection I did not deserve them, having never
aimed at the vanity of popular applause; but I own my philosophy is not
proof against losing a friend, and it may be making an enemy of one to
whom I am obliged."
In this letter to Lady Mar, in which Lady Mary explains her plight, she
goes on to deliver herself of her sentiments concerning the difference
of opinion as regards women writers that was current in Italy and in
England.
Lady Mary held strong views on what are called to-day, or at least were
so called until they were lately in the main conceded, women's rights.
Although she said that she did not complain that it was men, and men
only, who were privileged to exercise the power of government, it is not
unlikely that she yielded this point in order the more effectively to
emphasise some other. Anyhow she was unfeignedly pleased to be able to
record (to Lady Pomfret, March, 1737) a "rumpus" made by ladies who
regarded their exclusion from a debate in Parliament as unwarrantable.
"I confess I have often been complimented, since I have been in Italy,
on the books I have given the public. I used at first to deny it with
some warmth; but, finding I persuaded nobody, I have of late contented
myself with laughing whenever I heard it mentioned, knowing the
character of a learned woman is far from being ridiculous in this
country, the greatest families being proud of having produced female
writers; and a Milanese lady being now professor of mathematics in the
university of Bologna, invited thither by a most obliging letter, wrote
by the present Pope, who desired her to accept of the chair, not as a
recompense for her merit, but to do honour to a town which is under his
protection. To say truth, there is no part of the world where our sex is
treated with so much contempt as in England. I do not complain of men
for having engrossed the government: in excluding us from all degrees of
power, they preserve us from many fatigues, many dangers, and perhaps
many crimes. The small proportion of authority that has fallen to my
share (only over a few children and servants) has always been a burden,
and never a pleasure, and I believe every one finds it so who acts from
a maxim (I think an indispensable duty), that whoever is under my power
is under my protection. Those who find a joy in inflicting hardships,
and seeing objects of misery, may have other sensations; but I have
always thought corrections, even when necessary, as painful to the giver
as to the sufferer, and am therefore very well satisfied with the state
of subjection we are placed in: but I think it the highest injustice to
be debarred the entertainment of my closet, and that the same studies
which raise the character of a man should hurt that of a woman. We are
educated in the grossest ignorance, and no art omitted to stifle our
natural reason; if some few get above their nurses' instructions, our
knowledge must rest concealed, and be as useless to the world as gold in
the mine. I am now speaking according to our English notions, which may
wear out, some ages hence, along with others equally absurd. It appears
to me the strongest proof of a clear understanding in Longinus (in every
light acknowledged one of the greatest men among the ancients), when I
find him so far superior to vulgar prejudices as to choose his two
examples of fine writing from a Jew (at that time the most despised
people upon earth) and a woman. Our modern wits would be so far from
quoting, they would scarce own they had read the works of such
contemptible creatures, though, perhaps, they would condescend to steal
from them, at the same time they declared they were below their notice.
This subject is apt to run away with me; I will trouble you with no more
of it."
"Here is no news to be sent you from this place, which has been for this
fortnight and still continues overwhelmed with politics, and which are
of so mysterious a nature, one ought to have some of the gifts of Lilly
or Partridge to be able to write about them; and I leave all those
dissertations to those distinguished mortals who are endowed with the
talent of divination though I am at present the only one of my sex who
seems to be of that opinion, the ladies having shown their zeal and
appetite for knowledge in a most glorious manner. At the last warm
debate in the House of Lords, it was unanimously resolved there should
be no crowd of unnecessary auditors; consequently the fair sex were
excluded, and the gallery destined to the sole use of the House of
Commons. Notwithstanding which determination, a tribe of dames resolved
to show on this occasion that neither men nor laws could resist them.
These heroines were Lady Huntingdon, the Duchess of Queensberry, the
Duchess of Ancaster, Lady Westmorland, Lady Cobham, Lady Charlotte
Edwin, Lady Archibald Hamilton and her daughter, Mrs. Scott, and Mrs.
Pendarves, and Lady Frances Saunderson. I am thus particular in their
names, since I look upon them to be the boldest assertors, and most
resigned sufferers for liberty, I ever read of. They presented
themselves at the door at nine o'clock in the morning, where Sir William
Saunderson respectfully informed them that the Chancellor had made an
order against their admittance. The Duchess of Queensberry, as head of
the squadron, pished at the ill-breeding of a mere lawyer, and desired
him to let them upstairs privately. After some modest refusals, he swore
by G--he would not let them in. Her Grace, with a noble warmth,
answered, by G--they would come in in spite of the Chancellor and the
whole House. This being reported, the Peers resolved to starve them out;
an order was made that the doors should not be opened till they had
raised their siege. These Amazons now showed themselves qualified for
the duty of even foot soldiers; they stood there till five in the
afternoon, without either sustenance or evacuation, every now and then
playing volleys of thumps, kicks, and raps against the door, with so
much violence that the speakers in the House were scarce heard. When the
Lords were not to be conquered by this, the two duchesses (very well
apprised of the use of stratagems in war) commanded a dead silence of
half an hour; and the Chancellor, who thought this a certain proof of
their absence (the Commons also being very impatient to enter), gave
order for the opening of the door, upon which they all rushed in, pushed
aside their competitors, and placed themselves in the front rows of the
gallery. They stayed there till after eleven, when the House rose; and
during the debate gave applause, and showed marks of dislike, not only
by smiles and winks (which have always been allowed in these cases), but
by noisy laughs and apparent contempts; which is supposed the true
reason why poor Lord Hervey spoke miserably. I beg your pardon, dear
madam, for this long relation; but 'tis impossible to be short on so
copious a subject; and you must own this action very well worthy of
record, and I think not to be paralleled in history, ancient or modern."
Lady Mary, however, was less concerned with "the open door" for women in
politics: her primary desire was that a woman should have the right,
within reason, to live her own life, and not merely be a chattel of her
husband. There is the conduct of her own married life to prove her
sincerity.
Her view of the Turkish woman has already been given, as also has her
opinion that marriages should be for the limited period of seven years.
Now, she gave her opinion of the woman question in Italy, and it would
seem that, realising that her own marriage has been anything but
satisfactory to either party, she wrote from her heart.
"I cannot let pass in silence the prodigious alteration, since Misson's
writing, in regard to our sex. This reformation (or, if you please,
depravation) began so lately as the year 1732, when the French overran
this part of Italy; but it has been carried on with such fervour and
success, that the Italian go far beyond their patterns, the Parisian
ladies, in the extent of their liberty. I am not so much surprised at
the women's conduct, as I am amazed at the change in the men's
sentiments. Jealousy, which was once a point of honour among them, is
exploded to that degree, it is the most infamous and ridiculous of all
characters; and you cannot more affront a gentleman than to suppose
him capable of it. Divorces are also introduced, and frequent enough;
they have long been in fashion in Genoa; several of the finest and
greatest ladies there having two husbands alive. The constant pretext is
impotency, to which the man often pleads guilty, and though he marries
again, and has children by another wife, the plea remains good by saying
he was so in regard to his first; and when I told them that in England a
complaint of that kind was esteemed so impudent no reasonable woman
would submit to make it, I was answered we lived without religion, and
that their consciences obliged them rather to strain a point of modesty
than to live in a state of damnation. However, as this method is not
without inconvenience (it being impracticable where there is children),
they have taken another here: the husband deposes upon oath that he has
had a commerce with his mother-in-law, on which the marriage is declared
incestuous and nullified, though the children remain legitimate. You
will think this hard on the old lady, who is scandalised; but it is no
scandal at all, nobody supposing it to be true, without circumstances to
confirm it; but the married couple are set free to their mutual content;
for I believe it would be difficult to get a sentence of divorce, if
either side made opposition: at least I have heard no example of it."
Lady Mary made no secret of her views upon marriage; and though she did
not so frequently air her religious beliefs, she often pondered the
subject, and when challenged to speak was not reticent. As regards
sacred matters, she always had the courage of her convictions, even as
she had in mundane affairs.
"I always, if possible, avoid controversial disputes: whenever I cannot
do it, they are very short" (she wrote to her daughter in October,
1755). "I ask my adversary if he believes in the Scripture? When that is
answered affirmatively their church may be proved, by a child of ten
years old, contradictory to it, in their most important points. My
second question is, if they think St. Peter and St. Paul knew the true
Christian religion? The constant reply is, O yes. Then say I, purgatory,
transubstantiation, invocation of saints, adoration of the Virgin,
relics (of which they might have had a cartload), the observation of
Lent, is no part of it, since they neither taught nor practised any of
these things. Vows of celibacy are not more contrary to nature, than to
the positive precept of St. Paul. He mentions a very common case, in
which people are obliged, by conscience, to marry. No mortal can promise
that case shall never be theirs, which depends on the disposition of the
body as much as a fever; and 'tis as reasonable to engage never to feel
the one as the other. He tells us, the marks of the Holy Spirit are
charity, humility, truth, and long suffering. Can anything be more
uncharitable than damning eternally so many millions for not believing
what they never heard? or prouder than calling their head a Vice-god?
Pious frauds are avowedly permitted, and persecution applauded: these
maxims cannot be dictated by the spirit of peace, which is so warmly
preached in the Gospel. The creeds of the apostles, and council of Nice,
do not speak of the mass, or real presence, as articles of belief; and
Athanasius asserts, whosoever believes according to them shall be saved.
Jesus Christ, in answer to the lawyer, bids him love God above all
things, and his neighbour as himself, as all that is necessary to
salvation. When he describes the last judgment, he does not examine what
sect, or what church, men were of, but how far they had been beneficent
to mankind. Faith cannot determine reward or punishment, being
involuntary, and only the consequence of conviction: we do not believe
what we please, but what appears to us with the face of truth. As I do
not mistake exclamation, invective, or ridicule for argument, I never
recriminate on the lives of their popes and cardinals, when they urge
the character of Henry the Eighth; I only answer, good actions are often
done by all men through interested motives, and 'tis the common method
of Providence to bring good out of evil: history, both sacred and
profane, furnishes many examples of it. When they tell me I have forsook
the worship of my ancestors, I say I have had more ancestors heathen
than Christian, and my faith is certainly ancienter than theirs, since I
have added nothing to the practice of the primitive professors of
Christianity. As to the prosperity or extent of the dominion of their
church, which Cardinal Bellarmin counts among the proofs of its
orthodoxy, the Mahometans, who have larger empires, and have made a
quicker progress, have a better plea for the visible protection of
Heaven. If the fopperies of their religion were only fopperies, they
ought to be complied with, wherever it is established, like any
ridiculous dress in fashion; but I think them impieties: their devotions
are scandal to humanity from their nonsense; the mercenary deceits and
barbarous tyranny of their ecclesiastics, inconsistent with moral
honesty. If they object the diversity of our sects as a mark of
reprobation, I desire them to consider, that objection has equal force
against Christianity in general. When they thunder with the names of
fathers and councils, they are surprised to find me as well (often
better) acquainted with them than themselves. I show them the variety of
their doctrines, their virulent contests and various factions, instead
of that union they boast of. I have never been attacked a second time in
any of the towns where I have resided, and perhaps shall never be so
again after my last battle, which was with an old priest, a learned man,
particularly esteemed as a mathematician, and who has a head and heart
as warm as poor Whiston's. When I first came hither, he visited me every
day, and talked of me everywhere with such violent praise, that, had we
been young people, God knows what would have been said. I have always
the advantage of being quite calm on a subject which they cannot talk of
without heat. He desired I would put on paper what I had said. I
immediately wrote one side of a sheet, leaving the other for his answer.
He carried it with him, promising to bring it the next day, since which
time I have never seen it, though I have often demanded it, being of
my defective Italian. I fancy he sent it to his friend the Archbishop of
Milan. I have given over asking for it, as a desperate debt. He still
visits me, but seldom, and in a cold sort of a way. When I have found
disputants I less respected, I have sometimes taken pleasure in raising
their hopes by my concessions: they are charmed when I agree with them
in the number of the sacraments; but are horridly disappointed when I
explain myself by saying the word sacrament is not to be found either in
Old or New Testament; and one must be very ignorant not to know it is
taken from the listing oath of the Roman soldiers, and means nothing
more than a solemn, irrevocable engagement. Parents vow, in infant
baptism, to educate their children in the Christian religion, which they
take upon themselves by confirmation; the Lord's Supper is frequently
renewing the same oath. Ordination and matrimony are solemn vows of a
different kind: confession includes a vow of revealing all we know, and
reforming what is amiss: extreme unction, the last vow, that we have
lived in the faith we were baptised: in this sense they are all
sacraments. As to the mysteries preached since, they were all invented
long after, and some of them repugnant to the primitive institution."