THE "I AM" CONSCIOUSNESS.

If you just turn in and examine the report of your consciousness

regarding the _self_-dwelling within, you will become conscious of the

"I". But if you press your examination a little closer you will find that

this "I" may be split up into two distinct aspects which, while working

in unison and conjunction, may nevertheless be set apart in thought.

There is an "I" function and there is a "me" function and these mental

twins develop distinct phenomena. The first is the "MASCULINE" principle;

the second is the "FEMININE" principle. Other terms used in current

writings on New Psychology are Conscious Mind, Active Mind, Voluntary

Mind, Objective Mind and so forth. These all refer to the "I" principle.

And the "me" form of mind corresponds to the Sub-Conscious Mind, Passive

Mind, Involuntary Mind, Subjective Mind and so on. Ninety-nine p. c. of

humanity mean this "me" when they say "I". Now let us examine what this

"me" implies. It consists largely of our consciousness, of our body and

physical sensations as associated with touch, taste, smell, sight and

hearing. The consciousness of some of us is largely bound up in the

physical and carnal side of life. We "live there." There are some men who

consider their "clothes" too as being a part of themselves. But as

consciousness rises in the scale of evolution, man begins to "dissociate"

his idea of "me" from the body and he begins to regard his body as a

beloved companion and as "belonging to" him. He then identifies himself

with his mental states, emotions, feelings, likes and dislikes, habits,

qualities and characteristics. But, by and by, he begins to realize how

even these moods also are subject to change, born and die and are subject

to the Principles of Rhythm and Polarity. He realizes faintly that he can

change them by an effort of will and "transmute" them into mental states

of an exactly opposite nature. Then he again begins to "dissociate"

himself from his emotions and feelings and at last through mental

analysis, introspection and concentration, he sets them apart into the

"not I" collection. He begins _then_ to realize that he is something

_above_ his body and emotions. So also with the intellectual

functions. The intellectual man is very apt to think that although his

_physical_ and _emotional_ selves are something different from him and

under his control, _still his intellect is himself_. This is the stage of

"Self-Consciousness". "I control my body and emotions." But as

consciousness unfolds intellectual man finds that he can practically

stand aside and see (mentally, of course) his mind going through various

processes of intellection. Study of Psychology and Logic will enable

you to see how all your intellectual processes may be held at arm's

length, examined, analysed, labelled and discussed quite with the same

ease as the professor talks of a solid, liquid and acriform substances in

his laboratory. So at last he finds that even the wonderful powers of

the Intellect must go into the "not I" collection. This is almost as far

as the average man can realize. You can realize and say "I am not the

body, not the emotions, not the intellect." Therefore you see, that side

of consciousness which is the sum-total of your physical, emotional and

intellectual functions comprises the "me" or Feminine or Passive mental

principle. That which can separate itself in thought from all the above

is the "I" or the Masculine Function. But another step must be taken.

That which you have been taught to regard as the Spiritual Consciousness

(see "Spiritual Consciousness") will also eventually go into the

"Not-I" or "me" collection. In brief, the spiritual mind may be said to

comprise all that is GOOD, NOBLE and GREAT in the field of consciousness.

It is the "Super-Conscious" mind, just now. But, mark this, when through

further evolution, the "I" has mastered this field of consciousness also

and is able to regard it as being the last of the "me" collections, then

it will lose its sense of _relativity_ and _separation_ and the real

individuality, the "I AM" consciousness, will have been realized.

What do I mean? This "I AM" is not the petulant self-assertion of the

relative ego. "I" but really means GOD CONSCIOUSNESS as perfect

Existence, perfect Knowledge or perfect Bliss. It means the realization

of an Infinite and Eternal Self or Individuality. "He that has lost the

self has gained the SELF". Here is the explanation: this little self or

"I" so long as it is attached to the PERSONALITY which is the product

of the "me" consciousness is bound down to the relative plane. It can

think only through only one brain, enjoy through one body and such

happiness as it gets is transitory, short-lived and impermanent because

this world of relative existence is itself essentially changeable. It is

permanent only in its impermanence. So long as the "I" thinks and while

only for the benefits of its personal self, both thinking and willing are

limited and not free. But when it has succeeded in joining itself to the

Spiritual mind and works for, aspires after the Larger Self--the "I

AM"--it has to renounce or "disattach" itself from the personal self and

work under the guidance of the impersonal Higher Self. "I refuse to

be contained within my hat and boots," said Walt Whitman. When the

Vedantist says "Aham Brahmasmi"--"I am the absolute"--he does not mean

this lower "I". No, no. He is not built that way. For him the moorings of

self-consciousness are out. He has lost all sense of his particular

relative "I" and has _one-d_ himself with the absolute "I AM"--the

impersonal, intangible, immortal, omnipotent Self of and over all.

This "I am" is Spirit or Atman. There can be but one Individuality--that

of the Absolute. It becomes objectively expressed in man as Cosmic

Consciousness. Subjectively it is God. Now then you have an idea of

the "I am" Consciousness. Hold fast to it. It is your real, Larger Self.

In the understanding and the exercise of the Will-Power the "I" or the

Positive Mental Principle is the chief factor. To use the one you must

understand the other. Will is a Soul-Power. This "I"--as I have explained

it above--is negative to the "I AM" or God--both meaning the

same thing. It is positive in relation to the Higher Self. This "I" is

the future promise of the "I AM". It is true it shall lose itself in

finding its Self, but so does the child when it grows into full manhood.

Christ was one with his Father-in-Heaven (i.e., on the spiritual plane)

and therefore he could still the waves and raise the dead. Yet just you

examine the nature of Lord Christ's Will-Force. Think of his constant

retirement into the Silence in order to obtain inspiration for his work

in the objective universe. Again, note his utter indifference to and

absolute control over his personal self. Did he care whether his body

would live or die? Did he live for the enjoyments of the flesh? Did he

"play to the gallery" and act and speak for any worldly gain or low

considerations? No! He had forgotten the interests of the flesh in his

earnest enthusiasm in the cause of the Eternal Spirit. He was not moved

by any dammed sense of prudence and caution. He drew the "Motives" that

energised his Will-Power in the life of Action from _Within_. Nothing

from outside, nothing from the world of lower attractions could in the

least swerve his inner determination or unbalance his brain. Do you or

can you prepare yourself to follow in his steps? Then my first point and

the most infallible method of awakening your Will-Power is this:

(_a_) Teach Thy Will to "Resist and Renounce." Strengthen your Will-Power

by Renunciation. By Resistance is not meant outer resistance or

aggressiveness. I find that all the modern teachers of Hypnotism advise

their students to develop Will-Power by exercising it upon others. This

is placing the cart before the horse. We Hindus know better. No; by

Resistance to and Repression of your lower Desire-Nature is meant letting

the more difficult choice exercise its compelling and restraining power

over the easier one. Says Sister Nivedita: "The Indian ideal is that man

whose lower mind is so perfectly under control that he can at any moment

plunge into the thought-ocean and remain there at will without the least

possibility of a sudden break and unexpected return to the life of the

senses." Yes, your interests should be within and not without. _You must

rise above all personal impulse_. Even in this world you find that men of

distinction, fame and honour have achieved recognition by practising a

little _self-denial_, which is a "milder" form of absolute Renunciation

as practised by true Sanyasis. The man who can work at his aim with

perseverance and denies himself the mess of pottage of present indulgence

in view of some future gain develops Will-Power. So in training your Will

to 'resist', you must, as a first step, sternly refuse to indulge

impulses, desires and tendencies not in consonance with the dictates of

your Higher Self. You must actually go out of your way and "deny"

yourself the little or great "comforts" to which you are or have been

accustomed. The strongest-willed man is he who has the greatest control

over his inclinations, and who can 'force' himself to do such things as

he is naturally most inclined to do. This is a characteristic which

cannot be developed in a day. There are some children and even grown-up

men and women who mistake their 'obstinacy' for Will-Power. They want a

thing and when they do not get it they tear their hair, gnash their

teeth, stamp their feet and fly into a terrible passion. Since people

think that these uncontrolled creatures are strong-willed while all that

you could say about them is that _they are utter slaves to their

desires_. You must practise self-denial in fifty different ways and force

yourself to do certain things, 'little and big,' every day purely for

developing this power of Resistance. No short-cut to this. Some children

develop it unconsciously by 'forcing' themselves to study when they might

play, and by applying themselves to such studies as are dry and

uninteresting to them they thus practise voluntary Concentration.

Practise self-denial in every possible way. Cut off such luxuries as you

think "you must have." "Take a cold bath when you would prefer a warm

one. Arise promptly in the morning. Make yourself call upon people you

have avoided. Stand up in a street car when you would prefer sitting;

walk when it is convenient to ride. Make engagements with yourself and

keep them. Promise yourself that when you see something to be done you

will spring at once to it however strong may be the inclination to put it

off awhile" and back of it all let there be the auto-suggestion: "_I am

doing all these hard things in order to build up my Will-Power and each

time 'I' succeed in forcing 'my mind' to do a thing or not to do it I

make the next victory easier and my Will-Power stronger_." Of course the

above is only a hint as to your line of practise.

(_b_) You must not give yourself such hard tasks of Self-Development

as might be too heavy and beyond the present strength of your Will.

In denying yourself you develop self-control. In forcing yourself to do

certain things you develop powers of Self-Expression. In one the Will

moves along negative lines. In the other along positive lines. Both are

necessary. The man who cannot control and command himself can never

develop and express Himself. But be sure to begin with easy things and

then as you gain in confidence you may attempt more difficult feats.

(_c_) The faculties of Courage and Confidence are essentially important.

Nothing weakens the will so much as Fear and lack of Self-Confidence.

Self-Confidence is not blustering self-conceit. That within you which

says "I CAN" when calmly and doggedly backed by your "I Will" when

deliberately translated into action develops Will-Force and commands

startling results.

(_d_) Always hold these words before your passive Mind:

1. Earnestness. 2. Determination. 3. Courage. 4. Confidence.

5. Stick-to-it-ive-ness. 6. Patience. 7. I can and I will.

(_e_) The tendency of the Masculine function of your mind to "I" is

towards giving, expressing or projecting energy; that of the Feminine

is towards generating and creating mental progeny such as thoughts,

mental energy, new habits, etc. It is why the Feminine Principle has

been called the "mental womb" by ancient philosophers. It comprises

also the faculty of Imagination. The Masculine function does the work

of the 'Will' in its varied phases. The Feminine function receives

impressions and generates mental offspring in the form of new thoughts,

ideas, concepts, thought-habits and so forth. Its powers of creative

energy are strikingly marvellous and have been proved and attested

to in Psychological experiments conducted by the best known mental

scientists of the day. _But "positive" mental energy must be projected by

the 'I' into the Passive Mind through concentration, suggestion and

willing before the latter can be started to work along any line of

creative effort._ This suggestion may be given by you to your

sub-conscious mind or it may come as an outer impression. Unless you

control your Passive Mind, it is sure to be controlled by others. Then

you are a slave. Now in cultivating the above seven qualities, you

should take up _one_ word at a time and let the outer form sink into your

mind. Place yourself in a relaxed and passive condition. Close your eyes

and picture the _form_ of the word to yourself, for instance,

D-E-T-E-R-M-I-N-A-T-I-O-N. Employ the Imagination and visualize mentally.

This done, _i.e._, when the word-picture is well photographed upon your

mind and fastened in place, your next step will be to picture yourself

the Ideas, qualities, physical and mental characteristics, etc.,

associated with the word. Your third step is to calmly, concentratedly

and confidently command your Passive Mind to generate that quality.

Remember, your mind will at first rebel, but a very little persistence

will lead to complete success. Repeat the auto-suggestions daily at the

same time. See that it manifests in Action. Act it out as often as

possible. Of course your efforts will be imperfect to begin with, but,

never mind, go ahead, keeping firm hold on your "I can and I will" in

spite of all things and success is quite certain. Once you have developed

these seven qualities, you can do anything.

(_f_) Do not let your friends or anyone--no matter who!--deflect

you from your resolutions. "Let not thy right hand know what thy left

hand does." Talk never. Let results show. The Lord has hidden himself

best and His work is wonderful beyond compare! Your very friends

and relatives will spit upon you for lacking any of these qualities. Do

not ever impose your will upon others, but never let others to impose

upon you against the sanction of your own judgment. In fact, none can

unless you are a weakling and fickle-minded.

(_g_) Frequent the company of chaste, strong-willed men and you

cannot but grow strong.

(_h_) Read Literature on this subject and obtain all possible aid

through Knowledge.

(_i_) If your faculty of imagination and idealism are undeveloped,

cultivate them, because it is these two that make a god of a man.

Philosophers, scholars, poets and musicians have them well-developed. But

where imagination is uncontrolled by higher reason and where idealism

is not backed by a strong will, there you have the idle 'dreamer of

dreams' and such a state of mind is reprehensible and pitiable indeed!

(_j_) Will-Power grows by faith in one's ability by exercise; by

devotion to the UNCONDITIONED SPIRIT.

(_k_) In your efforts to develop Will-Power, be not afraid that your

health will break down. In fact, Perfect Health is the result of a

perfect Will. Deny the power of disease and weakness over yourself. "_I

can never be ill. My body is my slave. It shall always manifest perfect

health_." Convince your passive mind--which has charge of your body--of

this by repeated commands, demands and assertions. Always think of your

body as being as strong as adamant. Never talk of either health or

disease or weakness. You must be above caring for these. They are

your Natural rights. Only when you lower yourself they have power

to trouble you. Go beyond the lower self. Your business is to care for

the Higher-Self--that in which "You" live, move, and have your being.

Also teach and train your Will to move along negative lines of

self-repression as well as along positive lines of Self-Expression.

Balance both. The former precedes the latter. Now I will pass on to the

subject of SELF-CONTROL, with the distinct understanding that

Self-Control and Will-Power are inextricably bound up in each other. You

Get the real "practical work" in the endeavour for Self-Control.