The Rev. L. Grout says in his _Zululand_ (166):
"So long as the government allows the custom called
_ukulobolisha_, the selling of women in marriage for
cattle, just so long the richer and so, for the most
part, the older and the already married man will be
found, too often, the successful suitor--not indeed at
the feet of the maiden, for she is allowed little or no
right to a voice as to whom she shall marry, but at the
hands of her heathen proprietor, who, in his
degradation, looks less at the affections and
preferences of his daughter than at the surest way of
filling his kraal with cattle, and thus providing for
buying another wife or two."
So purely commercial is the transaction that if a wife proves very
fruitful and healthy, a demand for more cattle is made on her husband
(165). Should she be feeble or barren he may send her back to her
father and demand compensation. A favorite way is to retain a wife as
a slave and go on marrying other girls as fast as the man's means
allow. Theal says (213) that if a wife has no children the husband has
a right to return her to her parents and if she has a marriageable
sister, take her in exchange. But the acme of commercialism is reached
in a Zulu marriage ceremony described by Shooter. At the wedding the
matrons belonging to the bridegroom's party tell the bride that too
many cows have been given for her; that she is rather plain than
otherwise, and will never be able to do a married woman's work, and
that altogether it is very kind of the bridegroom to condescend to
marry her. Then the bride's friends have their innings. They condole
with her parents on the very inadequate number of cows paid for her,
the loveliest girl in the village; declare that the husband is quite
unworthy of her, and ought to be ashamed for driving such a hard
bargain with her parents.
Leslie's assertion (194) that it is "a mistake to imagine that a girl
is sold by her father in the same manner and with the same authority
with which he would dispose of a cow," is contradicted by the
concurrent testimony of the leading authorities. Some of these have
already been cited. The reliable Fritsch says (112) of the Ama-Xosa
branch:
"It is characteristic that as a rule the inclination of
the girl to be married is never consulted, but that her
nearest male relatives select a husband for her to whom
she is unceremoniously sent. They choose, of course, a
man who can pay."
If she is a useful girl he is not likely to refuse the offer, yet he
bargains to get her as cheaply as possible (though he knows that a
Kaffir girl's chief pride is the knowledge that many heads of cattle
were paid for her). Regarding the Ama-Zulu, Fritsch says (141-42) that
the women are slaves and a wife is regarded as so much invested
capital. "If she falls ill, or remains childless, so that the man does
not get his money's worth, he often returns her to her father and asks
his cattle back." Older and less attractive women are sometimes
married off on credit, or to be paid for in instalments. "In all
this," Fritsch sums up, "there is certainly little of poetry and
romance, but it cannot be denied that under the influence of European
residents an improvement has been effected in some quarters." He
himself saw at Natal a young couple who "showed a certain interest in
each other," such as one expects of married persons; but in parts
untouched by European influence, he adds, true conjugal devotion is an
unusual thing.