If, however, there is no bridal reception on the wedding-day, but
the young people "receive" after their return from the bridal
tour, the card containing their joint names contains also the date
of reception, as:
MR. AND MRS. T. L. BURNS
AT HOME,
_Wednesday, Novenber 17th,_
FROM 11 TILL 2 O'CLOCK.
No. 614 --- STREET.
Or,
MR. AND MRS. T. L. BURNS
AT HOME,
_Wednesdays in Novemnber,_
FROM 11 TILL 2 O'CLOCK.
No. 614 --- STREET.
The bridal calls are not expected to be returned until the last
day of reception.
The bridegroom should give to the first groomsman the control of
affairs, and the money for the necessary expenses. He it is who
presents the snowy bouquet to the bride, the bridegroom making a
similar offering to the bridesmaids. It is the first groomsman who
leads the visitors up to the young couple for the words of
congratulation. It is he who gives the clergyman his fee, who
engages the carriages, and, in short, makes all arrangements. If,
as is often the case, the whole bridal party go to the depot to
see the happy pair start for the wedding trip, it is then the
first groomsman who secures tickets, checks baggage, and secures
pleasant seats for the Benedict and bride. It is his duty, also,
to send the notice of the marriage to the newspapers. In England
but one groomsman, or "best man," is allowed to a bridal party,
though the bridesmaids may number a dozen, but in this country one
groomsman is allowed for every bridesmaid.
If the wedding takes place in church, it is customary to reserve
the front seats in the body of the church for the relatives of the
young couple.
It is the height of rudeness for _any one_, whether clergyman,
bridegroom, or any member of the bridal train, to keep the bride
waiting. The clergyman should be within the rails, the bridegroom
and groomsmen should be in the vestry-room, by the time bride is
due at the church. The bridesmaids may receive the bride in the
vestibule, or may accompany her to the church.
The bridal party should meet in the vestry-room. Then the bride,
leaning on the arm of her father, heads the procession; the
bridegroom, with the bride's mother upon his arm, follows; then
groomsmen and bridesmaids in couples follow.
At the altar, the bridegroom receives the bride, and the ceremony
begins. The groomsmen stand behind the bridegroom, the bridesmaids
behind the bride. The bride and bridegroom remove the right hand-
glove in some churches; in others it is not deemed necessary. The
bride stands on the left of the groom.
When the wedding takes place at the house of the bride, it is
customary to divide the room, either by folding doors or a
curtain, and allow the bridal party to be grouped before their
friends see them. If, however, this is not convenient, they enter
in the same order as in church. It is somewhat customary of late
for the bride and groom to walk arm-in-arm to the altar; but it is
against established etiquette; the bride should walk with her
father, or, if orphaned, with whoever takes the father's place on
the occasion.
Where a ring is used, it is the duty of the first bridesmaid to
remove the bride's left-hand glove.
After the ceremony, the parents of the bride speak to her first;
then the parents of the bridegroom before other friends. After the
ceremony, the bride and groom go in the same carriage from the
church to the house, or from the house to the railway depot.
If there is a breakfast or supper, the bride does not change her
dress until she assumes her travelling dress.
If parties are given to the bride and groom, the groomsmen and
bridesmaids must be also invited, and, if they prefer, all may
wear the dress worn at the wedding. This is, however, optional.
During the fortnight following a wedding, friends of the family
should call upon the mother of the bride.
It is contrary to etiquette to wear mourning to a wedding. Even in
the case of a widowed mother to either of the happy pair, it is
customary to wear gray, or some neutral tint, upon the wedding-
day, even if the deepest mourning is resumed afterwards.
The bridal dress and the costume of the bridesmaids are not
matters that come so much within the province of etiquette as of
the fashions, which vary as the winds. All that etiquette requires
is that good taste shall guide the whole of the arrangements. Pure
white is the only color worn by the young bride, and the full veil
of lace, with wreath of orange flowers, is _de rigueur_; but for a
widow, pearl-color or tinted silk, without any veil or wreath, is
better. If the bride is a maiden no longer young, it is not in
good taste to wear the dress of a youthful bride. White gloves,
vests, and ties are demanded for the bridegroom and groomsmen. The
bridesmaids may wear colors, but a prettier effect is produced by
dresses of pure white, with trimmings only of color. The
travelling dress of a bride should be very modest in color and
fashion, as it is in extremely bad taste to draw attention to the
_bride_ when travelling.
It is not etiquette, at a wedding or wedding reception, to
congratulate the bride; it is the bridegroom who receives
congratulations; the bride, wishes for her future happiness. A
gentleman or lady who is acquainted with both bride and groom must
speak first to the bride; but if a stranger to either, may first
speak to the one with whom he is already acquainted, who will then
introduce the other. If a stranger to both bride and groom, the
first groomsman must make the introduction.