TRUFFALDINO, EUNUCHS. _The foregoing._
TRUFFALDINO.
(_Aside._) You ass! (_Aloud._) Stop bleating
and shaking your tags, you old ram you! (_In a
kindly tone._) You're going to have a fine time
of it to-day, old boy.
BARAK.
I'm wanted in the harem. Good! let us go.
TRUFFALDINO.
Ass! you're going to have a fine time of it,
you old baa-baa. And I'll help you. Against
all the rules of etiquette and good breeding, I
condescend to introduce you alive into the harem.
Can you appreciate the height of your good fortune?
H'm! A vigorous old chap like you!
Inside the most holy seraglio? Baa! Baa! All
those pretty ladies? Baa! Baa! Eh! is that
nothing to you? Baa! Baa! (_More to the
public._) As a rule, we are very particular on
this point--absolutely rigorous. As a rule, not
even a flea is admitted into the harem before it
has been carefully examined to see whether it's
a male or a female. We tickle it, and if it
laughs it's a she. Females have a silk thread
tied round their left leg. Males are immediately
executed. Baa! Baa! And now you have this
good fortune thrust upon you.
BARAK.
I know the Princess sends you after _me_.
What of the woman there? I know her not.
TRUFFALDINO.
Thou knowest her not! Baa! Baa! Thou
art a liar, old chap. Thou liest in thy throat,
thou silvery ram. Thou knowest her not! Thou
paralytic pack of prevarication! This buxom
smiling lady, with her attractive, plump figure,
thou knowest her not? Thou thrice-bleached
hypocrite! And all the time you share all she
has, year in, year out, as far as you are able to.
Baa! Baa! I'll help you. Baa! Baa! I'll
teach you to tell me lies! Baa! Baa! Me,
the Grand Eunuch of China! (_Beckons to the
eunuchs to bring_ SKIRINA _closer to_ BARAK.) Well,
do you know her now? This lady? Your wife,
you wretch, you wretch! Baa! Baa!
SKIRINA.
I can't make head or tail of it.
BARAK.
Remember
What I have said. And hold your tongue.
Poor fool,
You have now what you wanted.
SKIRINA.
Heaven help us!
TRUFFALDINO.
(_To the eunuchs._) Up! Take the pair of
'em between you. Slope swords! Halt! Attention!
Eyes front! Quick march!