MARTIAL DOINGS
After that grand victory over the clergy, "The Light of Sarrio" resumed
its successful and prosperous course. The boisterous, vehement
harbor-master was able to continue his civilizing crusade without fear
of any more ambuscades. Sinforoso did not give up his post; however, he
never went home without being accompanied by Maza or some other friend,
both being well armed.
But Gabino Maza, who was always captious, knew how to make a malicious
use of the rupture with the Church by appealing to the consciences of
several of the townsfolk. Not that he was a strict Catholic, or cared a
rap whether the whole priestcraft were rooted up like parsley, or not,
for his ideas had always been somewhat heterodox, and the clergy had
long considered him beyond the pale, yet he was the one now to be
shocked.
"After all," he said, "we have been brought up to respect religion,
which is the only curb upon a town, and people can not be allowed to
ride rough-shod over the sacred beliefs of our wives," etc.
These perfidious insinuations caused several people to give up their
subscriptions to the paper.
The editor and the proprietor, who divined the source of the blow, were
greatly indignant; but Gabino Maza, seconded by the no less
irrepressible Delaunay, did not relax in his contentious campaign. If
any of the staff of "The Light" were present nothing was said, but
directly they left tongues wagged freely and furiously. Sometimes
seriously and sometimes jokingly they discussed all who were concerned
with the paper, more especially, as was only logical, its highest
representative--the eminent Don Rosendo. They said (oh! disgraceful
conduct!) that it was only the desire of seeing himself in print which
had inspired him with the philanthropic movement of lighting the torch
of progress in Sarrio; that Don Rufo, the doctor, was an impostor;
Sinforoso, a poor thing--a broken reed to lean upon; Alvaro Pena (here
the voices were lowered and furtive looks cast round), a blusterer
without a spice of justice in him; Don Feliciano Gomez, a poor devil who
had better look after his own not very flourishing affairs; Don
Rudesindo, a great brawler who was only trying to let his storehouse and
advertise his cider; and as to the originator and promoter of the
enterprise, Don Rosendo, they said that he had always been a stupid
fool, who had thought himself an author when in fact he understood
nothing but the rise and fall of the price of codfish.
Only the imperious duty of acting as faithful and impartial chroniclers
obliges us to record such remarks; for of a truth it is much against the
grain--the pen itself even seeming to revolt in one's hand against
writing down such abominable things.
The backbiters abstained from speaking against Don Pedro Miranda because
they had already asked him to withdraw from the periodical, which he
seemed inclined to do after the skirmish with the clergy; for Don Pedro
was an old Christian, and a great friend of the Augustinian chaplain.
The malignant remarks were successful in setting some of the influential
ladies of the town against the paper, among whom was Dona Brigida; so
the foolish and degraded Marin went over to their side at the Club.
The dissentient side was also increased by the drunken mayor, for a
feeling of fellowship with the frequenters of the cafe, and the vexation
caused him by the constant excitement of the press, made him quickly
retire from the great reform movement. That which finally set him
against "The Light" and its staff was a paragraph in which the mayor and
the corporation were severely censured for the license they allowed the
town police and the little they did to render Sarrio a pleasant seaside
resort for distinguished scrofulous patients in the summer.
Although they outwardly behaved as friends, a veiled, silent enmity
reigned among the chief frequenters of the Club, and this increased day
by day, thanks to the mischief-makers, who never cease on such occasions
to air the differences and dislikes. Thenceforth they avoided quarrels
and disputes because the angry cries and insulting terms which meant
nothing in former days were now, thanks to the cordial dislike which
existed among them all, fraught with much danger.
Therefore greater silence and more courtesy reigned in the resort, but
it was accompanied with less frankly and cordiality. That strange state
of feeling could not last long. Among people meeting every day and not
being very cordial with each other, a quarrel is soon inevitable. It
happened thus.
There arrived at the saloon, no one knew how, a copy of a certain
Catalonian illustrated paper, where, among other pictures, was one
representing the banks of an American river, upon which a dozen
crocodiles were disporting themselves. Maza had the paper in his hand
when Rufo came up behind him and said in a jocular tone:
"A lot of crocodiles, eh?"
"They are not crocodiles," returned Maza in a dry, disdainful tone,
without raising his head.
"And why are they not?" asked the doctor, wounded by the tone.
"Because they are not."
"That is no reason."
"If you don't know, study; I am not here to teach you for nothing."
"Tut! The sage of Greece. Stand off, gentlemen!"
"I am not a sage, but I say these animals are not crocodiles, for there
are no crocodiles in the river Maranon."
"What are they, then?"
"Alligators."
"Call them what you like! Alligators and crocodiles are the same."
"Another atrocity! Where did you learn that?"
"Why, man, it is a well-known fact that the alligator and crocodile only
differ in name. Here is Don Lorenzo, who has traveled, and can tell us
whether it is not so."
"The alligator is rather smaller," observed Don Lorenzo, with a
conciliatory smile.
"The size is of little consequence. The question is whether it has the
same form or not."
Don Lorenzo nodded in sign of assent. Maza jumped up in a fury:
"But, gentlemen! But, gentlemen! Are we among cultivated people or among
country clowns? Where do you find that crocodiles are the same as
alligators? The crocodile is an animal of the Old World, and the
alligator of the New."
"Excuse me, friend Maza, but I have seen crocodiles in the Philippines,"
returned Don Rudesindo.
"Well, and what if you have?"
"Because you say crocodiles don't belong to the Old World--"
"No more they do! Are not the Philippines in the New World? Gentlemen,
gentlemen, open your umbrellas, for fooleries are raining down now."
"What? Do you mean to say that the Philippines are not in the other
hemisphere?" asked Don Rudesindo, his face distorted with rage.
"Never mind; never mind; go on."
"The chief difference between the crocodile and the alligator,"
intervened Don Lorenzo in a tone of authority, "is that the crocodile
has three rows of teeth, and the alligator only two."
"It is not so, sir; it is not so! Crocodiles have the same rows of teeth
as alligators."
Don Lorenzo received this remark with indignation, and Don Rudesindo
came to his support; Maza, seconded by Delaunay, was not less furious
in his attack. Several members of the Club soon joined in the dispute,
which got warmer every minute. The voices were deafening. If they had
had three rows of teeth like the crocodiles, or even two, I do not doubt
that they would have devoured each other, seeing the rage and passion
with which they showed the one set with which nature had endowed them.
Maza was so aggressive and so insolent that at last Don Rudesindo, no
longer master of himself, gave him a blow on the head with his umbrella.
The subsequent conflict of sticks and umbrellas made a noise so terrible
that it would have struck terror into the bravest heart. Several who had
no recollection of having given any opinion on the teeth of the reptiles
in question received their share of umbrella blows the same as those who
had discoursed upon the subject. The master and several other people
came upstairs, the West Indians left off playing billiards, Don Melchor
de las Cuevas, a person of influence in war as well as in peace,
mediated between the combatants, and the disturbance was finally
quelled, but it was some months before their tempers cooled down.
The result was, that from that day Gabino Maza, Delaunay, Don Roque,
Marin, and three or four other members left the Club. Don Pedro Miranda
only appeared between long intervals of absence, which made the
remaining members and the staff of "The Light" see that they could not
count upon him, and that it would not be long before he joined the other
side, as indeed it came to pass. The dissenting party used to meet in
the Cafe de Londres in the Calle de Caborana, but not many months later
the news ran through the town that they had taken a storehouse in the
Calle de San Florencio in which to hold their meetings; and so it was.
They had the floor boarded and carpeted, the walls and ceilings painted,
and after furnishing it with several chairs and armchairs, they began
going there as regularly as they had formerly gone to the Club. As the
roof was low, and there was a ledge in the wall on which Marin used to
take his afternoon nap, the place soon went by the name of the "Cabin"
in the town, and the name clung to it. The staff of "The Light" treated
the deserters with scorn as long as they had no roof under which to
assemble, but now the matter assumed importance, and the first symptom
of fear was evinced in an article, or a screed in blank verse,
describing the new meeting-place, and bringing each of the members into
notice under the names of different animals: Maza, a fish; Delaunay, a
crowing cock; Marin, an ass; Don Roque, a pig, etc.
This exasperated the "Cabin" party in an inexpressible way. Don Rosendo
became more and more pushing and active in his press campaign, and he
essayed to introduce into "The Light" all the forms and customs that he
noticed in the national and foreign press, more especially the French.
He commissioned a clerk in Madrid to send him, every Wednesday, a
telegram of twenty words, and moreover to write him political and
literary letters. He translated all the foreign notices that appeared in
periodicals, even those of fashion, courts of justice, and theatres; but
where he distinguished himself was in the market column. It is not easy
to describe the cleverness with which he treated the subject of cereals,
oils, spirituous liquors, rice, etc. To show the intelligence and
brilliance he brought to bear on such a prosaic matter we must quote one
of his paragraphs in which he wrote:
"Sugars, alive to these variations, remain low, and will not attain any
permanent rise until coffees, cocoas, and all foreign produce restrain
their violent oscillations." It was, in fact, the soul of the paper.
Nevertheless, he had not done enough to realize his ideal. Belinchon had
always followed with the greatest interest the personal polemics of the
Parisian press, which generally ended in a duel. And these proceedings
afforded him such exquisite pleasure that no banquet could be more
congenial and delightful to his taste. When several days passed without
this excitement Don Rosendo languished. The descriptions of the
assaults of arms among the celebrated fencers of the capital were of
equal interest to him, and although he found fencing expressions--_Engagement
de sixte_, _Battement en quarte_, _Contreriposet_, _Feinte_,_
etc._--were somewhat confusing, he translated them in his own way, and
pretended to be quite conversant with them. He said there was no surer
sign of the state of the culture of a country than in its devotion to
arms. The practise aroused and inspired the idea of human honor and
dignity, and their abandonment brought dishonor and degradation. He knew
better than their own relations the biography of all the great duelists
and fencers in Paris, and he could give a detailed and minute
description of all the duels that had taken place, with their
accompanying wounds.
When an assault of arms was announced between two masters like Jacob and
Grisier, our friend was greatly excited; he eagerly opened the "Figaro"
every day, and mentally backed the one or the other.
One day in bed--his best ideas seemed always to come to him there--it
occurred to him that to be a journalist without a knowledge of the use
of arms was like being a dancer without the power of playing the
castanets. One day, when least expected, a blow might fell him to the
ground if he were ignorant of the art of parrying it. It was true that
nobody in Sarrio was versed in the science of fencing, but then nobody
was under a strong obligation to attain it. There might be some dispute
between him and a journalist of Lancia or Madrid, and then he would have
to let himself be assassinated! These thoughts led him to adopt the
resolution of learning to use the foil at all costs. How? Why, by
sending for a master to come to Sarrio, as he could not leave the place.
Without communicating the idea to anybody, he wrote to a friend in Paris
to look out in the fencing clubs for a teacher, even if second rate, who
would be willing to expatriate himself. At the end of some time, such a
one was found who, for the sum of two thousand francs a year, with the
liberty of giving other lessons, would settle in the Biscayan town.
The news went forth that a professor of fencing, Monsieur Lemaire, had
arrived in the schooner "Julia" for the sole purpose of teaching Don
Rosendo the noble art of self-defense.
And, in fact, our friend was soon seen in the company of a slight,
red-haired young man of foreign appearance. The people were
horror-struck, for in a little town where blows with fists and sticks
are given and taken the coldbloodedness, formality, and gravity of duels
inspire horror and terror. They first thought that Don Rosendo wished to
kill somebody, and it was only after some time that they understood the
reason of the step. Don Rosendo entered into the matter with the ardor
and gravity that it deserved. He devoted an hour every morning, and two
more in the afternoon, to perfecting himself in lunging, which was all
that the professor allowed him to do for the first two months. The most
noteworthy result of this exercise was that at the end of some days he
did not know whether his legs were his own, or whether they really
belonged to another rational biped like himself. So sharp and strong
were the pains to which he became subject that even in his dreams he
thought he was still lunging, and jumped up with cries of pain. Then
Monsieur Lemaire was so cruel that he was never satisfied with the
efforts made by the good gentleman. "Try again, again, again!" and Don
Rosendo had to stretch and strain himself to such a degree that he felt
as if he were being sawed asunder. When the noble exercise was over
Senor Belinchon, being nearly bowed to the ground with pain, was obliged
to hold by the furniture to get from one room to another; and the noble
founder of "The Light of Sarrio" walked henceforth to the end of his
days as if he were bandy legged. But these tortures, similar to those
endured by martyrs in Japan, he bore, if not with pleasure, with heroic
endurance, as he remembered at what enormous sacrifices the improvement
of one's self and one's country is attained.
At the end of two months the eternal tic-tac of the foils commenced:
_Degagez; coup droit; degagez; un, deux; degagez, doublez._ But the
torture of the legs was not herewith relaxed. Don Rudesindo, Alvaro
Pena, Sinforoso, Pablito, the printer Folgueras, and several others took
lessons at the same time. In the hall the fencers were so overwhelmed by
their belligerent feelings that solemn silence reigned. Nothing was
heard but the sharp voice of Monsieur Lemaire incessantly repeating in
an absent fashion: _En garde vivement--Contre de quarte--Ripostez--Ah
bien!--En garde vivement--Contre de sixte--Ripostez--Ah bien!--Parez
seconde--Ripostu--Well done!_ Don Rosendo thought he was transported to
Paris, and he saw a Grisier, Anatole de la Forge, and the Baron de
Basancour in Don Rudesindo, Folgueras, and Sinforoso.
"The Light" no longer seemed to be "The Light," but "Le Gaulois" or "Le
Journal des Debats."
At the end of five months he was well versed in the art of self-defense;
he could parry direct blows, he could attack with a shortened arm, and
he could spring forward to perfection. He then thought the time had come
for a scandal to take place. It behooved the town to know that all the
money expended on the fencing lessons had not been thrown away; besides,
he wished to imbue the place with a taste for the refinements of the
great capitals. But with whom in Sarrio could he pick a quarrel? However
willingly he might quarrel with one of the members of the Cabin, he knew
that the only one capable of fighting was Gabino Maza, and he held him
somewhat in awe, especially since he had heard the professor say that
one had to be very careful with violent men, even if they could not
fence. After long and profound consideration he thought the best thing
to do was to pick a quarrel with some journalist of Lancia through the
discussion carried on by "The Light" with "The Future" about a
particular branch road, and this plan he carried into execution. In the
next number he showed himself so aggressive and so insolent to the paper
of the capital that, surprised and indignant, it replied that certain
remarks in "The Light" were only worthy of contempt.
Whereupon Don Rosendo commissioned his friends Alvaro Pena and Sinforoso
Suarez to take his challenge to the editor of "The Future." So the two
gentlemen went to Lancia, and returned the same day.
On seeing them come back Senor Belinchon ardently hoped that the affair
might have been amicably settled without the necessity of fighting,
although he had been the one to demand satisfaction, which is a fresh
proof of his singularly exalted soul and the exquisite sensibility with
which he was endowed. Unfortunately, however, the editor of "The Future"
had remained firm, and the seconds had arranged a duel with swords which
was to come off the following day at an estate in the Lancian suburbs.
On learning this our hero felt his legs tremble, not with fear--that
nobody would dare imagine--but with emotion at finding himself about to
be the object of public curiosity and attention. As they were walking
toward home, Pena said to him with rough frankness:
"The Villar party wanted to have the sword points blunted, but I said:
'I know Don Rosendo very well, and he is a man who abhors childishness;
you can not trifle with him. When one has to do with a quarrel like this
it has to be treated seriously. I am certain that if we blunted the
points there would be a row with him. Was not that what you would have
said?"
"Exactly. Many thanks, Alvaro," returned Senor Belinchon, giving him a
hand which Pena found rather cold, and he added in a weak voice:
"But if the points were a trifle filed I would not mind agreeing to
that. The affair, after all, does not precisely exact death."
"I did not dare to agree to it. Not knowing your opinion, I feared to
vex you."
"Not at all--not at all. I would not mind their being filed."
"Well, now it can't be. The conditions are arranged and unless they
suggest it again the points will have to be sharp. That will suit you,
as you know how to use the foil."
"And precisely for that reason I did not wish to take any unfair
advantage of my adversary."
To this remark Pena gave a knowing wink.
"Don't be so scrupulous, Don Rosendo. If you can run him through
_first!_ like a little bird, don't hesitate to do so."
The officer accompanied these last words with an expressive pass in the
air with the tips of his fingers, as if he were inserting them in a
human body.
Don Rosendo made a gesture of repugnance, and after keeping silent for
some time he said sullenly:
"What I fear is, that these cursed pains will not let me lunge
properly."
"Tush! man, don't trouble about that. You won't feel any pain in your
legs during the duel. Haven't you ever found that a toothache goes away
directly you arrive at the dentist's door to have it drawn?"
This consolatory simile provoked a roar of laughter from the officer
which lasted for some time, while Belinchon remained grave and
depressed, as it behooves heroes to be on the eve of battle. The news
of the approaching duel ran through the place like an electric shock.
The excitement of the townsfolk was indescribable. It never entered
anybody's head that a person advanced in years, with a married daughter,
could cross swords with any one on the question of a branch road.
Nevertheless Belinchon's party admired the firmness and bravery of their
chief, who had a fearful nightmare that night. He dreamed that the sword
of the editor of "The Future" cut him in two. The conqueror carried off
one-half as a trophy, and only the other half returned to Sarrio. His
cries awoke him, and filled Dona Paula with such alarm that she fetched
the anti-spasm medicine. Belinchon, with the fortitude of heroic
temperaments, said nothing to his consort, but he took a dose of the
mixture.
On the following day he went off to Lancia in a carriage, accompanied by
Pena, Sinforoso, and Don Rufo, with two swords. Upon leaving the town
more than a hundred persons were waiting in the road to see them off.
Don Rosendo felt quite overcome.
"Good luck! You'll send a telegram, eh? It shall not be said that Sarrio
was beaten by Lancia."
Don Rosendo pressed the hands of his partizans with emotion. They all
offered to accompany him, and vowed vengeance in case of his perishing
in the duel. At last they reached the appointed spot, and there they met
the enemy.
The seconds conferred with each other, and the swords were produced and
put into the hands of the combatants, whose faces had assumed the color
befitting such solemn occasions, which is that of bottle green varied
with an orange hue. Once on the defensive, and the word of attack given,
they both began brandishing the swords methodically, first on one side
and then on the other, with a lugubrious, terror-striking sound. At the
end of some time Villar ventured to raise his weapon with the intention
of wounding his adversary's head. But lo! Don Rosendo gave such a
prodigious leap backward that the seconds looked at each other in
astonishment. Villar, also surprised, waited for his adversary to return
to the attack. The melancholy _tic-tac_ recommenced; Don Rosendo at the
end of some time raised his sword, whereupon Villar instantly far
exceeded his foe in the really supernatural bound he made backward.
The seconds looked at each other in increased surprise, for they thought
he would leap out of the field.
The duel lasted in this way more than half an hour, during which Don
Rosendo once cried:
"Stop!"
"What is it?" asked the seconds, approaching.
"It seems to me that the other gentleman has blunted the point of his
sword."
Then Villar's sword was inspected, and it was seen that it was not so.
This act of generosity, more befitting the Middle Ages than our own
times, raised him, when it became known, in the public estimation to the
dignity of the legendary heroes--Roland, Bayard, and Bernardo del
Carpio. The duel ended when Villar's sword quite unintentionally struck
Belinchon's brow. It was a simple scratch, but the seconds considered it
terminated the fight. Don Rufo stuck a large piece of English
sticking-plaster on the wound. The wounded man nobly gave his hand to
his adversary and despatched a telegram to Lancia to be sent to Sarrio.
Then they all breakfasted cheerfully together; and during the meal the
champions expansively confided to each other the blows they had intended
to administer, and which for lack of opportunity they had been powerless
to give.
"Why, man, if you had not prevented it in time I should have cut your
head in two. With one or two feints at the face I should have given a
thrust at your chest and a cut at your head," said Don Rosendo,
swallowing a large mouthful of cod.
"Well, you would not have come off any better if I had carried out my
intended line of attack," returned Villar. "I should have raised my arm,
ping! I should have made a feint at your head, ping! You were to aim at
my arm, ping! I to give you a cut at your face, ping! You to go for my
head, ping! I to parry and make for your arm, ping!"
Here the editor of "The Future" of Lancia, who had been brandishing his
fork and trying to swallow a fish-bone during the description of his
proposed famous and complicated plan of action, now nearly choked and
turned crimson. He had to be taken into the air, and Don Rosendo was the
one to give him the sacred slaps upon his back to make him get rid of
the fish-bone. Beautiful and striking example of chivalry that can never
be forgotten!
The breakfast over, Don Rosendo and his companions entered the carriage,
and repaired to Sarrio. More than half the population, apprised by the
telegram, awaited them on the outskirts of the town.
A cry of delight and enthusiasm burst from all throats on the approach
of the carriage. Don Rosendo, much moved, put his head out of the window
and took off his hat, which revealed the piece of English
sticking-plaster. At the sight the people gave vent to a loud hurrah,
and the vehicle was fairly mobbed by the crowd. After entering his
house the acclamations were so great that the founder of "The Light" was
obliged to appear at the window, where he was greeted with fresh
enthusiasm.
That night his friends treated him to a serenade.
END OF VOLUME ONE
* * * * *
The following typographical errors have been corrected by the etext
transcriber:
their three daughetrs=>their three daughters
That discourse was a relevation=>That discourse was a revelation
bottle of Ruede wine=>bottle of Rueda wine
* * * * *
End of Project Gutenberg's The Fourth Estate, vol.1, by Armando Palacio Valdes