(Sambhava Parva continued)
"Vaisampayana said, 'After the death of that deer, king Pandu with his
wives was deeply afflicted and wept bitterly. And he exclaimed, "The
wicked, even if born in virtuous families, deluded by their own passions,
become overwhelmed with misery as the fruit of their own deeds. I have
heard that my father, though begotten by Santanu of virtuous soul, was cut
off while still a youth, only because he had become a slave to his lust.
In the soil of that lustful king, the illustrious Rishi Krishna-Dwaipayana
himself, of truthful speech, begot me. A son though I am of such a being,
with my wicked heart wedded to vice, I am yet leading a wandering life in
the woods in the chase of the deer. Oh, the very gods have forsaken me! I
shall seek salvation now. The great impediments to salvation are the
desire to beget children, and other concerns of the world. I shall now
adopt the Brahmacharya mode of life and follow in the imperishable wake of
my father. I shall certainly bring my passions under complete control by
severe ascetic penances. Forsaking my wives and other relatives and
shaving my head, alone shall I wander over the earth, begging for my
subsistence from each of these trees standing here. Forsaking every object
of affection and aversion, and covering my body with dust, I shall make
the shelter of trees or deserted houses my home. I shall never yield to
influence of sorrow or joy, and I shall regard slander and eulogy in the
same light. I shall not seek benedictions or bows. I shall be at peace
with all, and shall not accept gifts. I shall not mock anybody, nor shall
I knit my brows at any one, but shall be ever cheerful and devoted to the
good of all creatures. I shall not harm any of the four orders of life
gifted with power of locomotion or otherwise, viz., oviparous and
viviparous creatures and worms and vegetables. But on the contrary,
preserve an equality of behaviour towards all, as if they were, my own
children. Once a day shall I beg of five or ten families at the most, and
if I do not succeed in obtaining alms, I shall then go without food. I
shall rather stint myself than beg more than once of the same person. If I
do not obtain anything after completing my round of seven or ten houses,
moved by covetousness, I shall not enlarge my round. Whether I obtain or
fail to obtain alms, I shall be equally unmoved like a great ascetic. One
lopping off an arm of mine with a hatchet, and one smearing another arm
with sandal-paste, shall be regarded by me equally. I shall not wish
prosperity to the one or misery to the other. I shall not be pleased with
life or displeased with death. I shall neither desire to live nor to die.
Washing my heart of all sins, I shall certainly transcend those sacred
rites productive of happiness, that men perform in auspicious moments,
days, and periods. I shall also abstain from all acts of religion and
profit and also those that lead to the gratification of the senses. Freed
from all sins and snares of the world, I shall be like the wind subject to
none. Following the path of fearlessness and bearing myself in this way I
shall at last lay down my life. Destitute of the power of begetting
children, firmly adhering to the line of duty I shall not certainly
deviate therefrom in order to tread in the vile path of the world that is
so full of misery. Whether respected or disrespected in the world that man
who from covetousness casteth on others a begging look, certainly behaveth
like a dog. (Destitute as I am of the power of procreation, I should not
certainly, from desire of offspring, solicit others to give me
children.)"'
"Vaisampayana continued, 'The king, having thus wept in sorrow, with a
sigh looked at his two wives Kunti and Madri, and addressing them said,
"Let the princess of Kosala (my mother), Vidura, the king with our friends,
the venerable Satyavati, Bhishma, the priests of our family, illustrious
Soma-drinking Brahmanas of rigid vows and all elderly citizens depending
on us be informed, after being prepared for it, that Pandu hath retired
into the woods to lead a life of asceticism." Hearing these words of their
lord who had set his heart on a life of asceticism in the woods, both
Kunti and Madri addressed him in these proper words, "O bull of Bharata's
race, there are many other modes of life which thou canst adopt and in
which thou canst undergo the severest penances along with us, thy wedded
wives--in which for the salvation of thy body (freedom from re-birth),
thou mayest obtain heaven. We also, in the company of our lord, and for
his benefit, controlling our passions and bidding adieu to all luxuries,
shall subject ourselves to the severest austerities. O king, O thou of
great wisdom, if thou abandonest us, we shall then this very day truly
depart from this world."
"'Pandu replied, "If, indeed, this your resolve springeth from virtue, then
with you both I shall follow the imperishable path of my fathers.
Abandoning the luxuries of cities and towns, clad in barks of trees, and
living on fruits and roots, I shall wander in deep woods, practising the
severest penances. Bathing morning and evening, I shall perform the homa.
I shall reduce my body by eating very sparingly and shall wear rags and
skins and knotted locks on my head. Exposing myself to heat and cold and
disregarding hunger and thirst, I shall reduce my body by severe ascetic
penances. I shall live in solitude and I shall give myself up to
contemplation; I shall eat fruit, ripe or green, that I may find. I shall
offer oblations to the Pitris (manes) and the gods with speech, water and
the fruits of the wilderness. I shall not see, far less harm, any of the
denizens of the woods, or any of my relatives, or any of the residents of
cities and towns. Until I lay down this body, I shall thus practise the
severe ordinances of the Vanaprastha scriptures, always searching for
severer ones that they may contain."'
"Vaisampayana continued, 'The Kuru king, having said this unto his wives,
gave away to Brahmanas the big jewel in his diadem, his necklace of
precious gold, his bracelets, his large ear-rings, his valuable robes and
all the ornaments of his wives. Then summoning his attendants, he
commended them, saying, "Return ye to Hastinapura and proclaim unto all
that Pandu with his wives hath gone into the woods, foregoing wealth,
desire, happiness, and even sexual appetite." Then those followers and
attendants, hearing these and other soft words of the king, set up a loud
wail, uttering, "Oh, we are undone!" Then with hot tears trickling down
their cheeks they left the monarch and returned to Hastinapura with speed
carrying that wealth with them (that was to be distributed in charity).
Then Dhritarashtra, that first of men, hearing from them everything that
had happened in the woods, wept for his brother. He brooded over his
affliction continually, little relishing the comfort of beds and seats and
dishes.
"'Meanwhile, the Kuru prince Pandu (after sending away his attendants)
accompanied by his two wives and eating fruits and roots went to the
mountains of Nagasata. He next went to Chaitraratha, and then crossed the
Kalakuta, and finally, crossing the Himavat, he arrived at Gandhamadana.
Protected by Mahabhutas, Siddhas, and great Rishis, Pandu lived, O king,
sometimes on level ground and sometimes on mountain slopes. He then
journeyed on to the lake of Indradyumna, whence crossing the mountains of
Hansakuta, he went to the mountain of hundred peaks (Sata-sringa) and
there continued to practise ascetic austerities.'"