(_After seeing Ibsen's Dramas._)
There was a young female in Norway,
Who fancied herself in a poor way,
Because she felt that
Her sweet sex was squeezed flat,
As though caught in cold Destiny's doorway.
This rebellious young woman of Norway
Cried, "Man, in his coarse, brutal boor-way,
Would wipe his big feet
On my sex soft and sweet;
But _I_'ll be no mere mat in Man's doorway!"
And so this young woman of Norway
Got IBSEN to write, in cock-sure way,
Concerning her woes,
And tip-tilted her nose,
Crying, "_Now_ womankind will have more way!"
But alas! this young woman of Norway
_Still_ feels that her soul's in a poor way,
Because, in a play,
She won't charm (so they say)
Or draw crowds through the theatre's doorway.
* * * * *
LATEST A PROPOS OF THE COVENT GARDEN FANCY DRESS BALLS.--"Of course,"
observed Mrs. R., "as ladies do not want to be recognised, they simply go
in dummy noses."
* * * * *
LEGAL QUERY.--When a leading Barrister gets someone to "devil" for him, may
the latter's occupation be correctly described as "devilry"?
* * * * *
[Illustration: "IL Y EN A TOUJOURS UN QUI AIME--ET L'AUTRE QUI TEND LA
JOUE."
_He._ "AH! YOU'D THINK A PRECIOUS LOT MORE OF ME, MATILDA, IF I WAS ONLY
SIX FEET HIGH!"
_She._ "YES, DEAREST! BUT THEN YOU WOULDN'T THINK SUCH A PRECIOUS LOT OF
_ME_!"]
* * * * *
AN ORLEANS PLUM.--Prince HENRI D'ORLEANS (says the _Times_) has just been
rebuking the British people for the Chauvinism of their Oriental policy.
Like the late M. MASSIE, whose shade he invokes, the young Prince seems to
object to us, not because we commit any specific acts of hostility, but
"because we look on in a most aggravating fashion." This is truly funny!
One country may steal a--Tonkin, but another may not look over a boundary!
Prince HENRY presents a peculiarly close parallel to KEENE'S infuriated
(and incoherent) Paterfamilias, who angrily commanded his silent son "not
to look at him in _that_ tone of voice!"
* * * * *
OPERA AND DISESTABLISHMENT.--_La Damnation de Faust_ was produced most
successfully at the Theatre at Monte Carlo. According to some stern
moralists, who regard the Principality as a gambling-hell upon earth, this
particular Opera was in a quite congenial atmosphere. Odd that in the two
Principalities, Monte Carlo and Wales, the objects for Disestablishment
should be so diametrically opposite. In Wales it is the particular Church,
and at Monte Carlo it is the not-at-all-particular t'other word,
unmentionable twice in the same paragraph to ears polite.
* * * * *
NEW READING.--(_By a Musical Lady Latinist._)--"Amor et melle et KELLIE est
fecundissimus."
* * * * *