"No, dear, not--now," catching his breath. "I have been in pain and it
has worn upon me. Greyson gave me something to carry with me some time
ago, I have taken it three times to-day and now I shall go to sleep?"
"Are you _sure_ you feel better?" she asked caressing the hand that he
held out to her. "Let me stay and do something for you."
"No. I must go to sleep. Run along. I have sent your mother away, and
now I send you away."
She lingered a moment, stooping to kiss the bald forehead and then the
plump hand.
Her father was very happy to-night, for her mother, of her own accord,
for the first time in fifteen years, had kissed him.
He held Tessa's hand thinking that he would tell her, then he decided
that the thought of those fifteen years would hurt her too sorely.
"I thought that you meant to tell me something," she said.
"No; run along."
Along the planks, along the pavement, across the Park, she walked
slowly, in the summer starlight, with the letters in her hand.
"Star light! Star bright!
I wish I may, I wish I might,
See somebody I want to see to-night."
A child's voice was chanting the words in a dreamy recitative.
"Dear child," sighed Tessa, with her five and twenty years tugging at
her heart.
She longed for a sight of Miss Jewett's untroubled face to-night; if she
might only tell her about the right thing that she had tried to do and
how the power to do it had been taken from her!
But no one could comfort her concerning it; not her father, not Miss
Jewett, not Ralph Towne, not Gus Hammerton, not Felix!
One glance up into the sky over the trees in the Park helped her more
than any human comforting. It was a new experience to have outgrown
human comforting; she thought that she had outgrown it that day--the last
day of the year; still she must see Miss Jewett; it would be a rest to
hear some one talk who did not know about Felix or that other time that
the sunshiny eyes had brought to life again. Would they meet as
heretofore? Must they meet socially upon the street or at church?
If it might have been that he might remain away for years and
years--until she had wholly forgotten or did not care!
Miss Jewett was almost alone; there was no one with her but Sue Greyson
tossing over neckties to find a white one with fringe.
Through the silks there shone on the first finger of Sue's left hand the
sparkle of a diamond; she colored and smiled, then laughed and held her
finger up for Tessa's inspection.
"Guess who gave it to me," she said defiantly.
It could not be Dr. Lake--Tessa would not speak his name; it must be her
father--but no, Sue would not blush as she was blushing now; it could not
be Mr. Gesner! Tessa's heart quickened, she was angry with herself for
thinking of Mr. Gesner. Mr. Towne! But that was not possible.
"Can't you guess?" Sue was enjoying her confusion.
"No. I can't guess."
"Say the Man in the Moon. I as much expected it. It's from Stacey! I
knew you would be confounded. Wasn't I sly about it? We are to be
married the first day of October. We settled on that because it is
Stacey's birthday! It is Dr. Lake's too. Isn't it comical. Stacey is
twenty-three and the doctor is twenty-nine! Stacey is a year younger
than I. I wish that he wasn't. I think that I shall change my age in the
Bible. When I told Dr. Lake, he said that I seemed inclined to change
some other things in the Bible. Don't you tell, either of you. It's a
profound secret. Wasn't father hopping, though? But I told him that I
would elope if he didn't consent like a good papa; and now since
Stacey's salary is raised he hasn't a bit of an excuse for being ugly
about it. I am going to have all the new furniture, too; I bargained for
that. Won't it be queer for me to live so far away? Stacey is in a lace
house in Philadelphia, don't you remember? You ought to see the white
lace sacque that he brought me for an engagement present; it's too
lovely for any thing. Why, Tessa, you look stunned, are you speechless?
Don't you relish the idea of my being married before you? You ought to
have seen Dr. Lake when I showed my ring to him! He turned as white as a
sheet and trembled so that he had to sit down; all he said was, 'May God
forgive you.' Don't you think that it was wicked in him to say that? I
told him that it sounded like swearing. Yes, I'll take this one, please.
And, oh, Tessa, I want you to help me to buy things. I am to have a
dozen of every thing. I shall be married in white silk; I told father
that he would never have another daughter married so that he might as
well open his long purse. We shall go to the White Mountains on our
wedding tour. It's late in the season, of course, but I always wanted to
go to the White Mountains and I will if we are both frozen to death. I
know that you are angry with me, but I can't help it. You are just the
one to believe in love. I have always liked Stacey; he has just
beautiful hands, and his manners are really touching. You ought to see
him lift his hat; Mr. Towne is nowhere."
"What will your father do?" asked Miss Jewett.
"Oh, Aunt Jane must come back, she hasn't captivated the widower yet; or
he might get married himself. I think that I'll suggest it. _Wouldn't_
it be fun to have a double wedding? I'll let father be married first;
Stacey and I will stand up with them."
Sue went off into a long, loud peal of laughter; Miss Jewett smiled;
Tessa spoke gravely: "Sue, your mother would not like to hear that."
"Oh, bother! She doesn't think of me. I want some silks, too, please. I
shall have to make Stacey a pair of slippers and a lot of other pretty
things. And oh, Tessa, I haven't told you the news! The queerest thing!
Dr. Towne--we must call him that now--has bought that handsome brick house
opposite the Park and is going into practice. Dr. Lake says that of
course people will run after _him_ while they would let him starve!"
"Then he'll smell of medicine, too," Tessa could not forbear suggesting.
"Yes, and have bottles in all his pockets. I'm going to see your mother;
she cares more about dress than you and Dine put together. If your
father should die, she would be married before either of you. I won't
come if you look so cross at me."
At that moment Mr. Hammerton pushed open the door; he had come for
gloves and handkerchiefs. Tessa selected them for him and would then
have waited for her word with Miss Jewett, had not one of the clerks
returned from supper.
"Come, Lady Blue, I am going your way."
"Father is not well to-night; he will not play chess."
"I am going all the same, however; you shall play with me, and Dine
shall read the 'Nut Brown Maid.'"
As they were crossing the Park, they met Dr. Lake; he was walking
hurriedly; she could not see his face.
"What do you think Lake said to me last night? We were talking--rather,
he was--about trouble. He has seen a good deal of it one time and another
I imagine; his nerves are so raw that every thing hurts. For want of
something to suit him in my own experience, I quoted a thought of
Charles Kingsley's. He turned upon me as if I had struck him--'A man in a
book said that.' A man in a book _did_ say it, so I had nothing to say.
Something is troubling you, what is it?"
"More than one something is troubling me. I just heard a bit of news."
"Not good news?"
"I can not see any good."
He repeated in a hurried tone:
"'Good tidings every day;
God's messengers ride fast.
We do not hear one half they say,
There is such noise on the highway
Where we must wait while they ride past.'"
"Perhaps I do not hear one half they say this time; the half I do hear
is troublesome enough. Some day, when I may begin 'five and fifty years
ago,' I will tell you a story."
"Will it take so long for me to become worthy to hear it?"
"I wish I _might_ tell you; you always help me," she said impulsively.
"Is there a hindrance?"
"It is too near to be spoken of."
She was not in the mood for chess, but her father brightened at Mr.
Hammerton's entrance, arose, threw off the shawl, and came to the table,
saying that he would watch her moves. He seated himself close to her,
with an arm across the back of her chair, once or twice bringing his
head down to the chestnut braids.
"How alike you are!" exclaimed Mr. Hammerton.
"Yes, I am very pretty," replied Mr. Wadsworth, seriously.
Mrs. Wadsworth had taken her work over to Mrs. Bird for a consultation
thereupon; Dine fell asleep, resting her curly head on the book that Mr.
Hammerton had brought her.
When Mr. Hammerton arose, Mr. Wadsworth went to the door with him to
look out into the night; Tessa said good night and went up-stairs; the
sleepy head upon the book did not stir.
"I never can find a constellation," remarked Mr. Wadsworth. "Tessa is
always laughing at me."
"Step out and see if I can help you."
They moved to the end of the piazza leaving the door wide open; the
sleepy brown eyes opened with a start--was she listening to words that
she should not hear?
Mr. Hammerton had surely said "Dinah." And now her father was saying--was
she dreaming still?--"Take her, and God bless you both. I have nothing
better to hope for my darling. She will make you a good wife."
"Let it remain a secret I want her to love me without any urging. She
must love me because I am necessary to her and not merely because I love
her."
Could Tessa have heard his voice, she would never again have accused him
of coldness.
"I shall have to wait--I expect an increase of salary. I am not sure that
she thinks of me otherwise than as a grown-up brother--but I will bide my
time. I know this--at least I think I do--that she does not care for any
one else."
"I am sure of that," said her father's voice. "You do not know how you
have taken a burden from me, my son! I have _hoped_ for this." Startled
little Dinah arose and fled.
She would never tell, no, not even Tessa; but how could she behave
towards him as if she did not know?
"Tessa, did you ever have a secret to keep?"
"Yes. Laura told me once that she had a gold dollar and I've never told
until this minute."
"But this is a wonderful, beautiful, happy secret; the wonderfulest and
beautifulest thing in the world. And I shall never, never tell. You will
never know until you discover it yourself."
"I want to know something to be glad of."
"You will be glad of this. As glad as glad can be. It is rather funny
that neither of us ever guessed; and you are quick to see things, too."
"Perhaps I _do_ know, pretty sister."
"No, you don't. I should have seen in your manner. Perhaps I dreamed it;
or perhaps an angel came and told me. It is good enough for an angel to
tell."
"'Good tidings every day,
God's messengers ride fast.'"
repeated Tessa.
"Tessa," with her face turned away, "do you like Gus very much?"
"Do I like _you_ very much? I should just as soon think of your asking
me that."
"Better than Felix or Mr. Towne or Dr. Lake, or any of the ten thousand
young men in Dunellen?"
"Why, Dine, what ails you? Are you asking my advice? He hasn't been
making love to my little sister, has he?"
"No," said Dinah, "I wonder if he knows how. Daisy Grey's father is
dead. There will have to be a new Greek professor at the Seminary. She
liked her father."