WOMEN AND WIVES.

_Parva leves capiunt animos_.--

OVID, _Ars Am._, i. 159.

Light minds are pleased with trifles.

When I was in France, I used to gaze with great astonishment at the

splendid equipages, and party-coloured habits of that fantastic nation. I

was one day in particular contemplating a lady that sat in a coach

adorned with gilded Cupids, and finely painted with the Loves of Venus

and Adonis. The coach was drawn by six milk-white horses, and loaden

behind with the same number of powdered footmen. Just before the lady

were a couple of beautiful pages, that were stuck among the harness, and,

by their gay dresses and smiling features, looked like the elder brothers

of the little boys that were carved and painted in every corner of the

coach.

The lady was the unfortunate Cleanthe, who afterwards gave an occasion to

a pretty melancholy novel. She had for several years received the

addresses of a gentleman, whom, after a long and intimate acquaintance,

she forsook upon the account of this shining equipage, which had been

offered to her by one of great riches but a crazy constitution. The

circumstances in which I saw her were, it seems, the disguises only of a

broken heart, and a kind of pageantry to cover distress, for in two

months after, she was carried to her grave with the same pomp and

magnificence, being sent thither partly by the loss of one lover and

partly by the possession of another.

I have often reflected with myself on this unaccountable humour in

womankind, of being smitten with everything that is showy and

superficial; and on the numberless evils that befall the sex from this

light fantastical disposition. I myself remember a young lady that was

very warmly solicited by a couple of importunate rivals, who, for several

months together, did all they could to recommend themselves, by

complacency of behaviour and agreeableness of conversation. At length,

when the competition was doubtful, and the lady undetermined in her

choice, one of the young lovers very luckily bethought himself of adding

a supernumerary lace to his liveries, which had so good an effect that he

married her the very week after.

The usual conversation of ordinary women very much cherishes this natural

weakness of being taken with outside and appearance. Talk of a

new-married couple, and you immediately hear whether they keep their

coach and six, or eat in plate. Mention the name of an absent lady, and

it is ten to one but you learn something of her gown and petticoat. A

ball is a great help to discourse, and a birthday furnishes conversation

for a twelvemonth after. A furbelow of precious stones, a hat buttoned

with a diamond, a brocade waistcoat or petticoat, are standing topics. In

short, they consider only the drapery of the species, and never cast away

a thought on those ornaments of the mind that make persons illustrious in

themselves and useful to others. When women are thus perpetually

dazzling one another's imaginations, and filling their heads with nothing

but colours, it is no wonder that they are more attentive to the

superficial parts of life than the solid and substantial blessings of it.

A girl who has been trained up in this kind of conversation is in danger

of every embroidered coat that comes in her way. A pair of fringed

gloves may be her ruin. In a word, lace and ribands, silver and gold

galloons, with the like glittering gewgaws, are so many lures to women of

weak minds or low educations, and, when artificially displayed, are able

to fetch down the most airy coquette from the wildest of her flights and

rambles.

True happiness is of a retired nature, and an enemy to pomp and noise; it

arises, in the first place, from the enjoyment of one's self, and, in the

next, from the friendship and conversation of a few select companions; it

loves shade and solitude, and naturally haunts groves and fountains,

fields and meadows; in short, it feels everything it wants within itself,

and receives no addition from multitudes of witnesses and spectators. On

the contrary, false happiness loves to be in a crowd, and to draw the

eyes of the world upon her. She does not receive any satisfaction from

the applauses which she gives herself, but from the admiration she raises

in others. She flourishes in courts and palaces, theatres and

assemblies, and has no existence but when she is looked upon.

Aurelia, though a woman of great quality, delights in the privacy of a

country life, and passes away a great part of her time in her own walks

and gardens. Her husband, who is her bosom friend and companion in her

solitudes, has been in love with her ever since he knew her. They both

abound with good sense, consummate virtue, and a mutual esteem; and are a

perpetual entertainment to one another. Their family is under so regular

an economy, in its hours of devotion and repast, employment and

diversion, that it looks like a little commonwealth within itself. They

often go into company, that they may return with the greater delight to

one another; and sometimes live in town, not to enjoy it so properly as

to grow weary of it, that they may renew in themselves the relish of a

country life. By this means they are happy in each other, beloved by

their children, adored by their servants, and are become the envy, or

rather the delight, of all that know them.

How different to this is the life of Fulvia! She considers her husband

as her steward, and looks upon discretion and good housewifery as little

domestic virtues unbecoming a woman of quality. She thinks life lost in

her own family, and fancies herself out of the world when she is not in

the ring, the playhouse, or the drawing-room. She lives in a perpetual

motion of body and restlessness of thought, and is never easy in any one

place when she thinks there is more company in another. The missing of

an opera the first night would be more afflicting to her than the death

of a child. She pities all the valuable part of her own sex, and calls

every woman of a prudent, modest, retired life, a poor-spirited,

unpolished creature. What a mortification would it be to Fulvia, if she

knew that her setting herself to view is but exposing herself, and that

she grows contemptible by being conspicuous!

I cannot conclude my paper without observing that Virgil has very finely

touched upon this female passion for dress and show, in the character of

Camilla, who, though she seems to have shaken off all the other

weaknesses of her sex, is still described as a woman in this particular.

The poet tells us, that after having made a great slaughter of the enemy,

she unfortunately cast her eye on a Trojan, who wore an embroidered

tunic, a beautiful coat of mail, with a mantle of the finest purple. "A

golden bow," says he, "hung upon his shoulder; his garment was buckled

with a golden clasp, and his head covered with a helmet of the same

shining metal." The Amazon immediately singled out this well-dressed

warrior, being seized with a woman's longing for the pretty trappings

that he was adorned with:

--_Totumque incauta per agmen_,

_Faemineo praedae et spoliorum ardebat amore_.

_AEn._, xi. 781.

--So greedy was she bent

On golden spoils, and on her prey intent.

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