CAUDLE AND CHRISTENING CUPS AND CEREMONIES.
We are asked by many young mammas as to the meaning of the phrase
"caudle parties."
Formerly the persons who called to congratulate the happy
possessor of a new boy or girl were offered mulled wine and
plum-cake. Some early chronicler thinks that the two got mixed,
and that caudle was the result.
Certain it is that a most delicious beverage, a kind of oatmeal
gruel, boiled "two days," with raisins and spices, and fine old
Madeira (some say rum) added, makes a dish fit to set before a
king, and is offered now to the callers on a young mamma. The old
English custom was to have this beverage served three days after
the arrival of the little stranger. The caudle-cups, preserved in
many an old family, are now eagerly sought after as curiosities;
they have two handles, so they could be passed from one to
another. They were handed down as heirlooms when these candle
parties were more fashionable than they have been, until a recent
date. Now there is a decided idea of reintroducing them. In those
days the newly-made papa also entertained his friends with a stag
party, when bachelors and also Benedicks were invited to eat
buttered toast, which was sugared and spread in a mighty
punch-bowl, over which boiling-hot beer was poured. After the
punch-bowl was emptied, each guest placed a piece of money in the
bowl for the nurse. Strong ale was brewed, and a pipe of wine laid
by to be drunk on the majority of the child.
This greasy mess is fortunately now extinct, but the caudle, a
really delicious dish or drink, is the fashion again. It is
generally offered when master or miss is about six weeks old, and
mamma receives her friends in a tea gown or some pretty
convalescent wrap, very often made of velvet or plush cut in the
form of a belted-in jacket and skirt, or in one long princesse
robe, elaborately trimmed with cascades of lace down the front.
The baby is, of course, shown, but not much handled. Some parents
have the christening and the caudle party together, but of this,
it is said, the Church does not approve.
The selection of god-parents is always a delicate task. It is a
very great compliment, of course, to ask any one to stand in this
relation, highly regarded in England, but not so much thought of
here. Formerly there were always two godfathers and two
godmothers, generally chosen from friends and relations, who were
expected to watch over the religious education of the young child,
and to see that he was, in due time, confirmed. In all old
countries this relationship lasts through life; kindly help and
counsel being given to the child by the godfather--even to
adoption in many instances--should the parents die. But in our new
country, with the absence of an established Church, and with our
belief in the power of every man to take care of himself, this
beautiful relationship has been neglected. We are glad to see by
our letters that it is being renewed, and that people are thinking
more of these time-honored connections.
After a birth, friends and acquaintances should call and send in
their cards, or send them by their servants, with kind inquiries.
When the mother is ready to see her friends, she should, if she
wishes, signify that time by sending out cards for a "caudle
party." But let her be rather deliberate about this unless she has
a mother, or aunt, or sister to take all the trouble for her.
The godfather and godmother generally give some little present; a
silver cup or porringer, knife, fork, and spoon, silver basin,
coral tooth-cutter, or coral and bells, were the former gifts;
but, nowadays, we hear of one wealthy godfather who left a check
for $100,000 in the baby's cradle; and it is not unusual for those
who can do so to make some very valuable investment for the child,
particularly if he bears the name of the godfather.
Some people--indeed, most people--take their children to church to
be baptized, and then give a luncheon at home afterwards to which
all are invited, especially the officiating clergyman and his
wife, as well as the sponsors. The presents should be given at
this time. Old-fashioned people give the baby some salt and an egg
for good luck, and are particular that he should be carried
up-stairs before he is carried down, and that when he goes out
first he shall be carried to the house of some near and dear
relative.
Confirmation is in the Episcopal Church the sequel to baptism; and
in France this is a beautiful and very important ceremony. In the
month of May the streets are filled with white doves--young girls,
all in muslin and lace veils, going with their mothers or
chaperons to be confirmed. Here the duty of the godfather or the
godmother comes in; and if a child is an orphan, or has careless
or irreligious parents, the Church holds the godparent responsible
that these children be brought to the bishop to be confirmed.
Notices of confirmation to be held are always given out in the
various churches some weeks prior to the event; and persons
desirous of being admitted to the rite are requested to make known
their wish and to give their names to their clergyman. Classes are
formed, and instruction and preparation given during the weeks
preceding the day which the bishop has appointed. In England a
noble English lady is as much concerned for her goddaughter
through all this important period as she is for her daughter. In
France the obligation is also considered sacred. We have known of
a lady who made the journey from Montpellier to Paris--although
she could scarcely afford the expense--to attend the confirmation
of her goddaughter, although the young girl had a father and
mother.
It is a ceremony well worth seeing, either in England or France.
The girls walk in long processions through the streets; the dress
uniformly of white with long veils. Youths follow in black suits,
black ties, and gloves; they enter one aisle of the church, the
girls the other. When the time arrives for the laying on of hands,
the girls go first, two and two; they give their card or
certificate into the hands of the bishop's chaplain, who stands
near to receive them. The candidates kneel before the bishop, who
lays his hands severally on their heads.
Of course persons not belonging to the Episcopal Church do not
observe this rite. But as a belief in baptism is almost universal,
there is no reason why the godfather and godmother should not be
chosen and adhered to. We always name our children, or we are apt
to, for some dear friend; and we would all gladly believe that
such a friendship, begun at the altar when he is being consecrated
to a Christian life, may go with him and be a help to the dear
little man. In our belligerent independence and our freedom from
creeds and cant we have thrown away too much, and can afford to
reassert our belief in and respect for a few old customs.
Royalty has always been a respecter of these powers. King Edward
VI. and his sisters were each baptized when only three days old,
and the ceremony, which lasted between two and three days, took
place at night, by torch-light. The child was carried under a
canopy, preceded by gentlemen bearing in state the sponsors'
gifts, and attended by a flourish of trumpets.
At a modern caudle party the invitations are sent out a week in
advance, and read thus:
_"Mr. and Mrs. Brown request the pleasure of your company on
Tuesday afternoon, at three o'clock. 18 West Kent Street. Caudle.
'No presents are expected.'_"
For the honor of being a godfather one receives a note in the
first person, asking the friend to assume that kindly office, and
also mentioning the fact that the name will be so and so. If the
baby is named for the godfather, a very handsome present is
usually made; if not, the godfather or godmother still sends some
little token of regard. This, however, is entirely a matter of
fancy. No one is obliged to give a present, of course.
The baby at his christening is shown off in a splendid robe, very
much belaced and embroidered, and it is to be feared that it is a
day of disturbance for him. Babies should not be too much excited;
a quiet and humdrum existence, a not too showy nurse, and regular
hours are conducive to a good constitution for these delicate
visitors. The gay dresses and jingling ornaments of the Roman
nurses are now denounced by the foreign doctors as being too
exciting to the little eyes that are looking out on a new world.
They are very pretty and picturesque, and many a travelling mamma
goes into a large outlay for these bright colors and for the
peasant jewelry. The practice of making a child ride backward in a
push-wagon is also sternly denounced by modern physicians.
Fashionable mammas who give caudle parties should remember that in
our harsh climate maternity is beset by much feebleness as to
nerves in both mother and child; therefore a long seclusion in the
nursery is advised before the dangerous period of entertaining
one's friends begins. Let the caudle party wait, and the
christening be done quietly in one's own bedroom, if the infant is
feeble. Show off the young stranger at a later date: an ounce of
prevention is worth a pound of cure.