CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

DINE WITH THE PUBLISHER--RELIGIONS--NO ANIMAL FOOD--UNPROFITABLE

DISCUSSIONS--PRINCIPLES OF CRITICISM--THE BOOK MARKET--NEWGATE

LIVES--GOETHE--GERMAN ACQUIREMENTS--MORAL DIGNITY

On the Sunday I was punctual to my appointment to dine with the

publisher. As I hurried along the square in which his house stood, my

thoughts were fixed so intently on the great man, that I passed by him

without seeing him. He had observed me, however, and joined me just as I

was about to knock at the door. 'Let us take a turn in the square,' said

he, 'we shall not dine for half an hour.'

'Well,' said he, as we were walking in the square, 'what have you been

doing since I last saw you?'

'I have been looking about London,' said I, 'and I have bought the

_Dairyman's Daughter_; here it is.'

'Pray put it up,' said the publisher; 'I don't want to look at such

trash. Well, do you think you could write anything like it?'

'I do not,' said I.

'How is that?' said the publisher, looking at me.

'Because,' said I, 'the man who wrote it seems to be perfectly well

acquainted with his subject; and, moreover, to write from the heart.'

'By the subject you mean--'

'Religion.'

'And ain't you acquainted with religion?'

'Very little.'

'I am sorry for that,' said the publisher seriously, 'for he who sets up

for an author ought to be acquainted not only with religion, but

religions, and indeed with all subjects, like my good friend in the

country. It is well that I have changed my mind about the _Dairyman's

Daughter_, or I really don't know whom I could apply to on the subject at

the present moment, unless to himself; and after all I question whether

his style is exactly suited for an evangelical novel.'

'Then you do not wish for an imitation of the _Dairyman's Daughter_?'

'I do not, sir; I have changed my mind, as I told you before; I wish to

employ you in another line, but will communicate to you my intentions

after dinner.'

At dinner, beside the publisher and myself, were present his wife and son

with his newly-married bride; the wife appeared a quiet respectable

woman, and the young people looked very happy and good-natured; not so

the publisher, who occasionally eyed both with contempt and dislike.

Connected with this dinner there was one thing remarkable; the publisher

took no animal food, but contented himself with feeding voraciously on

rice and vegetables prepared in various ways.

'You eat no animal food, sir?' said I.

'I do not, sir,' said he; 'I have forsworn it upwards of twenty years.

In one respect, sir, I am a Brahmin. I abhor taking away life--the

brutes have as much right to live as ourselves.'

'But,' said I, 'if the brutes were not killed, there would be such a

superabundance of them that the land would be overrun with them.'

'I do not think so, sir; few are killed in India, and yet there is plenty

of room.'

'But,' said I, 'Nature intended that they should be destroyed, and the

brutes themselves prey upon one another, and it is well for themselves

and the world that they do so. What would be the state of things if

every insect, bird, and worm were left to perish of old age?'

'We will change the subject,' said the publisher; 'I have never been a

friend of unprofitable discussions.'

I looked at the publisher with some surprise, I had not been accustomed

to be spoken to so magisterially; his countenance was dressed in a

portentous frown, and his eye looked more sinister than ever; at that

moment he put me in mind of some of those despots of whom I had read in

the history of Morocco, whose word was law. He merely wants power,

thought I to myself, to be a regular Muley Mehemet; and then I sighed,

for I remembered how very much I was in the power of that man.

The dinner over, the publisher nodded to his wife, who departed, followed

by her daughter-in-law. The son looked as if he would willingly have

attended them; he, however, remained seated; and, a small decanter of

wine being placed on the table, the publisher filled two glasses, one of

which he handed to myself, and the other to his son; saying, 'Suppose you

two drink to the success of the Review. I would join you,' said he,

addressing himself to me, 'but I drink no wine; if I am a Brahmin with

respect to meat, I am a Mahometan with respect to wine.'

So the son and I drank success to the Review, and then the young man

asked me various questions; for example--How I liked London?--Whether I

did not think it a very fine place?--Whether I was at the play the night

before?--and whether I was in the park that afternoon? He seemed

preparing to ask me some more questions; but, receiving a furious look

from his father, he became silent, filled himself a glass of wine, drank

it off, looked at the table for about a minute, then got up, pushed back

his chair, made me a bow, and left the room.

'Is that young gentleman, sir,' said I, 'well versed in the principles of

criticism?'

'He is not, sir,' said the publisher; 'and if I place him at the head of

the Review ostensibly, I do it merely in the hope of procuring him a

maintenance; of the principle of a thing he knows nothing, except that

the principle of bread is wheat, and that the principle of that wine is

grape. Will you take another glass?'

I looked at the decanter; but, not feeling altogether so sure as the

publisher's son with respect to the principle of what it contained, I

declined taking any more.

'No, sir,' said the publisher, adjusting himself in his chair, 'he knows

nothing about criticism, and will have nothing more to do with the

reviewals than carrying about the books to those who have to review them;

the real conductor of the Review will be a widely different person, to

whom I will, when convenient, introduce you. And now we will talk of the

matter which we touched upon before dinner: I told you then that I had

changed my mind with respect to you; I have been considering the state of

the market, sir, the book market, and I have come to the conclusion that,

though you might be profitably employed upon evangelical novels, you

could earn more money for me, sir, and consequently for yourself, by a

compilation of Newgate lives and trials.'

'Newgate lives and trials!'

'Yes, sir,' said the publisher, 'Newgate lives and trials; and now, sir,

I will briefly state to you the services which I expect you to perform,

and the terms which I am willing to grant. I expect you, sir, to compile

six volumes of Newgate lives and trials, each volume to contain by no

manner of means less than one thousand pages; the remuneration which you

will receive when the work is completed will be fifty pounds, which is

likewise intended to cover any expenses you may incur in procuring books,

papers, and manuscripts necessary for the compilation. Such will be one

of your employments, sir,--such the terms. In the second place, you will

be expected to make yourself useful in the Review--generally useful,

sir--doing whatever is required of you; for it is not customary, at least

with me, to permit writers, especially young writers, to choose their

subjects. In these two departments, sir, namely compilation and

reviewing, I had yesterday, after due consideration, determined upon

employing you. I had intended to employ you no farther, sir--at least

for the present; but, sir, this morning I received a letter from my

valued friend in the country, in which he speaks in terms of strong

admiration (I don't overstate) of your German acquirements. Sir, he says

that it would be a thousand pities if your knowledge of the German

language should be lost to the world, or even permitted to sleep, and he

entreats me to think of some plan by which it may be turned to account.

Sir, I am at all times willing, if possible, to oblige my worthy friend,

and likewise to encourage merit and talent; I have, therefore, determined

to employ you in German.'

'Sir,' said I, rubbing my hands, 'you are very kind, and so is our mutual

friend; I shall be happy to make myself useful in German; and if you

think a good translation from Goethe--his _Sorrows_ for example, or more

particularly his _Faust_--'

'Sir,' said the publisher, 'Goethe is a drug; his _Sorrows_ are a drug,

so is his _Faustus_, more especially the last, since that fool ---

rendered him into English. No, sir, I do not want you to translate

Goethe or anything belonging to him; nor do I want you to translate

anything from the German; what I want you to do, is to translate into

German. I am willing to encourage merit, sir; and, as my good friend in

his last letter has spoken very highly of your German acquirements, I

have determined that you shall translate my book of philosophy into

German.'

'Your book of philosophy into German, sir?'

'Yes, sir; my book of philosophy into German. I am not a drug, sir, in

Germany as Goethe is here, no more is my book. I intend to print the

translation at Leipzig, sir; and if it turns out a profitable

speculation, as I make no doubt it will, provided the translation be well

executed, I will make you some remuneration. Sir, your remuneration will

be determined by the success of your translation.'

'But, sir--'

'Sir,' said the publisher, interrupting me, 'you have heard my

intentions; I consider that you ought to feel yourself highly gratified

by my intentions towards you; it is not frequently that I deal with a

writer, especially a young writer, as I have done with you. And now,

sir, permit me to inform you that I wish to be alone. This is Sunday

afternoon, sir; I never go to church, but I am in the habit of spending

part of every Sunday afternoon alone--profitably I hope, sir--in musing

on the magnificence of nature and the moral dignity of man.'

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