Spring ploughing had been proceeding for some time now, but Athalie
did not feel equal to walking cross-lots over ploughed ground, so she
let Clive go alone on tours of inspection.
But these absences were brief; he did not care to remain away from
Athalie for more than an hour at a time. So, T. Phelan ploughed on,
practically unmolested and untormented by questions, suggestions, and
advice. Which liberty was to his liking. And he loafed much.
In these latter days of May Athalie spent a great deal of her time
among her cushions and wraps on the garden seat near the fountain. On
his return from prowling about the farm Clive was sure to find her
there, reading or sewing, or curled up among her cushions in the sun
with Hafiz purring on her lap.
And she would look up at Clive out of sleepy, humorous eyes in which
glimmered a smile of greeting, or she would pretend surprise and
disapproval at his long absence of half an hour with: "Well, C.
Bailey, Junior! Where do _you_ come from now?"
The phases of awakening spring in the garden seemed to be an endless
source of pleasure to the girl; she would sit for hours looking at the
pale lilac-tinted wistaria clusters hanging over the naked wall and
watching plundering bumble-bees scrambling from blossom to blossom.
And when at the base of the wall, the spiked buds of silvery-grey iris
unfolded, and their delicate fragrance filled the air, the exquisite
mingling of the two odours and the two shades of mauve thrilled her as
no perfume, no colour had ever affected her.
The little colonies of lily-of-the-valley came into delicate bloom
under the fringing shrubbery; golden bell flower, pink and vermilion
cydonia, roses, all bloomed and had their day; lilac bushes were
weighted with their heavy, dewy clusters; the sweet-brier's green
tracery grew into tender leaf and its matchless perfume became
apparent when the sun fell hot.
In the warm air there seemed to brood the exquisite hesitation of
happy suspense,--a delicious and breathless sense of waiting for
something still more wonderful to come.
And when Athalie felt it stealing over her she looked at Clive and
knew that he also felt it. Then her slim hand would steal into his and
nestle there, content, fearless, blissfully confident of what was to
be.
But it was subtly otherwise with Clive. Once or twice she felt his
hand tremble slightly as though a slight shiver had passed over him;
and when again she noticed it she asked him why.
"Nothing," he said in a strained voice; "I am very, very happy."
"I know it.... There is no fear mingling with your happiness; is
there, Clive?"
But before he replied she knew that it was so.
"Dearest," she murmured, "dearest! You must not be afraid for me."
And suddenly the long pent fears strangled him; he could not speak;
and she felt his lips, hot and tremulous against her hand.
"My heart!" she whispered, "all will go well. There is absolutely no
reason for you to be afraid."
"Do you _know_ it?"
"Yes, I _know_ it. I am certain of it, darling. Everything will turn
out as it should.... I can't bear to have the most beautiful moments
of our lives made sad for you by apprehension. Won't you believe me
that all will go well?"
"Yes."
"Then smile at me, Clive."
His under lip was still unsteady as he drew nearer and took her into
his arms.
"God wouldn't do such harm," he said. "He _couldn't_! All must go
well."
She smiled gaily and framed his head with her hands:
"You're just a boy, aren't you, C. Bailey, Junior?--just a big boy,
yet. As though the God we understand--you and I--could deal otherwise
than tenderly with us. _He_ knows how rare love really is. He will not
disturb it. The world needs it for seed."
The smile gradually faded from Clive's face; he shook his head,
slightly:
"If I had known--if I had understood--"
"What, darling?"
"The hazard--the chances you are to take--"
But she laughed deliciously, and sealed his mouth with her fragrant
hand, bidding him hunt for other sources of worry if he really was
bent on scaring himself.
Later she asked him for a calendar, and he brought it, and together
they looked over it where several of the last days of May had been
marked with a pencil.
As she sat beside him, studying the printed sequence of the days, a
smile hovering on her lips, he thought he had never seen her so
beautiful.
A soft wind blew the bright tendrils of her hair across her cheeks;
her skin was like a little girl's, rose and snow, smooth as a child's;
her eyes clearly, darkly blue--the hue and tint called azure--like the
colour of the zenith on some still June day.
And through the glow of her superb and youthful symmetry, ever, it
seemed to him, some inward radiance pulsated, burning in her golden
burnished hair, in scarlet on her lips, making lovely the soft
splendour of her eyes. Hers was the fresh, sweet beauty of ardent
youth and spring incarnate,--neither frail and colourlessly spiritual,
nor tainted with the stain of clay.
* * * * *
Sometimes Athalie lunched there in the garden with him, Hafiz, seated
on the bench beside them, politely observant, condescending to receive
a morsel now and then.
It was on such a day, at noon-tide, that Athalie bent over toward him,
touched his hair with her lips, then whispered something very low.
[Illustration: "Sometimes Athalie lunched there in the garden with
him."]
His face went white, but he smiled and rose,--came back swiftly to
kiss her hands--then entered the house and telephoned to New York.
When he came back to her she was ready to rise, lean on his arm, and
walk leisurely to the house.
On the way she called his attention to a pale blue sheet of
forget-me-nots spreading under the shrubbery. She noticed other new
blossoms in the garden, lingered before the bed of white pansies.
"Like little faces," she said with a faint smile.
One silvery-grey iris he broke from its sheathed stem and gave her;
she moved slowly on with the scented blossom lifted to her lips.
In the hall a starched and immaculate nurse met her with a significant
nod of understanding. And so, between Clive and the trained nurse she
mounted the stairs to her room.
Later Clive came in to sit beside her where she lay on her dainty bed.
She turned her flushed face on the pillow, smiled at him, and lifted
her neck a little; and he slipped one arm under it.
"Such a wonderful pillow your shoulder makes," she murmured.... "I am
thinking of the first time I ever knew it.... So quiet I lay,--such
infinite caution I used whenever I moved.... That night the air was
musical with children's voices--everywhere under the stars--softly
garrulous, laughing, lisping, calling from the hills and meadows....
That night of miracles and of stars--my dear--my dearest!--"
* * * * *
Close to her cheek he breathed: "Are you in pain?"
"Oh, Clive! I am so happy. I love you so--I love you so."
Then nurse and physician came in and the latter took him by the arm
and walked out of the room with him. For a long while they paced the
passage-way together in whispered conversation before the nurse came
to the door and nodded.
Both went in: Athalie laughed and put up her arms as Clive bent over
her.
"All will be well," she whispered, kissed him, then turned her head
sharply to the right.
When he found himself in the garden, walking at random, the sun hung a
hand's breadth over the woods. Later it seemed to become entangled
amid new leaves and half-naked branches, hanging there motionless,
blinding, glittering through an eternity of time.
And yet he did not notice when twilight came, nor when the dusk's
purple turned to night until he saw lights turned up on both floors.
Nobody summoned him to dinner but he did not notice that. Connor came
to him there in the darkness and said that two other physicians had
arrived with another nurse. He went into the library where they were
just leaving to mount the stairs. They looked at him as they passed
but merely bowed and said nothing.
A steady, persistent clangour vibrated in his brain, dulling it, so
that senses like sight and hearing seemed slow as though drugged.
Suddenly like a sword the most terrible fear he ever knew passed
through him.... And after a while the dull, ringing clangour came
back, dinning, stupefying, interminable. Yet he was conscious of every
sound, every movement on the floor above.
* * * * *
One of the physicians came halfway down the stairs, looked at him; and
he rose mechanically and went up.
He saw nothing clearly in the room until he bent over Athalie.
Her eyes unclosed. She whispered: "It is all right, beloved."
Somebody led him out. He kept on, conscious of the grasp on his arm,
but seeing nothing.
* * * * *
He had been walking for a long while, somewhere between light and
darkness,--perhaps for hours, perhaps minutes. Then somebody came who
laid an arm about his shoulder and spoke of courage.
Other people were in the room, now. One said:
"Don't go up yet."... Once he noticed a woman, Mrs. Connor, crying.
Connor led her away.
Others moved about or stood silent; and some one was always drawing
near him, speaking of courage. It was odd that so much darkness should
invade a lighted room.
Then somebody came down the stairs, noiselessly. The house was very
still.
And at last they let him go upstairs.