_Letter from Mrs. Gregory-Browne to
Mrs. Ribbanson-Smythe.
Upper Tooting,
21st July, 1914._
MY DEAREST AGATHA,--I must tell you about an extraordinary occurrence.
They were all quite respectable people, indeed most respectable.
Perhaps I ought not to include Mr. Jones. He is, you know (I mention
this in the strictest confidence, dearest), he is not--well, you know,
he hardly belongs to our set. I cannot understand why James is so
absurdly fond of him.
It was my At Home day last week and quite a lot of people, really nice
people too, came in spite of the heat. The heat may have had something
to do with it, but I really cannot think what it was.
I handed a plate of bread-and-butter to Miss Niccole. To my surprise
she hesitated a moment and then took the plate and handed it to me.
When I declined she offered it to Mrs. Fitzroy-Williams-Adamson. You
know, dear, she is fourth cousin to a baronet. Then the extraordinary
thing occurred. Mrs. Fitzroy-Williams-Adamson took the plate and
offered it to Miss Niccole. When Miss Niccole declined it she offered
it to Mr. Wildegoose (pronounced Wildergos, you know, dear). Then it
was his turn. And so it went on. Really, it was most extraordinary.
Nothing like it has ever been known in our family. I really cannot
understand it.
Everybody passed the plate, and at last it came to Mr. Jones. He
pointed at the top piece of bread-and-butter. Yes, he actually
pointed. He then made the following extraordinary remark: "I say,
hasn't this broken loose from the bread-pudding, what, what?"
Thereupon he pushed it on one side and took the next slice. I was
ashamed and mortified for such a thing to happen in my house. Really,
it was most extraordinary.
Mr. Allen, the new curate, came in just then. He took the top slice,
but I caught him absent-mindedly putting it in a flower-pot. When he
saw me looking at him he blushed and started--started eating it,
I mean. However, he left most of it, and when everyone was gone
I examined it. It was perhaps a little hardened by the sun, but
otherwise it was quite a nice piece of bread-and-butter. I cannot
understand it at all. The whole thing was really most extraordinary
... most extraordinary.
Your ever loving SARAH.