I realized much strength by obeying the impressions of the Spirit
in writing out the foregoing covenant. God seemed present as though
I was making an agreement with a person whom I could see by my side.
Eve, Romans 12. The Lord was there to make truth effectual, and
after preaching succeeded in getting about all the members in the
altar, and we had a solemn, heart-searching time. Then we had
speaking meeting. I urged the brethren and sisters to confess what
they felt to be their true condition and their wants. About all
confessed: "I have an evil nature within me which I would like to
get rid of if that can be." "I confess I have sin in me." "Have
carnality yet in me." Glory to God, this brought the Lord very
near. My soul seemed in heaven. Everything seemed melting down
before God and yielding to his constraining love and sinners were
serious.
=16.= Sabbath. Preached on Hebrews. Had a talk with Bro. William
Fuller on sanctification. He was critical and talked for argument.
The Spirit bade me leave him, but I did not obey for some time,
wishing to show my regards for the young brother. I have learned,
however, never again to disobey God out of deference to man. When
God says cease an argument, the cause of holiness can only suffer
by disobedience. I finally withdrew to the closet and confessed my
disobedience to the Spirit. After coming out, Mr. W----, a poor
sinner, attacked me, using some insulting language. I read a little
Scripture and left him.
Eve, read 1 Thessalonians and 1 John on perfect love. The Lord's
Spirit was there to melt hearts. Opposition began to give way.
Brother Fuller, after meeting, confessed that his eyes were being
opened to the truth; hoped I would return. Bro. Abraham Whitmire
confessed his convictions that unless this community accepted
holiness the cause of religion would greatly suffer here. Others
with tears asked our prayers. Glory to God, good seed is sown here
which will bring forth in the future.
On the 19th Brother and Sister Warner began packing their goods to
move to Upper Sandusky, the home of the latter's parents. They had
received word that a holiness revival was desired in Findlay, where
the seed had already been sown. On arriving at Upper Sandusky they
found that they were already engaged for Findlay and were to go there
the following Monday. Of their work in Findlay, in which they were
assisted by Father and Mother Keller, a few selected notes from the
diary will give a sufficient account.
=24.= Reached the Bethel in Findlay before preaching. Found that
God was wondrously at work here. Twenty-three sanctified. Some of
the old members fighting the work. The Lord blessed me in preaching
full salvation. His power rested on the people and some came to the
altar. Father and I went home with Father Sherick. He had been
opposed to holiness but, thank God, he is now yielding and begins
to confess his need of full salvation. He is eighty years old
and probably fifty years a Christian--but has never grown out of
depravity.
=25.= Today we celebrate the birth of Christ. Arose before
daylight, as usual, and after my daily bath Father and I had a
precious season of prayer and praises. Met at ten at the Bethel.
Had a prayer- and general experience-meeting. The "little ones"
testified straight and strong. Eve, house full. Was asked to
preach again. Felt much straightened. The elders were to let us
know about our having the Bethel for a holiness meeting, and it
was expected that tonight the meeting should be conducted for
sinners; but last night God showed me after preaching that this
must be a holiness meeting. So I was hedged up by the church on one
side and God on the other. Tried to preach some time to sinners,
but was absolutely abandoned to myself. Oh, how empty and hollow
all I said! I saw that this would not do, so I proceeded to full
salvation for believers. Glory to God, I had some unction then, but
felt the displeasure of some of the church. Two mourners and three
believers presented themselves at the altar. One soul sanctified.
After meeting a very intelligent and pleasant sister came forward
and said, "God gave me the wonderful Christmas gift of entire
sanctification while you were preaching." Glory to God forever! We
announced meetings in the future on the holiness line.
=26.= Up before the family, bathed and prayed. A. M., wrote,
occasionally talked holiness to persons coming in seeking light.
All the city is in an uproar on holiness. Halleluiah! At half-past
two met at the Bethel. Brother Linsey led the meeting. Satan made
a dreadful rally today. All the old cold members got in the back
part of the house. Bro. Samuel Ferguson acted as spokesman for the
devil. He set out in a raging storm. Called this work the judgment
of the whore, the abomination that maketh desolate. Called God to
rebuke it, to smite it in the mouth until the blood should fly out.
He hollowed and stamped and foamed like a madman. Glory to God, who
kept his little ones in perfect peace. God gave me great peace,
and I could but say thank God for the trial of his holy cause.
I proceeded in a calm spirit to show the people some of God's
sacred truth that they were rejecting. Brother Wilson arose on the
opposition side and asked some questions, threatening a call of the
Standing Committee. May the Lord help him to seek the cleansing
blood.
A young man, member of the church, by the name of Teams stepped out
in the aisle and began to yell and stamp and walk to-and-fro. He
consumed about fifteen minutes in silly harangue against perfect
holiness by the blood of Christ. There was no reason, sense, Bible,
or even apparent civilization in his aspersions. All the little
ones were kept in perfect peace. Eve, Brother Updike preached his
farewell sermon to the church. He felt so directed because of the
recent abuses of his wife by some of the church and because of
the wicked opposition of the leaders of the church to holiness.
He declared his withdrawal from this charge. The old and formal
part of the church were aroused most furiously. I followed by some
remarks. A few came out to seek purity.
=27.= Had meeting at 2 P. M. in the court-house, whither we have
moved because of the constant disturbance in the Bethel. Eve, tried
to preach to a good congregation at the court-house. The Lord
was with us in sweet peace and power. We felt we were in a purer
spiritual atmosphere.
=30.= Sabbath. Met at ten. Heb. 13:20,21. The Lord helped me to
show the people that perfection is commanded and attained =now=;
what it is and is not; that it is not attained in conversion,
but by a second work. At 2:30 P. M. met in the court-house in a
temperance meeting. Brothers Linsey and Ackers both glorified God
by testifying to their wonderful salvation from drink and tobacco,
both having had delirium tremens several times. Brother A. called
the tobacco habit a twin sister to strong drink and claimed that
it was the cause of his becoming a drunkard. After they spoke, a
Lutheran minister arose and deprecated the springing of tobacco
in the meeting and palliated this abomination as consistent with
perfect consecration to God and piety. Shame! Shame!
A brother asked concerning our holiness. So we bowed together
and had a season of prayer, and as we afterward began to talk he
constantly interrupted me, would not let me finish a point or
connect the Scripture proofs of the two works. We bowed again in
prayer and he led. He asked God to purify his heart and take all
the evil nature out of him. After arising I remarked that as he
would interrupt all my efforts to give him instruction I would now
ask him some questions and learn. I asked him what things we were
allowed of God. Answer, "Such things as he promises." Do you always
pray for such only? "Yes." Do you receive them? "Yes." Then you
have just now been sanctified, made pure, is it not so? "Yes."
Then you should hereafter not ask God to do what he has done! But
he contended that he should keep on making the same prayer. Brother
Larcomb suggested the equal propriety of continuing to pray to God
to convert him. Oh what confusion and ignorance! Still they thought
we had gone astray.
=31.= A. M., wrote. Eve, met at seven and continued the meeting
until after twelve. The house was crowded, the isles standing full
of people to the close of the meeting. Pretty good order for the
throng. Brother Updike preached. After some altar work, we had
good testimony-meeting. I then preached a short discourse on Eph.
4:22-24. A few minutes before twelve the altar was again filled
with seekers and little ones. I read the Christian consecration,
and all said amen. The power of God came upon us. Many shouts. A
Mother Goodwin, of the M. E. Church, was the subject of a wonderful
work of grace tonight. For eighteen years she had sought for this
experience. She had a dreadful death, turned perfectly white and
shook like a leaf. She hesitated to believe through the temptation
of unworthiness. I asked her if Christ was not worthy. Told her
to believe for the glory of his name. Then she took hold. She
soon fully overcame by the blood of the Lamb and the word of her
testimony. It was a wonderful work wrought by the power of God in
one of the most intelligent and pious ladies of Findlay, of about
fifty years of age. She was filled with wonder at the great change
and testified with a halo of glory beaming from her countenance.
How can such a marked work be doubted? What a reproach upon the
ministry that this dear saint should be kept eighteen years in the
wilderness longing for some Joshua to lead her over to the land of
perfect rest of soul from all sin!
=Jan. 1, 1878.= Praise God for the mercies of the past year. I am
so thankful that the old year witnessed the final death of the old
man in me, and now for the first time I enter upon the New Year all
renewed in the image of God. Glory to his name in the highest! I
am redeemed and washed in the blood of the Lamb. O Canaan, sweet
Canaan, surely here flows milk and honey! God is my everlasting
all, my satisfying portion. Oh, wonders of redeeming love! Can
it be that through the precious blood of Christ I have "entered
into the holiest" and am forever shut in with God, and dead to
the world! O God, I feel that I can stand in thy holy presence! I
tremble with awe and reverence. O my God and Redeemer! keep me on
thine altar and in spotless purity lest I offend thy Holiness and
die. I shall forever dwell with thee, and through the riches of
thy boundless grace my whole being, every thought, word, feeling,
emotion, appetite, desire, wish, purpose, and action, yea my whole
life, shall be a continual offering to God, in the flames of his
love. Amen. Almighty, All-wise, and ever present God, fulfil this
thy pleasure in me. I am in thy hands. Amen and amen.
=A. M.=, wrote some. Met at 10 A. M. and held meetings until 4
P. M.; the power of God rested upon us. Four, I believe, were
sanctified. The Lord gave me much light on the sanctuary as setting
forth the different degrees of grace (Heb. 10:19,22). In chapter 8
the apostle compares the sanctuary and the temple service with the
present spiritual house or church. 9:9 shows that the former temple
service was typical of the church, also 10:11. Now, as the temple
all through the Bible typifies the church, so also the tabernacle.
We must make some application of its departments. This the apostle
does for us. The court represents penitence or approach to the
church, the sanctuary or "holy." From this we have access into the
"holiest." In the sanctuary they are "brethren" and (v. 22) have
"their hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience." Were justified
when they came into the holy, and now are invited into the holiest,
not into heaven but into a state of purity through the blood of
Christ.
=2.= Wrote some. Brother Doty came today. Thank the Lord. Eve.
Brother Doty preached on the difference between justification and
entire sanctification. (1) Inbred sin is not cognizable to our
consciousness when actual sin and guilt crowd the conscience. (2)
We need not lack wisdom, for such is Christ to us; but may greatly
lack knowledge. (3) Entire sanctification takes away all vain
curiosity. (4) Makes us simple in giving, etc. (5) Leaves natural
appetites the same, but removes unnatural.
Two were most gloriously sanctified, one an old mother over eighty
years of age. Oh, how wonderfully God blessed her! She ran around
as spritely as a young girl. The house, as usual, was greatly
crowded, the space on the floor about all occupied by standers.
The whole city is stirred. All the protracted efforts in the
place are without interest. All the elements are attracted here.
Sinners want this kind of religion that saves from all sin. Glory
to God forever! Some of the county officials, I presume, are
getting uneasy, hence concluded that we could no longer have the
court-house. Received the promise of the Reform house, at least for
the next evening.
=3.= God's power was with us. Three souls were sweetly sanctified,
one of whom, a sister Miller, was converted to God from Catholicism
last winter. They say her conversion was among the most bright
of the 150 converts and her life has been true. Oh how calm and
clearly she came out! Her testimony was sublime and more than
human. It was spoken by the Spirit. Praise God! Another meeting
was held in East Findlay. The Lord was also there in power. A
brother in the Church of God who had rashly denounced holiness was
sanctified at this meeting.
Eve, the promised house was not opened. The little ones were
scattered each not knowing where to meet the rest, and yet we felt
a great desire to be together. One company gathered and we went to
a United Brethren Church. As we passed along, crowds gathered after
us and asked where we were going to have meeting. The people were
much disappointed. Brother Engle, the pastor, preached an earnest
sermon to sinners from, "The way of the transgressor is hard."
I felt that the church was an iceberg between this sanctified
preacher and the sinners. We all prayed fervently for the efficacy
of the word. Some twelve arose for prayer, among the number was
Sister Wert's son, a very intelligent young man with whom I called
today. When I asked him concerning his soul's interests, he said
that he did not "go much on religion." I calmly replied that
I presumed he had none to go on. I added that I did not go on
religion either before I had any to go on. This was God-sent, and
he knew not how to express himself again. I waited a few seconds
then proposed prayer. We all kneeled and I presented him to the
mercy of God. After holding his hand and giving him a few words I
left him, praying to God to bring him down to the cross. Praise
God, I saw him rise in the congregation.
Brother Linsey and I stayed up all night in prayer to God for
Findlay. God rolled upon our hearts a dreadful agony for souls and
gave us an awful sight of the wicked apostasy of the churches. Like
the old prophets, we groaned and cried to God for salvation to come
out of Zion.
=27.= Sabbath. Met at the United Brethren Church. Good
testimony-meeting. One sister said, "I do not believe in a second
work; would as leave you would hit me in the face as to speak of
it; it is like a dart to my heart to hear it." Just so the "pure
testimony put forth in the Spirit cuts," etc. Brother Engle read
a very interesting chapter of United Brethren history showing the
holiness revival in that church. Otterbein, Bishop Edwards, Wilson,
and many others of the most eminent ministers professed and taught
holiness as a distinct work.
At this point in his diary Brother Warner tells of his expulsion from
the West Ohio Eldership, and gives the subject a special heading.
=TRIAL AND EXPULSION FROM THE WEST OHIO ELDERSHIP OF THE CHURCH OF
GOD FOR PREACHING FULL SALVATION; FOR FOLLOWING THE HOLY SPIRIT;
FOR HELPING TO SAVE OVER 150 SOULS IN THIS PLACE=
=30.= Standing Committee met in Findlay today. Principal business
to attend to was charges prefered by Bro. G. W. Wilson against
Bro. J. V. Updike and me--against him for maladministration of the
church here, deserting it, and turning church interests over to
the Holiness Alliance, etc.; against me for (1) transcending the
restrictions of the Eldership, (2) violating rules of cooperation,
(3) participating in dividing the church.
As to the first, it relates to an action of the body last Eldership
in which I was prohibited from springing the holiness meeting
on any church where they did not wish it. This charge was not
sustained by a single proof. The facts are as follows: Father
Keller was led by the Spirit to go to Findlay to procure a place
for a holiness meeting. He found a meeting in progress in the
Church of God, tried to get the house to begin as soon as they were
through, but they refused. He then engaged the Reformed house, but
left an offer still with the Church of God to occupy their house
if they concluded to let us have it. When we received word that
the meeting was about to close we went up and found it still in
progress, and as the holiness workers were there, we wished to
begin a meeting on the holiness line. We gave the church the first
offer to use their house, and they consented to our using the
house. However, this I think they did because they knew that if we
went to another house we would carry all the interests from their
house. And when the whole counsel of God was presented they could
not stand it, but gathered in the back end of the house with wicked
men and fought the work of God, so that we soon saw that nothing
could be done there, hence we removed to the court-house. I had
nothing at all to do with the appointment of the meeting there and
only did some of the preaching after Father Keller and Brothers
Ackers and Linsey had got the use of the house from the elders and
trustees, or a majority of them.
Second charge, "Violation of rules of cooperation." The rule cited
was like this: No person shall go upon another's field of labor to
hold meetings, etc, without the consent of preacher and church.
When we announced meeting at the court-house, one of the elders
announced preaching there at the Bethel the next night. Brother
Wilson filled the pulpit and continued some four or five nights
with no success and small congregations. Now, because I assisted
in the meeting at the court-house while these church services were
continued in the same town, I am thus charged, when these meetings
were really appointed after and in opposition to the real work of
the Lord, where souls were daily being saved.
Third charge, "Dividing the church." I showed that the only results
of the holiness meeting were fifty-three sinners converted and 118
believers sanctified, and that all the division and confusion was
caused by the carnal and wicked opposition on the part of the rest
of the church, just like the envious Jews stirred up the people
at Thessalonica and Berea (Acts 17) and interrupted the apostles
in their peaceable work of leading souls to Jesus, as well as
disturbed the peace of the city. The apostles, of course, had to
bear the blame, and like everywhere else they went, bonds and
prisons awaited them; and I, too, was ready to suffer affliction
with the people of God for the sake of Christ. All Adam became
aroused, so that I was stopped from reading other Scriptures. [He
had been reading and speaking from Isa. 32:15.] When for the sake
of the dear people calling themselves the Church of God I was
studying how to compromise the two elements in the church here,
the Lord gave me this text, and the Spirit led me to preach it
straight, although it conflicted with what I had cherished, that
is, a hope of fraternizing the sanctified and the unsanctified.
Eve, Brother Updike's case was adjusted by the Committee, the
elders, and himself. They tried hard to bind him down to abandon
holiness as a definite work and to have no communion with holiness
workers. He agreed to some restrictions about preaching holiness
where it was not wanted. Received his license and was placed on
McComb circuit. Evidently they have some hopes of leading him to a
recantation. May the mercy and grace of God keep him from coming
down from the highway! Brother Chambers was at our meeting in North
Findlay this eve.
=31.= Was brought to the depot this morn in sled. Heavy snow
falling. After I had been riding some time in the train with him in
conversation, Brother Cassel, one of the Committee, seeing that I
was not enough concerned to ask him what disposition they had made
of my case, informed me that the Committee had decided that the
charges were sustained, and that they had withheld my license.[8]
I thanked him for their decision and assured him that if I were to
look upon the matter from the mere human standpoint and consider my
attachment to the Church of God and her principles, I should regard
their action a dreadful calamity and intolerable to bear; but that
I had now that charity which "believeth all things" and "endureth
all things," and therefore I calmly rested in the promise of God
that "all things work together for good" to me, and the sweet
assurance that my dear Father, to whom I belonged, would turn this
and everything else (as long as I stay on the altar) to my good and
his glory. Praise his holy name! Reached home about 2 P. M.
Up to the time of leaving Findlay there were 53 converted, 118
believers sanctified, including about all the 53 converts. Many of
them were sanctified at the next meeting after converted, and a few
the same meeting. Glory to God for full salvation!
Following the effort at Findlay, a series of holiness meetings was
held at Upper Sandusky in the early part of February. Brother Dunbar
and others assisted. On the 9th, Brother Warner was called to spend
Sunday at Dunkirk, and was kept there for several days. While at
Dunkirk he was impressed by the Spirit to announce that if any sick
in the town would send for him he would go in faith to pray for them
to recover. A sister who had been afflicted for years with catarrh
in the head, which had spread to the throat and lungs so that she
was consumptive, thought much about being healed. She had strong
faith and came to meeting the next day, and in answer to prayer was
gloriously healed, perfectly sound. Another, a blacksmith in Dunkirk,
was impressed to go and pray for the healing of a young colored
sister on the verge of death from consumption. She was wonderfully
benefited, as for six weeks she had to be lifted from her bed but now
was able to arise and, assisted by the hand of a sister, walk across
the floor. She had been able only to whisper, but now could sing
praises to God.
Brother Warner felt that he should return to Upper Sandusky to assist
in the meetings that were being held there. In a day or two after
returning he was called back to Dunkirk to preach the funeral of
the young colored sister. The brother who had prayed for her and
a sister who had strong faith believed that God would raise the
departed sister from the dead in answer to their prayers. Brother
Warner announced the funeral for 10 A. M., if the Lord did not direct
matters otherwise. He prayed and examined the scriptures relative
to miracles and found that (1) Christ aroused and inspired faith
and admiration in the people by miracles, (2) the final commission
teaches miracles, (3) they were the means of the success of the
apostles, (4) the gift is set in the church. Hence, he concluded that
miracles were to be a permanent factor in the system of salvation. He
does not say that he was particularly impressed that God was going
to work a miracle in this case. He rather fell in with the idea as
urged by the sister who felt so impressed. At her home she and her
husband and Brother Warner waited in prayer for some time, then went
to the house where the corpse lay. The two brethren kneeled in prayer
while the sister uncovered the body and commanded the departed to
arise in the name of Jesus. Their faith for some time was wonderfully
strong and they confidently expected to see her arise. They held on
with unwavering faith for half an hour, when they all felt relieved
and that the will of the Lord had been done. Brother Warner preached
the funeral the next day. He writes that this incident seemed only to
increase their faith and that he believed that God was well pleased
with the effort to exert this faith; that if not through them, God
would through some one else revive this element of apostolic power.
There was a report, intended to ridicule, and published by some who
opposed Brother Warner, that he with others tried to bring a dead
body to life by standing it on its feet and commanding it to walk,
etc. This of course was untrue.
Remaining in Dunkirk for a few days, he held meetings which resulted
in about twenty conversions. He found himself much attached to the
brethren and sisters here. They had come out of the United Brethren
and Methodist Episcopal denominations and had formed themselves into
a Wesleyan body. Many of them, however, were not satisfied with a
human church and creed and there was a strong tendency to come to
the apostolic faith. Returning to Upper Sandusky he assisted in the
meetings there. In company with Father and Mother Keller he visited
the jail and prayed with the convicts. One of those, by name, John
Bristol, was gloriously converted. Bristol said he did not care a
cent to get out of jail so long as Jesus stayed with him. He had been
badly abandoned and had followed shows, drinking, balloon ascensions,
etc. He once fell sixty feet from a balloon, breaking an arm, a leg,
splitting a hip socket, etc. The sparing of his life was only by the
mercy of God.
For the 7th of March 1878 we quote the following:
Fellowshiped some fourteen souls in the Church of God formed on a
congregational basis, with holiness the principal foundation-stone.
On the 31st of last January the Lord showed me that holiness could
never prosper upon sectarian soil encumbered by human creeds and
party names, and he gave me a new commission to join holiness and
all truth together and build up the apostolic church of the living
God. Praise his name! I will obey him.
In March an evangelistic effort was made in Tiffin, but with
difficulty. The denominational houses seemed to be closed to
holiness. A few meetings were held in a private house and in a rented
room. He states that at this place Sister Warner was called to go to
Mansfield to assist in a holiness meeting. This was a peculiar test
and he thus speaks of it:
=23.= Sarah left today. The Lord tested our loyalty by requiring
us to labor apart. At first I disbelieved that it was the order
of God and was decidedly opposed to her going. So were Father and
Mother Keller. I thought it would give place to the devil and
hurt the sacred cause and endanger our domestic happiness. But
this morn I arose early and consulted the Lord. I laid down all
my understanding and the many seemingly plain reasons for her not
going and besought God to direct the matter, and to my astonishment
the Holy Spirit confirmed Sarah's call by reminding me of my solemn
covenant with God, that there I had laid her on the altar and given
her back to God to use her where and as he saw fit. At the same
time all unwillingness vanished from my mind. In fact, a desire was
at once created within me for her to go.
O God, thy ways are not our ways, but we will walk in thy ways all
the days of our life. Season sad. Here she is greatly needed; there
is a strong old band. How would it look for me to work for God here
and she whom the Lord had joined to me go elsewhere? Were I at
home, not at all in a meeting, then there could be no appearance
of evil in her going. But ah! I now see there would then be no
test, which is just the thing God intended. Abraham's faith would
not have been half so much tried and proved had not Isaac been the
heir of the promise. Father and Mother still strongly opposed her
going, so that doubtless she would have shrunk with a burdened
heart from the call had not God raised help in me.
On the 4th of April he received a letter from her stating that
the meeting at Mansfield was excellent for the establishing and
strengthening of God's little ones, and that she had gone home.
During this time Brother Warner was getting much light on the
Scriptures concerning holiness and was writing with the view of
publishing a tract on the subject. The matter he was accumulating,
however, proved to be enough for a book, which, as we shall see, was
published two years later. Also, he speaks of an effort at this time
to obtain more of the manifestation of God in his soul.
=25.= I set out this day to seek a more full and conscious
manifestation of the Father, Son, and the Holy Ghost in my heart.
Spent much time in the closet. Visited and prayed with a few
families.
=30.= Prayed much for a more perfect, full, constant, and conscious
manifestation of God in my soul. Had a glorious victory. Yesterday
Brother Lee was about to start to walk home to Nevada, twenty-two
miles. I thought it was too hard a task with such muddy roads. How
I wished for the means to send him home by railroad! Recently,
being without means to send a letter, I took it to the Lord, and
before I had the letter written a kind sister gave me fifty cents.
I had a quarter left and I thought of giving it to Brother Lee if
others would make up the remainder. But then the tempter said, "You
are dependent yourself and should not give to others that which
the Lord has sent to meet your wants." I took it to the Lord and
the Spirit said, "Give and it shall be given." I gave the quarter
to Brother Lee. The dollar needed by him was soon made, and he was
able to stay until this morn. Praise God, this morn a kind sister
called and said the Lord had sent her to give me a dollar. The
Spirit kept his promise and gave four-fold.
=Apr. 3, 1878.= God is daily giving me more of his great fulness
and conforming me more and more to his glorious image. This is
because I am earnestly endeavoring to consecrate more perfectly
every moment of my time to him and because I spend more time with
God alone in the closet. I have on several occasions besought
God to conform me more perfectly to his nature, and without any
particular emotions that might indicate the answer I claimed the
desire of my heart and by faith thanked Father that he had granted
my petitions. To the glory of God I can say that as I went on my
way I found from hour to hour that as my faith was so was it meted
out to me. Oh, how sweet it is to go to our heavenly Father for
all our heart's and soul's need, and in the name of Jesus ask for
it rejoicing that we know we have the desire of our heart! Surely
"happy are the people that are in such a case; yea, happy are the
people whose God is the Lord."
On his return to Upper Sandusky on April 9 he found some urgent calls
to go to Indiana, and he felt that the Lord was in it. On Sunday the
14th, he conducted the services in Upper Sandusky. The theme in the
evening was, Salvation from Church, using 1 Pet. 1:18,19 and 2 Pet.
1:3,4--deliverance from all that is human and the reception of all
that is of divine origin.
The Lord blessed me and greatly awakened my own mind and I think
opened the eyes of others to the importance of abandoning all human
and party creeds, party names, party spirit, and party interests
in order to maintain a life of perfect holiness, as well as to the
duty of returning to the "faith once delivered to the saints" in
its entirety.
It is interesting to note that at this time, coincident to his
receiving the call to Indiana, there came to his mind the idea of
using the printing-press as a means of publishing the gospel truth he
was so burdened to promulgate.
Recently I asked my heavenly Father to send means to meet our
wants, pay debts, and as soon as I was ready to print my work on
holiness, to furnish the means. I received gracious answers by
the Spirit, and the following night while lying in meditation how
I could better honor God in publishing full salvation, the Lord
opened a new field for me. The Spirit suggested that my heavenly
Father would provide me with a small hand printing-press by means
of which I could print my book myself and scatter many holiness
tracts as leaves of salvation.
Praise God, today I received a most cheering letter from Eld. W. W.
Roberts, of Missouri. He is in the land of Canaan, and having seen
my articles and the Standing Committee's action in the Advocate
he writes to encourage me in the good work; and though he knows
nothing of my circumstances he offers to furnish me some money if
I need it. Praise God, who is faithful and always heareth his poor
and needy little ones that cry unto him.
Returning to Tiffin with his father-in-law, Keller, he found the
little ones in good spirits. All testified definitely and boldly. He
held three services there on the following Sunday. He found there had
come to be a wonderful awakening in Tiffin among the denominational
churches on the subject of perfect holiness.
On the 22nd he took train for New Washington, the place of his
childhood home. Here seven years previous he labored alone in a
revival that resulted in the salvation of about fifty souls. For
one year they did well. A good house of worship was built and twice
a week it was filled at prayer-meetings that were very lively and
interesting. But adversity came and there now remained but a small
force of faithful ones to tell the story of salvation. Elder Oliver,
who had preferred charges against him for the preaching of holiness,
was in charge of the work here and of course had greatly prejudiced
the people against holiness. Two of the flock, however, had received
the experience.
At this place, through his brother Lewis, who lived in the vicinity,
he learned that his father was very poorly and he at once became much
burdened for his father's soul.
=May 5, 1878.= Sabbath. Met about 10 A. M. All the little ones
testified boldly in the Spirit to sanctification. Brother Oliver
and wife were much annoyed at the same. Brother O. preached from
Rev. 21:27. A good text to enforce holiness, but alas, the time and
opportunity were wasted in attacks upon the Lord's work of full
salvation. How my heart was grieved that the dear brother was not
led by the Spirit of God! What a favorable opportunity and text to
set forth the necessity of holiness and the all-cleansing blood!
But alas, how few unsanctified preachers know what spirit they are
of! Oh, how little they value the worth of souls! How indifferent
to the solemn responsibilities of the ministry!
=16.= [At Upper Sandusky.] Preached the funeral of a poor sinner
who was accidentally shot dead with a revolver. He died in fifteen
minutes, calling upon God for mercy. He was married one week ago
today. Life is but a vapor.
On the 16th he left for Indiana. He reached Silver Lake, Kosciusko
County, the next day and was met by Bro. F. Krause and conveyed seven
miles through a heavy rain to Beaver Dam. In spite of bad weather a
fair congregation assembled that evening to hear him preach. About
all manifested their desire for sanctification by rising to their
feet. In his sermon on Sunday he identified the inheritance in
sanctification with the promise made to Abraham. At the afternoon
service about fifteen were at the altar seeking full salvation.
In this section of the country Brother Warner found many warm hearts.
They had read his articles on holiness in the Church Advocate, and
had doubtless heard of his rejection by the Ohio Eldership. He held
meetings at Beaver Dam, Yellow Lake, and Silver Lake. His diary gives
the following account for Sunday, May 26, at Yellow Lake.
Sabbath. This day was put in for God. From my waking moments this
morn I began to plead with God for the salvation of the people.
Had gracious answers to prayer. Was sure God would save a number
of souls. We had announced a fast all day, and meeting to begin
at 10 A. M. and continue until 4 P. M. The house was filled. Had
a lively testimony-meeting. Preached on the tabernacle (Hebrews).
Several at the altar. But there seemed to be a dulness. None
grasped the blessings. We had speaking-meeting, but the interest
seemed to be moderate. I was impressed that the dear little ones
were hungry, and Satan said we had better close. But, glory to God,
I knew that God would yet come and save souls, as he impressed me
in the morning, hence I held on to him. Preached a short discourse
on faith and gave another invitation. Several came to the altar
for sanctification and soon the holy fire fell on us from heaven,
and all were sanctified. Some that were not at the altar received
the blessing. The Holy Ghost filled the house, and there was great
rejoicing. A fellowship-meeting resulted from following the Spirit;
and as the dear ones went about shaking hands many, yea, about
all in the house, were melted to tears. I gave another invitation
and then friend Yocum came out, also Brother Bear's daughter, and
another young lady for sanctification. She soon received a glorious
baptism, and Sister Bear was converted. Came home with Brother
Bear. We did not get to close until nearly five o'clock. Spent much
of the time until eve on my knees.
Eve, house crowded. People were there from a distance of six and
eight miles. I preached mainly to sinners. I had announced a few
nights ago that I had an impression to preach to the unconverted,
but I now see my mistake. I should have made no such announcement.
The Spirit seemed to be baffled in giving me a subject. I did more
preaching myself tonight than I have for a long time, was conscious
that Christ Jesus was not preaching as much as usual. Thank the
Lord for the lesson learned. Three at the altar. Brother Yocum
was greatly smitten down by the Spirit; all physical strength was
gone. About 9:30 P. M. we dismissed the congregation, but Brother
Y. would not leave the altar. Several of us stayed until after
eleven. He was measurably blessed. He has been a very good moral,
benevolent, and honorable man, and thought heretofore that he had
but little sin and could easily get salvation when he once came for
it; but he found himself a great sinner under the searching light
of the Spirit.
Glory to God for this day's work! It was a high day for my soul.
Among the fourteen sanctified were two very fine young men by the
name of Smith. They are brothers, both school-teachers, and I pray
that God will make them both very useful.
He found a wide-spread awakening for holiness in this part of
Indiana. The time for the annual Eldership Meeting of the Church was
at hand, and he asked the Lord whether he might not stay and attend
the meetings instead of going to the Eldership. As there were others
who could continue the meetings the Spirit seemed to relieve his mind
of all burden for that place, and he felt it his duty to attend the
Eldership.
=June 1, 1878.= Came home today. Found family well. At the General
Eldership I found that the leaven of full salvation was working.
Had many private talks. Found some in the experience, but rather
mute. Strengthened them. Many spoke of my articles in the Advocate
and said they were seeking light. But the Eldership possesses
little of the power of godliness. The first night it made me mourn
for Jerusalem. Here were assembled the best elements of the whole
church, and yet I could feel no God in her. There was no spirit
of devotion, no communion with God. Pride and nearly every other
manifestation of carnality were manifest. God save the Church.
Thank God for the blessing of home and family. Dear Wife met me at
the train.
=9.= Sabbath [at Findlay]. Awoke before day. Was much pressed in
spirit for Brother Burchard. Arose early and had a gracious season
of prayer. Was led out much for Brother B. At 10:30 A. M. heard him
preach. A dreadful death reigned over the congregation. He spoke
with a good deal of energy, according to his pathetic temperament,
but he surely had not help by the Spirit. But I think he is honest,
and if he had the cloud of prejudice removed from his mind he would
want full salvation and would be useful. Oh, that God would lead
him into the light!
Feeling that he should visit his father, in Williams County, he
took train for Bryan, Ohio, on the 10th, arriving there late in the
evening. The account of the death of his father and of the events
that followed are here given.
=June 11.= Arose early. After devotion and my usual morning bath,
I paid for lodging, went to the baker's and got a loaf of graham
bread, and started on my way. Got to ride about five miles and
footed the rest. Reached Father's about half-past ten. Found him
very weak, and failing. He was overcome by emotion when I came
in. His breathing is difficult. I soon sought a private room and
poured out my heart for his salvation. Brother Joseph is staying
with him all the time. Father can not last long. Oh that God would
be pleased to have mercy upon his poor soul!
=14.= Father still failing.
=15.= Brother Lewis reached here about 5 P. M. Eve, went to the
Cogswell Schoolhouse to hear Bro. Henry Barckley, but he having
gone from home did not appear. I was asked to improve the time.
After prayer I began to look to the Lord for a message, but
nothing came to hand. Soon young Brother Wallace came in. He came
by request to fill the appointment. He had only once before tried
to preach. He was indisposed to go ahead; but I told him that
I thought it was the order of the Lord. He consented. Did well
enough, but needs the special unction of the Holy Ghost. I talked
some.
=16.= Sabbath. L. W. Guiss came at four o'clock this morning.
Father failing very fast this morning. At 10:30 A. M. met a
congregation at the Cogswell Schoolhouse. Heb. 7:25. God blessed
his precious word. Mr. Guiss, my brother-in-law, who has become a
bold infidel, was much affected by God's truth. Some wept for clean
hearts. I asked all who knew they were children of God to hold up
their hands. A good number responded. I then asked all who could
testify to perfect salvation from all sin to hold up their hands,
but there was no response. But when I asked all who wished to be
wholly the Lord's to hold up their hands, a number responded, some
with tears. Time would not permit altar exercise.
Took dinner at Brother Joseph's and came back. Found Father
declining very fast. Poor man, he is near his end, yet unsaved.
O my God, must my poor father go into eternity bearing all the
sins of his past life! Oh the death of an immortal soul! Since
God has converted my soul and called me into the ministry, I
have often seen Father's heart touched by divine truth and the
Holy Spirit. Tears flowed freely, but he would not yield. When I
began to preach, twelve years ago, I spent a summer at home, and
he afterward told Mrs. Rang that my constant praying gave him
much trouble and that he was glad I was gone. I marked the deep
convictions that followed him all that summer and hoped he would
soon be brought to God, but he wore them away. Two years ago this
coming July my beloved mother passed away gloriously saved. She
held his hand and exhorted him until he trembled. Not long after,
I came home and spoke in the Dean Church, when he was greatly
melted down. I gave an invitation to come to God, but again he
refused Christ. Since his last illness, I have daily implored the
mercy of God upon his poor soul. Since I have been with him I have
talked to him about his soul, but do not see that he was awakened
to his condition. I felt that all depended upon the blessed Holy
Ghost to discover to him his sin and awful danger. He asked my
prayers and songs of salvation. He shed tears over the wicked
infidelity of G., my brother-in-law; but when he made any reference
to his hope he based it all upon his principles of honesty and
doing right and that he had favored a good many persons in his
life, etc. He confessed some misgivings of conscience for not
having been confirmed in the Lutheran Church as he had promised his
parents he would when married; but said he, "I always felt some way
that I could not get religion." When conscious of much distress he
would wish he might die. Once he feared that he might have to lie a
long time, and when on a certain occasion his throat seemed to be
closed against food, he said, "I just believe that it is my doom to
lie here and waste away; that there is nothing grown for me to eat
any more." Frequently he expressed a strong desire to get well; but
I never heard him say that if he did he would live a different life.
I went alone into the woods where so often I sought God and his
grace when a young convert. I had a long and precious communion
with God. Returned. Father is very rapidly approaching his end. He
can not live through another night. Once while I was wetting his
lips he looked very pitifully at me and said, "If you could only
give me something that would make me well!"
O my God, how hard it is to close a life that was not given to
thee! But it is appointed unto man once to die, and after this the
judgment. Joseph feels this stroke very much. I thought it best not
to go to the schoolhouse this eve.
9:30 P. M. Father is gone. He passed off with no struggles or
convulsions. His spirit has left the body. Probation is ended,
and a lifeless corpse only remains. I sensibly feel the cords of
love that bind my heart to my last earthly parent, but the gentle
breathings of the Spirit of God seemed so graciously to sustain me
that all was calm within. I felt a perfect loyalty to God and all
his providence that so sweetly over all prevailed and gave me such
perfect peace that I could not even weep. Oh, how tranquilizing to
my soul was the deep assurance that God doeth all things well!
=17.= Brother Joseph is almost down sick with sorrow and loss of
rest. Poor father lies a corpse. Two brothers, L. W. Guiss, and I
wore away the long melancholy day as best we could.
=18.= Last night at twelve o'clock Mr. Double awoke me and said
there were some gentlemen without that had a telegram for me. I
arose and dressed, feeling a very calm peace keeping me. The Holy
Spirit brought these words to me: "He shall not be afraid of evil
tidings." The following was the dispatch: "Come home, your child
is very sick. L. W. Keller." I came in, examined the papers and my
railroad guide. Found that a train left Bryan at 8 A. M. that made
connection at Toledo, bringing me to Upper Sandusky at 1 P. M., but
if I waited for a later train I should not reach home until late
at night. What shall I do? Here lay my father cold in death, to
be buried this A. M., and should I stay or not? I had a season of
communion with the Lord, and the Spirit seemed to say go. I took
my usual morning bath, packed my valise, and started to my brother
Joseph's, bidding adieu to my brother Lewis and my lifeless father,
the latter of course to see no more until the heavens cease to be
and the earth shall flee away before the approach of the great
Judge of the human family.
I was conveyed to Bryan by David Warner, my nephew. Improved the
time in meditation and prayer. I recalled the feeling that had
rested upon me for some days, a deep solicitude for my family. Both
on Sabbath and yesterday I went out into the woods where I used to
seek the Lord when a convert and besought God to preserve my dear
family. I also felt led to ask God to try us in any way he wished
to. I felt the need of some trial of our faith and loyalty to God.
In my deep meditation and fervent prayer to God the time passed
off swiftly with the fast gliding train, and at 1 P. M. we
reached Upper Sandusky. Leaving my valise, I walked out at once
and found the dear child very sick, having first taken down with
a sick stomach and then with the affliction developing in the
brain. The precious creature recognized me and made an effort to
embrace me with her loving little arms. Her sweet little lips
could responsively receive a father's kiss, but they were silent
for want of sufficient strength to articulate, A good number of
kind neighbors were in attendance, and I at once saw what was
threatening the very life of the poor little sufferer. She was
exquisitely fine in the texture of brain and her head measured
nineteen inches in circumference around her forehead, and she
had a very sensitive nervous temperament. Hence it was extremely
important that the most perfect silence should be maintained in her
presence, and with this strong nervous action, with any sickness or
weakness, much talk and noise would necessarily draw the disease to
the brain. I had her removed from the room where the family mostly
stayed and everybody came in, to a more retired room; demanded
silence and forbade more than two at a time to be in the room.
Sarah had seen the necessity of such regulations, but many dear
good old sisters, not knowing their importance, were much inclined
to sit around the lounge and talk, and not being in her own house
she had not been able to enforce them.
=19.= Dear Levilla still low, but I had good hopes of her recovery.
Spent as much time as I could with the Lord. Left all with him.
=20.= Dear child still dangerous, but we trust some better.
=21.= The doctor could see no improvement.
=22.= Wife and I thought Levilla better and still clung to the Lord
for her life if it be his will to restore her; but all others had
given up hope. We thought it impossible that we should do without
the company of this sweet little creature.
=23.= Sabbath. The doctor did not come as usual this morning. I
presume from the report last eve he supposed she was dead; but
all day she seemed better. P. M., sent for doctor. He thought she
had some symptoms for the better, which raised our hopes. Eve, a
number came in and despite our efforts to keep them away they would
crowd around the dear child. She grew worse. She had had very light
spasms all day but they did not seem to hurt her; but now she began
to fail fast. Phlegm began to accumulate in her little throat,
making it difficult to breathe.
=24.= Toward morning the poor little sufferer was compelled to
struggle hard to get her breath, and it became apparent that unless
God miraculously interposed, her suffering must soon end in death.
While we sorrowed for her suffering, we felt a calm and sweet
resignation to the will of God, to whom the dear child belonged.
We could say in truth, "Thy will be done." At five o'clock in the
morning her redeemed spirit was freed from its earthly abode and
taken away to be with Jesus and holy angels.
Now remained only the poor little emaciated body. As we recalled
the large, active, plump, and rosy-cheeked Levilla, we could
scarcely help but exclaim as we looked upon the reduced and
colorless form, "Is this Levilla? Can it be that this is our
child?" Since my return I had anxiously cherished a hope that ere
long I should hear those sweet lips utter words again; but they
are now silent in death, or rather the sweet and dreamless sleep
that shall pass off when the Lord comes to call us forth from our
earthly repose.
=25.= ... Brother Leay conducted services. We looked for the last
time upon our beloved child, whose sweet and innocent little form
was robed in its little white dress and skirts, with a beautiful
little bouquet of flowers protruding from her little hands folded
upon her heart. As my dear wife was deeply afflicted with her
departure, her sweet little face seemed to speak forth from its
little white coffin and say, "Weep not, dear mother, for though
your loss seems to be great, my gain is infinitely greater. I have
gone to the better land, where sickness, sorrow, pain, and death
never, never come."
We laid the dear and only child in the Mission Cemetery at Upper
Sandusky, near the road at the west side, between two evergreens.
There with sad, yet resigned, hearts we left her to sleep beneath
the angels' care until called forth at the last day.
Levilla Modest was born Mar. 18, 1875, near Seward, Nebr. She
passed from suffering to the society of angels June 24, 1878, and
was therefore three years, three months, and six days of age. She
was a child of more than ordinary mental ability. Her organic
quality was the very finest. Her temperaments were sanguine and
mental. Her brain measured nineteen inches. Though of such great
nervous activity, we had by careful diet imparted to her a good,
large physical structure. She measured three feet five inches.
She was very knowing about all kinds of work, and ever eager to
assist. For some months past she would stand upon a chair beside
her mother and wipe knives, forks, spoons, saucers, etc., with the
utmost care and perfection. She would do the most of her dressing
and undressing, and never failed to hang up or put away every
garment and everything she handled. She seemed to have very fine
taste and perfect order. Her causality was wonderfully developed
for a child.... She daily astonished us with questions concerning
everything she saw, and her remarkable ability to anticipate what
next was wanted, and with what eagerness those little feet ran
errands for mother and father, and grandmother and grandfather.
Since eighteen months old she would sing parts of familiar tunes
and hymns. I believe her first was Happy Day. For some time past
she would tread the organ with one foot, place her little fingers
upon the keys, and sing loudly, "Halleluiah, 'tis done," "I am
washed in the blood of the Lamb," etc. She had a remarkable
tendency to imitate all that was pure and religious. She often
had her little prayer-meetings by herself, and would teach older
children to engage with her in her childish prayers and songs.
After attending an ordinance where she paid marked attention to
the saints' washing feet, the next day she called for a washbowl
of water and washed her feet, then took off her mother's shoes
and stockings and washed and wiped her feet and gave her a kiss.
Every evening she kneeled at her mother's knee and said her little
prayer. At the sight of the picture with raised hands she was sure
to say, "Man lift up hands and praise the Lord." In her sickness
she would sometimes sigh out, "O, praise the Lord!"... She excelled
all other peculiarities in the wonderful depth and fervency of her
affections. Her love seemed to possess the purity and strength
of one fully renewed in the image of God and yet the innocence
and simplicity of a child. As she placed those precious little
arms around our necks and gave the warm kiss, we could not help
but feel that this was real and not mere child's play; and those
embraces were free for all who sought them.... This is my birthday;
a sad one: but still in the midst of all the Lord supports me and
comforts. Though we can not understand this bereavement, yet God
knows all about it and will doubtless bring our highest good and
his own glory out of it. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away.
Blessed is the name of the Lord.
=26, 27.= Spent the time largely in communing with God. Wrote some
letters.
=29.= Wife and I drove to Tiffin. When about one mile from the
city our beast, that we thought very safe and quiet, began to make
efforts to run off. I held her, when she began to kick desperately.
I turned her to the side of the way and got her stopped. Before
this I was out. I told Sarah to get out behind if she could. We had
a top-buggy. The curtain was rolled up, but she could not get out.
The beast was loose from the buggy all but the holdbacks. Sarah
got out and stood a moment, when she found that she was hurt.
Some friends came up just then. I gave the mare to one to hold and
I helped Sarah to the fence, where she sat upon a stone. We found
that she had been hit upon both limbs. On one the mare's hoof (she
had no shoes) cut through linen duster, dress, skirt, and stocking,
and cut a small wound to the bone. She had much pain. Three or
four men kindly tendered all the help they could. They took us in
a one-horse wagon to Tiffin, having fastened our buggy behind, and
one led the mare. We came to Sister Lewis'. A small congregation
gathered and I preached a short discourse, of course on holiness.
=July 2, 1878.= Got a crutch for Sarah. She concluded that she
could go home by railroad. Took her to the train and committed her
to the care of the Lord. I drove the mare and buggy, trusting in
God for his protection from all harm by the way. The Lord preserved
me from harm. Found dear Wife had safely made the trip.
=4.= Spent much of the day picking berries all alone with the Lord.
Meditated upon the goodness of God in continuing our national
blessings.
=6.= Spent the day in prayer, meditation, and reading. Impressed
with the duty of preaching against the enormous sin and galling
yoke of sectarianism.
=7.= Sabbath. God helped me and blessed me in exposing the yokes of
Satan by which God's children are brought under bondage.
On the 12th of July, 1878, Brother Warner, accompanied by his wife,
made a second trip to Indiana. He stopped in Goshen with Mr. Guiss,
his brother-in-law, on the 18th. As the latter was a bold and
reckless infidel, he did not enjoy his visit there. He felt that
he was staying where the Savior was excluded and that he could be
admitted only apart from him.
He reached Yellow Lake on the 20th, and found that the meetings had
been carried on for a few evenings after he left in May. Several had
been saved. On the 23rd his wife returned home to Ohio, while he went
on to Auburn, to Brother Lowman's, whom he found firmly established
in holiness. When he and Brother Lowman began to open their minds
to each other he found that both had been impressed with the idea of
together printing a holiness and church paper, Brother Warner to edit
the former and Brother Lowman the latter department.
After discussing the publishing project with Lowman he returned to
Ohio, to Wood County, where he held a number of meetings and assisted
in a camp-meeting near Rising Sun, and also attended a United
Brethren camp-meeting at Portage. He speaks thus of a manifestation
in his meetings at Rising Sun:
=Aug. 22, 1878.= Mr. Gay, a spiritualist, or rather a mesmerist
who possesses a superior mind and is believed to be possessed by
evil spirits, was present. He has attended for some time and has at
different times attempted to mesmerize me while preaching. At a few
of the last meetings his wife has been seeking sanctification, and
he has made some good speeches in favor of the gospel. Today from
the beginning of the meeting he began to maneuver his spiritism.
He made many strange motions; walked the floor once and tried to
dance. It is probable that this was all involuntary on his part.
But we all kept our minds on Jesus and God through the Holy Spirit
to take care of him. He began to show signs of distress, got upon
the floor, wept and cried out. A stronger power than the indwelling
one had taken hold of him. His suffering became more intense. His
wife brought him water and he drank some. She fanned him for a long
time, and he became speechless and seemed nearly suffocated.
In September, Brother Warner attended the Ohio Holiness Camp-meeting
held on the fair-ground at Marion. Of his experience there he records
the following:
=Sept. 8, 1878.= Sabbath. I began to fast on Friday. Ate but little
yesterday and nothing this forenoon. The Lord came very near to
me. Oh, how he let me down to nothingness! I saw and felt ashamed
of the trouble the Lord has had with me. I sank down into the dust
before him, and instead of wondering why God did not give the
greater measure of power that the Spirit impressed me I should have
I was led to wonder that he had intrusted me as much as he had. Oh,
what shameful weakness and many errors were disclosed by the more
perfect light that God has flashed into my soul! O God, let me be
buried deeper and more perfectly hid away with thee.
=12.= Came home. An incident in this camp-meeting should be
recorded to the glory of God. Brother Rudic took sick not long
after he came here. After lying in camp a few days he was taken to
Brother Kennedy's. Prayers were being offered for him, still he
grew worse. Last Saturday night he sent word to camp that after
meeting a few believers should get together and ask God in faith
for his recovery. They did so, and great power and strong assurance
came upon them. They claimed the answer to their prayer, and some
of the number were able to praise God for the brother's restoration
just as if he had been raised up before their eyes. Sister Lea, who
had taken violently sick that eve, was also taken to the Lord with
much assurance. The next morn both were in camp perfectly healed.
Brother R. suffered so much during the night and was so reduced
that he thought he surely must die, and made some arrangements for
his departure. But early in the morning he began to look to God
once more, when his faith joined that of the party in the camp at
eleven in the night, and he arose, instantly made whole. All glory
to God!
Following the part just quoted there is a gap in his diary until
October 2, the entry for which will explain. In this, one observes
his humility, his deep self-examination and his desire to exalt God
alone.
=Oct. 2, 1878.= Today I resume my pen again, with an earnest
endeavor to record some of the mercies and blessings of God upon
my poor soul. After I returned from camp-meeting, the Lord saw
fit in his tender love to suffer affliction to befall me. Yea, "I
was brought very low, but he helped me." I had bilious remittent
fever and an attack of hemorrhage of the lungs. Friends and even a
physician were much alarmed and felt my work was done. As soon as
taken down, I ordered cards sent to the "little ones" at different
places to pray for me. I put my case in the hands of the Lord and
wished only his will. Dear Wife was kept in great tranquility of
mind through an unwavering faith in God that he would raise me up
again. My rest in God was so deep and perfect that I hardly knew
anything of my physical condition. I thought myself but slightly
ill, when others despaired of my life. For a few days I talked only
in a whisper, and when I began to recover I was astonished to find
myself reduced to a mere frame and unable to stand.
During my afflictions, the Lord not only kept my mind in perfect
peace, but also taught me many precious lessons of my littleness
and his exalted greatness. Oh! let us praise and magnify the name
of the Lord. I saw myself but a speck of dust resting upon an
invisible grain of sand. Oh, how the eye of God scrutinized my past
life and showed me yet more than at the camp-meeting my weakness
and unworthiness! Oh, how vile I had been in the sight of God! How
many times Satan had succeeded in resurrecting some self in me! The
Spirit has plainly shown me that I should never speak of having
prayed for certain persons in connection with their conversion,
etc. Oh! I am so ashamed of my folly and weakness in often relating
such things. I thought I was doing it all to the glory of God,
but now I can see that there was some self in it. O Lord! save
me in the future from such presumption and sin. I thank thee for
this affliction, for I know it is all for the good of my soul.
Thou hast also shown me that I have boasted too much of my health
and ascribed it too generally to my knowledge of and prudence in
observing natural laws. O God forgive me of this offense. I thank
thee that thou hast such a constant supervision over all thy works
that every good must be ascribed to thee and thanks be given to
thee just the same as if no means were used at all to convey them
to us. Blessed God, let me sink down forever out of self. I cried
unto thee and thou hast healed me. Thou hast brought up my soul
from the grave. Thou hast kept me alive that I should not go down
to the pit. Sing unto the Lord, O ye saints of his, and give thanks
at the remembrance of his holiness!
=3.= I have had a desire to attend the Northern Indiana Eldership,
which convenes tomorrow eve. But Wife and friends all intreated
that I should not venture from home in my present weak condition,
so this morning I went to my study to write a letter to that body;
but before doing so I consulted the Lord, when he gave me a strong
baptism of the Spirit to go and a strong assurance that he would
abundantly support me and strengthen me. I said: Lord, I will go in
thy name. I firmly declared my intentions. Wife began to take the
matter to the Lord and soon felt resigned. Oft through the day as I
thought of going the Spirit would come upon me, and I increased in
strength with wonderful rapidity.
On the morning of the 4th he was conveyed to town to take the train.
The weather was unfavorable and there was some rain, but he felt he
was carrying out the Lord's purpose and the Lord sustained him. From
Ada, Ohio, to Fort Wayne, Ind., he had the company of Bros. S. Rice
and C. E. Rowley, two prominent holiness evangelists. He reached
Silver Lake in the evening and was conveyed to Beaver Dam, the place
of the Eldership meeting.