FURTHER ANSWERS TO PRAYER
THE remarkable and gracious deliverance I have spoken of, was a great
joy to me, as well as a strong confirmation of faith; but of course ten
shillings, however economically used, will not go very far, and it was
none the less necessary to continue in prayer, asking that the larger
supply which was still due might be remembered and paid. All my
petitions, however, appeared to remain unanswered; and before a
fortnight had elapsed I found myself pretty much in the same position
that I had occupied on the Sunday night already made so memorable.
Meanwhile, I continued pleading with GOD, more and more earnestly, that
He would graciously remind my employer that my salary was overdue. Of
course it was not the want of the money that distressed me--that could
have been had at any time for the asking--but the question uppermost in
my mind was this: "Can I go to China? or will my want of faith and power
with GOD prove to be so serious an obstacle as to preclude my entering
upon this much-prized service?"
As the week drew to a close I felt exceedingly embarrassed. There was
not only myself to consider; on Saturday night a payment would be due to
my Christian landlady which I knew she could not well dispense with.
Ought I not, for her sake, to speak about the matter of the salary? Yet
to do so would be, to myself at any rate, the admission that I was not
fitted to undertake a missionary enterprise. I gave nearly the whole of
Thursday and Friday--all the time not occupied in my necessary
employment--to earnest wrestling with GOD in prayer. But still on
Saturday morning I was in the same position as before. And now my
earnest cry was for guidance as to whether it was my duty to break
silence and speak to my employer, or whether I should still continue to
wait the FATHER's time. As far as I could judge, I received the
assurance that to wait His time was best; and that GOD in some way or
other would interpose on my behalf. So I waited, my heart being now at
rest and the burden gone.
About five o'clock that Saturday afternoon, when the doctor had finished
writing his prescriptions, his last circuit for the day being taken, he
threw himself back in his arm-chair, as he was wont, and began to speak
of the things of GOD. He was a truly Christian man, and many seasons of
very happy spiritual fellowship we had together. I was busily watching,
at the time, a pan in which a decoction was boiling that required a good
deal of attention. It was indeed fortunate for me that it was so, for
without any obvious connection with what had been going on, all at once
he said, "By-the-bye, Taylor, is not your salary due again?" My emotion
may be imagined! I had to swallow two or three times before I could
answer. With my eye fixed on the pan and my back to the doctor, I told
him as quietly as I could that it was overdue some little time. How
thankful I felt at that moment! GOD surely had heard my prayer, and
caused him, in this time of my great need, to remember the salary
without any word or suggestion from me. He replied, "Oh, I am so sorry
you did not remind me! You know how busy I am; I wish I had thought of
it a little sooner, for only this afternoon I sent all the money I had
to the bank, otherwise I would pay you at once." It is impossible to
describe the revulsion of feeling caused by this unexpected statement. I
knew not what to do. Fortunately for me my pan boiled up, and I had a
good reason for rushing with it from the room. Glad indeed I was to get
away, and keep out of sight until after the doctor had returned to his
house, and most thankful that he had not perceived my emotion.
As soon as he was gone I had to seek my little sanctum, and pour out my
heart before the LORD for some time, before calmness--and more than
calmness--thankfulness, and joy were restored to me. I felt that GOD had
His own way, and was not going to fail me. I had sought to know His will
early in the day, and as far as I could judge had received guidance to
wait patiently; and now GOD was going to work for me in some other way.
That evening was spent, as my Saturday evenings usually were, in reading
the Word and preparing the subjects on which I expected to speak in the
various lodging-houses on the morrow. I waited, perhaps, a little longer
than usual. At last, about ten o'clock, there being no interruption of
any kind, I put on my overcoat, and was preparing to leave for home,
rather thankful to know that by that time I should have to let myself in
with the latch-key, as my landlady retired early to rest. There was
certainly no help for that night; but perhaps GOD would interpose for me
by Monday, and I might be able to pay my landlady early in the week the
money I would have given her before, had it been possible.
Just as I was preparing to turn down the gas, I heard the doctor's step
in the garden which lay between the dwelling-house and surgery. He was
laughing to himself very heartily, as though greatly amused by
something. Entering the surgery, he asked for the ledger, and told me
that, strange to say, one of his richest patients had just come to pay
his doctor's bill--was it not an odd thing to do? It never struck me
that it might have any bearing on my own particular case, or I might
have felt embarrassed; but looking at it simply from the position of an
uninterested spectator, I also was highly amused that a man who was
rolling in wealth should come after ten o'clock at night to pay a
doctor's bill, which he could any day have met by a cheque with the
greatest ease. It appeared that somehow or other he could not rest with
this on his mind, and had been constrained to come at that unusual hour
to discharge his liability.
The account was duly receipted in the ledger, and the doctor was about
to leave, when suddenly he turned, and handing me some of the bank notes
just received, said, to my surprise and thankfulness, "By the way,
Taylor, you might as well take these notes; I have not any change, but
can give you the balance next week." Again I was left--my feelings
undiscovered--to go back to my own little closet and praise the LORD
with a joyful heart that after all I might go to China.
To me this incident was not a trivial one; and to recall it sometimes,
in circumstances of great difficulty, in China or elsewhere, has proved
no small comfort and strength.
By-and-by the time drew near when it was thought desirable that I should
leave Hull to attend the medical course of the London Hospital. A little
while spent there, and then I had every reason to believe that my
life-work in China would commence. But much as I had rejoiced at the
willingness of GOD to hear and answer prayer and to help His
half-trusting, half-timid child, I felt that I could not go to China
without having still further developed and tested my power to rest upon
His faithfulness; and a marked opportunity for doing so was
providentially afforded me.
My dear father had offered to bear all the expense of my stay in London.
I knew, however, that, owing to recent losses, it would mean a
considerable sacrifice for him to undertake this just when it seemed
necessary for me to go forward. I had recently become acquainted with
the Committee of the Chinese Evangelisation Society, in connection with
which I ultimately left for China, and especially with its secretary, my
esteemed and much-loved friend Mr. George Pearse, then of the Stock
Exchange, but now[1] and for many years himself a missionary. Not
knowing of my father's proposition, the Committee also kindly offered to
bear my expenses while in London. When these proposals were first made
to me, I was not quite clear as to what I ought to do, and in writing to
my father and the secretaries, told them that I would take a few days to
pray about the matter before deciding any course of action. I mentioned
to my father that I had had this offer from the Society, and told the
secretaries also of his proffered aid.
Subsequently, while waiting upon GOD in prayer for guidance, it became
clear to my mind that I could without difficulty decline both offers.
The secretaries of the Society would not know that I had cast myself
wholly on GOD for supplies, and my father would conclude that I had
accepted the other offer. I therefore wrote declining both propositions,
and felt that without any one having either care or anxiety on my
account I was simply in the hands of GOD, and that He, who knew my
heart, if He wished to encourage me to go to China, would bless my
effort to depend upon Him alone at home.
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FOOTNOTE:
[1] Since the above was written Mr. George Pearse has died.