THE WILDERNESS
The Governor's barge swept down the rolling flood of the Mississippi,
impelled by the blades of ten sturdy oarsmen. Little by little the
blue smoke of St. Louis town faded beyond the level of the forest. The
stone tower of the old Spanish stockade, where floated the American
flag, disappeared finally.
Meriwether Lewis sat staring back, but seeming not to note what
passed. He did not even notice a long bateau which left the wharf just
before his own and preceded him down the river, now loafing along
aimlessly, sometimes ahead, sometimes behind that of the Governor and
his party. In time he turned to his lap-desk and began his endless
task of writing, examining, revising. Now and again he muttered to
himself. The fever was indeed in his blood!
They proceeded thus, after the usual fashion of boat travel in those
days, down the great river, until they had passed the mouth of the
Ohio and reached what was known as the Chickasaw Bluffs, below the
confluence of the two streams. Here was a little post of the army,
arranged for the commander, Major Neely, Indian agent at that point.
As was the custom, all barges tied up here; and the Governor's craft
moored at the foot of the bluff. Its chief passenger was so weak that
he hardly could walk up the steep steps cut in the muddy front of the
bank.
"Governor Lewis!" exclaimed Major Neely, as he met him. "You are ill!
You are in an ague!"
"Perhaps, perhaps. Give me rest here for a day or two, if you please.
Then I fancy I shall be strong enough to travel East. See if you can
get horses for myself and my party--I am resolved not to go by sea. I
have not time."
The Governor of Louisiana, haggard, flushed with fever, staggered as
he followed his friend into the apartment assigned to him in one of
the cabins of the little post. He wore his usual traveling-garb; but
now, for some strange reason he seemed to lack his usual immaculate
neatness. Instead of the formal dress of his office, he wore an old,
stained, faded uniform coat, its pocket bulging with papers. This he
kept at the head of his bed when at length he flung himself down,
almost in the delirium of fever.
He lay here for two days, restless, sleepless. But at length, having
in the mean time scarcely tasted food, he rose and declared that he
must go on.
"Major," said he, "I can ride now. Have you horses for the journey?"
"Are you sure, Governor, that your strength is sufficient?" Neely
hesitated as he looked at the wasted form before him, at the hollow
eye, the fevered face.
"It is not a question of my personal convenience, Major," said
Meriwether Lewis. "Time presses for me. I must go on!"
"At least you shall not go alone," said Major Neely. "You should have
some escort. Doubtless you have important papers?"
Meriwether Lewis nodded.
"My servant has arranged everything, I fancy. Can you get an extra man
or two? The Natchez Trace is none too safe."
That military road, as they both knew, was indeed no more than a horse
path cut through the trackless forest which lay across the States of
Mississippi, Tennessee and Kentucky. Its reputation was not good. Many
a trader passing north from New Orleans with coin, many a settler
passing west with packhorses and household effects, had disappeared on
this wilderness road, and left no sign. It was customary for parties
of any consequence to ride in companies of some force.
It was a considerable cavalcade, therefore, which presently set forth
from Chickasaw Bluffs on the long ride eastward to cross the
Alleghanies, which meant some days or weeks spent in the saddle.
Apprehension sat upon all, even as they started out. Their eyes rested
upon the wasted form of their leader, the delirium of whose fever
seemed still to hold him. He muttered to himself as he rode, resented
the near approach of any traveling companion, demanded to be alone.
They looked at him in silence.
"He talks to himself all the time," said one of the party--a new man,
hired by Neely at the army post. He rode with Peria now; and none but
Peria knew that he had come from the long barge which had clung to the
Governor's craft all the way down the river--and which, unknown to
Lewis himself, had tied up and waited at Chickasaw Bluffs. He was a
stranger to Neely and to all the others, but seemed ready enough to
take pay for service along the Trace, declaring that he himself was
intending to go that way. He was a man well dressed, apparently of
education and of some means. He rode armed.
"What is wrong with the Governor, think you?" inquired this man once
more of Peria, Lewis's servant.
"It is his way," shrugged Peria. "We leave him alone. His hand is
heavy when he is angry."
"He rides always with his rifle across his saddle?"
"Always, on the trail."
"Loaded, I presume--and his pistols?"
"You may well suppose that," said Peria.
"Oh, well," said the new member of the party, "'tis just as well to be
safe. I lifted his saddlebags and the desk, or trunk, whatever you
call it, that is on the pack horse yonder. Heavy, eh?"
"Naturally," grinned Peria.
They looked at one another. And thereafter the two, as was well noted,
conversed often and more intimately together as the journey
progressed.
"Now it's an odd thing about his coat," volunteered the stranger later
in that same day. "He always keeps it on--that ragged old uniform. Was
it a uniform, do you believe? Can't the Governor of the new Territory
wear a coat that shows his own quality? This one's a dozen years old,
you might say."
"He always wears it on the trail," said Peria. "At home he watches it
as if it held some treasure."
"Treasure?" The shifty eyes of the new man flashed in sudden interest.
"What treasure? Papers, perhaps--bills--documents--money? His pocket
bulges at the side. Something there--yes, eh?"
"Hush!" said Peria. "You do not know that man, the Governor. He has
the eye of a hawk, the ear of a fox--you can keep nothing from him. He
fears nothing in the world, and in his moods--you'd best leave him
alone. Don't let him suspect, or----" And Peria shook his head.
The cavalcade was well out into the wilderness east of the Mississippi
on that afternoon of October 8, in the year 1809. Stopping at the
wayside taverns which now and then were found, they had progressed
perhaps a hundred miles to the eastward. The day was drawing toward
its close when Peria rode up and announced that one or two of the
horses had strayed from the trail.
"I have told you to be more careful, Peria," expostulated Governor
Lewis. "There are articles on the packhorse which I need at night. Who
is this new man that is so careless? Why do you not keep the horses
up? Go, then, and get them. Major Neely, would you be so kind as to
join the men and assure them of bringing on the horses?"
"And what of you, Governor?"
"I shall go on ahead, if you please. Is there no house near by? You
know the trail. Perhaps we can get lodgings not far on."
"The first white man's house beyond here," answered Neely, "belongs to
an old man named Grinder. 'Tis no more than a few miles ahead. Suppose
we join you there?"
"Agreed," said Lewis, and setting spurs to his horse, he left them.
It was late in the evening when at length Meriwether Lewis reined up
in front of the somewhat unattractive Grinder homestead cabin,
squatted down alongside the Natchez Trace; a place where sometimes
hospitality of a sort was dispensed. It was an ordinary double cabin
that he saw, two cob-house apartments with a covered space between
such as might have been found anywhere for hundreds of miles on either
side of the Alleghanies at that time. At his call there appeared a
woman--Mrs. Grinder, she announced herself.
"Madam," he inquired, "could you entertain me and my party for the
night? I am alone at present, but my servants will soon be up. They
are on the trail in search of some horses which have strayed."
"My husband is not here," said the woman. "We are not well fixed, but
I reckon if we can stand it all the time, you can for a night. How
many air there in your party?"
"A half-dozen, with an extra horse or two."
"I reckon we can fix ye up. Light down and come in."
She was noting well her guest, and her shrewd eyes determined him to
be no common man. He had the bearing of a gentleman, the carriage of a
man used to command. Certain of his garments seemed to show wealth,
although she noted, when he stripped off his traveling-smock, that he
wore not a new coat, but an old one--very old, she would have said,
soiled, stained, faded. It looked as if it had once been part of a
uniform.
Her guest, whoever he was--and she neither knew nor asked, for the
wilderness tavern held no register, and few questions were asked or
answered--paid small attention to the woman. He carried his saddlebags
into the room pointed out to him, flung them down, and began to pace
up and down, sometimes talking to himself. The woman eyed him from
time to time as she went about her duties.
"Set up and eat," she said at last. "I reckon your men are not
coming."
"I thank you, Madam," said the stranger, with gentle courtesy. "Do not
let me trouble you too much. I have been ill of late, and do not as
yet experience much hunger."
Indeed, he scarcely tasted the food. He sat, as she noted, a long
time, gazing fixedly out of the door, over the forest, toward the
West.
"Is it not a beautiful world, Madam?" said he, after a time, in a
voice of great gentleness and charm. "I have seen the forest often
thus in the West in the evening, when the day was done. It is
wonderful!"
"Yes. Some of my folks is thinking of going out further into the
West."
He turned to her abstractedly, yet endeavoring to be courteous.
"A wonderful country, Madam!" said he; and so he fell again into his
moody staring out beyond the door.
After a time the hostess of the backwoods cabin sought to make up a
bed for him, but he motioned to her to desist.
"It is not necessary," said he. "I have slept so much in the open that
'tis rarely I use a bed at all. I see now that my servant has come up,
and is in the yard yonder. Tell him to bring my robes and blankets and
spread them here on the floor, as I always have them. That will answer
quite well enough, thank you."
Peria, it seemed, had by this time found his way to the cabin along
the trail. He was alone.
"Come, man!" said Lewis. "Make down my bed for me--I am ill. And tell
me, where is my powder? Where are the bullets for my pistols? I find
them empty. Haven't I told you to be more careful about these things?
And where is my rifle-powder? The canister is here, but 'tis empty.
Come, come, I must have better service than this!"
But even as he chided the remissness of his servant, he seemed to
forget the matter in his mind. Presently he was again pacing apart,
stopping now and then to stare out over the forest.
"I must have a place to write," said he at length. "I shall be awake
for a time tonight, occupied with business matters of importance.
Where is Major Neely? Where are the other men? Why have they not come
up?"
Peria could not or did not answer these questions, but sullenly went
about the business of making his master as comfortable as he might,
and then departed to his own quarters, down the hill, in another
building. The old backwoods woman herself withdrew to the other
apartment, beyond the open space of the double cabin.
The soft, velvet darkness of night in the forest now came on apace--a
night of silence. There was not even the call of a tree toad. The
voice of the whippoorwill was stilled at that season of the year. If
there were human beings awake, alert, at that time, they made no
sound. Meriwether Lewis was alone--alone in the wilderness again. Its
silences, its mysteries, drew about him.
But now he stood, not enjoying in his usual fashion the familiar
feeling of the night in the forest, the calm, the repose it
customarily brought to him. He stood looking intently, as if he
expected some one--nay, indeed, as if he saw some one--as if he saw a
face! What face was it?
At last he made his way across the room to the heavy saddle-case which
had been placed there. He flung the lid open, and felt among the
contents. It seemed to him there was not so much within the case as
there should have been. He missed certain papers, and resolved to ask
Peria about them. He could not find the little bags of coin which he
expected; but he found the watch, lying covered in a corner of the
case. He drew it out and, stepping toward the flickering candle,
opened it, gazing fixedly at the little silhouette cut round to fit in
the back of the case.
It was a face that he had seen before--a hundred times he had gazed
thus at it on the far Western trails.
He brought the little portrait close up to his eyes--but not close to
his lips. No, he did not kiss the face of the woman who once had
written to him:
You must not kiss my picture, because I am in your power.
Meriwether Lewis had won his long fight! He had mastered the human
emotions of his soul at last. The battle had been such that he sat
here now, weak and spent. He sat looking at the face which had meant
so much to him all these years.
There came into his mind some recollection of words that she had
written to him once--something about the sound of water. He lifted his
head and listened. Yes, there was a sound coming faintly through the
night--the trickle of a little brook in the ravine below the window.
Always, he recalled, she had spoken of the sound of water, saying that
that music would blot out memory--saying that water would wash out
secrets, would wash out sins. What was it she had said? What was it
she had written to him long ago? What did it mean--about the water?
The sound of the little brook came to his ears again in some shift of
the wind. He rose and stumbled toward the window, carrying the candle
in his hand. His haggard face was lighted by its flare as he stood
there, leaning out, listening.
It was then that his doom came to him.
There came the sound of a shot; a second; and yet another.
The woman in the cabin near by heard them clearly enough. She rose and
listened. There was no sound from the other cabins. The servants paid
no attention to the shots, if they had heard them--and why should they
not have heard them? No one called out, no one came running.
Frightened, the woman rose, and after a time stepped timidly across
the covered space between the two rooms, toward the light which she
saw shining faintly through the cracks of the door. She heard groans
within.
A tall and ghastly figure met her as she approached the door. She saw
his face, white and haggard and stained. From a wound in the forehead
a broad band of something dark fell across his cheek. From his throat
something dark was welling. He clutched a hand on his breast--and his
fingers were dark.
He was bleeding from three wounds; but still he stood and spoke to
her.
"In God's name, Madam," said he, "bring me water! I am killed!"
She ran away, she knew not where, calling to the others to come; but
they did not come. She was alone. Once more, forgetful of her errand,
incapable of rendering aid, she went back to the door.
She heard no sound. She flung open the door and peered into the room.
The candle was standing, broken and guttering, on the floor. She could
see the scattered belongings of the traveling-cases, empty now. The
occupant of the room was gone! In terror she fled once more, back to
her own room, and cowered in her bed.
Staggering, groping, his hands strained to him to hold in the life
that was passing, Meriwether Lewis had left the room where he had
received his wounds, and had stepped out into the air, into the night.
All the resolution of his soul was bent upon one purpose. He
staggered, but still stumbled onward.
It seemed to him that he heard the sound of water, and blindly,
unconsciously, he headed that way. He entered the shadow of the woods
and passed down the little slope of the hill. He fell, rather than
seated himself, at the side of the brook whose voice he had heard in
the night. He was alone. The wilderness was all about him--the
wilderness which had always called to him, and which now was to claim
him.
He sat, gasping, almost blind, feeling at his pockets. At last he
found it--one of the sulphur matches made for him by good old Dr.
Saugrain. Tremblingly he essayed to light it, and at last he saw the
flare.
With skill of custom, though now almost unconsciously, his fingers
felt for dry bits of bark and leaves, little twigs. Yes, the match
served its purpose. A tiny flame flickered between his feet as he sat.
Did any eye see Meriwether Lewis as he sat there in the dark at his
last camp fire? Did any guilty eye look on him making his last fight?
He sat alone by the little fire. His hand, dropping sometimes,
responsive only to the supreme effort of his will, fumbled in the
bosom of his old coat. There were some papers there--some things which
no other eyes than his must ever see! Here was a secret--it must
always be a secret--her secret and his! He would hide forever from the
world what had been theirs in common.
The tiny flame rose up more strongly, twice, thrice, five times--six
times in all! One by one he had placed them on the flames--these
letters that he had carried on his heart for years--the six letters
that she had written him when he was far away in the unknown. He held
the last one long, trying to see the words. He groaned. He was almost
blind. His trembling finger found the last word of the last letter. It
rose before him in tall characters now, all done in flame and not in
block--_Theodosia!_
Now they were gone! No one could ever see them. No one could know how
he had treasured them all these years. She was safe!
Before his soul, in the time of his great accounting, there rose the
passing picture of the years. Free from suffering, now absolved,
resigned, he was a boy once more, and all the world was young. He saw
again the slopes of old Albemarle, beautiful in the green and gold of
an early autumn day in old Virginia. He heard again his mother's
voice. What was it that she said? He bent his head as if to listen.
"Your wish--your great desire--your hope--your dream--all these shall
be yours at last, even though the trail be long, even though the
burden be too heavy to carry farther."
So then she had known--she had spoken the truth in her soothsaying
that day so long ago! Now his fading eye looked about him, and he
nodded his head weakly, as if to assent to something he had heard.
He had so earnestly longed--he had so greatly desired--to be an
honorable man! He had so longed and desired to do somewhat for others
than himself! And here was peace, here indeed was conquest. His great
desire was won!
His lax hands dropped between his knees as he sat. A little gust of
wind sweeping down the gully caught up some of the white
ashes--stained as they were with blood that dropped from his veins as
he bent above them--carried them down upon the tiny thread of the
little brook. It carried them away toward the sea--his blood, the
ashes, the secret which they hid.
At length he rose once more, his splendid will still forcing his
broken body to do its bidding. Half crawling up the bank, once more he
stood erect and staggered back across the yard, into the room. The
woman heard him there again. Pity arose in her breast; once more she
mastered her terror and approached the door.
"In God's name, Madam," said he, "bring me water--wine! I am so
strong, I am hard to die! Bind up my wounds--I have work to do! Heal
me these wounds!"
But not her power nor any power could heal such wounds as his. Once
more she called out for aid, and none came.
The night wore away. The dying man lay on his bearskin pallet on the
floor, motionless now and silent, but still breathing, and calm at
last. It was dawn when the recreant servant found him there.
"Peria," said Meriwether Lewis, turning his fading eye on the man, "do
not fear me. I will not hurt you. But my watch--I cannot find it--it
seems gone. I am hard to die, it seems. But the little watch--it
had--a--picture--Ah!"