"I am but a _Gatherer_ and disposer of other men's stuff."--_Wotton_.
The projector of one of the new canals, accompanied by two or three
friends, was superintending the operations of the workmen, and frequently
lamented the loss which the speculation was likely to occasion to him. He
was mounted on horseback at the time, when the animal, suddenly becoming
unruly, plunged, and threw his rider into the water. Being quickly rescued
from his disagreeable situation, and safely landed on the bank, one of his
companions begged to congratulate him on the happy change that had taken
place in his fortune, "for have I not often told you (said the wit) that
the canal would one day _fill your pockets_?"
* * * * *
A cube of gold, of little more than five inches on each side, contains the
value of 10,000_l_. sterling.
* * * * *
"There is a rich rector in Worcestershire," said one of the colonel's
guests, "whose name I cannot now recollect, but who has not preached for
the last twelve months, as he every Sunday requests one of the
neighbouring clergy to officiate for him."--"Oh!" replied Colonel Landleg,
"though you cannot recollect his name, I can; it is England--_England
expects every man to do his duty_."
* * * * *
The church-bells at Lima are very musical, the brass of which they are
composed having a considerable quantity of silver mixed with it; but they
are rung in the most discordant manner. Instead of being pulled in chimes,
as in England, thongs of leather are fixed to the clappers, and at the
appointed times boys ascend the belfry, and swing the tongues of all the
bells at once, from one side to another, producing the most barbarous
combination of sounds imaginable. A friar who had been in England
observed, that the English had very good bells if they knew but how to
ring.
* * * * *
A laborious special pleader, being constantly annoyed by the mewing of his
favourite cat, at length resolved to get rid of it. He accordingly told
his clerk to take and place it where it might remain in safety, but still
where it could never get out. The clerk instantly walked off with poor
puss in his lawyer's bag. On his return, being asked by his employer
whether the noisy animal had been so disposed of that it could not come
back to interrupt him, the cat carrier duly answered, "Certainly, I have
put him where he cannot get out--in the Court of Chancery."--_Reynolds'
Life_.