CHAPTER XIV

THE ANCIENT FLAME

So Oman took up his abode in the palace; nor were the circumstances

of his settling there very surprising to himself. From the first it

had seemed as if, in the natural course of things, this should become

his home; and the new duties and new habits of life were acquired

mechanically. His intuition of the link that bound him to the past,

however, though at times it was strong on him, proved evanescent; so

that there were weeks when he lived wholly in the passing hour, without

any memories of bygone days. But he knew that Fate had been kind to

him. He was wrapped in impenetrable serenity: the outcome, the reward,

of his years of solitude; and he felt that no mischance could disturb

this again.

On the first morning after his arrival, the Rajah himself introduced

him to the palace school, held in that room which, in the old Rajah’s

day, had been a theatre:—the place where the slave Fidá had first

looked upon poppy-crowned Ahalya. Whatever its former glories, this

room, on the morning that Oman first beheld it, presented a pleasanter

picture. Save for a great rug upon the floor, and the teacher’s cushion

on a daïs at one end of the room, the place was quite unfurnished. On

the floor sat an orderly company of young men, between the ages of

fifteen and twenty: all of them clad in white, with scarlet sashes

around their waists, and red shoes on their otherwise bare feet. These

youths were engaged in a variety of occupations: some of them studying

manuscripts of various kinds, many simply sitting in meditation,

still others indulging, rather surreptitiously, in games. Among them,

without any distinction as to dress or position, was Bhavani’s son,

Viradha, the heir of Mandu: a pleasant-faced youth, but not remarkable

for any special wit or wisdom; for he had inherited the disposition

of his grandfather, and was fonder of the chase and the table than of

reflection on the doctrine of atoms[9] or the working of the primordial

soul.

[9] The foundation of the Nyaya system, originated by Kanada.

Up to to-day, the palace school had been conducted on a very irregular

plan, Bhavani bringing various men of wisdom or holiness to lecture

one or two days a week, the rest of the time being occupied with

indiscriminate reading from philosophic or poetical manuscripts.

On this day, as soon as the youths had assembled, Bhavani and Oman

made their appearance together. The Rajah offered a few words of

introduction and explanation: setting forth the fact that at last they

were to have a permanent master, who would reduce their hours of study

to some sort of system and order. During his speech, every eye in the

room was fixed upon Oman’s tall, gaunt figure, clad in white garments,

his serene face, with its deep-set eyes, and his broad, lined brow, on

each side of which fell masses of thick, black hair. At the end of the

introduction Oman came forward a little and the young men advanced to

him, and, one by one, kissed his hand. Then they returned, expectantly,

to their places; and Bhavani, able to spare no more time from matters

of state, hurried away, leaving Oman to his new task.

It was the most difficult morning that Oman had ever spent. He had had

no preparation for his situation, no time to arrange a course of work.

Hitherto he had preached in small towns, to mere handfuls of uneducated

men and women. Now he stood before a critical assembly of young

noblemen, all of whom had had considerable instruction in abstract

thinking and reasoning: far more, no doubt, than he himself had ever

known. That he impressed them all, immediately, as a man of dignity and

wisdom, of wide knowledge of men and high purity of mind, was again

probably due to his years of miracle-working solitude.

To his own keen satisfaction, Oman felt that he had begun well with

his school; and he determined, in his heart, that the end should be

better still. For a month or more, then, he was invisible to every one

save his pupils. He found that a full and detailed exposition of his

creed to thinking and sometimes sceptical men, demanded a new labor of

thought, a new working out of little things that had hitherto been mere

suggestions in his own mind; the rejection of some ideas that proved

themselves impossible; and the admission of others that he had not

hitherto acknowledged. This work, while difficult, gave him the keenest

delight; for the breadth and fulness of his logic was coming home to

him; and he perceived that this creation of his brain was no puny

shadow, but a thing finely formed, capable of proper development. He,

the seeker after Truth, had found it; and from the heights was bringing

it to men. It was its own greatest reward.

At the end of six weeks, his labors began to be less exacting. He had

reduced his own thinking to a system; and he now began to introduce

other studies than philosophy into this school, where arithmetic of

the simplest kind, and writing in any living language, were considered

not as necessaries but as arts. Oman found time now to see something

of the palace and of its Rajah, who eagerly sought his society. A few

days wrought great changes in his quiet existence; and presently an

incident, entirely unexpected, brought him a revelation which, for some

time to come, eclipsed every other interest in his mind.

During the six weeks of close work, the circumstances attendant on his

first meeting with Bhavani had slipped from Oman’s mind. He no longer

thought of the scene by the parapet behind the water-palace, or of

Zenaide, the woman with wonderful hair. But now, in mid-May, she was

recalled to him. One noon, as he sat in his room meditating through the

hot hours, a slave-boy broke in upon him and delivered to him a message

to the effect that the lady Zenaide desired the presence of Oman the

sage, that she might hear the creed he taught.

Oman, taken by surprise, had an impulse to refuse the request. A

moment’s reflection, however, changed his mind. She had asked for

his creed. Believing as he did, he had no right to refuse her the

knowledge. Besides, was she not under the special protection of

Bhavani? Bhavani was his patron, nay, his friend. Whom Bhavani loved,

Oman would not deny. So he sent an answer by the little slave that he

would come that day; and the child departed, leaving him in chaos.

Oman spent the next two hours in the greatest confusion of mind. Never

in his life had he been brought into contact with such a woman as he

knew this one to be:—such a woman as the great Indian romances love to

concern themselves with. He thought of the incident of the Buddha’s

entertainment by the woman of Vesali, the beloved of Ajuta-Satra, and

of her conversion to the faith. Had the Sakyamuni found danger in her

presence? Was her hair of golden red? And then, suddenly, Oman started

up, resolutely turning his mind to other things. Hurriedly he bathed

and clothed himself in a fresh gown of white linen, girt himself with

a broad, yellow sash, and wound a white turban around his head. Then,

without pause, he set out for the water-palace.

The afternoon was late, and the shadows lay long and golden across the

road. Full summer was already on the land, and Mandu was a riot of

verdure. Oman’s mood responded easily to the scene. Under the spell of

the surrounding beauty, his thoughts grew lighter, till, when he paused

before the open doors of the waterpalace, he no longer looked like an

ascetic. The sombre fires in his eyes had brightened, and his face was

softened with a smile.

In the curtained doorway stood a tall slave, clad in rich livery, who

addressed Oman with an air of profound respect, and at once made way

for him to pass within. Oman found himself following the slave across

a broad, square hall, in the centre of which was a marble tank filled

with clear water; and thence they proceeded to the end of a short

corridor, where, before another curtained doorway, Oman was left alone.

After a moment’s hesitation he lifted the curtain, and crossed the

threshold. He was facing a long, narrow room, stone-paved, lighted

from the top, the walls hung with embroidered silks of delicate hues.

There was an air of unusual lightness and airiness about the whole

place; and Oman’s eyes wandered for some seconds before he perceived

that, at the far end of the room, in front of a long, amber-colored

divan, half hidden by a screen, stood Zenaide. Oman uttered a short

exclamation, and started forward, observing, as he approached her,

that there was no smile on her lips. His eyes estimated her again; and

they found much that was new. She was clad to-day in a long garment of

silvery green, that showed her more slender than he had thought. She

was also paler. Her hair was woven into a crown upon her head, but was

without ornament; and in her dark eyes there was no expression of the

voluptuary. Oman found himself newly puzzled as he seated himself, at

her bidding, on the divan, while she sank upon a low pile of cushions

on the floor. They had not yet spoken when a slave entered, with a

tray of sherbets and sweetmeats which Oman refused, and Zenaide, not

pressing him, herself waved away. When they were alone again, she rose,

impulsively, ran down the room, and lowered a double hanging before

the door. Then she turned, slowly, facing Oman, who was watching her.

For some moments she neither advanced nor spoke. Oman perceived that

she was in a state of repressed agitation, for her fingers twined and

intertwined, and her clinging garments betrayed a nervous quivering of

her body. It seemed as if it were impossible for her to speak; yet, as

Oman did not help her, she had, perforce, to make a beginning. She had

examined him minutely, face and figure, before she exclaimed, abruptly:

“Art thou indeed as learned as they tell me, O sage?”

Oman’s expression changed. “Not in thy lore,” he answered.

“My lore? And what is that?”

“Art thou not a woman? Thy lore is love.”

“Ah!” The expression escaped involuntarily. It was a betrayal.

“Ah!” echoed Oman. “It was for that you sent for me! Know, then, that I

am not a faquir, not a mag—”

“No, no!” Reading the scorn in his tone, she came forward swiftly

and sank down in the cushions at his feet. “Think not that of me. I

know something of thy creed. Bhavani has expounded it to me. I have

considered it, carefully. But it is very pitiless. Thinkest thou not it

is pitiless to the weak? Wouldst thou leave no sweetness in life?” Her

eyes lifted themselves to him searchingly, and he felt the spell of her

magnetism.

Shaking himself free from the impression, he looked down upon her with

a quizzical calmness that disconcerted her. “What wouldst thou of me,

Zenaide?” he asked.

Again, overcome by her nervousness, she rose and began to pace up and

down before him. “Nothing.—Nothing,” she answered; but her words did

not indicate a pause. For a moment or two she walked, but finally faced

him, frankly. “Is love—true love—so ignoble, then?”

Oman, taken aback, did not immediately answer. Then, many memories

overcoming him, he cried out painfully: “Unless it be lawful, yes.

Surely yes!”

“Lawful! Love hath no law save itself.”

Oman’s lip curled. “Doubtless thou knowest more of it than I. Wherein

am I to help thee? Hast thou left this love of thine? Return, then, to

the land where he dwells.”

Zenaide listened, and a far-away look came into her eyes. She was

standing now with her back against a stone pillar, and, as she began to

speak, Oman felt himself gradually fascinated by the perfection of her

beauty and by the abandon of her manner, which, in the beginning, had

been held in restraint, but grew more and more impassioned as, carried

out of herself by her own emotion, she forgot everything but her theme.

“The land of my love—lies here, Oman. I came out of the east,

seeking love, journeying through broad countries. To many I brought

happiness, but I found it never for myself. Then came I to Mandu. And

here, in a breath, I knew that it awaited me. My soul was lighted

as by a torch; and I am still consumed by its increasing flame.

I love. And him I love rejects me. I, the priestess of love, am

unloved! Am I so ugly?—so old?—so young?—so ignorant? Am I surpassed

by another? I, Zenaide, consumed with fire and tears, pour out all

my wealth on him, and he knows it not. Daily he looks on my face,

hears my voice, reads mine eyes, and still I am not known. Oh, my

beloved—adorable—transcendent—Bhavani—”

She stopped short. Her passion had carried her beyond herself. She had

more than betrayed, she had proclaimed, her secret. But now, suddenly

brought back to consequences, all her force died, and she stood

trembling, fearful, before Oman, whose face was stern and angry. There

was silence for a long, pulsating moment, while Zenaide realized that

the teacher of men had become her judge. Oman, indeed, felt his anger

growing within him, and presently gave it voice:

“Hast thou dared to defile the purest of men with thy love? Hast

thou known him, lived near him for more than two years, seen all the

strength of his white soul, and still dreamed he could so dishonor

himself and thee? Shame to thee! Thou hast, moreover, sullied him in

the eyes of his people; for many say what is false, that he yielded

long ago to thine eyes and thy red-dyed hair. He has housed thee like a

queen. He has paid thee greater honor than if, indeed, he loved thee.

Shame, then, woman, for thy thoughts! Shame to thee!—What—thou weepest!”

For Zenaide, sinking slowly to her knees, bent her head upon her hands,

and Oman saw two or three bright tears run through her fingers and fall

to the floor. Her frame was shaken and convulsed with ill-restrained

sobs. After gazing at her for a moment, Oman, unable to judge of the

sincerity of her pose, went on more quietly:

“Thou hast confessed to love the ruler of his people, a man standing in

the eyes of men for all that is upright—more than upright. And now thou

callest upon me, his servant, a lover of truth, to condone thy sin. How

couldst thou think thus of me?”

“No—no! Listen! Not to condone—” she lifted her head, and he perceived

that her face was stained and distorted with real grief. “Not to

condone. I sent for thee because, despairing—” she gave a little

convulsive sob—“despairing of bringing his love to me, I long to cure

myself of the malady. Thou art wise. I wish to learn wisdom of thee.

Thou art good. So I also would be. Bha—Bhavani has sought to teach me

wisdom, to teach me strength. But I—could never learn but love from

him. O stern—O wise one—cast me not away! Help me, and I will honor

thee all my days!”

Her pleading was eloquent because it was sincere. Her voice was not

smooth. The words were forced out like sobs; and in them Oman read

the struggle she had endured before she sent for him. Her abandon

showed this, indeed; for, had he not been her final hope, she would

never have laid her soul bare before him in her stress. And seeing all

these things, his anger was softened, and he was moved to some sort

of feeling, less pity than sympathy. Kneeling beside her as she still

crouched upon the floor, he soothed her a little, and raised her up,

and led her, unresisting, to the divan, where he caused her to sit

down. Then, himself taking her former place upon the cushions, he began

to talk. His voice was low and smooth, and flowed along monotonously.

At first he cared not so much what he said, as that his manner should

quiet her. In this he succeeded. And when he saw her, forgetful of

her tears, sit up and lean forward, listening to him, he took up a

text on which he had never spoken before—on which he had scarcely

permitted himself to meditate, yet concerning which all knowledge

seemed to be stored away in his heart and brain. It was the ceaseless,

rebellious yearning of woman for man, of man for woman: that insistent,

unreasoning desire that has caused chaos in the world. Of himself and

his own abnormal struggles, he did not speak. But it was from them that

he drew his words:—the words that Zenaide knew to be expressive of

universal truth. For some time Oman talked broadly on this theme; and

then, waiving generalities, he continued:

“And it is thus that you have suffered in your soul, desiring for a

companion the noblest of men. But, because you would match your heart

with such as him, so you must become his equal, worthy of him. Let

his own nobility illumine you. It is unlawful, in the light of the

higher law, that you two should love. Show yourself his peer, then, in

quenching this desire, and, dwelling near his brain, seek not to unlock

the chamber of his heart. Let it not be said that, through you, his

high nature has been weakened and defiled.

“Nay—speak not yet. I see it in your eyes—how cold my words are to you;

how hard. It is true that I feel within me no fire burning. I know

little of that restless pain. But, hearing many speak of it, I believe

in it; and yet, above, see plainly the great Dharma shining. Receive,

then, the truth. Be not defeated in your struggle. Go your way knowing

that the blessing of Brahma is upon you for your keeping of the law.”

“But, in the end, what reward shall there be for this, my sacrifice?

What in the wide world could repay me for the delight of one hour—of

one moment, in the strength of his arms?”

“The reward is great:—greater, indeed, than any that receive it not can

fathom. It comes in the earthly Nirvâna, the high, conscious strength,

the calm, the tranquillity, that permeates the soul as water permeates

and renews a parched and dying plant. With this peace comes the death

of yearning and desire. The pursuits of man and the objects of his

struggles—love, power, wealth, fame—these are little to those that

feel their futility. And I assert this not as the Dharma, nor as what

has been told me; but I speak of what I know. For, Zenaide, that same

reward is mine. Many years I labored for it, fighting such battles

as you could scarcely understand. But in the end it came;—the great

Relief; and, knowing that at last I should be safe to dwell among men,

I returned to them, and shall remain among them till my death. The

reward is always with me. It cannot leave me now.”

“But—” Zenaide sat studying him, his seamed face, his deep-set eyes,

his black hair, shaded here and there with a thread of white; and when

she spoke, there was a pathetic childishness in her tone: “But thou art

old. Thou hast seen life. Desire dies out of the hearts of the aged.”

Oman shook his head. “I am not an old man. I was not twenty years old

when I went up into the mountains. I dwelt there for many years; but

still I am not more than five and thirty. I am younger than Bhavani,”

he added, thoughtfully.

To this the woman made no reply. Oman had expended all his comfort; and

now he sat waiting for her to speak again. She remained quiet, however,

her chin resting on her clasped hands, her elbows on her knees, her

face thrust a little forward. Her brow was contracted, and she seemed

to be thinking, deeply. Her cheeks bore the marks of tears. Her hair

and dress were disarranged. But she was oblivious of her appearance.

Oman sat studying her, and did not realize how long the silence had

lasted when, without changing her attitude, she said slowly:

“It is a creed for men, only for men, that you preach, O sage. It is

cold. It is hard. It is relentless. What need have I of tranquillity

and calm? I am a woman of red blood. Preach you to me resistance of

the emotions? Think you that bloodlessness, quietude, loneliness seem

beautiful to me?—Ah, yes—it is true! It is true! He is like that, and

I wish to be like him. I will be like him, Oman Ramasarman! I will, I

will—dost hear? I will!”

“What is it that thou wilt, Zenaide?”

Oman and the woman sprang to their feet, as Bhavani walked quietly into

the room.

“My lord!” cried Zenaide, faintly; and Oman went hastily forward, with

an irrelevant remark which Bhavani answered, wondering. While this was

in progress, Zenaide’s hands were busy with her hair, with her face,

with her dress; and presently she approached, mistress of herself

again, so quiet, so self-contained, that Oman could only marvel at her

power.

Bhavani did not stay long, nor would he permit Oman to depart before

him, however much Zenaide wished it. He seated himself beside the

woman, and talked with her about one or two personal matters; while

Oman, standing apart, covertly watched the two. He tried hard to

discover in Zenaide some sign of the feeling she had so lately

displayed. But, search as he would, he could find nothing in her

bearing that remotely suggested her true state. If she was always thus

with Bhavani, there was surely little to fear. From her the hermit’s

eyes moved to the Rajah. He was talking as he would have talked to a

man whose friendship he valued. Seeing them both thus, Oman took heart.

Surely an unlawful emotion could not be very strong in either heart.

It was after sunset when Bhavani rose to go; and he and Oman took leave

together, Zenaide begging Oman, in an undertone, to come again to

her that she might talk with him further. Oman promised readily; and

then, arm in arm, he and the Rajah set out into the starry half-light.

As they left the water-palace behind them, there fell on both an

unexpected silence:—such a silence as, coming from the mind and will

of one, is not to be broken by his companion. It settled over Oman

oppressively; for where Bhavani was concerned, he was quick to feel the

slightest change in mood. Encompassed by uneasiness, they moved on in

the evening light, and Oman perceived that Bhavani’s steps lagged. It

was as if he loitered to get courage to speak. Oman had a sense that

some revelation was pending; but instinct told him that he might not

question, might not make the slightest advance toward confidence. They

proceeded till they were within a few yards of the palace, and Oman

began to think his feeling a mistake, when suddenly Bhavani halted,

and, turning to his companion till, even in the dim light, Oman could

see how drawn and pale was his face, he said, in a muffled voice:

“Zenaide sent for thee to-day?”

“Yes.”

“And wherefore? Wherefore? What did she want of thee?”

For the shadow of an instant Oman hesitated. Then he answered, quietly:

“She had heard that I taught a new creed. She desired to hear it.”

“Is that all?” The words shot from Bhavani’s lips.

“That is all,” was the tranquil rejoinder.

Bhavani found no reply to this, yet he did not move on. Oman stood

waiting, with fear in his heart. He heard Bhavani say, in a voice that

was monotonous with repression: “She had been weeping. I could see it.

She had wept.” Then, all at once, he flung both arms over his head,

and cried out, in a voice deep with long-endured anguish: “How long,

O Brahma! How long? My strength fails me at last. I can endure it no

more. I shall fall—I shall fall!”

“Wherefore?” murmured Oman, at his shoulder.

“Can you not see? Do you not perceive?” whispered Bhavani, hoarsely. “I

love her. I love her, Oman. I love Zenaide.”

Then Oman began to laugh. He laughed till Bhavani, seizing him by the

shoulder, shook him like a rat, crying to him the while to speak. And

Oman obeyed him, saying, in a tone of bitter mockery: “Thou lovest her,

Bhavani, thou, Rajah of Mandu! Thou lovest her whose heart has been

given in turn to half a hundred; who loves thee to-day for thy gold,

who will love me to-morrow for my creed: _Thou_, son of Rajahs,

stoop to _such_?” And again he laughed.

Bhavani straightened up, and his face grew hard and set. “Ah, thou

speakest well. It is folly indeed to talk to thee of love. But have no

fear. I am Bhavani, a prince, the son of princes. I have not stooped,

nor shall I.”

With that speech his expression was not pleasant to look upon. But

Oman felt a sudden relief. He had won a battle in behalf of the law.

Yet, a few moments later, as he shut himself into his room, he felt a

new confusion and a new bitterness in his heart; and he repeated over

and over to himself these words: “And these—and these—the greatest

and the best, know still the struggle, still faint before it, still

call on high for the Reason that never comes. Was it so wonderful that

I—we—failed?”

The flame-gatherers · 第 14 / 18 章