Once upon a time there was a king who was the wisest in all of the
world. So wise was he that no one had ever befooled him, which is a rare
thing, I can tell you. Now, this king had a daughter who was as pretty
as a ripe apple, so that there was no end to the number of the lads who
came asking to marry her. Every day there were two or three of them
dawdling around the house, so that at last the old king grew tired of
having them always about.
So he sent word far and near that whoever should befool him might have
the princess and half of the kingdom to boot, for he thought that it
would be a wise man indeed who could trick him. But the king also said,
that whoever should try to befool him and should fail, should have a
good whipping. This was to keep all foolish fellows away.
The princess was so pretty that there was no lack of lads who came to
have a try for her and half of the kingdom, but every one of these went
away with a sore back and no luck.
Now, there was a man who was well off in the world, and who had three
sons; the first was named Peter, and the second was named Paul. Peter
and Paul thought themselves as wise as anybody in all of the world, and
their father thought as they did.
As for the youngest son, he was named Boots. Nobody thought anything of
him except that he was silly, for he did nothing but sit poking in the
warm ashes all of the day.
One morning Peter spoke up and said that he was going to the town to
have a try at befooling the king, for it would be a fine thing to have a
princess in the family. His father did not say no, for if anybody was
wise enough to befool the king, Peter was the lad.
So, after Peter had eaten a good breakfast, off he set for the town,
right foot foremost. After a while he came to the king’s house and—rap!
tap! tap!—he knocked at the door.
Well; what did he want?
Oh! he would only like to have a try at befooling the king.
Very good; he should have his try. He was not the first one who had been
there that morning, early as it was.
So Peter was shown in to the king.
“Oh, look!” said he, “yonder are three black geese out in the
court-yard”
But no, the king was not to be fooled so easily as all that. “One goose
is enough to look at at a time,” said he; “take him away and give him a
whipping!”
And so they did, and Peter went home bleating like a sheep.
One day Paul spoke up. “I should like to go and have a try for the
princess, too,” said he.
Well, his father did not say no, for, after all, Paul was the more
clever of the two.
So off Paul went as merrily as a duck in the rain. By and by he came to
the castle, and then he too was brought before the king just as Peter
had been.
“Oh, look!” said he, “yonder is a crow sitting in the tree with three
white stripes on his back!”
But the king was not so silly as to be fooled in that way. “Here is a
Jack,” said he, “who will soon have more stripes on his back than he
will like. Take him away and give him his whipping!”
Then it was done as the king had said, and Paul went away home bawling
like a calf.
One day up spoke Boots. “I should like to go and have a try for the
pretty princess, too,” said he.
[Illustration: Peter goes to the castle to befool the king, dressed in
his finest clothes.]
At this they all stared and sniggered. What! he go where his clever
brothers had failed, and had nothing to show for the trying but a good
beating? What had come over the lout! Here was a pretty business, to be
sure! That was what they all said.
But all of this rolled away from Boots like water from a duck’s back. No
matter, he would like to go and have a try like the others. So he begged
and begged until his father was glad to let him go to be rid of his
teasing, if nothing else.
Then Boots asked if he might have the old tattered hat that hung back of
the chimney.
Oh, yes, he might have that if he wanted it, for nobody with good wits
was likely to wear such a thing.
So Boots took the hat, and after he had brushed the ashes from his shoes
set off for the town, whistling as he went.
The first body whom he met was an old woman with a great load of
earthenware pots and crocks on her shoulders.
“Good-day, mother,” said Boots.
“Good-day, son,” said she.
“What will you take for all of your pots and crocks?” said Boots.
“Three shillings,” said she.
“I will give you five shillings if you will come and stand in front of
the king’s house, and do thus and so when I say this and that,” said
Boots.
Oh, yes! she would do that willingly enough.
So Boots and the old woman went on together, and presently came to the
king’s house. When they had come there, Boots sat down in front of the
door and began bawling as loud as he could—“No, I will not! I will not
do it, I say! No, I will not do it!”
So he kept on, bawling louder and louder until he made such a noise
that, at last, the king himself came out to see what all of the hubbub
was about. But when Boots saw him he only bawled out louder than ever,
“No, I will not! I will not do it, I say!”
“Stop! stop!” cried the king, “what is all this about?”
“Why,” said Boots, “everybody wants to buy my cap, but I will not sell
it! I will not do it, I say!”
“But, why should anybody want to buy such a cap as that?” said the king.
“Because,” said Boots, “it is a fooling cap and the only one in all of
the world.”
[Illustration: Paul comes home again from the king’s castle with no
luck. ¶]
“A fooling cap!” said the king. For he did not like to hear of such a
cap as that coming into the town. “Hum-m-m-m! I should like to see you
fool somebody with it. Could you fool that old body yonder with the pots
and the crocks?”
“Oh, yes! that is easily enough done,” said Boots, and without more ado
he took off his tattered cap and blew into it. Then he put it on his
head again and bawled out, “Break pots! break pots!”
No sooner had he spoken these words than the old woman jumped up and
began breaking and smashing her pots and crocks as though she had gone
crazy. That was what Boots had paid her five shillings for doing, but of
it the king knew nothing. “Hui!” said he to himself, “I must buy that
hat from the fellow or he will fool the princess away from me for sure
and certain.” Then he began talking to Boots as sweetly as though he had
honey in his mouth. Perhaps Boots would sell the hat to him?
Oh, no! Boots could not think of such a thing as selling his fooling
cap.
Come, come; the king wanted that hat, and sooner than miss buying it he
would give a whole bag of gold money for it.
At this Boots looked up and looked down, scratching his head. Well, he
supposed he would have to sell the hat some time, and the king might as
well have it as anybody else. But for all that he did not like parting
with it.
So the king gave Boots the bag of gold, and Boots gave the king the old
tattered hat, and then he went his way.
After Boots had gone the king blew into the hat and blew into the hat,
but though he blew enough breath into it to sail a big ship, he did not
befool so much as a single titmouse. Then, at last, he began to see that
the fooling cap was good on nobody else’s head but Boots’s; and he was
none too pleased at that, you may be sure.
As for Boots, with his bag of gold he bought the finest clothes that
were to be had in the town, and when the next morning had come he
started away bright and early for the king’s house. “I have come,” said
he, “to marry the princess, if you please.”
At this the king hemmed and hawed and scratched his head. Yes; Boots had
befooled him sure enough, but, after all, he could not give up the
princess for such a thing as that. Still, he would give Boots another
chance. Now, there was the high-councillor, who was the wisest man in
all of the world. Did Boots think that he could fool him also?
Oh, yes! Boots thought that it might be done.
[Illustration: The old woman smashes pots and things at Boots’ bidding.
)(]
Very well; if he could befool the high-councillor so as to bring him to
the castle the next morning against his will, Boots should have the
princess and the half of the kingdom; if he did not do so he should have
his beating.
Then Boots went away, and the king thought that he was rid of him now
for good and all.
As for the high-councillor, he was not pleased with the matter at all,
for he did not like the thought of being fooled by a clever rogue, and
taken here and there against his will. So when he had come home, he
armed all of his servants with blunderbusses, and then waited to give
Boots a welcome when he should come.
But Boots was not going to fall into any such trap as that! No indeed!
not he! The next morning he went quietly and bought a fine large
meal-sack. Then he put a black wig over his beautiful red hair, so that
no one might know him. After that he went to the place where the
high-councillor lived, and when he had come there he crawled inside of
the sack, and lay just beside the door of the house.
By and by came one of the maid servants to the door, and there lay the
great meal-sack with somebody in it.
“Ach!” cried she, “who is there?”
But Boots only said, “Sh-h-h-h-h!”
Then the serving maid went back into the house, and told the
high-councillor that one lay outside in a great meal-sack, and that all
that he said was, “Sh-h-h-h-h!”
So the councillor went himself to see what it was all about. “What do
you want here?” said he.
“Sh-h-h-h-h!” said Boots, “I am not to be talked to now. This is a
wisdom-sack, and I am learning wisdom as fast as a drake can eat peas.”
“And what wisdom have you learned?” said the councillor.
Oh! Boots had learned wisdom about everything in the world. He had
learned that the clever scamp who had fooled the king yesterday was
coming with seventeen tall men to take the high-councillor, willy-nilly,
to the castle that morning.
When the high-councillor heard this he fell to trembling till his teeth
rattled in his head. “And have you learned how I can get the better of
this clever scamp?” said he.
Oh, yes! Boots had learned that easily enough.
[Illustration: The Councilor finds one in the Sack who teaches him
wisdom. ¶]
So, good! then if the wise man in the sack would tell the
high-councillor how to escape the clever rogue, the high-councillor
would give the wise man twenty dollars.
But no, that was not to be done; wisdom was not bought so cheaply as the
high-councillor seemed to think.
Well, the councillor would give him a hundred dollars then.
That was good! A hundred dollars were a hundred dollars. If the
councillor would give him that much he might get into the sack himself,
and then he could learn all the wisdom that he wanted, and more besides.
So Boots crawled out of the sack, and the councillor paid his hundred
dollars and crawled in.
As soon as he was in all snug and safe, Boots drew the mouth of the sack
together and tied it tightly. Then he flung sack, councillor, and all
over his shoulder, and started away to the king’s house, and anybody who
met them could see with half an eye that the councillor was going
against his will.
When Boots came to the king’s castle he laid the councillor down in the
goose-house, and then he went to the king.
When the king saw Boots again, he bit his lips with vexation. “Well,”
said he, “have you fooled the councillor?”
“Oh, yes!” says Boots, “I have done that.”
And where was the councillor now?
Oh, Boots had just left him down in the goose-house. He was tied up safe
and sound in a sack, waiting till the king should send for him.
So the councillor was sent for, and when he came the king saw at once
that he had been brought against his will.
“And now may I marry the princess?” said Boots.
But the king was not willing for him to marry the princess yet; no! no!
Boots must not go so fast. There was more to be done yet. If he would
come to-morrow morning he might have the princess and welcome, but he
would have to pick her out from among fourscore other maids just like
her; did he think that he could do that?
Oh, yes! Boots thought that that might be easy enough to do.
So, good! then come to-morrow; but he must understand that if he failed
he should have a good whipping, and be sent packing from the town.
So off went Boots, and the king thought that he was rid of him now, for
he had never seen the princess, and how could he pick her out from among
eighty others?
But Boots was not going to give up so easily as all that! No, not he! He
made a little box, and then he hunted up and down until he had caught a
live mouse to put into it.
When the next morning came he started away to the king’s house, taking
his mouse along with him in the box.
There was the king, standing in the doorway, looking out into the
street. When he saw Boots coming towards him he made a wry face. “What!”
said he, “are you back again?”
Oh, yes! Boots was back again. And now if the princess was ready he
would like to go and find her, for lost time was not to be gathered
again like fallen apples.
So off they marched to a great room, and there stood eighty-and-one
maidens, all as much alike as peas in the same dish.
Boots looked here and there, but, even if he had known the princess, he
could not have told her from the others. But he was ready for all that.
Before any one knew what he was about, he opened the box, and out ran
the little mouse among them all. Then what a screaming, and a hubbub
there was! Many looked as though they would have liked to swoon, but
only one of them did so. As soon as the others saw what had happened,
they forgot all about the mouse, and ran to her and fell to fanning her
and slapping her hands and chafing her temples.
“This is the princess,” said Boots.
And so it was.
After that the king could think of nothing more to set Boots to do, so
he let him marry the princess as he had promised, and have half of the
kingdom to boot.
That is all of this story.
Only this: It is not always the silliest one that sits kicking his feet
in the ashes at home.
[Illustration]
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