Mr. 'Coon said he was quite young when it happened, and was taking a
pleasant walk one evening, to think over things a little, and perhaps to
pick out a handy tree where Mr. Man's chickens roosted, when all at once
he heard a fierce bark close behind him, and he barely had time to get
up a tree himself when a strange and very noisy Mr. Dog was leaping
about at the foot of the tree, making a great fuss, and calling every
moment for Mr. Man to hurry, for he had a young 'coon treed.
"Of course I laid pretty low when I heard that," Mr. 'Coon said, "for I
knew that Mr. Man would most likely have a gun, so I got into a bunch of
leaves and brush that must have been some kind of an old nest and
scrooched down so that none of me would show.
[Illustration: ALL AT ONCE HE HEARD A FIERCE BARK CLOSE BEHIND HIM]
"Then by-and-by I heard some big creature come running through the
brush, and I peeked over a little, and there, sure enough, was Mr. Man
with a long gun, and I noticed that he wore a thing on his head--a sort
of hat, I suppose--made of what looked to be the skin of some relative
of mine.
"Of course that made me mad. I hadn't cared so much until I saw that;
but I said right then to myself that any one who would do such a thing
as that never could be a friend of mine, no matter how much he tried. So
I scrooched down and laid low in that old nest, and didn't move or let
on in any way that I was there.
"Then I heard Mr. Man walking around the tree and talking to his dog and
telling him that there wasn't anything up in that tree at all, and that
Mr. Dog had just been fooling him. I could tell by his voice that he was
getting mad at Mr. Dog, and I hoped that he'd get mad enough pretty soon
to take a stick to him for chasing me up a tree like that, and then
calling for Mr. Man to come and see me when there wasn't really anything
to look at.
"But Mr. Dog kept galloping around the tree and barking out, over and
over, that I was there; that he had seen me, and that he knew that I was
hiding up there somewhere; and pretty soon I heard Mr. Man going away,
and I peeked over again.
"Sure enough, he was going, but Mr. Dog was staying right there,
sitting under the tree and looking up and making a good deal more noise
than there was any need of to let me know he hadn't gone. I didn't see
why he stayed there. I wished he'd go away and tend to his own business.
"Being quite young, I still lived with my folks over near the Wide Grass
Lands, and I wanted to get home for supper. It was a good way to go, for
the tree I had climbed was over close to the edge of the world where the
sun and moon rise, and you all know that's a good way, even from here.
"Well, he didn't go, but just sat there, barking up that tree, and after
a long time I heard somebody coming again, and I peeked over and there
was Mr. Man, hurrying back, this time with an axe. I knew, right then,
there was going to be trouble. I knew they were going to cut that tree
down, and that I should most likely have quite a fuss with Mr. Dog, and
perhaps go home with a black eye and a scratched nose, and then get
whipped again for fighting, after I got there."
Mr. 'Coon stopped and knocked the ashes out of his pipe and filled it up
fresh, and all the others knocked the ashes out of their pipes and
filled them up fresh, too. Then Mr. 'Possum poked up the fire and told
Mr. Turtle to bring a stick of wood from down-stairs, and when it was
blazing up high and bright again they all stepped over to the window a
minute, to see how hard it was snowing and banking up outside, then
went back to their chairs around the fire, and stretched out their feet
and leaned back and smoked, and listened to the rest of Mr. 'Coon's
story.
Mr. 'Coon said he didn't like the sound of that axe when Mr. Man began
to cut the tree down.
"Every time he struck the tree I could feel it all through me," he said,
"and I knew if he kept that noise up long enough it would give me a
nervous headache. I wished the tree would hurry up and drop, so we could
have what muss we were going to, and get it over with. I'd have got out
of that old nest and made a jump for another tree if there had been any
near enough, but there wasn't, so I just laid low and gritted my teeth
and let him chop.
"Well, by-and-by that tree began to go down. It seemed to teeter a
little at first, this way and that; then it went very slow in one
direction; then it went a little faster; then it went a good deal
faster; then I suddenly felt like a shooting-star, I came down so fast,
and there was a big crash, and I thought I had turned into a lot of
stars, sure enough, and was shooting in every direction, and the next I
knew I was tied to a tree, hand and foot and around the middle, and Mr.
Man and Mr. Dog were sitting and looking at me, and grinning, and
talking about what they were going to do.
[Illustration: "THEN I SUDDENLY FELT LIKE A SHOOTING-STAR"]
"Mr. Man wasn't scolding Mr. Dog any more. He was telling him what a
good thing it was they had caught me alive, for now they could sell me
to a show and get a great deal more for me than they could for my skin.
I didn't know what a show was, then, or that a show is a menagerie, but
I know now, and I can see just what they meant.
"Pretty soon Mr. Man told Mr. Dog to stay there and watch me while he
went home after a box to put me in. He said he didn't think it would be
safe to carry me in his arms, and he was right about that.
"So then Mr. Man walked off, and left Mr. Dog guarding me, and saying
unpleasant things to me now and then.
"At first I wouldn't answer him; but pretty soon I happened to think of
something pleasant to say:
"'Mr. Dog,' I said, 'I know a good story, if you'd like me to tell it.
Mr. Man may be a good while getting that box, and mebbe you'd like to
hear something to pass the time.'
"Mr. Dog said he would. He said that Mr. Man would most likely have to
make the box, and he didn't suppose he knew where the hammer and nails
were, and it might be dark before Mr. Man got back.
"I felt a good deal better when I heard Mr. Dog say that, and I told him
a story I knew about how Mr. Rabbit lost his tail, and Mr. Dog laughed
and seemed to like it, and said, 'Tell me another.'"
[Illustration: "THEN MR. DOG SAID, 'TELL ME ANOTHER'"]
Before Mr. 'Coon could go on with his story, Mr. Rabbit said that of
course if that old tale had helped Mr. 'Coon out of trouble he was very
glad, but that it wasn't at all true, and that some time _he_ would tell
them himself the true story of how it happened.
Then they all said that they hoped he would, for they'd always wanted to
hear that story told right, and then Mr. 'Coon went on with his
adventure.
Mr. 'Coon said that when Mr. Dog said, "Tell me another," he knew he was
in a good-humor, and that he felt better and better himself. "I thought
if Mr. Man didn't come back too soon," he said, "I might get along
pretty well with Mr. Dog.
"'I know another story, Mr. Dog,' I said--'the funniest story there is.
It would make you laugh until you fell over the edge of the world, but I
can't tell it here.'
"'Why,' he said--'why can't you tell it here as well as anywhere?'
"'Because it has to be acted,' I said, 'and my hands are tied.'
"'Will you tell it if I untie your hands?' said Mr. Dog.
"'Well,' I said, 'I'll begin it, and you can see how it goes.'
"So Mr. Dog came over and untied my hands, for he said he could tie them
again before Mr. Man came back, because he knew Mr. Man hadn't found
that hammer yet.
"'You can't get loose with just your hands untied, can you?' he said.
"'No, of course not, Mr. Dog,' I said, pleasant and polite as could be.
"'Let's see you try,' said Mr. Dog.
"So I twisted and pulled, and of course I couldn't get loose.
"'Now tell the story,' said Mr. Dog.
"So I said: 'Once there was a man who had a very bad pain in his chest,
and he took all kinds of medicine, and it didn't do him any good. And
one day the Old Wise Man of the Woods told him if he would rub his chest
with one hand and pat his head with the other, it might draw the pain
out the top and cure him. So the man with the pain in his chest tried
it, and he did it this way.'
"Then I showed Mr. Dog just how he did it, and Mr. Dog thought that was
funny, and laughed a good deal.
"'Go on and tell the rest of it,' he said. 'What happened after that?'
"But I let on as if I'd just remembered something, and I said, 'Oh, Mr.
Dog, I'm _so_ sorry, but I can't tell the rest of that story here, and
it's the funniest part, too. I know you'd laugh till you rolled over the
edge of the world.'
"'Why can't you tell the rest of that story here as well as anywhere?'
said Mr. Dog, looking anxious.
"'Because it has to be acted with the feet,' I said, 'and my feet are
tied.'
"'Will you tell it if I untie your feet?' said Mr. Dog.
"'Well, I'll do the best I can,' I said.
"So Mr. Dog came over and untied my feet. He said he knew that Mr. Man
hadn't found the nails or the pieces to make the box yet, and there
would be plenty of time to tie me again before Mr. Man got back.
"'You can't get loose, anyway, with just your hands and feet untied, can
you?' he said.
"'No, of course not, Mr. Dog,' I said, more pleasant and polite than
ever.
"'Let's see you try,' said Mr. Dog.
"So I squirmed and twisted, but of course with a strong string around my
waist and tied behind I couldn't do anything.
"'Now go on with the story,' said Mr. Dog.
[Illustration: "AND DID ROLL OFF THE EDGE OF THE WORLD, SURE ENOUGH"]
"'Well,' I said, 'the pain left his chest, but it went into his back,
and he had a most terrible time, until one day the Old Wise Man of the
Woods came along and told him that he thought he ought to know enough by
this time to rub his back where the pain was and pat his head at the
same time to draw it out at the top. So then the man with the pain
rubbed his back and patted his head this way,' and I showed Mr. Dog how
he did it; and I rubbed a good while about where the knot was, and made
a face to show how the man with the pain looked, and then I said the
pain came back into his chest again instead of being drawn out at the
top; and I changed about and rubbed there awhile, and then I went around
to my back again, chasing that pain first one side and the other; and
then I said that the Old Wise Man of the Woods came along one day and
told him that he must kick with his feet too if he ever wanted to get
rid of that pain, because, after all, it might have to be kicked out at
the bottom; and when I began to kick and dance with both feet and to rub
with my hands at the same time, Mr. Dog gave a great big laugh--the
biggest laugh I ever heard anybody give--and fell right down and rolled
over and over, and did roll off the edge of the world, sure enough.
"I heard him go clattering into a lot of brush and blackberry bushes
that are down there, and just then I got that back knot untied, and I
stepped over and looked down at Mr. Dog, who had lodged in a brier patch
on a shelf about ten feet below the edge, where Mr. Man would have to
get him up with a ladder or a rope.
"'Do you want to hear the rest of the story, Mr. Dog?' I said.
"'I'll story _you_,' he said, 'when I catch you!'
"'I told you you'd laugh till you fell off the edge of the world,' I
said.
[Illustration: "I SET OUT FOR HOME WITHOUT WAITING TO SAY GOOD-BYE"]
"'I'll make _you_ laugh,' he said, 'when I catch you!'
"Then I saw he was cross about something, and I set out for home without
waiting to say good-bye to Mr. Man, for I didn't want to waste any more
time, though I missed my supper and got a scolding besides.
"But I was glad I didn't bring home a black eye and scratched nose, and
I'm more glad than ever now that Mr. Man didn't get back in time with
that box, or I might be in a menagerie this minute instead of sitting
here smoking and telling stories and having a good time on Christmas
Day."
The Story Teller looks down at the Little Lady.
"I'm glad Mr. 'Coon didn't get into the menagerie, aren't you?" she
says.
"Very glad," says the Story Teller.
"He went lickety-split home, didn't he?"
"He did that!"
"I like them to go lickety-split better than lickety-cut, don't you?"
says the Little Lady. "They seem to go so much faster."
"Ever so much faster," says the Story Teller.