Up, and by Railway with MR. WAGSTAFFE to Guzzleford to my COSIN PEG her
Wedding, and heard the Bells a ringing at 9 o'clock, the Marriage not to
be till 11, but found they were rung for an Election; 'SQUIRE CALLOW and
MR. FAIRPORT standing for County Members in the Room of MR. BROWNJOHN.
So, the Wedding over, we about the Town to see the Fun. A Fellow the
worse for Beer demanding whose Colours we wore, meaning our
Wedding-Favours, MR. WAGSTAFFE did pleasantly answer, HYMEN'S, whereupon
the Fellow, crying "CALLOW for ever!" did rush full at us, but, we
parting, slip between us and tumble headlong into the Mud. Good Lack! to
see what Numbers of Ragamuffins everywhere with their Hats awry, Noses
bleeding, or Eyes blacked, staggering under huge Placard Boards,
whereon, in great Letters, "CALLOW and Agriculture," or, "Vote for
FAIRPORT and Commerce!" The Windows and Balconies full of Ladies, some
pretty, to whom in my Wife's Absence I did kiss my Hand. But to think
of the Ladies wearing the Colours of the Candidates, Blue and Yellow,
but only for an Excuse to deck themselves out with Ribbons! In the
Streets, Horsemen galloping to and fro, to tell the State of the Polls,
and the Mob cheering and bantering them, mighty droll. 'SQUIRE CALLOW
did put up at the Barley-Mow, and MR. FAIRPORT at the Rising Sun, and
between the two Inns, with a few plump rosy Farmers in Top-Boots, was a
noisy Rabble, quarrelling and fighting, with Skins unwashed, and unshorn
Muzzles, whom the Candidates' Committee-Men, speaking to them from the
Windows, did call Free and Independent Electors. To some that harangued
them, the Mob did cry, "Go Home," and "Who cheated his Washerwoman?" or,
"How about the Workhouse Beef?" yet listened to a few that were familiar
and cracked old Jokes with them. Presently they addressed by the
Candidates in Turn; and nasty to see them pelt each Speaker with stale
Eggs. But to hear, as well as might be for the Shouting and Hissing,
'SQUIRE CALLOW promising the Farmers to restore the Corn Laws, and
laying the Potato Blight and late Sickness to Free Trade; while MR.
FAIRPORT did as loudly charge all the Woes and Grievances of the Country
on the Landlords. By-and-by, MR. FAIRPORT, the Poll going so much
against him, did give in, and then 'SQUIRE CALLOW come forward, and make
a brave Speech about our Glorious Institutions and the British Lion, and
so away to have his Election declared, to the Town Hall, in a Carriage
and Four, and the Rabblement after him. Then they left behind did set to
on both Sides to fling Stones, and 'SQUIRE CALLOW'S Mob did break the
Windows of the Rising Sun, and MR. FAIRPORT'S the Windows of the
Barley-Mow; which the Townsmen did say would be good for the Glaziers,
and MR. WAGSTAFFE do observe that the Conservative 'SQUIRE CALLOW hath
destructive Constituents. What with Publicans, and Lawyers, and Damage,
the Election will cost the Candidates L6000 or L7000 a-Piece, and to
think what a good Motive one must have to become a Parliament-Man, that
will spend so much Money for the Chance of a Seat.
[Illustration: _A PARTIE OF SPORTSMEN OUT A SHUTYNGE._