CHAPTER XV

Ronald was, as he had prophesied, a long time getting well. Even Helen

was a little puzzled, she who thought no evil, at the persistency of his

suffering; at the end of the second week he could, indeed, stumble about

with his two sticks, but still complained of great pain when he tried

to walk. The prolonged presence of the visitor began at last to become a

little trouble, even to the hospitable Manse, where strangers were

entertained so kindly, but where there was but one maid-of-all-work,

with the occasional services, chiefly outdoors, of the minister’s man;

and an invalid of Ronald’s robust character, whose presence necessitated

better fare and gave a great deal of additional work, was a serious

addition both to the expenses and labors of the house. It would have

been much against the traditions of the Manse to betray this in any way;

but there was no doubt that the minister was a little more sharp in his

speeches, and apt to throw a secret dart, in the disguise of a jest, at

the guest whose convalescence was so prolonged. Lily rode down from

Dalrugas every day to help to nurse the patient, that Helen might not

have the whole burden of his helplessness on her shoulders; but Lily,

too, became aware that, delightful though this freedom of meeting was,

and the long hours of intercourse which were made legitimate as being a

form of duty, they were beginning to last too long and awaken uneasy

thoughts. Helen, who was so tender to her at first, became a little

wistful as the days went on. The gentle creature could think no harm,

but perhaps it was her father’s remarks which put it into her head that

the two young people were making a convenience of her hospitality, and

that all was not honest in the tale which had brought so unlooked-for a

visitor under the shelter of her roof. And then the village, as was

inevitable, made many remarks. “Bless me, but the young leddy at

Dalrugas is an awfu’ constant visitor, Miss Eelen. She comes just as if

she was coming to her lessons every morning at the same hour.” “She is

the kindest heart in the world,” said Helen. “You see, this gentleman

that sprained his foot is a friend of her uncle’s, and she could not

take him to Dalrugas, where there is nobody but servants; and she will

not let me have all the trouble of him. A man, when he is ill, takes a

great deal of attendance,” said the minister’s daughter, with a smile.

“Losh! I would just let him attend upon himsel’,” said one.

“He should send for a sister, or somebody belonging to him,” said

another.

“Oh, not that,” said Helen--“I could not put up a lady, there is but

little room in the Manse--and with Miss Lily’s help we can pull

through.”

“He should get an easy post-chaise from Aberdeen--there’s plenty easy

carriages to be got there nowadays--and go back to his ain folk. He’s a

son of Lumsden of Pontalloch, they tell me; that’s not so far but that

he might get there in a day.”

“I have no doubt he will do that as soon as he is well enough,” said

Helen; but all these remarks made her uneasy. Impossible for Scotch

hospitality to give a hint, to intimate a thought, that the visitor had

overstayed his welcome--and a man that had been hurt and was, perhaps,

still suffering! “No, no,” she said, shaking her head. But it troubled

her gentle mind that Lily’s visits should be so remarked, and it was

strange--or was it only the village gossip that made her feel that it

was strange? Lily perceived all this with an uneasy perception of new

elements in the air.

“Ronald,” she said one day, when they were alone for a few minutes, “you

could put your foot to the ground without hurting when you try. You will

have to go away.”

“Why should I go away?” he said, with a laugh. “I am very comfortable.

It is not luxury, but it does very well when I see my Lily every

day----”

“But, oh,” she cried, the color coming to her cheeks, which had been

growing pale these few days, “there are things of more consequence than

Lily! The Manse people are not rich----”

“You need not tell me that,” he said, looking round at the shabby

furniture with a smile.

“But, oh, Ronald, you don’t see! They try to get nice things for you,

they spend a great deal of trouble upon you, and they were glad at

first--but it is now a fortnight.”

“Lily, my love,” he said quickly, “if you have ceased to care for this

chance of meeting every day--if you want me to go away, of course I will

go.”

“Do you think it likely I should have ceased to care?” she said, with

tears in her eyes. “But we must think of other people, too.”

“Thinking of other people is generally a mistake. We all know how to

take care of ourselves best--unless it is here and there some one like

you, if there is any one like my Lily. But, dear, I give very little

trouble. What is there to do for me? Another bed to make, another knife

and fork--or spoon, I should say, for we have broth, broth, and nothing

but broth--and a little grouse now and then, sent to them by somebody,

and therefore costing nothing.”

“It is ungenerous to say that!” Lily cried.

“My dearest, you will tell me what present I can send them when at last

I am forced to tear myself away. A good present that will make up to

them--a chest of tea, or a barrel of wine, or---- But I don’t want to go

away, Lily; I would rather stay here and see you every day until I am

forced to go back to my work.”

“Oh, and so would I!” cried Lily; “but,” she added, with a sigh, “we

must think of them. Mr. Blythe sits always, always in this room. It is

the sunny room in the house, and he likes it best. But you see he has

gone into his little study this day or two--which is very dreary--all

because we are here.”

“Very considerate of him,” said Ronald, with a laugh, “if that is a

reason for going away, that they now leave us sometimes alone. I fear it

will not move me, Lily; you must find a better than that.”

“Oh, Ronald, will you not see?” cried Lily in distress. But what could a

girl do? She could not put understanding into his eyes nor consideration

into his heart. He was willing to take advantage of these good people,

and the inducement was strong. She spoke against her own heart when she

urged him to go away, and she was glad to be laughed out of her

scruples, to be told of the “good present” that would make up for every

thing, of the gratitude that he would always feel, and his conviction

that he gave very little trouble, and added next to nothing to their

expenses. “Broth is not expensive,” he said, “and the grouse, you know,

Lily, the grouse!” Lily turned her head away, sick at heart. Oh, it was

not how he should speak of the people who were so kind to him; but

still, when she mounted Rory--now quite docile and accustomed to trot

every day into Kinloch-Rugas--in the afternoon, she could not but be

glad to think that she might still come to-morrow, that there was at

least another day.

One of these afternoons the parlor was full of people, under whose eyes

Lily could not continue to sit by the side of the sofa and minister to

the robust invalid’s wants. There was the doctor, who gave him a little

slap on his leg and said: “I congratulate ye on a perfect cure. You can

get up and walk when you like, like the man in the Bible.” And the

school-master’s wife, who said: “Eh, what a good thing for you, Mr.

Lumsden, and you been on your back so long.” And there was the assistant

and successor, Mr. Douglas, who was visibly anxious to get rid of all

interlopers and speak a word to Helen. Oh, why did he not follow Helen

when she went out to open the door for her visitors, and leave Lily free

to say once more to Ronald, but more energetically: “You must go!”

“I was wanting to say, sir,” said Mr. Douglas, “and I may add that I

have Miss Eelen’s opinion all on my side, that I would like very much if

you would say a parting word to the lads that are going out to Canada.

We have taken a great deal of trouble with them, and a word from the

minister----”

“You are the minister yourself, Douglas; they know more of you than they

do of me.”

“Not so, Mr. Blythe. I am your assistant, and Miss Eelen she is your

daughter and the best friend they ever had; but it’s your blessing the

callants want, and a word from you----”

“My blessing!” the old man said, with an uneasy laugh. “You’re

forgetting, my young man, that there’s no sacerdotal pretensions in the

auld Kirk.”

“You blessed them when they were christened, sir, and you blessed them

and gave them the right hand of fellowship when they came to the Lord’s

table. I’m thinking nothing of sacerdotalism. I’m thinking of human

nature. We have no bishops, but while we have ordained ministers we must

always have fathers in God.”

Mr. Blythe had never been of this new-fangled type of devotion. He had

been an old Moderate, very shy of overmuch religion, and relying upon

habit and tradition and a good deal of wholesome neglect. But the young

man’s earnestness, backed as it was by the serious light in Helen’s

eyes, brought a color to his old face. He was a little ashamed of the

importance given to him, and half angry at the young people’s high-flown

notions. “I am not sure,” he said, “that I go with you, Douglas, nor

with Eelen either, in your dealings with these lads. You just cultivate

a kind of forced religion in them, that makes a fine show for a moment;

it’s the seed that fell by the wayside and sprang up quickly, but had no

root in itself.”

“We can never tell that, sir,” said the assistant; “it may help them

when they have no ordinances to mind them of their duty. If they

remember their Creator in the days of their youth----”

“’Deed,” said the old minister, “it is just as often as not to forget

every thing all the quicker when they come to man’s estate. Solomon knew

mainy things, but not the lads in a parish so near the Highlant line.”

“Anyway, father, it will be kindly like, and them going so far, far

away.”

“That is just it,” said Mr. Blythe: “why should they go far, far away?

Why couldn’t ye let them jog on as their fathers did before them? I’m

not an advocate for emigration. There are plenty of things the lads

could do without leaving their own country. Let them go to Glasgow,

where there’s work for every-body, or to the South. You think you can do

every thing with your arrangements and your exhortations, and looking

after more than ye were ever asked to look after. I have never approved

of all these meetings and things, and your classes and your lessons, and

all the fyke you make about a few country callants. Let them alone to

their fathers’ advice and their mothers’. You may be sure the women will

all warn them to keep off the drink--and much good it will do, whatever

you may say, either them or you.”

“But just a word of farewell, sir,” pleaded the assistant; “we ask no

more.”

“And that is just a great deal too much in present circumstances,” cried

the old minister. “Where would ye have me speak to them--a dozen big

country lads, like colts out of the stable? I cannot go out to the cold

vestry at night, me that seldom leaves the house at all. And the

dining-room is too small, and what other room have we free? Eelen, you

know that as well as me. I cannot have them up in my bedchalmer, and the

kitchen, with lasses in it, would be no place for such a ceremonial. No,

no; we have no room, that is true.”

“I hope, sir,” said Ronald from his sofa, “you are not saying this from

consideration for me. I’d like nothing better than to see the boys, and

hear your address to them. It would be good, I am sure, and I am as much

in need of good advice as any of them can be.”

“You are very considerate, Mr. Lumsden,” said the minister, after a

pause. “It is a great thing to have an inmate that takes so much

thought. But how can I tell that it would not be bad for you in your

delicate state, with your nurses at your side all the day?”

“Delicate! I am not delicate!” cried Ronald, with a flush. “It is only,

you know, this confounded foot.”

“Well, Douglas,” said the minister, “between Mr. Lumsden’s confoondit

foot and your confoondit pertinacity, what am I to do? Since your

patient, Eelen, is so kind and permits the use of our best parlor, have

them in, have ben your callants. I must not be less gracious than my own

guest,” the old man said.

Lily went away trembling after this scene, giving Ronald a beseeching

glance, but she had no opportunity for a word. Next day, still

tremulous, she returned, to find him still there, a little defiant, not

to be driven out. But a short time after, when she was again preparing

to go into the “toun”--without any pleasant looks now from her

household, or complaisance on the part of Dougal, who openly bemoaned

his pony--the whole population of Dalrugas turned out to see the inn

“geeg” once more climbing the brae. It contained Ronald and his

portmanteau, speeding off to catch the coach, but incapable, as he said,

in the hearing of every-body, of going away without thanking and saying

farewell to his kind nurse. “Do you know what this young lady did for

me?” he said to the little company, which included Rory, ready saddled,

and the black pony harnessed, with the boy at his head. “She lifted me,

I think, from where I lay, and put me on her own beast, like the good

Samaritan. She was more than the good Samaritan to me. Look at her, like

a fairy princess, and me a heavy lump, almost fainting, and with but one

foot. That is what charity can do.”

“Well, it was a wonderful thing,” Katrin allowed, “but maist more than

that was riding down ance errand to the town to take care of ye every

day.”

“Ah, that was for Miss Blythe’s sake and not mine,” he said. “May I come

in, Miss Ramsay, to give you her message? Oh, Robina, I am glad to see

you here. I can carry the last news to Sir Robert, and tell him how both

mistress and maid are thriving on the moor.”

It was all false, false, as false as words that were true enough in

themselves could be. Lily ran up the spiral stair, while Beenie helped

him to follow. The girl’s heart was beating high with more sensations

than she could discriminate. This was the parting, then, after so long a

time together; the farewell, which was more dreadful than words could

say--and yet she was glad he was going. He was her own true-love, and

nobody was like him in the world, and yet Lily’s mind revolted against

every word he said.

“Why did you say all that?” she cried, breathless, when they were alone.

“It was not wanted, surely, here!”

“Necessary fibs,” he said. “You are too particular, Lily, for me that am

only carrying out my rôle. You see, I am obeying you and going away at

last.”

“Oh, Ronald, it was not that I wanted you to go away.”

“No, if I could have gone away, yet stayed all the same. But one can’t

do two opposite things at the same time. And, Lily, it must be good-by

now--for a little while. You will look out for me at the New Year.”

“Do you call it just a little while to the New Year?” she cried, with

the tears in her eyes.

“Three months, or a little more. I shall not come to Kinloch-Rugas; I’ll

find a lodging in some little farm. And in the meantime you will write

to me, Lily, and I will write to you.”

“Yes, Ronald,” she said, giving him both her hands. Was this to be all?

It was not for her to ask; it was for him to say:

“My bonnie Lily! If I could but carry you off, never to part more! But

if nothing happens to release you, if Sir Robert does not relent, mind,

my dearest, we must make up our minds and take it into our own hands. He

is not to keep us apart forever. You will let me know all that goes on,

and whether those people down stairs have reported the matter; and I,

for my part, will take my measures. When we meet again, every thing will

be clearer. And, Lily, on your side, you will tell me every thing, that

we may see our way.”

“There will be nothing to tell you, Ronald. There will be no report

sent; Uncle Robert, I think, has forgotten my existence. There will be

nothing, nothing to say but that it is weary living alone here on the

moor.”

“Not more weary than my life in Edinburgh, pacing up and down the

Parliament House, and looking out for work. But we’ll see what is going

to happen before the New Year; and I will send the present to those good

Manse folk, and you will keep up with them, for they may be very useful

friends. Is it time for me to go? Well, I will go if I must; and good-by

for the present, my darling, good-by till the New Year!”

Was it possible that he was gone, that it was all over, and Lily left

again alone on the moor? She ran to Beenie’s room, which was on the

other side of the house, to watch the inn “geeg” as long as it was in

sight. Nothing is ever said of what is intended to be said in a hasty

last meeting like this. It was worse than no meeting at all, leaving all

the ravelled ends of parting. And was it true that all was over, and

Ronald gone and nothing more to be done or said?

Sir Robert's Fortune: A Novel · 第 15 / 48 章