Whereas, on certain boughs and sprays
Now divers birds are heard to sing,
And sundry flowers their heads upraise;
Hail to the coming on of Spring!
The songs of those said birds arouse
The memory of our youthful hours,
As green as those said sprays and boughs,
As fresh and sweet as those said flowers.
The birds aforesaid--happy pairs--
Love, ’mid the aforesaid boughs, enshrines
In freehold nests: themselves, their heirs,
Administrators and assigns.
Oh, busiest term of Cupid’s Court,
Where tender plaintiffs actions bring--
Season of frolic and of sport,
Hail, as aforesaid, coming Spring!
* * * * *
Life, we are told, is a trial, but the worst of it is there is no Court
of Appeal we can go to in the event of our not being satisfied with the
result of it. For myself, I should like uncommonly to move for a new
trial.
_Briefless Barrister._
* * * * *
[Illustration: WIT AT A DISADVANTAGE.--“Well, Jackson, you are always
here for being drunk, so I shall fine you five shillings.”
“Not got a penny, your worshup.”
“Not a penny, sir!”
“I got only coppers,--‘hot coppers,’ your worshup.”
[_He was most promptly and most properly locked up._]
* * * * *
THE RULE OF THE ROAD.--_Query (from a correspondent)._--When a street
runs into another street, what is the remedy at law?
_The Answer._--Consult a solicitor.
* * * * *
CONSCIENTIOUS LAWYER’S ADVICE.--Do right; don’t write.
* * * * *
A JURYMAN OF A SIZE.--A Welsh publican who weighs thirty stone has
lately been informed that his bulk will not invalidate him from sitting
on juries. “Squashing the verdict” is likely to become a popular
feature of the Welsh Assizes.
* * * * *
MOTTO FOR THE OPPONENTS OF CAPITAL PUNISHMENT. No noose is good news!
* * * * *
CALLED TO THE “BA.”--The shepherd’s dog.
* * * * *
THE ENDS OF JUSTICE.--A cat-o’-nine-tails.
* * * * *
More judges required. We don’t want to hear so much of Chancery
Division as of Chancery multiplication.
* * * * *
[Illustration: SHOWS HIS BREEDING.--_Equestrian (to policeman on the
look-out for a stolen horse)._ “‘How did I come by ’im?’ Why, bred ’im
myself, to be sure--down at a little place o’ my own.”]
* * * * *