THE GAIETY OF GOING
"Oh, Glorious gaiety!"
"Oh, delightful dissipation!"
"Oh, luscious loafing!"
"Oh, wayside wanderings!"
These remarks emanated from the exuberant spirits of Jack Kimball,
Paul Hastings, Ed Foster and Walter Pennington.
It was a few evenings after the moving picture performance had ended
so abruptly, and the young men insisted that this time they would
"take in" some other attractions. The young ladies were almost equally
enthusiastic, and therefore it was decided that the beautiful June
evening be spent in the perfectly innocent sport of further
sight-seeing at the select summer colony centre.
On the other evening when Ed thrust the light under the eyes of the
little singer, who was following the manager's instructions to "sing
for all she was worth, to catch the crowd," and the girl had darted
away, frightened at the rather daring act of attempt at recognition,
Cora insisted that the singer was none other than Rose Catron.
But the darkness and confusion of the place made it impossible for
even the Chelton boys to make their way back of the stage and
investigate further.
Jack did try it, but the tangle of boxes and heaps of stage fixings so
blocked his way that he was forced to give up before he reached what
ought to be the stage entrance. Ed and Walter searched for the manager
with equally unsatisfactory results, and so, for the time being, the
quest had to be abandoned; although Cora was keenly disappointed in
having to leave the place with no clue as to the real identity of the
little singer.
That the girls had not drowned themselves was all the assurance that
Belle needed to restore her peace of mind on that subject, while Bess
insisted she would take the _Flyaway_ and run down to the place so
early next morning that if the performer should prove to be Rose, she
would scarcely have had time to pick up her things in daylight, and
again escape. Hazel was also interested when told of the girls'
strange story, and in her gentle yet decisive way, she offered to do
what she could while at the beach to discover the possible whereabouts
of Rose and Nellie. But the search was unavailing, as no one in
authority at the moving picture theatre would answer questions
satisfactorily.
"To-night," said Walter, as they started out again, "let the girls
choose the attraction."
They sauntered along the brilliantly-lighted boardwalk. All the style
available at the colony seemed to be on parade, and, as far as our
girl friends were concerned, they would really have preferred to
remain in the procession, but for the knowledge that the boys wanted
to see what was going on in the big building at the end of the pier.
"The Human Washing Machine!" shouted Jack, after a glance at the sign.
"Now there is a practical attraction and I am willing to pay the bill
for 'doing up' every one in the crowd."
To this novelty the party betook themselves. Outside the entrance were
people deliberating upon going in, but hesitating because the
billboards announced that "each person would be put through the most
novel and most complete process of washing to be obtained anywhere, at
the low cost of ten cents the person."
But the Chelton folks were not afraid--they might have halted at the
ironing possibility, but nothing in the way of washing had any terrors
for the motor girls and their friends.
"Oh, my!" exclaimed Belle. "I could never go in that!"
"Why?" demanded Walter. "It looks perfectly tempting. Smell that soap
suds!" A whiff came out of the building to them.
"And look at the blueing," cried Cora, pointing to a mass of blue
water flowing from a pipe outside the structure. "If we never had the
'blues' we will have them now--all ready-made."
"If never you've been blue, prepare to be blue now," quoted Ed, with
semi-tragic effect.
"Come along! Come right along!" shouted the "barker," or man who was
booming the attraction. "This way for the greatest sensation outside
of flying! Step this way--everybody! You pays your money and you gets a
good wash! Satisfaction guaranteed. The servant problem solved. Here
you are, young ladies and gentlemen--right this way!" and he looked at
our friends in a humorous manner.
"Hear that?" called Jack. "He has us spotted, all right. He knows we
need it, maybe. I'm going in first."
"That's the way to talk," commented the barker. "You'll never regret
it, my friend. Step this way to the ticket office. Remember, ladies
and gentlemen," he went on, in louder tones, "this is the only human
washing machine on the beach. There are washing machines run by human
beings but this is absolutely and without doubt the only
self-regulated, double acting, six cylinder, four speeds forward and
reverse machine, that washes human beings in the short space of ten
minutes--one sixth of an hour--six hundred seconds, and I say that
without fear of successful contradiction. This way--everybody!"
"Here goes," went on Jack, as he purchased a number of tickets from a
roll unwound by a woman in a little cage of an office. "I'll try it
first, and if I survive the bleaching process the rest of you can come
in."
"Oh!" cried Bess. "I'll never, never do it!"
"Me, either," added Belle.
"Wait until we see what it is," suggested Cora. "It may be great fun,
and, as long as it's not vulgar I'm going in, if Jack says it's all
right."
"Come one, come all!" the barker could be heard droning. The party of
boys and girls went into the place, and found themselves in the midst
of an excited and jolly crowd. Some had been washed, others needed
washing, some wanted washing, and others desired it, but feared to
undertake the ordeal.
"Good-bye!" called Jack, gaily, as he walked along a narrow passage,
protected by a railing on either side, for an attendant directed there
all who wanted to indulge in the new sensation.
"Hold on!" cried Ed and Walter. "We're coming, too!"
"Get a hustle on," ordered Jack. "The water is just right now."
The girls stood where they could watch the process. Suddenly Jack and
his chums could be seen bobbing up and down, as if they were in a boat
on a choppy sea, and then the girls noticed that the lads were on a
sort of endless, moving sidewalk, that did all sorts of queer "stunts"
while, underneath, water rushed and bubbled along, seemingly all about
the boys, but never touching them.
"You are now in the tub of soapy water," announced a man who was
evidently there for that purpose. "You are getting the first layer of
contamination off."
Faster and faster went the moving, endless sidewalk. It surged up and
down, and from side to side. The boys were laughing and joking, and
they had to cling to the railing to maintain their footing.
"This is great!" cried Jack.
"All to the la-la!" added Ed.
"It most----" began Walter, but, at that minute all three came to the
end of the first scrubbing process, and were precipitated upon a
highly polished slide--somewhat like the bamboo ones that are so
popular at summer resorts. It was like glass, and, as there were only
a few lights at this point, whereas the "tub" was brilliantly
illuminated, the boys went down in a heap, and slid along.
"Part of the game," commented Jack, grimly.
"You are now on the washing board," came from the announcer. "Keep
perfectly still--there is no danger."
In front of, and behind, the boys came other persons--slipping,
sliding, shouting, yelling, laughing, gasping and struggling.
"Wow!" yelled Ed. "Here comes another tub to go through!"
They had reached the end of the "washboard" and once more the three
boys were tossed up and down, and from side to side, while rushing
water under them seemed to give the effect of being put through a
boiler of suds.
"Look out! Here's something new!" yelled Ed, a moment later, and, sure
enough, they emerged, after a trip up and down, and around corners,
upon a scrubbing board, made of glass, under which water was rushing
with such effect that it seemed as if they were going to be soaked.
"This is great!" cried Jack, as he reached it. "I thought I was in for
it that time, but it's all to the soap and starch; that's what!"
His companions, and many others, followed, and, a moment later, they
were facing what looked like two rolls, such as collars and cuffs are
run through.
"Do we go through them?" gasped Jack, halting a moment as he got on
his feet after the slide down the scrubbing board.
"Sure--go ahead," said Walter.
"Oh, mercy! He won't really go through those rolls, will he?" gasped
Belle.
The rolls did look formidable, and they were whirling around at a
rapid rate.
"Be a sport," called Ed. "When you've been rolled out you'll be all
right, Jack."
"All right--you go ahead," retorted Jack, stepping back. "You can have
my place."
"It's all right, fellows--go ahead," one of the attendants assured
them. Jack faced the revolving rolls. The attendant gave him a gentle
push, and, before Jack knew it he was swallowed up in the whirling
cylinders.
"Oh!" screamed Bess. "He'll be killed!"
But neither she nor the others could see what happened, for Jack
vanished, and, after him went Walter and Ed.
Once through the rolls, they were tossed with considerable force into
a wringer ten times the size of the one through which they had just
passed. Like the first the rolls were upright, and not horizontal.
They seemed to be made of rubber, and were more real than the first.
Jack tried to hold back, but it was of no use. He had been tossed
fairly into the big wringer, and, a moment later, he found himself
being drawn through. To his surprise the rolls were of straw, covered
with cotton-batting, and they compressed sufficiently to allow him to
go through easily.
"Come on, fellows!" Jack tried to call to his chums, but his mouth was
stopped for an instant by the soft rolls. Besides, there was no need
for his invitation, since Ed and Walter, whether they wanted to or
not, found themselves being drawn in with irresistible force.
By this time the girls had run up, not without some little alarm, and
they saw the boys come through the rolls.
"Oh--they--they're all--all right," gasped Belle, her hand on her heart.
"Of course," cried Jack, with a laugh. "We're most done, ladies. Then
it will be your turn."
"Never!" declared Cora.
"Oh, you'll like it, ladies," the attendant assured them. "Next comes
the blueing water," and Jack and his friends, together with a number
of other persons who were undertaking the ordeal, were once more on a
moving sidewalk, sliding up and down, from side to side, and over a
mass of blue, rushing water, which, seen through the sections of the
walk, looked as if, every minute, it would surge up all about their
feet. But they were as dry as the proverbial bone.
"Now if you will kindly step this way you will be hung out to dry,"
called the attendant, and a door opened, and the boys with several
others were fairly shot out into a yard, where they saw what they
supposed were persons hanging over clothes lines.
Jack recoiled at this.
"Go ahead. Be a sport," urged Ed.
Then Walter burst into a laugh.
"Why, they're dummies!" he gasped. "Straw figures!" And so they
proved.
"All over!" announced a man. "Have another wash. It will do you good."
"Not for mine," declared Jack. "I'm clean enough to last a month."
"I'm going to have some more," announced Walter.
"So am I," declared Ed. "I'll go through with the girls this time."
"And there's Paul yet to be initiated," added Walter.
They hurried back to where they had left their friends.
"The greatest ever!" declared Jack. "I wouldn't have missed it for
anything. Go ahead, girls. It's the greatest fun!"
"But those wringers?" faltered Bess. "Aren't you pressed flat?"
"Try it--and see," replied Jack, all unconscious of the joke he was
perpetrating at the expense of the plump girl.
"Were they rubber?" asked Belle.
"Go through and see," was all Jack would answer.
"I'll try it," volunteered Paul.
"So will I," added Cora bravely.
"Oh, don't!" begged Belle.
"Of course I will. I'm not afraid, after Ed, Walter and Jack have been
through it. Besides, look at all the other girls and ladies who
venture in."
"That's the way to talk," said the attendant admiringly. "In you go,
young lady," and he assisted Cora upon the narrow footpath of the
first "tub." Cora went through it all, with Paul close behind her. It
was all perfectly proper, and not too rough, and the girl thoroughly
enjoyed it, even to the two rolling machines. She came back with her
cheeks flushed from the exercise and excitement.
"Go ahead, girls!" urged Cora to her chums. "It is a most novel
experience."
"I would, only for the wringers," agreed Bess.
"And I would--only--only for the slide," declared Belle, and no amount
of urging could induce her or her sister to venture the novelty. But
they had lots of fun watching others get "washed," and even Hazel took
a trip, with Jack to keep her company, for he reconsidered his
determination not to take another "dip."
Jack, his chums, the boys, and Cora and Hazel were such a merry party,
and attracted so much attention that the man in charge of the machine,
after they had each enjoyed two trips through it, came up, and said:
"Say, go through again--for nothing."
"Why?" inquired Jack.
"Oh, because you're such a jolly bunch that you are drawing a big
crowd in here," was the explanation. "The man outside is turning 'em
away. That's good business for us. Have another dip or two for
nothing. Only keep up the laughing and shouting."
"No, thank you," responded Cora, with a smile. "We are not human
advertisements, if we have gone through a human washing machine," and,
to the man's evident disappointment, they walked out of the place.
Bess laughed so uproariously at the sight of a stout woman essaying a
trip through the machine, that the motor girl had to sit down on a box
to get her breath.
"Oh, I never laughed so much in all my life," she said.
"Laugh and grow fat," commented the attendant, meaning no harm.
Bess stopped her mirth suddenly, and gave the man such a look, that,
as Jack said, if glances could kill, the poor chap would have been
"crippled for life."
"I wish he was!" snapped Bess, who was very sensitive about her
weight. "I never heard of such a thing--just because I laughed a
little."
"You should have gone through the rolls," ventured Cora. "Though they
looked hard, they were as soft as a feather pillow. Come on; there's
time yet."
But even the inducement of "feather pillows," would not tempt Bess or
Belle to try the machine.
"Well, what next?" asked Jack, as they stood out on the big pier, and
listened to the mournful swish of the incoming tide underneath. "What
do you say to another moving picture show, or the band concert, or
some salt-water taffy or even a lobster supper? I'm game."
"I vote for lobsters," called Ed.
"Because they're such friends of yours," retorted Walter.
"Mighty good friends, at the prices they charge down here," commented
Paul. "I haven't dared look one in the face."
"Silly--a lobster hasn't a face," said his sister.
"Well, their eyes, then," amended Paul.
"I think my sister and I must really go," came from Paul. "It is
getting late--for us."
"Yes, it is too late for anything more to-night," was Cora's retort.
"If we don't get in on good time, you know, boys, our liberty on other
occasions may be restricted."
"Well, have your way about it," answered Jack, good-naturedly. "There
are other nights coming."
"Yes, let's go home," added Belle, and Bess tried to hide a sleepy
yawn, for they had traveled about considerable that day, and she was
tired.
So Paul and Hazel said good-night, and the others, entering the autos,
turned into the ocean boulevard and started toward Clover Cottage.
"We'll drive up, and put the machines away later," suggested Jack,
when they were near their home quarters. "We really have been quite a
long time away."
They found Mrs. Robinson and Miss Steel waiting on the porch.
"Why, mamma has not retired yet," exclaimed Bess. "I wonder at her
sitting out of doors in the damp."
But the reason of this was soon made plain. Mrs. Robinson was too
frightened to go indoors!
"Oh, we have had such a dreadful time," she sobbed. "I cannot see how
you could have gone and left us in this lonely place all this while."
Bess instantly had her arms around the trembling little woman. Mrs.
Robinson had always been "babied" by the girls, and that she was very
nervous her whole family knew too well.
"Mother dear," began Bess, "we did not think it too late. You said we
might stay until--after nine----"
"But, daughter! How did I know we were to be frightened to death
by--burglars!"
"Burglars!" chorused the boys.
"Yes," put in Miss Steel, "we distinctly heard them in the dining
room, and when I had the courage to attempt to go in they--blew out the
lamp!"
"Mercy!" exclaimed Belle, recoiling from the window she had been
leaning against.
"It might have been--a draft of wind," suggested Walter.
"But a draft could not knock over a chair," Miss Steel told him,
somewhat indignantly. "We would have gone over to the hotel if we
could have left any word for you, but, you see, we could not go
inside, even to write a note."
A thought flashed through Cora's mind. The mention of "note" had
inspired it. She drew Bess and Belle aside.
"I wouldn't wonder if these runaway girls came back," she whispered.
"We must go inside and see if they--left a note."
"Go inside!" repeated Belle. "I guess not."
"Come on, boys! Let's investigate," said Walter to the others, opening
the hall door and striking a match as he did so. He lighted the
hanging lamp in the little hall, while the women, with Bess and Belle,
actually left the porch and went out on the sidewalk to be at a safe
distance.
Cora followed the boys.
"Who's here?" asked Jack as he entered the dining room.
"Light up!" commanded Ed. "We might step on somebody's fingers."
The dining-room light was soon burning. Yes, a chair had been
overturned, and another!
"The flower vase is broken!" exclaimed Cora, seeing the wreck in the
centre of the table.
"And I gathered those posies!" said Ed. "Just my luck!"
"Come right along, gentlemen," invited Walter to the invisible
intruders. "Come along! This way to the refrigerator!"
"Be careful, Walter," cautioned Cora, for although she had undertaken
to follow the boys she had not counted on seeing things thus upset.
"There are candles in the pantry," suggested Ed. "I know, because I
put them there, after I found the oil can in the cellar."
Jack and Walter each lighted a candle. They then undertook a
systematic search. Closets, cupboards, corners and stairways were
ransacked, every door was opened and closed, to make sure no one swung
on the hinges. Then the searching party went upstairs.
The same thoroughness was observed on the second floor, but no hint of
whom the intruders might be was brought to light. It took some time to
go over all the smaller rooms, and, when every nook had been finally
explored, Cora sat down for a moment on the hall seat.
"Listen!" she whispered.
A sound from the dining room had caught her attention.
"It's the girls," said Walter, as he, too, heard something downstairs.
"They would never come in until we assured them everything was all
right," objected Cora.
"Let's go down," said Ed, at the same moment, almost falling over the
bannister in his haste to get down quickly.
"There they go!" called Walter, who was just back of Jack, and, as he
said this, a figure darted out the rear door, and made away, before
the boys could get out of the house to follow.
"This way!" shouted Jack to Ed, as they finally did reach the open
yard. "I saw them go over that fence."
A light from the street at the rear of the cottage was now to be seen.
"An auto!" yelled Ed. "They are ready to start! Quick, Walter! Head
them off at the corner!"
But the first buzz of the strange machine was of that determined
quality that usually indicates great power, capable of spurting some
rods away with one great, grand whizz! The car was out of sight, and
out of sound, while Walter was struggling with the stickers of a
barbed wire fence. A dark stretch of road, that at once united and
separated two summer resorts, made the flight of the intruders' car
too simple to speculate upon.
"If our garage was not so far away," complained Walter, returning from
the fence with bleeding fingers, "we'd have a race."
"Hanged funny, isn't it?" commented Ed.
"As if that--person--we saw get away was a robber! Why, that was a
girl--she crawled under the fence!" declared Walter.
"She may have left me a bunch of violets," remarked Jack with a sigh,
as they all three went back to the cottage, where, at the steps, Cora
was waiting. "Say, sis," her brother went on, "let's go in and look
over things now. I have an idea that our visitor came to wash up more
dishes!"
"And I also have an idea that the visitor--had been here before,"
replied Cora. "They--he--she, or it--knew how to open that funny catch on
the screen door!"
Re-entering the house the boys made all sorts of fun of each other,
for each and all of them allowing the "burglar" to escape.
"But, joking aside," said Cora, "I know I heard the noise in the
dining room, and I'm going to look there first."
"For my violets," whimpered Jack, with a sniffle.
"June violets!" mocked Cora.
"Well--daisies then. I saw daisies as we came out, and I'd just as soon
have daisies."
Ed and Jack held their candles high above their heads as they tiptoed
into the dining room.
A bit of paper fluttered from the hanging lamp!
"More directions on 'How to Use This Cottage!'" roared Jack. "There,
didn't I tell you! This is the second note left this way. Must have
come by a homing-pigeon. Well, I'd just as soon have a dove as a
bouquet of violets."